"Oh my...I thought you were a vampire!! I mean, I didn't rationally think that you were a vampire, but I had convinced myself that you are."
He laughed quietly, then covered his rose-colored lips with a slender hand. I fought the urge to ask him to open his mouth again so I could hunt for unusually pointy teeth. He caught me looking at him, and his eyes glittered a fierce blue with amusement and something I couldn't identify.
"I wish the real world were that exciting. But nope, not a vampire. Sorry to disappoint."
I took this new bit of information as seamlessly as I could muster, straining my hazy brain to comprehend what he had been telling me.
I stepped into my bedroom as James continued talking. I had to get out of these clothes.
"...and so they paid me fifty thousand euros to replace it with the fake. I had never been the planter before, usually my task was much more menial, but they doubled the price. And when I still refused they threatened my life. I gave in after that."
I laid down on the bed and pulled my pants off, opting instead for a much more forgiving pair of sweats.
"Grey, are you even listening to me? I am openly confessing to a very high dollar crime here, and you're struggling to shove your cock into your pants."
I blushed violently and rolled off the bed. How had he seen that??
"Hey, you know, you should really consider relocating that mirror. But if you want to take your shirt off now, you can just come in here. I won't bite."
"So basically," I mumbled through a t-shirt I was yanking over my head, "you're a criminal. You aided a criminal. That's a crime. You conspired with an art thief."
"Whoa now," James sputtered, "I did not conspire with anybody to do anything. I was the innocent moron who was embarrassingly strung along by a very powerful man."
I frowned subconsciously as my mind caught up with his words. I was beginning to understand. He was more or less innocent.
"...and replace it with a more modern version. Sure, this version was maybe not as beautiful and sacred as the original, but this wasn't entirely my fault. I just planted it."
Mmm-hmm. James was indeed the most romanticized of all criminals incarnate; he was an art thief. That just served to reinforce my thought of his perfection. Unbelievably handsome, charmingly suave, and riddled with bad.
He explained away my inhibitions about conversing with the devil, whom my sneaky subconscious had been convinced was seducing me. And when he asked why I stayed away for four long weeks, I answered truthfully that I had no desire to date a vampire, and I didn't want to be eaten before or after sex, no matter how amazingly endowed he happened to be. Which, judging from the little tent rising in his pants, was very endowed. I wanted more than anything to see it for myself. He smiled that lovely smile of his and relaxed into my sofa. A part of my brain sighed with contentment as I noticed how at ease he looked. As though I had bought the couch with him as a permanent fixture.
Oh no, this wasn't good. I could not be falling for him. I barely knew him! Why did I want to kiss him so badly? Why did I care that he had chosen tea over coffee? I debated asking him to stay the night, telling him I could help him relax a little more.
"I didn't break in, I didn't cause any damage, all I did was remove a priceless artifact from the grimy hands of the public and put in its place a more new, improved form. It's better this way. That library didn't know what they had."
"So this book I've got here, what is it?" I asked stupidly, dreading the answer.
"That's the fake." he said simply.
I hung my head, trying in vain to mask my expression from him. I knew I shouldn't have asked. This man had stolen a book worth an insane amount of...
"How much was that book, the original, worth?"
James got up and maneuvered around the coffee table, effectively avoiding my question and gaze. He glanced at the front door, as though he was expecting someone to come crashing through the frame at any minute, then started toying with the hem on his shirt. He still wouldn't speak. I didn't want to press him, so I just sat patiently and watched. He bit his full bottom lip and scratched his nose, ran his fingers through his hair repeatedly, and checked his watch about seven times.
"I don't want to keep you," I began uncertainly, "you don't owe me anything. Don't feel as though you do. I'm just trying to understand."