There Must Be a Mistae

Note: All persons used in this novel are fictitious. Although the areas used in this novel are real, the streets, buildings, roadways, recreational areas, and other points of interest used to make this interesting reading for you, are neither at the exact heights, or in the location described. If you are looking for a great deal of explicit sexual activity, this is not the story for you. With the exclusion of certain scenes, this story could easily have a fit into the category of "NON-EROTIC" as easily as it will fit into a Novel or Novella. Again, please remember, 'THIS IS A NOVEL.'

CHAPTER 7

***If you read the disclaimer above, you will notice something is missing. I had predicted this would be a SHORT STORY: 5 CHAPTERS LONG. When I passed that mark I informed you I lied, and said it would be over by CHAPTER 8. It appears I have lied again. I have lost control of this story. I am just going to let it run its course. I am going to let it go where it wants to go, for however long it wants to go there, without changing the title, or worrying about its length. This is Chapter 7. Chapter 8 is nearly finished and I have to hold both chapters back, because I posted Chapter 6 three days ago. My mind is running amok with how these people are acting and reacting to one another. The words are just flowing onto the computer, like water over Niagara Falls. I pray it does not reach 29 Chapters, as my last effort did, but I have nothing better to do with my time than to write. If it is not for this story, it will be for another one, which has not come to me in my 'dream state' as of yet. So without wasting any more of your time, here is the CHAPTER 7. I hope you enjoy it.

28. Even, Jennifer and GORDON.

I parked the car at the side entrance to the hotel. Gordon and I walked in looking for my ill-tempered fiancée. We saw her pacing back and forth near the front entrance waiting for us to arrive. As she walked closer to the front we took a seat halfway there.

I said to my son, "Let's sit here, and see how long it takes mommy to see us; when she does be prepared to run."

Jennifer walked by us three times. On the fourth time she stopped directly in front of us. She turned slowly, with fire in her eyes, but she did not speak to me, she spoke to her son.

"How long have you been sitting there Gordon?"

Gordon did not lie, but he did not tell the whole truth either. "A long time mommy, I did not see a clock."

"Honey, unless you want to get blood all over your new clothes, which make you look very handsome, move away from your father."

"Thank you mommy; dad bought theses clothes for me a little while ago. I hated the clothes I was wearing. They are always plaid, and I hate plaid."

He was distracting her, which was very good for me.

"Why didn't you say something to me if you didn't like plaid?"

"I didn't want to hurt your feelings. You seem to like plaid."

"All little children wear plaid, Gordon."

"Most little children look like dorks, because their parents dress them that way. I want to look like dad."

Jennifer looked at me and noticed the difference in my clothing.

"What the heck happened to you today? You are dressed differently. I'm still going to kill you, but you look very handsome."

"If you are going to kill me, I will take the Fifth Amendment on my apparel. I don't have to answer your question on the grounds you are going to hurt me."

"Trust me; I am going to hurt you Even. You will never do this to me again."

"It was not our fault. Speak with your grandmother. If she gave us an exact time, instead of giving me a generalized time, we would have been here waiting for you. Isn't that correct Gordon?"

"That's right dad, we would not have stopped at Wendy's if we knew mom was waiting for us."

"You two have eaten already? I am starving, and you two have eaten?"

"Son, should we take mom for Buffalo Wings?"

Gordon laughed. "I bet mommy doesn't know that Buffaloes fly."

"Very funny Gordon, you are getting very close to a spanking."

I stood up from the comfortable lounge chair, and approached my fiancée carefully. I trapped her arms by her side, and kissed her gently.

"You are a bastard Even Luck."

"I can't be I know both my parents."

"Wise-ass, I'm going to spank you tomorrow night."

"You owe the pretzel jar $10, doesn't she"?

"Yes she does Dad. I think you're going to need a larger jar. I don't think anyone's going to win."

"I already know who's going to win."

"Everyone keeps saying bad words, who could possibly win?"

"Think about it; who is the one person in our house who has not said one bad word."

Gordon tapped his foot for a second, and then his eyes lit up.

"It's me; I haven't said a bad word."

"That's right, and if you don't say a bad word before Wednesday night, you win all the money."

"Mommy, I'm going to be rich. There's a ton of money in that jar, plus two $100 bills underneath it."

"What are you going to do with all that money, dear?"

"I'm going to invest it in penny stocks."

I looked at my son and smiled. "Gordon most children your age would say they are going to buy candy, baseball cards, or a computer game. You are going to buy stocks. You are an amazing young man."

"I know."

"Delicious said that one day a girl is going to kill him because of the way he answers her questions. I'm beginning to agree with her."

"You have only known him for a few weeks. He has been answering questions that way for more than three years. You will get used to it, I have."

"It's a beautiful day outside, why don't we take him to the amusement park. I'll take you into the tunnel of love, and see if your breasts are really in front."

"Liar, you are not going to touch me until tomorrow, and you know it. You get my hopes up, and then you dash them to the ground. You are evil Even Luck. After tomorrow, when you promise me something you had better deliver."

"Rod said this morning that nine months and one day after we get married I am going to be the father of three children. Apparently, I am going to deliver tomorrow night."

"Speaking of your attorney, did you find out everything you needed to know this morning?"

"Yes I did. Let's get you something to eat. I will tell both of you how and why it happened."

"Buffalo wings or do I get real food. You haven't wined or dined me, yet."

"It's a little early for a candlelight dinner, but if you're willing, so am I."

"I am told there is a very nice restaurant on top of this building."

"I seem to remember that also. Let's get the little one and go upstairs."

I looked towards Gordon to tell him to join us, and I said, "Oh hell, here come Delicious and Gray. Let's get in the elevator in a hurry. I don't want company; I don't think they do either."

As we rushed into the elevator Jennifer asked, "Is daddy growing up?"

"He's trying his best. I talked with her this morning. I told her I trusted her judgment, and to let her conscience be her guide. She told me she loved me, and I said I loved her too. Then we sat down and watched Gordon make a big mess of his waffles. Didn't you Gordon?"

"The waffle was big, and my mouth is small. The syrup gets all over me before I can get it all in."

"That's why we have soap and water. It not only cleans up little boys and girls, but big boys and girls too."

*******

At the entrance to the restaurant I told the host I wanted her to seat us as far away from the other guests as possible. I wanted the area darkened. A bottle of their best champagne, champagne flutes, crystal glasses, crisp linens, and candles at our table. I handed her $500 and asked her to tell the staff to give my fiancée the royal treatment.

Servers, who were dressed in their casual afternoon attire, changed into their formal eveningwear to serve us. The table linens were changed, and everything I asked for was placed at our table.

We were directed to our seats. Gordon jumped into his booster, and the server placed a linen napkin on his lap. I sat next to him, and Jennifer sat across from both of us.

"I am not used to such luxury. Gordon normally dominates my meal to the point I cannot enjoy it."

I looked at my little man and smiled. "Son did we didn't have any problem at Wendy's, did we? I ate my meal, and you ate yours. I thought we did splendidly together?"

"Yes we did dad. Mommy always fusses over me. She will not leave me alone. If I bite my hamburger, she has to wipe my face clean every time I get mustard on it. If she would wait until I finish, she could wipe it all at once. When I get to my French fries, she is worse. After each one, she wipes the Ketchup off my face. She is afraid someone is going to take a picture of me at any moment and doesn't want me to look messy. I can't say anything, because I don't want to upset her. She is a woman, and she cries easily."

It took everything I had not to laugh; I mean everything. I looked at Jennifer and she was about to cry.

"Do you see what I mean dad. I told the truth and mommy is getting ready to cry. I think you should sit by her until she feels better."

"Who holds mommy when she cries Gordon?"

"I do."

"Shouldn't you do it now so she feels better?"

"Okay."

Instead of climbing over me to get to his mother, he slid out of his seat, under the table, and came up the other side.

"Mommy, I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. You can hold on to me until you feel better."

Jennifer did just that. She took him in her arms and nearly crushed him to her chest. "I'm sorry I'm such a pest. I do want you to look handsome all the time. I'll try to do better from now on."

"Don't feel bad if you can't; I will understand."

"Are you sure you're not older than I am Gordon?"

"I can't be you're my mommy."

"I know I was there when you were born."

"So was I."

Feigning anger, Jennifer said, "Go back to your father, before I spank you mister."

"What did I say that was wrong? Were we both there?"

"Yes we were both there, but I was the one who was in pain."

Gordon was about to say something when I stopped him.

"Not another word young man; I know what you are thinking, but if you say it, I will not be able to save you from that spanking. Delicious is rubbing off on you, and that is not a good thing for a boy your age."

"She is my sister, sort of, and she is a lot of fun; except for the bad words."

"Yes she is a lot of fun. Did you see the pictures of her buried under whipped cream?"

"No I didn't. Did she eat it all?"

"There was so much of it that she and all of Rods children couldn't eat it all."

"Wow that was a lot whipped cream."

The server came and handed us our menus. He also brought out a chilled bottle of Cristal buried in ice. I asked him not to open it until dinner was served. Gordon ordered a chocolate milkshake, but Jennifer said 'No.' I told the waiter to make it a large adult size.

"You are going to spoil him."

"I certainly hope so. I've waited all my life for this moment, and I am going to take full advantage of it."

"You don't have to do it in one day Even. We are going to have a long life together."

"I thought you were going to kill me?"

"That decision is on hold, temporarily."

"Is it on hold temporarily, until you see how I perform in bed, or is it on hold until you get pregnant?"

"Pregnant, then I get all your money."

"I haven't changed my Will or my insurance policies yet. Pregnant or not, you don't get a penny. When I change everything I could have Rod be my executor, and take care of all my money, until Gordon and my new child come of age. He would split it evenly between the children and leave you out cold."

"You forget dear I have my own money to fall back on."

"Yes, but it will be comforting for me to know, as I lie in my grave next to my sister, that my children have access to my $1 billion and not my wife."

"You are a billionaire; since when?"

"Rod told me this morning. Apparently I crossed over that threshold last evening, when I found out your breasts were in front."

"Isn't that where women's breasts have always been dad?"

"Yes my son, but I used it as part of a joke I told last night at the dinner party, because Rod was making fun of me."

"Was it funny?"

"Yes, it was funny."

"Good."

"What would you like for dinner Gordon?"

"My milkshake, we just ate at Wendy's."

"Excellent choice, you can have something light to eat later this evening before you go to bed."

"What would madam like to have?"

"I believe I will have the prawns."

"If you are sick tomorrow we are still getting married."

"Why, what would you prefer I have Doctor Luck?"

"A safer dish for this evening would be the rack of lamb, veal chops, or tenderloin of beef. However, eat whatever you wish, we will get married, but you will not have sex tomorrow night, because you may be throwing up, due to tainted seafood."

"Cover your ears Gordon."

"You still have to put $10 in the pretzel jar. We have an honor system."

"We do?"

"Yes mommy, even if no one's around and you say a bad word you have to put the money in the jar. It is a matter of honor."

"Who made up that ridiculous rule?"

"Daddy did. Delicious put money in the jar when dad wasn't there, because of the rule."

"That's very commendable; now cover your ears."

I watched Gordon cover his ears and as he did I said, "I love you Jennifer."

"Fuck off Even, I can't even order what I want for dinner."

"Of course you can, just be advised if you are sick you don't get laid."

"I have been waiting four years to get fucked again, and you are going to withhold services, because I may be sick. What kind of man are you Even Luck?"

"I am the kind of man that doesn't want to get vomited on, especially on his wedding night."

"You are a real asshole Even."

I tapped Gordon on his head and he uncovered his ears.

"Mommy you owe the cookie jar $30 for three bad words."

Jennifer asked me, "Why do we bother having him cover his ears?"

"I didn't hear you mommy, I read your lips."

This time I could not hold it in. I roared with laughter. Was there anything my little boy could not do? I was going to take him to the Board of Education and have them test him out of Elementary, and High school. They would be a waste of his time, and talents. I would have my professors at MIT send him curriculum tests to see how advanced he was. I did not know if they ever had declared a Doctorate of Mathematics on a boy as young as five years old, but I believe they were looking at one now. How could one man get so lucky? If the stars were appropriately aligned, Monday morning I would have a pregnant wife. I already had two children, who could compete with Einstein in the brain department. My sister told me to reach for the stars; I was already well on my way.

Delicious and Gray walked into the restaurant and sat at a booth well to the right of us. They sat together, and I could see them plainly. I tried to ignore them but it was impossible.

Jennifer looked at them, because she saw my eyes drifting that way.

"Keep your eyes on me daddy."

"If you don't ask for the impossible, neither will I. She is my baby. I won't interfere, but don't ask me not to worry."

"Do you want me to say hello to them daddy?"

"That is the last thing I want you to do. They need their privacy, let them have it."

Then Gray kissed her and I nearly bent the silverware in half. It wasn't as bad as when she kissed him back. I said a silent prayer hoping to survive the evening when the server returned.

I said, "Someone has just entered the restaurant I do not wish to see. Do you have a privacy screen?"

"Yes sir I'll bring it right out."

He set it up so we were blocked from the entire restaurant. We were in a cocoon all our own.

Jennifer asked, "Who do you think is happier now, Delicious, or you?"

"I believe it's both of us. I will live through dinner, and she will enjoy her date. She is 17 years old, and I believe that was her real first kiss. I hope she enjoyed it."

"A girl always remembers her first kiss. She will always be able to tell you who, where, when, how, and why."

"I remember mine."

"A man never remembers his. Their brains are not wired that way."

"Do you want to cover your ears Gordon, or is it just a waste of time?"

"If you don't want me to know what mommy says, I have to cover my eyes and my ears."

"Do you have four hands Gordon?"

"No I only have two."

"In that case you are going to hear mommy say a bad word."

"My first kiss was a week ago Thursday, at a large house outside Fairbanks Alaska. Her name was Jennifer Stars. I am marrying her tomorrow. Gordon Stars is going to be my son."

"You are a real prick Even."

"Go ahead Gordon."

"That will cost you $10 mommy. That brings your total to $40."

"I don't need a calculator when I have my son with me."

"You don't need a computer when you have your son with you."

**********

Dinner was served. Jennifer decided on the tenderloin of beef, I had the petite filet and Gordon sipped on his chocolate milkshake. All was right with the world, although I desperately wanted to see what was happening on the other side of that privacy screen.

The waiter poured our champagne and I toasted my beautiful fiancée, and son. I gave Gordon a little sip of my champagne, and he almost lost Wednesday night's winnings because of it.

"Dad that taste like..." He covered his mouth with his hand before he could say it.

"Gordon, this champagne costs $300 per bottle. Many people think the same way you do, and they say it out loud."

"How can something that bad cost so much?"

"Many people believe this is the best champagne in the world, and they are willing to pay that much money for it. This is a special occasion for your mother and me, and I am willing to pay for it. Next time your mother gets a Diet Coke."

"Can I get another milkshake?"

"I think I'll buy a milkshake machine for our home. How does that sound?"

"I don't like the look on mommy's face."

"Don't worry about mommy's face. We are men; we know how to handle our women."

"Bullshit."

"Mommy you are going to fill up the pretzel jar all by yourself. That is $50."

"I think you should come home with me again tonight Gordon. I don't like the look on your mommy's face either."

"Doctor Even Luck there is a brain inside that head of yours; and you are finally using it."

While I had her undivided attention I told her the story about my sister and me; and how Delicious was conceived. I told her the entire story, from the beginning, and why Divine was unwilling to move to Denver. When I finished there were tears in Jennifer's eyes.

I asked her not to cry for any of us, because Delicious and I had come to terms with it. It was not Divine's fault. It was not Julius' fault, and it was not my fault. It was my father's fault for being such an intractable monster all his life. He never let anyone else's opinions or feelings get in his way. He ran everyone's life his way and ruined them in the process. As Divine said in her diary, I was the lucky one, because I escaped.

We finished eating, and I paid the bill leaving a handsome tip for those who served us. The trick now was to leave the restaurant without being spotted by my daughter. Jennifer and I did a wonderful job of not looking in their direction, but the little one with us waved at her. It was the first time I wanted to kill him. He was only four years old, and you don't kill a child for breaking the rules of protocol.

***********

We went to the amusement park, to let Gordon have some fun. We ran into a problem immediately. He was too small to go on some rides alone.

I was too tall to fit on them. This left Jennifer in a conundrum: Was she going to be the good mommy, or the bad mommy?