Thanks as ever goes to the other QTverse writers and in particular CorruptingPower for the encouragement and input, as well as letting me play in his sandbox. Also thanks for the reviews and comments from readers here. This is the last new girl that will be getting introduced for a bit since there's more than enough for Ethan to get to grips with for now :)
Relevant Cast List:
Team Knight
- Ethan Knight: A junior producer at the North England Broadcast Corporation and member of Project Upstart
- Nia Clarke-Mills: VP of Marketing at Averna Pharma, responsible for the PR of the Gemivax rollout
- Evie Kimura: Civil servant from the Department for Culture Media and Sport, permanently attached to support the NEBC and Project Upstart
- Farah Hassan: Former England Women's cricketer turned media personality, headhunted to be the face of Gemivax for Project Upstart
- Jessica (Jess) McNamara: An online artist and designer hired to help produce graphics and animations
Team Barclay
- Rhys Barclay: A former editor of a tabloid paper brought on to Project Upstart despite his dubious personality
- Dr Eleanor (Nell) Armstrong: A public health doctor working as a consultant with the NEBC, now assisting Project Upstart with the Gemivax rollout
Unaffiliated
- Aoife Ryan: the long suffering and increasingly burnt out head broadcast/studio engineer for the NEBC
- Alex McNamara: a programmer and coder who is matched with Team Barclay via the Delphi algorithm
25th October 2020
Alex sat on the bathroom tiles crying, the voices on the other side of the door so small and remote that they'd stopped making sense. Her hands wouldn't stop shaking. Her heart raced so hard it hurt. And every breath burned like hell, forcing her to work at every shallow, snatching gasp.
She'd had panic attacks enough times before and thought she knew what anxiety was like, but the wave that had come over her within moments of receiving the vaccine made those seem tiny by magnitudes. This almost felt physical. Something she could reach out and touch. A beast in black and carmine with jaws large enough to fit around her chest, trying to savage her into the ground.
It would be a lie to say that she hadn't had her misgivings before the injection. The blonde doctor, Eleanor, at least seemed nice. But every doubt and off vibe she had about Rhys had become more cacophonous with every moment in which the serum worked its way through her body. The sheer fucking wrongness of everything had wormed it's way into her skull, until the only thing she could think to do was run. Knowing the bathroom at least offered a door she could lock, that was where Alex had made her break, listening to the impulse to grab the doctor's laptop as she'd gone. If what she was hoping to find on the device was reassurance, what she'd gotten was the opposite and it now lay in the corner, smashed against the wall. Trashed, like everything else in the room, as she'd struggled to find any sort of outlet for what she was feeling.
But there wasn't one. No matter how much she screamed and cried and broke and lashed out, her heart pounded faster, the run spun harder and the panic built further. With her red hair drenched with sweat, Alex curled up on the floor, and prayed whatever this nightmare was would just fucking kill her already.
******
"Aaah for
fucks sake
!"
Aoife swore as she was jolted from her half-thoughts and the autopilot she'd been working on by a small, brief flash and the faintest plume of electrical smoke. Black scorches marred the circuit board in front of her, and it didn't take a genius to immediately realise that she'd managed to short it past the point of saving. If she was less worn out she might have had to fight the urge to throw her soldering iron across the room, but as it was she simply set it down, before slumping her beanie clad head onto the workbench to give a despairing whine.
The digital clock on the wall read 00:57, but time felt a little arbitrary in her basement workshop, beneath fluorescent tube lights that did their straining best to keep the space from slipping into complete darkness. The repair job on the sound mixing desk was meant to be a quick one, something she could knock out easily rather than taking on one of the more daunting pieces of satellite equipment Nat had left her with. Something she could have done before midnight to justify a few snatched hours with her eyes closed on the camp bed in the corner of the room. But she was long past the point where her exhaustion was purely physical, and even the easy jobs were taking her twice as long. And that was without stupid lapses in concentration leading to stray gestures frying the device she was trying to fix.
It crossed her mind that maybe she didn't have much left to give.
"I can't keep fucking doing this."
Despite the statement Aoife made herself move, as if forcing herself to keep going was the only thing stopping the last few threads holding her together from finally coming apart. She was forced to pick her way past several obstructing coils of outdoor cable, ordered as a back-up following the vandalism of the uplink, and reached the sets of shelves her predecessor had mounted to meticulously arrange all the documentation and manuals they might need. She knew there was a handbook for the sound desks there, which, even if it didn't offer a solution, would at least give her the part number to order a replacement.
Aoife hated how much of a ghost of herself she felt right now, carrying around feelings that had been building for a while until they'd started to get past the point where she could keep ignoring them. Across the room the blue light of her own PC monitor remained illuminated at her desk with a couple of basic diagnostics of some faulty camera drives running. They weren't the drives that kept wrestling with her attention however.
It was almost 72 hours since she'd dumped the contents of the encrypted drive for 'Project Upstart'. Stealing something like this definitely wasn't like her. Not the her she saw herself as anyway. Nor was sitting on it, almost obsessively refusing to delete the data despite the fact she seemed no closer to working out a password. But if there was even a glimmer of an answer to how trapped she was starting to feel, Aoife couldn't let it go, no matter how sick it all made her feel.
At least she was talking to Ethan again. Even if noticing how stubbornly raw her feelings had ended up becoming was another sign of how poorly she was coping. He was the one good thing in her life right now, but her reaction to him missing a movie night wasn't something she liked. She didn't want to build him up into something he couldn't be or to put all her needs on him. But then she wasn't sure what else she was left with.
Finding herself standing in front of one set of shelves without having noticed the last few steps towards it, Aoife realised she'd spaced out entirely for a moment, and gave her own face a soft slap. "Come on you fucking numpty. Focus."
She spotted the faded volume she was looking for, eventually, on the top shelf, half buried beneath a stack of folders and documentation that had been stashed away months ago, waiting hopefully for a point where someone might actually find the time to file them properly. Little chance of that happening. The hard part was straining her short frame up to get it down, something she only half succeeded in, retrieving the manual with an accompanying avalanche of papers and another loud string of curses. Aoife took a moment where she fought down the urge to simply give up for the day, finally stooping down to start dejectedly collecting things back up, before a glimpse at one caused her to stop.
The single photocopied sheet was a mixture of printed arial font and annotations in the careful hand writing of Tom Warrick, the genial Welshman who had been the NEBC's head producer at Taymont Hall. Guiltily, Aoife realised it had been weeks since she'd thought about him. As far as she was aware Tom still was officially in charge, but she'd not heard from him since he'd become another of the dozens of their staff who'd been rushed to hospital. She liked him, but at some point managing the concern for every single person they were no longer getting news about had become another task. One she didn't have the bandwidth to grapple with. And so that had got buried, unflatteringly, along with other luxuries like sleep and washing her hair.