DIPSTICK
I have a passion, no you naughty lot, not just for that, no a passion for cars. In particular, sports cars, soft-tops, you now the type, old M.G's, MX-5's or Miata's as they're called in the States. I have been lucky enough over the years to own a number of such cars and have been very lucky in that Hubby is a total 'petrol-head' too. You know the type, fast bikes, fast cars and me, a fast woman! So it will come as no surprise that along with this passion for all things sports car, comes a knowledge of how to fix them. Yup, we all know that these little gems of the road do tend to leave you both exhilarated and frustrated often in equal amounts. Over the years I have been the spanner woman alongside, first my Dad, then Hubby, fixing bits n bobs on my cars in the rain and wee small hours of the night. It's good to know what's what and at least have some working knowledge of what's going on or to at least know when the car doesn't sound or feel quite right.
So fast-forward to last month. My beloved little Mazda had or felt like it was developing a rather clunky bum. I know it's hardly an F1 drivers description to his mechanic, but I knew she wasn't quite right..
"Hey!" I shouted to Hubby as he cut kindling in the wood shed, "She's got a bit of a knocking from the rear; I think it could be a drop link?" I added, half questioning, half feeling knowledgeable.
I heard the axe drop onto the pile of cut wood and Hubby strolled out, jeans covered in wood shavings and bark.
"Very good," he smiled, hands on hips as he looked at 'Daisy'. Didn't I tell you, I always, but always name a car, it's a girl thing, or maybe it's just 'a me' thing? Who knows....
"Side?" he questioned.
I stopped looking so professional and instead went for vulnerable but cute. Index finger on lips in mock thought I grinned,
"Nearside?"
"So the passenger side he checked?"
before kneeling on the gravel, hand on the rear wing and looking up at me with a broad grin.
"Nope," I laughed, "My side."
And raised my hands up in mock 'who knows' gesture.
"O.k.," He smiled getting up once more to move sides. "That'll be the offside then?" he questioned.
"Oh yes, definitely the offside," I laughed as he dipped his head and shoulders below the wing and looked around.
After a few minutes of looking, rear wing bouncing and huffing, Hubby concluded that after a cursory inspection he could see nothing loose or broken.
"Drop it down to Ken's this afternoon," he suggested, wiping dirt from his hands as he moved to give me a kiss.
Hubby gives kisses that melt me every time and the years haven't diminished their passion, I took it full and with some passion, savouring the moment. I smiled a content feeling filling me, as he went back to the wood shed and relentlessly boring tasks of wood cutting, before I headed to the kitchen.
Ken's is our local garage, it's a rough and ready, fix anything sort of place where he, Ken, is always happy to fix anything from trucks and cars to farm machinery and trailers. He has a grumpy but appealing character and once past his gruff exterior, usually only presented to tourists, he's a gem and a gentleman. He has on occasions, younger mechanics, some from the local college on work placements and some just trying their hand at making a few quid. Most don't stop long as Ken is a real stickler for doing things the 'ken way'. There's also no point in taking your car there if you need it back in a hurry. Even a simple job can take a day or two, if Ken is in the mood and longer if he's not. We learnt this years ago and now refer to when a car will be back as 'Ken time'.
So later that afternoon I found myself pulling into Ken's yard to be greeted by a couple of old dogs, a number of chickens and rabbits and Ken, who looked strangely happy to see me, as I stepped out of Daisy. Now it might have been my very short denim shorts or my vest top which, I have to admit, was struggling to hold my rather ample boobs in and was showing a lot of push-up bra, but he smiled and even gave me a wave from the door of his office.
"Nice to see a lady with her top down," He cheekily smiled, before pointing towards Daisy, sans roof. "I'm just popping out," He added, looking directly at my boobs as I walked towards him, "But Danny here, will sort you out." He added, gesturing towards a skinny twenty something wearing clean blue overalls and Oakley baseball cap, hunched over the engine bay of a BMW.
With that Ken, turned and stepped back into the dark doorway of his office, glancing back this time at my legs as I headed for the one called Danny.
"Hi Danny," I smiled holding out a hand, "I'm Jo and my Daisy has a poorly bum."
There was, I guess no reasonable reason why he would get what the hell I was on about, but he smiled back, eyed up my tits through his glasses, as had his boss, and wiping his hands on his clean overalls, took my outstretched hand in his and held it. He held it a little longer than I felt was polite, but then he was young and probably not used to greeting customers. I wriggled my hand free, still trying to smile and maintain a happy appearance as I pointed towards the rear of Daisy.
"I think it could be a suspension bush," I suggested, raising an eyebrow, hoping for agreement, none came.
Instead Danny eyes dropped, stone like into my cleavage. Now Danny was not much taller than me, but his height advantage gave him a near perfect view of my bulging tits, and he clearly was enjoying it.
"Eyes, Danny, Eyes," I snapped, clicking my fingers like a teacher, "My eyes are up here" I added, pointing towards my face, just to make sure he knew he was caught.
He jumped and spun on the spot, before heading towards the car at a pace. I smiled broadly behind his back shaking my head in mock disbelief.
Danny hoped into Daisy and fumbling around the steering column finally realised that I was stood only feet away dangling the keys from the tip of a long red finger nailed finger.
"You might need these Danny," I suggested, smiling widely.
Danny didn't speak; he held out a hand and accepted them, before starting her up, spinning her wheels on the gravel and darting into the inspection bay, clanking her over the ramps and stopping her rather abruptly.
Before I had even managed to enter the bay, Danny had leaped out and was lifting Daisy up, the ramps clanging and rattling as up she went. Once at just above head height, well Danny head height, the ramps stopped. Still without uttering a word, he disappeared, fumbling about in a corner of the workshop before reappearing, untwisting the long cable of an inspection lamp. Lamp on, Danny still not acknowledging my presence, headed underneath the car.