The following day Elizabeth and Jane called on the Gardners, Mrs Bennet decided to stay behind.
Mrs Bennet knocked and entered the study when bade to do so. Darcy enquired how he could be of service. Mrs Bennet seemed nervous to him but she always seemed so.
"Mr Darcy, forgive the intrusion, I just wanted to enquire if all is well?"
"All is fine, I don't understand your concern, madam."
"Well, I know what a trial my second daughter cam be and I just wanted to be sure she was being all she should be."
*Mrs Bennet, your daughter is everything she ought to be and more, I assure you all is well."
"Excellent! I am very glad to hear that. Mr Darcy I want to assure you if there is anything she is unwilling to do, you need only tell me and I will perform it in her stead."
"I don't understand your meaning."
"Lizzy can be very stubborn and if she is unwilling to do anything, I am saying that, you can be assured, I will."
"What tasks are you referring to, Mrs Bennet?"
"Mr Darcy, I am an experienced woman, although my husband hasn't had any need of me in more than a decade, i can assure you I am quite capable, more than capable, I dare say."
"Mrs Bennet, are you honestly suggesting what I think you are?"
"Sir, I don't wish to offend, I am simply offering any service you may require."
"Can we please end this discussion."
"As you wish, sir, my apologies."
"There is no need for apologies, Mrs Bennet, I will see you at dinner."
Darcy could not believe his ears. Are all the Bennet women like this, for heavens sake, he thought. He had to admit she is still very beautiful, until her mouth opens and the silliness spews forth that is.
Before dinner Darcy snuck into Elizabeth's room, where he found her and Jane, both getting dressed for dinner. He marveled at their different yet distinct beauties and enjoyed that they were in different states of undress.
"Must you be so brazen with your ogling, sir?" Elizabeth teased.
"I am afraid I must when so much beauty is before me."
Elizabeth smiled, "tell us, sir, with all honesty, are we really as beautiful as you portend?"
"I'm afraid I could not find words to do your beauties justice, even if I had a lifetime to express it. The words that spring to mind are exquisite, breathtaking and perfection and yet they seem insufficient."
Jane and Elizabeth looked to him then to one another.
Elizabeth went to him and kissed him tenderly.
"Well, sir, I then encourage you to ogle all you wish."
Darcy proceeded to tell them of the unusual meeting with their mother. Both were shocked, at first. Elizabeth was a bit angry but Jane tried to calm her.
"Dear sister, perhaps she is just looking for a little adventure, she did say it has been over ten long years since she has been touched." Jane entreated.
"Yes, ten years seems very harsh but to impose herself on her own daughter's betrothed?"
"I agree it is ill conceived but you know our mother is not always the most sensible and you also know that she would mean no slight or harm. Perhaps she truly believes she is helping."
"Leave it to you, Jane, to once again find the good in a situation without any."
Elizabeth smiled, Jane's words did make her feel better. Now an idea was forming.
"Perhaps we should take pity on her and give her what she desires."
It was Mr Darcy's turn to be shocked. "Please tell me you aren't expecting me to have relations with your mother?"
Elizabeth laughed, "no sir, I am concerned for you, as it is, with the two of us to keep contented."
"You doubt me, madam?"
Elizabeth kept laughing, "do not dare use that word with me, sir, lest we be late for dinner. I do not doubt your abilities nor your determination, but I think even the great Fitzwilliam Darcy can admit that we are quite the handful. I would imagine you would like to get some sleep and work done. Or am I mistaken?"
"I concede the point."
Elizabeth continued, "we need a substitute."
"Colonel Fitzwilliam!" Jane said much too quickly and with too much enthusiasm.
Elizabeth and Darcy looked to her and then gave each other a knowing look.
"I see we are going to have a discussion soon about the possibility of adding the colonel to Jane's stable of gentlemen."
"And your stable, my love?" Darcy asked.
"My dear sir, there is only one stallion ever needed in my stable. I chose him quite specifically."
Darcy smiled, "I thank you."
"But, Jane is right. The colonel is perfect. We need only convince him and set it so my mother thinks it is you."
"Your mother is still very attractive, I concede, but I am not sure that is enough to convince the colonel." Darcy stated.
Elizabeth smiled, "and if he thinks it might give him a chance with my exquisite, breathtaking and perfect sister, sir?"
Darcy shook his head, "devil thy name is woman! You never cease to astound me."
Elizabeth gave Darcy her most mischievous look, "I thank you, sir, and since I have yet to hear a protest, dare I say you are amenable to my plan, dear sister?"
They both looked to Jane who was blushing a deep red.
"Enthusiastically amenable, sister."
"And you, sir. Are you willing to share Jane?"
Darcy took his time and gave the whole situation a great deal of thought, he wasn't sure he was willing.
"I am sorry but I am not sure, I promise to keep an open mind. May we speak further after dinner?"
