(Note in Italics plz) NOTE: This story is not endorsed by any company. This is a work of fiction and is from my vivid imagination. Any resemblence from real life is entirely co-incidental.
Since I was 16 I’ve been a wrestling fan, the women are horny, and the Rock kicks serious arse. So I was delighted when one of my friends got tickets to RAW is WAR in M.S.G. during the GAP year we were taking touring America. It was supposed to sort of signify our transition from end of University to true Manhood & the outside World. We’d even laid bets on who would get bedded the most in America and who would get bedded my the hottest woman. Now I’m very modest, and I don’t have the 8-14 ridiculously large dicks some read about in these trash stories, my dick is 6 inches, and my balls aren’t particularly large, so I’m average or small, depending on whose perspective you look at it from. I also am not a slut/escort and have very British values, e.g. Most Americans are evil as they are mostly big headed and they elect the most stupid president (BUSH) who won’t sign a Kyoto agreement, which is very important for the future. I hope you begin to get a fair picture of the sort of guy I am.
Anyway the deal is that most of the WWF Diva’s are really hot. And I really respect their athleticism and showmanship even if it is entertainment scripted. I never dreamed I’d meet one though. Lita is one of the busiest individuals on the federation roster. She does everything and so here schedule is very tight, she was scheduled to be on RAW but was suffering from burnout; so another match was scheduled instead with different Diva’s competing. As you can imagine the lot of us enjoyed the other match but would have loved to see all the Diva’s compete. SmackDown! was also scheduled for M.S.G. so it made sense that the entire locker-room would be here for at least the first day. As the passes included backstage we went there after the show, but it had more or less cleared out for the night. We agreed that N.Y. would be wild so we agreed to meet Tuesday or Wednesday, depending on how lucky we got. I decided that since my Little Brother loves the business even more than I did I might try and get him a few autographs so I stayed behind whilst my friends went off in N.Y.
Most superstars I came across were friendly but offered me nothing apart from those who liked the look of me, as I am very clean cut. Others turned me away. Eventually I got to Lita’s dressing room, knocked and poked my head around. I found it empty but there was still her thong in the room, so I pocketed it intending to possibly buy a ticket for SmackDown! and give it to her then. As I turned around she walked in.
“What are you doing with that thing?” She demanded in a husky voice “Nothing” I replied innocently raising my hands above my head defensively “Put it down, or I’ll call security” she demanded. I had no intention of that happening so I threw it into a corner of the room near the shower. She went to pick it up, and I had a wicked kiss-&-run idea. As she whirled around about to give me an earful I pressed up to her and kissed her heavily, however my plan backfired, she grabbed me around the waist and I knew I was gonna get screwed by security, those arms can really hurt you know.