Dormant Passions

Waiting to pay my dinner bill, I had nothing much to do but people watch. My tired eyes, after six and half hours of driving were being refreshed by the soothing sight of the young and old, families and couples ambling in and out of the restaurant. Most of them looked happy or at least satisfied with something discernible even behind masks. So was I. I had accomplished something on my latest trip to negotiate a deal in the city of Hopewell, more than twelve hours away from home that I was forced to drive to, due to the prevailing pandemic conditions.

A little cheerful boy of about five and an old couple, strolled in burdened by some shopping bags. A young smashingly good-looking couple walked out, arm in arm and laughing. Two executive-looking men in tuxedos walked past briskly and behind them a woman in a red skirt hurried in.

All happy scenes to absorb for someone who had not much to do with society recently. Women would naturally attract more attention and I couldn't help notice the lovely sway of the full hips under that crimson skirt of apparent flimsy texture. I watched her as she was led to a table at the furthest end of the room where I was separated by only two tables; again, prompted by the restriction imposed by the city for this horrible COVID-19 crisis.

We were in the middle of 2021 and though some controls were a bit relaxed, people in this town were all masked and fully compliant. Being one that was a butt fan, I couldn't help notice the woman being walked to her table. She had short black hair and was of moderate height and what was seen of her legs was shapely. The combination of her curvaceous hips and her gait were what drew my attention. She was sexy!

She sat at a two-seat table like mine and faced me and even from the distance of a few yards our eyes met. A shock of hair fell over her left eyebrow and she still had her mask on for me to see anything more. I believe her gaze dwelt on my unmasked face for more than I would have expected then she looked down and never looked in my direction after.

The waitress brought my bill and I paid. Then I noticed that the woman across the room had taken off her mask as she placed her order. Oh, my god! That was Fay!

I kept staring at her features to see if I was mistaken. The more I looked and the more she made her movements with facial expressions, the more I was convinced that I was right!

For a couple of seconds, I was fascinated by the human brain and its ability to zoom in on identity based on recognition of anatomy and movement in synchrony. I noted those hips, wide and rounded, and then the motion that coupled to give rise to a four-dimensional image to hint at a recognition. I didn't decipher immediately but did so pretty quickly.

I had to talk to her. It's been a while. I also had time. What was she doing here? Her home was more than two hours away south.

I put on my mask and took those now memorable steps to her table.

My "Hi!" was met with a hesitant similar greeting sans emotion. I took off my mask and those dark gray eyes squinted, focussed and then shone with the genuine joy of recognition.

"Randy!" She stood up with open arms. I stepped up to her and took her into my arms.

"Oh, Fay! What a surprise." We hugged tight as we rocked side to side with affection and memories. My rather mundane stop over was suddenly transformed into an array of possibilities; some of them laced with exciting sensual thoughts. I liked this woman a lot.

"What are you doing here? Sit down. Have you eaten?" I pulled the chair opposite her and we sat down.

"Yes, I had a bite. Thanks. I am just driving by and stopped for the night. I had to drive to Hopewell for business. What are

you

doing here?"

"I am sorry to hear about Liza." She placed a hand on mine. "So very sorry." Her eyes and face displayed honest sympathy. Liza was my thirty-four-year-old wife that had died of breast cancer eight months prior.

"Thank you very much." I placed my other hand on top of hers and felt her softness. I moved a finger gently to feel the smoothness that hadn't gone away since I last knew it several years ago. "We are both single now." I smiled at her looking for a reaction but she simply smiled back. "So, what brings you here?" I repeated my query.

"Oh, I was visiting my aunt in a seniors' home in Blue Creek. Do you remember aunt Zahra?"

"Yes, I do. She looked after you when you were a kid."

"That's right. She had a couple of strokes and is being cared for at the Silver Oaks." She looked at me searching for something. I couldn't tell what it was. We did have a past association. Maybe she was thinking of that. "How have you been doing? How is Tessie?"

"Tessie is in boarding school close to her grand parents. Yeah, I am doing fine. Getting on as best as I can. "I squeezed her hand. "I think of you a lot." I looked at her with the admiration that I always had.

"I think of you too."

"Do you? You sound, eh kind of, dismissive when I message you. I sometimes think I am bothering you to respond and I force myself to hold back." I did feel that Fay didn't want to get close to me for some reason.

"No, I promptly respond to you and your messages have always been special to me." She held my gaze but looked away after a few seconds. "How can I, after that night?"

'That night' was special although it was years ago. Somehow, I did not see myself accepting her side of reciprocation as being a hundred percent honest. "True. I would believe that except that each time I wrote, you always sounded busy or somehow wanted to end the conversation. You always left me thinking that I shouldn't persist."

"Randy, you had a wife. I needed to remember that."

"Yes, but you were the same even after Liza passed."

"Really? But how could I change abruptly like that?" Her expression changed as she smiled brightly. "Anyway, forget it now. Let's enjoy our meeting. I have to leave soon. I have at least a two hour's drive."

The opportunity flashed into my brain and I wasn't going to let that go. "Do you have to go? Can you not go tomorrow?"

She looked at me and bit her lower lip in thought. "No, I think I must go. I got to get to my Salon tomorrow. And the kid..."

"Come on, I am sure you can organize that." I was asking with all sincerity.

Fay cleverly changed the topic. There you go again, I thought.

We walked down memory lane and quite literally down Crosswood Crescent where we spent our early years. It was in her childhood and youth that I became her close friend in the same neighbourhood. Our families lived almost exactly opposite each other on the same street where adolescence and early adulthood kept us as very adjacent. Our friends down the street, the playground where we spent a lot of time, birthday parties and the odd trip to someplace with others were all revisited with warm nostalgia. Many of the families moved out with fond farewells and new ones moved in. But our families stayed put. When we got older and studies and exams got the better of us, Fay and I even did class projects together. We went to the same college in the city, both of us deciding to stay at home, with me doing business studies and she taking up life sciences. We still were good friends but admittedly my maleness was breaking through our platonic association. I was attracted to Fay in a very strong way. She was my ideal girl and all her feminine attributes stood out and made her look the perfect female avatar. As we got into the late teens, physiological changes alter our outlook and relationships. Fay was filling up delightfully into her feminine shape and prominent among her physical assets was her derriere. She oozed sexiness from her backside so much that I actually became a butt fan all because of her. Not that she was unattractive otherwise. She had a cute face, sharp nose, sparkling dark gray eyes with full lips and her boobs were shapely and proportionate but her hips were another level of feminine beauty accentuated by her narrow waist above.

I tried my luck again. "Why don't you stay and leave in the morning?"

She put her elbow on the table and her hand supported her chin as she did some thinking. The sandwich and juice that she had ordered arrived and I let her eat.

Fay, whose real name was Faiza, was a very clever, motivated and versatile woman. She graduated, qualified in nursing as a newly married woman and after few years in the local hospital she further qualified as a physio and massage therapist. Meanwhile, she had a daughter, Greta. Her husband passed away during overseas service with the forces. She then surprisingly moved onto cosmetology where she very rapidly opened her second salon in the other end of the city and was a very successful entrepreneur employing twenty-seven staff

It was those dammed up hormones that led to the happenings 'that night'. As I watched the sandwich disappear between her full lips, I remembered the backdrop of time. One day when she was just twenty-one and I a few months younger still twenty, she walked up to me as we trudged home getting off the bus from college.

"Look, this may surprise you, but I am getting married!"

That hit me between the eyes and ripped through my young heart. My knees buckled and my eyes filled up. "What?" I whisper yelled. "To whom? When?"

"It's nobody you know. He's in the army. Why are you getting so worked up?"

"Oh, my god! You don't know that I am crazy about you?" That sounded so immature and inadequate in the circumstances. I did calm down as Fay explained to me her own family's conservative and traditional ways and the man she was marrying, Rauf, was a son of a family friend and their kith and kind found them to be a good fit. I didn't argue with her too much on how one marries someone that one knows so little about.

Then 'that night' happened!

While those memories played in my mind with a mixture of nostalgic sadness and embarrassment of immature, crude, post teens eagerness, I hauled myself back to the present where there was an opportunity to spend an evening with this beautiful woman who was my closest and dearest friend years ago. I was reasonably certain that she liked me too, but her affection did not cross into the romantic realm.

Besides, I didn't know if she was seeing anybody at that moment.

Still munching her sandwich, she asked: "What do you plan to do? Anything interesting?" If I was going to be honest I would say I wanted to get her into a romantic mood and consummate the unfulfilled desires within me to devour her sexy contours squeezing every drop of passion from me. I need to know if she was still available.

"I don't know. We could chat; catch up. So much has happened. See a movie or drive around, may be." I shrugged benignly. "Are you dating anyone now?" It was a bold question.

"No. I am alone." That was as straight an answer and was a huge relief. "I think I must get back There's loads to do." She contemplated the thought again. "Let me see. I'll make a few phone calls to my staff and associates. Need to talk to Greta too."

I thought I'll let her do that by herself. I left her to go to the foyer and look at something to do in the city at night. I should be prepared if she decides to stay. I sat on the sofa next to the reception while glancing through the flyers and brochures. We could party at a club, go to the movies, drive around aimlessly or sit by the lakeside. I thought I'll give Fay the choices. I checked my office email and Sheena, my secretary had sent me the usual updates with one message from my local customer, Terry Landsbridge to inquire where I was. She didn't say much more and I didn't want to mix business with pleasure by calling Terry to see if he had any orders for me.

Just to be safe and be prepared if it was required, I checked at the reception if there were any rooms available for her. I had mixed feelings when I heard that there were none, but I heard I could be considered if there were cancelations; pretty standard hotel clerk statement.

I walked back into the restaurant and found her still on the phone. She gestured to the chair and I seated myself and waited patiently as she talked animatedly to someone called Jill. When she said bye and smiled, I had hopes.

"I managed to talk to the girl at one salon and also cancelled a basement insulation job by a handyman. But I need to get to Shelley who had the schedule to cancel an appointment for a longstanding regular client. I guess I can try to do that later. I also spoke to Greta and she was happy to stay on with her friend." She looked at me with those expressive eyes and I almost swooned. "So, what's the plan?"

I asked her if she was staying and she nodded unexcitedly. I gave her the options.

"Let's just drive around and park by the lake with a coffee or something."

"Sounds brilliant." I couldn't conceal my excitement.

"Where do I stay? I can try the Silver Oaks. They have some guest rooms."

I needed to take a deep breath and gather all the gumption in me to say: "Why don't you stay here?"

"Is there a room available?"

"No. You can stay with me!" I am not sure how that came across but apparently not too badly.

She said nothing for a while. "Let's go for that drive; a long one."

We walked quietly to my Hyundai Santa Fe and drove out without saying a word. I knew the country road parallel to the lake and took it at a leisurely pace.

"That night when you came home, what were you thinking?" That came out of the blue from her.

In the circumstances that prevailed and coincidentally, we both lived with our parents through college that was situated in the same city. It was a few days before her wedding and from my room upstairs I saw her parents, all dressed up, driving out. At six in the evening, they were possibly going out for dinner. "I called you and asked if I could come over. I was a frequent visitor to your home but never at night and rarely when you were alone. You were hesitant, but when I told you that I wanted to bid you a personal farewell, you agreed." It also helped when I heard that her parents had gone out of town for a party with friends.

"I know all that, but what were you thinking will happen?"

I must admit that I was uncontrollably excited that evening. On one side was the jolt that I got from her that she was marrying someone else and to counter that, I had this opportunity. "I don't know. I was terribly upset that I lost you and wanted to somehow meet you, talk to you and say goodbye. You were my ideal girl in every sense and at that age, unabashed desire surfaces without warning. I convinced myself that this was not puppy love or a passing infatuation but true adoration and I was genuinely broken hearted."

"OK, OK. I know it's almost twenty years now, so you may not remember the details. Were you...?"

"Let me be honest here. We are adults now." I enunciated each word slowly. "I wanted to seduce you! I am sorry!"

"Oh! I knew that, I think. Just wanted to hear what you felt." She leaned on my shoulder and wrapped her arms around mine. "Hope you don't mind me doing this."

"Of course not. I love it." I took my right hand off the steering wheel and held her soft hand lovingly. She still wore her ring, I noted.

"I remember that day, you saying how much I meant to you," she began. "you sat on the floor beside me and hugged my legs. I remember feeling for you; your pain, your sadness." I had hoped it was not pity.

"I had begged you for a last hug, right?"

"Yes! Wait a minute." She had said and gone to the phone and dialed a number waited and spoke a few words and returned. "I just called my parents' friends to see if they had arrived. Just making sure we are safe, you know."

I think we both went back to that day almost two decades ago and recollected minutes; may be seconds. Fay had stood up to dim the lights. The curtains were all drawn. When she turned from the switch I had jumped up to join her and even before she knew it, she was in my arms. I smothered her soft body to mine and my fingers traversed her back over the cotton top that she was wearing. There was some polite reciprocation. There were no perceivable feelings like I had. I had moved my hand to her hair and her neck and drew caressing lines on her. My chin was on her shoulder and it was easy for me to blow warm air into her lovely neck. Then gathering my guts, I planted a gentle kiss there. No response. My body was flush against hers but still adhering to limits of conventional friendship. I could feel her breasts against my chest and her head rested against my shoulder. I knew there were stirrings of arousal in me and I kept my pelvis slightly away from her. Her arms were lightly curled around me with no evidence of passionate emotions like mine. After all she was going to get married!

There was a desire to kiss her again and I did so on her cheek. Her lips were quite close and inviting but I was reminded of my inebriated kiss on her lips during our prom dance. Fay had stayed away from me after that, very cleverly, until we parted in the early hours of dawn.

The beautiful terrain around Lake Stephens was enchanting. I asked: "What are you thinking now? Exactly?"

"I was thinking of what I told you: 'I am getting married, Randy. I can't be doing this. It's wrong.' And you were quick to say that I wasn't married yet. Remember?"

I nodded. I recalled every little action and emotion. They were etched in my memory forever. I had taken the chance that night; perhaps it would be my last. Her face was only inches away from mine. I had edged forward, looking deep into her pretty eyes and went for her full and juicy lips. There was some surprise from her. I saw her eyes widening and with my gentle lip to lip massaging I saw her eyelids flutter and then close. I knew what that meant. I hugged her tight, this time pasting my body to hers. I did not bother about the erection that dug into her supple flesh. We broke for a breath and I was triumphant when she did not resist my second kiss. Standing right there, we kissed several times. It was so exhilarating for me that I was simply drunk with craving.

Coming back to the present, I reminded her. "Do you remember when we stood there and hugged and kissed and kissed?"

"Yes." She remembered with feeling. Then she whispered: "And I felt you. So hard against me. I felt so embarrassed. And thrilled that I was able to do that to you!"

We came to a good spot to park on a hillock with a wonderful view of the lake below. There was only one other SUV parked and I chose a spot at the other end. The erotic conversation needed to be continued. She still had an arm hooked around mine but she looked straight ahead, dreaming sightlessly, perhaps.

"I remember and how much I cherished those moments; those kisses and the feeling of excitement. It was my very first and the very best. Tell me what you felt. We never had a chance to discuss that later."

She unbuckled her seat belt and leant towards me. Her soft breast brushed against my arm. "Before that I want to do something else. Come here! You have such wonderful shoulders and arms."

She leaned across and it was the most natural thing to do. We kissed. A gentle peck on the lips but with a lot of feeling for the memories that we were sharing.

She continued: "I suggested we go upstairs, somewhat awkwardly. You were aroused and that aroused me. Somehow the feelings of guilt melted away. I wanted to be intimate with you. You had just kissed me once again and your hands were caressing my butt. I now felt your thingy on my most sensitive part and it was driving me crazy. I actually moaned. I needed it. When we went upstairs, we kissed again and this time your fingers caressed my ass more intimately and then you touched my breasts. I was on cloud nine. You pushed me onto the bed and you were out of your pants in a jiffy. I felt shy and didn't look and almost died when you wanted to take off my clothes as well."