Big Howie Does It Again
By : DirtyDaveHollywood
Starring Howard Wolowitz From The Big Bang Theory And Kathie Lee Gifford
Howard Wolowitz was in Atlantic City for a NASA conference which kinda turned into a weekend at the casinos. The conference didn't last as long as expected, but instead of going back home to Pasadena early, Howard decided to enjoy his time away from home and hang out on the boardwalk for the whole weekend.
His home life since his wife Bernadette gave birth has been full of dirty diapers, crying, and sleepless nights... and that's just Howard being Howard. So, he decided to give himself a little getaway break in Atlantic City.
By unfortunately for Howard, the gambling hasn't exactly gone his way. He's down about $7,500. He knows when his sweet, but easily angered wife Bernie finds out about it, she'll more than likely yell like a crazed maniac at him and more than likely make him sleep out back in the shed, so he's determined to turn his misfortune around.
"Ok, Atlantic City... its time for Big Howie to take over." Howard looks at himself in his hotel room mirror, grinning confidently, all decked out in his favorite blue... and tight... shirt and pants combo. His tight pants really accentuate Big Howie quite well. Howard has a big one, despite his short size. And he's determined to use it to turn around his bad luck.
"Ok... whew. Here we go. You ready, champ?" Howard asks his Big Howie. He rubs it for good luck and heads out the door, more than ready for a wild... hopefully profitable... adventure.
"Hey there, ladies." Howard greets a couple of female guests on his way to the elevator. A very confident smile plastered on his chapstick glossed lips. One of the ladies gives him an approving smile as she sees his bulge in those ridiculously tight pants. Howard makes sure to rub it for her. A little treat for the sexy milfs.
The other milf shakes her head at her friend and at Howard, and keeps walking to her room. Her friend follows behind her, waving at Howard. He thinks about throwing her a "Big Howie Special" and getting some money out of it, but he doesn't think she looks like she's financially worth the effort. Maybe later though, he thinks to himself.
The elevator doors open and Howard walks in, getting in one last look at the pretty milf walking to her room before the doors close.
Howard stands in the back of the elevator, feeling pretty good about himself. He looks around. It's a glass elevator so you can see everything outside. The pool area is packed. Hotel guests are everywhere. Money being lost by the second.
The elevator stops and another guest gets on. An older female guest. Howard can't see her face, just her long, dirty blonde hair and the full length fur coat she's wearing. She's also wearing dark glasses, obviously trying not to be noticed.
The doors shut and the elevator heads down. The only noise Howie can hear is the pop music playing in the elevator. Billie Eilish, he thinks.
Howard looks around as he leans against the back wall of the elevator, the lady in front of him still has her back to him. She looks at her phone, but Howard still can't tell what she looks like.
She makes a call and Howard finally finds out who's in front of him. He can tell by her voice that it's none other than Kathie Lee Gifford. One of Howard's many crushes. And a fellow Jew so she's a kosher crush, so to speak.
Once Kathie Lee hangs up, Howard decides to make his move. He clears his throat and gets to work. "Excuse me, are you Kathie Lee Gifford?" He asks, smiling his friendliest, least creepiest smile.
"Why?" Kathie Lee asks without turning around to acknowledge Howard.
"Well, I couldn't help but notice your beautiful voice. I'm such a fan of yours, not only of your TV gigs, but also a big fan of your singing. You have the voice of an angel. A beautiful, smokin' hot angel."
"Kathie Lee pauses, not saying a word. She takes off her dark glasses, then turns to the side to see Howard. His anticipation is outta control. He's so excited about the possibility of banging one of his biggest crushes. His confidence is sky high.
"Thanks." Kathie Lee says one word, then puts her glasses back on and turns back to face the doors, ignoring Howard completely. Howard's confidence takes a hit.
"Why didn't she fall for my immense charm?" He quietly asks himself.
