Conversations with My Mother

Conversations with my Mother - Chapter 8.

So many memories came flooding back to me. They came like waves on Bondi Beach, powerful, strong, pushing my heart this way and then that. Not stopping to give me time to appreciate them. Inside my head, I heard her last words, the words that stung and were full of hurt and bitterness. Full of disappointment and pain.

"Just Go, I don't want to hear any more, take your things and just leave. And don't you dare come back!"

Two proud women refusing to see the other's point of view. I stamped my foot, and my Mother glared at me, her arms folded. "Go on, just go!"

How I wish I could relive that day. The silly things I said. How I refused to see the hurt in her eyes. Why was loving another woman so wrong in her mind? Why oh why?

The tears fell and I sobbed, so hard, as I held her warm hand to my wet cheek, I kissed the hand that showed me how to make bread, how to sew a button on a shirt, the one she used to spank me when she caught me smoking. I kissed it not once nor twice but over and over. "Oh Mum, I am so, so sorry, please forgive me, please, please," I begged for her forgiveness. The sobbing became a flood of tears.

Amanda had her arm around me. She rested her head on my shoulder. I felt another arm around my waist and then a hand on my shoulder. My sobs were full of my own pain. I still loved my mother no matter what.

I heard words from my brothers, my sisters-in-law, and the many children. I felt their hands on my shoulder. I felt someone stroking my hair and telling me that she would.

I don't know how long I stayed there like that, it seemed like minutes, but it was a lot longer. When I opened my eyes, Amanda was still holding onto me. We were seated now next to her. My head resting on her bed.

My brothers stood next to me, their eyes wet, everyone was crying.

I heard the machine whirling away in the background for the first time, a steady beeping sound, telling us she was still with us.

The door to her room was ajar and the whispering I heard was coming from people on the other side of the door. I moved ever so slightly and Amanda turned to the door, Ken tapped her on the shoulder and whispered she was wanted.

She stood up and stretched, there was a face at the door and then it disappeared.

Colin and Ken were in a huddle with their wives, Ken came over to me kissed my cheek and informed me "The girls are going to feed the little ones, do you want something brought back from the canteen?"

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Going on to two," he replied "You should think about getting settled in at home, sis,"

"Not yet, I think Amanda has to wait until we are told it's OK or something. Do they do a decent coffee in the canteen here?"

He looked over his shoulder and asked, "If the coffee is any good, can you bring us all back cappuccino, please?"

I looked around and thought about our bodyguards. "They might like a coffee as well, my treat tell them," I pulled out my credit card and handed it to Brenda, who just looked at it and huffed at it.

Amanda walked back in followed by some doctors and nurses. The lead doctor was a tall handsome woman in her thirties I thought. She smiled at everyone and said hello.

"Good news everyone," She started off by addressing Ken but then included us all. "We are confident that we can take your mum off the machine in the next 24 hours. We will advise you beforehand as I am certain you will want to be here when she wakes,"

The sense of relief that filled me cannot be described.

The Doctor continued. "I don't want you to build your hopes up but we don't know what damage has been done just yet," She looked around at each of our faces.

Ken took charge and asked what all of us were thinking. "What's the worst-case scenario?"

"The absolute worst case is she doesn't wake up. BUT" As she emphasised the but, "We are more than certain she will. What we aren't certain of is the damage that's been done. She might have memory loss, a speech impediment, or loss of sight. She may not be able to move her limbs. We just don't know for certain. So we will ask you not to be too enthusiastic when she wakes. Let us get her comfortable and aware of her surroundings then you can see her,"

She looked around the room and continued to smile. "I am confident that whatever the situation is, you as a family will be able to handle it."

"Now we are going to do some minor tests so if you would all like to go for a coffee and give us an hour or so, then you can continue your vigil,"

As we all started to leave the room, Amanda caught hold of my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. She looked into my eyes, her eyes dark brown, but as bright and shining as the stars in the sky, she whispered to me, "God how I love you,"

"Hold that thought," I told her as we walked out the door to be met with a swarm of a new group of 'men in black' or in this case a woman in black.

I sighed, it was a deep sigh.

"Roberta, meet Celina, she is watching over us, the night shift so to speak," Amanda told me.

"Hi Celina," I held out my hand she took it held it firmly and gave it a gentle shake. She was my height, a Latino I suspected, with a beautiful smile and downright pretty to boot. Her hair pulled back into a tight bun and she looked stunning even dressed in the Secret Service uniform of a black suit, white shirt, and a thin black tie.

"Hello, Ms. King. It isn't just me, my team has all the bases covered. Have you told them?" She said looking at Amanda. She shook her head.

"Told us what?" I asked looking sternly at Mandy once more.

Celina took me to one side while the rest of the family were held in the corridor.

"The threat has gone to what we call a 'Code Blue'. The threat is imminent. We are holding you all here for the immediate future,"

"Hang on a sec, we have kids to worry about, they need feeding and they need their beds," I reminded her.

My brothers joined us as did the women, before too long we were surrounded by my family and around them a ring of black-suited armed secret service agents. Once again Ken took the lead.

"What's happened he asked looking at me and Amanda. Amanda put her hand on his shoulder and then whispered in his ear. "The threat has gone a level up, I think it would be safer for everyone if I put myself into the hands of the Australian Embassy staff and the Secret Service. Then you guys can look after both Bobbi and your Mum,"

Ken called both me and Colin over as well as the other women. He addressed us all including Celina.

"We are a family, I think it would be heartless to abandon Amanda and let her go through this bull shit on her own. Having said that, I am mindful of the kids." Then looking at Celina he asked, "Can I assume your organisation is looking into whomever has made this threat?"

Celina just smiled, neither confirming nor denying the assumption.

Ken told her "I'll take that as a yes. So with the increase of the threat you will have more personnel made available to you?"

"Yes, we will have sufficient personnel to ensure the FOA is safe,"

Bruce McLearn stood back taking a phone call. He didn't say too much other than "Yes Sir, Right away Sir,"

He then whispered to Celina, who stood away from the family group but was eyeing us off.

I kept hold of Amanda and told her, "Where you go I go,"

The look in her eyes said differently. "Don't bet on it, sweetheart,"

Bruce came over to us and said to me with a dead straight look on his face. "In a few minutes, Amanda is going to get a phone call. She is to go into protective custody as of now," It was a cold hard statement of fact.

And with that, her phone buzzed. She answered it with a firm, "Yes Prime Minister," She listened without saying a word. Then answered once more, "Yes Sir, right away Sir,"

Celina got a message in her earpiece and with a wave of her hand, a group of Secret Service agents took hold of my Amanda and whisked her away. Bruce stood next to me holding onto my arm. He told me, "She'll be safe and so will you guys,"

All of this took no more than 15 minutes since we had the discussion with the Doctors.