Why had me thoughts of late been keeping me up nights, why could I not stop thinking about sex and why could I not keep my hands off myself? The answers to these questions were simple.
Whole afternoons would merge into a haze of self-pleasure. Having orgasm after orgasm letting my mind run away with me and not feeling the slightest bit of guilt about the fact that I had taken time off work to deal with some personal issues. If the office knew that my personal issues simply involved lying on my bed whilst having the most wonderful flashbacks to a night of sex that I could not forget, I'm fairly sure they'd have had a few words to say about it.
A particular fantasy had stuck in my head for months before and I had finally found an outlet. The dream had been for me to be taken by an older man someone who knew what they were doing, what they wanted. I was young at the age of twenty-three and had had little in the way of positive sexual experiences. Meeting men at clubs and bars, leading to drunken fumblings, inadequate sex, and swift, awkward goodbyes in the morning. I was desperate for something or someone to break the rut I was in and knew just the chap for the job.
James was in his forties and I can't place what it was about him that I wanted so badly. I had known him for a year and he was extremely charming, funny and sexy. The life and soul of the party with a witty story for every occasion. His eyes I think were what drew me to him. They were deep chocolate in colour and the kind of eyes you could swim in. The kind of eyes that no matter how long you looked into them you knew you would never know the thoughts behind them and never really understand the man. However the eyes screamed one thing to me and always had. They wanted me: He wanted me and I was more than happy for him to have me.