A Diary for Two

A very slow built story about a character's transformation from being entirely male, to having to accept his magically switching gender. There are sexy bits and they will be more frequent in planned subsequent chapters, but they are not the main focus.

Please do not expect any quick thrill out of this story, but please make the most of the progressive development of the protagonist(s).

Also, whilst I did not mention this in my previous chapters, this is my first attempt at writing erotic literature. The feedback I got from the previous parts was very nice and very helpful, and I'd truly appreciate a continued feedback from any readers who are interested.

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October 15, 2014

I was lying in bed, and feeling as if I were floating atop a solid cloud of soft, dry air, with my body exposed to the heavens. My legs and arms outstretched to the sides, I could feel my skin warm slightly, as I saw her naked feminine shapes in my minds' eye. She stared down at me with a soft, sensuous smile, and I sensed the soft, wet, sexual warmth gathering around my groin.

Her legs were long and firm; her hips slightly wide in contrast to her thin waist, above which two beautifully shaped breasts were laid, showing a deep softness despite being of ever so slightly modest size. Her slim arms and delicate hands spread out from her slight shoulders left her exquisitely thin neck bare. Her almond shaped face was curtained with long blond locks, as she gazed down at me with her deep blue eyes.

I could sense heat flowing from her hairless crotch as she started purring in excitement, savoring the sight of me. I knew I was becoming excited with her, preparing to reach out to her, to fornicate with her, to make us one. As she hovered ever closer to me, she reached down to her exposed and vulnerable sex, separating her pink lips slightly with one finger as she pulled it up and along the slit. As her finger entered into contact with the small nub above it, she shuddered, and so did I. My longing was becoming unbearable as my excitement became intolerable, as I slowly felt the burning of my crotch dripping wetly down my legs.

I looked down at my hairless body, at my firm legs, my slim arms, my thin waist and my shapely breasts. I looked down at the juices spreading from my sex. Shaking uncontrollably, I looked up to see that She was gone. She had come close, too close, and as we became one, She had vanished, leaving naught but the faint ghost of a kiss on my lips.

I remember then waking up suddenly, still trembling violently, my body covered in sweat and my bed sheet covering the floor. Desperately, I reached down, feeling myself, and touched my groin. I sighed in relief. I was still male. I was still Erik.

After checking my bedside clock (It was around 2 a.m.), I went back to sleep, and dreamed no more.

I woke up around 9 a.m., feeling a little bleary, and glad that my first lecture was at 11 a.m. on Wednesdays. My other housemates were already gone, so I got up and went to take a shower in the utter silence of an abandoned student house. It felt good to wash, as I had forgotten to do so yesterday, and I relaxed under the hot jet of water for a good 20 minutes before remembering that this would affect the monthly bill.

Once cleaned, toweled and dressed, I went to the kitchen for breakfast. I served myself a bowl of cereal and glanced outside the window. Crap. It was raining. Again.

Sighing to myself, I finished the cereal and went back to my room to change quickly out of my jeans and yellow t-shirt. I then splashed myself with cold water from the tap, and felt myself once again going through the transformation. It was strange how I seemed to have gotten used to the process in only a few days.

Female again, I quickly chose a pair of light blue panties and matching bra to cover myself up. I may have been getting used to the change, but despite my curiosity for my own body, some part of me still was very uncomfortable spending time naked as a female. It may be my body, but it somehow felt like it wasn't truly mine, but rather that of someone else, and as such I didn't want to feel like I was disrespecting it or 'desecrating' it.

I then chose to wear a large white t-shirt with the word Kitty written on it. I would never have worn anything like it as a guy, but now I really thought that as a girl, I might as well wear something cute. The next step was choosing what to wear over my lower body. I was just picking up the skinny jeans I had worn the previous day, when I noticed a pretty bell skirt from my new stash of female clothes.

This made me hesitate. The very idea of wearing a skirt made me go red, and yet some part of me was imagining how good my slim legs would look in a nice dress, and how it would accentuate my waist... After all, it may be very feminine, but it certainly was beautiful. I shook my head, trying to clear it, and pulled on my jeans. What was I thinking? How could I, Eli... Erik, ever want to wear a skirt?

Nonetheless, once I had finally gotten ready with my socks, my ballet pumps, my heavy bag, and left the room, I looked back at where my stash of clothes was hidden, with the skirt lying atop of it. Maybe tomorrow...

The trip to the campus happened more smoothly today, as I had remembered to put my keys and money in my backpack, and retrieved some change right before getting onto the bus. I bought my ticket, thanked the driver, and hurried to find a seat, where I pulled my bag off my shoulders with an audible groan. Not very feminine, but then again my bag was heavy.

I wondered how other girls dealt with being this much weaker than men. Or was it just me who became excessively frail when I turned? I looked around and realized that every female in the bus wore a handbag far lighter and smaller than my backpack. How did they get all their things in there?

I glanced into my bag and started sorting through it. Sure enough, I was carrying a lot more weight than I needed. Perhaps, I thought, I might even be able to reduce the mass until I can fit it all into my very own handbag. I smiled at the idea, just as I felt some other part of myself shudder from some recess of my brain.

A few minutes later, I was in my lecture hall for thermal physics. The trip definitely had gotten a lot smoother this time, and whilst I had still felt like people had been staring at me, most of the embarrassment I had felt in my new identity had faded from my thoughts. I smiled shyly at Thomas as I came to sit next to him, and he beamed back, seemingly thrilled that I had chosen him as my neighbor for the lecture.

An hour later, we walked out into the sunlight. As Thomas and I spoke about the lecture we'd just attended, I hardly noticed that the light morning rain had stopped. We went to serve ourselves in the canteen and went on chatting. I was starting to realize that Thomas was actually a really nice guy, and though he liked to joke a lot and tease me, I didn't seem to mind. I might even say I was having a lot of fun with him.

As we were half way through our meal, I noticed Henry from the corner of my eye, standing on the other side of the mess hall and waving at me. I smiled at him and he beamed. It was hard to tell from this distance, but I had the distinct impression he was glancing back and forth between Thomas and I and winked. Unsure what to make of that, I turned my attention back to my new friend just as he embarked on another jocular anecdote.

It was only when we left that I realized that I hadn't seen Thomas's friends all day, and as we cleared up, I looked around wondering if I could locate them. I finally recognized them sitting at a nearby table, looking distinctly annoyed. I had the strange impression they were each taking turns to glance angrily at Thomas.

After lunch, I went to my second and last lecture, which seemed to fly by. I then decided to take the bus home.

"Are you going to run away again?" asked Thomas, "Or will you wait for me to catch the bus?"

"I don't mind taking the bus with you," I answered, smiling slightly at the memory of myself dashing from the lecture hall to the bus stop, nearly at a run, the previous evening.

We soon both found ourselves on the bus on our way to our respective houses, which are both located in the same residential area of town generally favored by students. I happily listened to Thomas chattering away as we sat waiting, feeling rather comforted to have this new friend, however talkative he seemed to become. We finally went our separate ways and I got off the bus at my stop, walking back home.

On the way back, I heard footsteps behind me, and glanced around to see a tall guy, about my age, walking behind me. He was unashamedly staring at me, and I progressively felt more and more self-conscious as I heard his footsteps follow me along the road. I tried walking faster, but his footsteps still seemed to be getting louder, and I started getting worried.

What did he want with me? I was now feeling very vulnerable in my slim, weak female body; hearing this guy who would usually have physically been my equal, now walk behind me, catching up with his longer legs. I knew he could do whatever he wanted to me in my current shape, and I was on the verge of panicking and sprinting my way back home.

I took in deep breaths, trying to control myself. I was only a few hundred feet from my house, and there was no reason to panic. What could a stranger possibly want with me? I couldn't possibly be at risk...

However, I did feel relief when I finally arrived in front of my house and walked up the steps to the front door. I looked around just in time to see the boy who had walked behind me smile shyly up at me as he went on past the house. I knew, when I saw that smile, that he hadn't meant to harm me in any way. Wondering whether I was becoming paranoid, I entered the house.

Inside, I found myself in the entrance hall, facing my housemate Mike who was staring at me from the sitting room. I felt myself paralyzed at this disastrous mistake. He had seen me! He would most definitely recognize me, and then people would know!

Strangely, he seemed just as paralyzed as I was, staring at me wide eyed in disbelief as I raked my brain for something to say. As we stood there facing each other like a couple of idiots, Henry walked into the sitting room from the kitchen and saw the both of us, gawking at each other.

"Hey, Mike, have you met Elise here? She's a friend of Erik and I!" He said, without missing a beat.

I still couldn't find anything to say... Who did Henry think he was fooling? It was obvious that I was Erik.

"Err..." Mike seemed to be in a mental lockdown. "I... I don't think I have. Hi, I'm Mike"

He jerkily started moving again, walking up to me and offering me his hand. I took in in utter disbelief. How could he not recognize me? It was incredibly weird being presented to my housemate as if I were a stranger.

Mike's eyes narrowed suddenly.

"Is... Isn't that Erik's bag?" he asked.

"Y-yes... Well, I... I..." My brain was working madly, trying to make up an excuse. "He asked me to carry it home for him whilst he attends a debating society event this afternoon!" I finally blurted out.

I cringed. It was a terrible excuse, as one has every right to keep ones' bag during debates, however formal they may be. Mike still seemed to be accepting the excuse though, nodding slowly. He looked rather funny, standing towering above me and nodding stupidly. I was still very unused to my smaller height as a girl.

"I'm sorry I didn't ring the doorbell," I added, trying to look apologetic whilst stifling a smile.

"No, no, don't worry," answered Mike, "You just surprised me that's all. I never knew Erik had friends who were so... So..." His voice trailed away.

I raised an eyebrow at him, starting to really enjoy the situation, and he blushed profusely. At that point, Beth, my third housemate, came down the stairs. Henry quickly introduced us, and she cautiously came to shake my hand. I didn't really know where to go from there, so Henry proposed that we all go to the pub for the afternoon.

It was a little early for the pub, but I knew that Henry, like me, thought it would be best if I were seen to spend as little time as possible in the house as a girl. The last thing I wanted was to betray the truth about Elise by acting too comfortably in my own home. I therefore said I would go, after which Mike quickly joined us, and Beth reluctantly agreed to come as well.

As we walked to the pub, I felt myself smiling. After all, I thought to myself, it didn't seem like my different appearance would affect my social life that much. Why not just act in the same way I usually do, remaining myself, and let other people assume I'm someone else based on my appearance?

This initially went well as we sat down in the pub and ordered some drinks. We quickly found ourselves joking and having fun, and I appreciated how agreeable Mike had become. Soon however, I started to feel a little fuzzy, and I realized that I was quickly getting drunk. It had been stupid of me to assume I could drink as much as usual: I was probably a good twenty kilograms lighter than usual... And yet I was only on my second or third drink!

Knowing this wouldn't end well, I simulated I sudden migraine and said I needed to go back home, apologizing profusely for leaving. Mike seemed to dislike the idea, and offered to accompany me home, but I refused, knowing that I couldn't have him follow me back to his own house. I insisted on leaving alone, and, after saying goodbye to my housemates, I left, leaving a rather forlorn Mike staring after me.

I quickly made my way back to the house, where I finally entered my room, got changed, and turned myself back into a guy. This sobered me up almost instantly, as my body mass increased. I then spent the next few hours or so watching the television. My housemates finally came back and greeted me, expressing surprise at my friend, Elise.

Mike and Beth eventually went to their rooms to work, and Henry joined me on the couch in the sitting room. I felt relieved that we had managed to keep my secret, but I felt a strange disconnection between the time when I was Elise and that where I am Erik. Acting out two people in real life before the same people was indescribably strange.

Neither Henry nor I said much during the rest of the evening. I knew he was just as disturbed by our peculiar type of acting as I was, and I didn't think either of us would want to talk about it just yet. After a couple of hours, however, Henry got up and headed towards his room, stopping at the sitting room door to turn to me.

"You know," he said, "I like Erik as a good housemate. But I also enjoy having Elise as a friend."

He left me there, pondering his words, unsure of how much I wanted Elise to permeate my personality.

October 16, 2014

I woke up around 8 a.m. today, and realized I'd have to rush to get ready for my first lecture at 9. I quickly got up, leapt into the shower and dried myself off, before grabbing a bowl of cereal from the kitchen to take to my room. I was quickly eating my cornflakes, wondering whether to wear a skirt or not, when looked outside I realized that it wasn't raining.

Strangely enough, this didn't make me feel the relief I would have expected during the previous days. Instead, I felt a mix of emotions twisting around in my gut. I knew I was a guy at heart, and looked forward to being able to act like a lad on campus, checking girls out and being raucous with my mates.

However, there was also something about being female which had it's own charm, although I couldn't put my finger on it. It would definitely be hard having to accept that Thomas simply wouldn't recognize me for one thing... But there was more to it than that. I wondered if, perhaps, I had been growing tired of acting the lad as of late.

Anyway, it didn't matter now. I quickly finished my cereal and got dressed in my loosest jeans and my favorite shirt, both feeling nostalgic, and weirdly uncomfortable with my bulgy appendage and large body mass. It was strange how quickly I had adapted to being female over the last few days.

The rest of the morning went pretty much as it always did. I rushed to catch my bus in time, got to the lecture just as it was about to start, and sat next to my usual group of mates. They seemed a little taken aback after seeing me reappear after a two day absence from lectures, but I told them I had been unwell and they let the subject drop.

We'd finished our morning lectures and were going to go picnic on the campus grounds (I needed to buy sandwiches as I'd yet again forgotten to make some) when I saw Thomas. He seemed strangely lonely and sad, walking with his usual friends, all of whom seemed to be trying to cheer him up as they went to the canteen. Feeling a pang of guild, I wondered whether he thought I'd abandoned him, but I quickly moved on with my mates.

Lunch was a cheery affair, with loads of crude jokes and funny discussions. It did feel slightly tiresome after a while though, and the others noticed my slightly wooden expression, but I told them I still felt a little queasy after the last few days. We then went on comparing girls and grading them, occasionally pointing one out as a reference as she walked by.

I was surprised to find that whilst I still appreciated looking at sexy birds, I was also feeling more and more aware of their clothes. I even caught myself imagining myself as Elise wearing their clothes a couple of times, thinking of how pretty I'd be in them. Those thoughts were weird though, and I desperately tried to clear my head.

However, during the next lecture, I was once again drawn to the clothes of the pretty girl next to whom I sat. My mates were all chatting in a whisper on my left, but all I could see were the cute little white pumps worn by the girl on my right, which were decorated by an elaborate pink motif which merged multiple mathematical symbols into a heart.

"Nice shoes." I thought to myself.

"Thank you!" The girl answered, smiling at me.

I hadn't noticed I had actually spoken under my breath, and glanced at her face quickly, feeling embarrassed. I noticed that she had long dark hair and a mildly tanned, even skin. She had plump little lips baring brilliantly white teeth, a cute little nose, and most startling of all, bright greens eyes. I felt myself going red.

"I'm sorry..." I said, "I... I didn't realize I was speaking out loud."

"I don't mind. So, do you study chemistry and physics to?"

"No, I do physics and math's."

"Oh darn... I need some help in organic chemistry."

"I'm always interested in organic and I seem to remember I wasn't too bad at it at A level... Perhaps I can help anyway?" I offered.

She quickly told me about her problem, which concerned carbonyl chemistry. Luckily, I had done a few extra projects on ketone reactions during my time at school, so I could solve the problem without too much difficulty. When she looked doubtful, I tried using thermal physics to demonstrate the thermodynamic likelihood of my reactive compounds doing what I said they would.

I'd nearly calculated the Gibb's free energy to prove the reaction would happen when I noticed that the lecturer had stopped talking and was staring up at me, looking annoyed. We'd obviously been making too much noise, and I smiled apologetically at the professor until he went back to his lecture. I glanced at my neighbor, who was smirking teasingly at me, before picking up the notes I'd written.

"I believe you," She whispered to me softly, "My name is Isabelle, by the way."

"I'm Erik," I said.

The rest of the lecture went on smoothly, and Isabelle and I continued chatting under our breaths. We seemed to be getting along very well, and I was sad to see her go when our lecture finished and she said she needed to go to her lecture about chemical spectroscopy. I left with my mates to work in the library for an hour, before going to our last lecture on statistics.