Big Bang Theory - the Roommate Transmogrification

(My interpretation of S 4/E 24 in which Penny and Raj share a bed)

(Fictional story about fictional characters)

Since Leonard was sleeping with Raj's sister Priya, the two friends decided to temporarily switch apartments. Of course, Sheldon was making Raj jump through hoops to convince him to accept the new arrangements, and Raj had just finished cooking a complete meal and setting the coffee table for a formal dinner...candle included. He had even brought a bottle of wine, even though Sheldon wouldn't even consider taking an alcoholic beverage. As they were sitting down, Penny burst through the door to Apartment 4A, her laptop in her arms, and asked Sheldon: "did you guys change your wi-fi password again?"

Sheldon simply answered, "yes...it's pennygetyourownwifi...no capitals or spaces; oh and by the way, since when has society totally collapsed to the point where we no longer knock."

Noticing the fancy table, she blurted out, "thanks...wow...what's all this?"

"It's the difference between eating and dining," Raj smiled.

"Yes...I never realized how much Leonard has been skating all these years," Sheldon remarked, "my new roommate is looking very promising."

"New roommate," Penny exclaimed, both startled and afraid.

"Yeah, since he is with my sister all the time, we decided to switch apartments," Raj told her.

Suddenly feeling very sad, Penny answered, "wow...Leonard and Priya living together...that's huge."

Penny sat down on the sofa and Raj poured her a generous glass of wine while he and Sheldon dined. After the meal, Sheldon excused himself and announced, "well, it's ten PM...good night and per the roommate agreement, please refrain from raucous laughter, clinking of glasses, and celebratory gunfire."

Raj and Penny finished the bottle of wine and were almost done with the bottle Penny had fetched from her apartment when their conversation turned more personal. Quite tipsy, they engaged in small talk: "so what made you move out," she asked.

"Well it was either move out or wear noise-cancelling headphones around my own apartment all the time," Raj told her.

"Oh...right...right. Leonard is a noisy little devil in the sack," Penny stated.

"Yeah, every night," Raj confessed.

"Really...every night...even in allergy season when he has to alternate between breathing and kissing," she asked.

"It's my sister we're talking about...can we change the subject," Raj said.

Leaning toward him, Penny asked, slurring her words, "can I tell you a secret...I screwed up. Leonard is a great guy...I never should have broken up with him. I would do anything to have him back."

Raj knew a secret too, but he wasn't telling Penny just yet. Instead he stated, "well it's better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography."

Her shiny lips looking more and more inviting, she sympathized with him: "you poor baby. If we weren't friends; and you hadn't just told me that disturbing pornography story; I'd be all over you like the speed of light squared on matter to make energy."

"Hey, you got that right...E=mc2," he exclaimed.

"Hey...I listen...I don't understand, but I listen," she smiled and drained her glass.

"You know, I have always thought that Leonard was the luckiest man on earth to be going out with you," Raj told her, "of course Leonard always thought he was the luckiest man on earth, too. It was devastating to him when you dumped him. I'm glad Priya was able to ease the pain because he really is a good guy."

Feeling suddenly very sad and on the verge of tears, Penny admitted: "actually he said he was the luckiest man in the universe."

He proceeded to clear the dishes off the coffee table, and when he returned, he sat down on the couch beside the gorgeous blond. They were both feeling very mellow and after watching TV for a while, Penny leaned against him and lay her head on his shoulder; feeling very comfortable. She hadn't been on a date since dumping Leonard and subconsciously craved the attention of a mate. The closer they snuggled, the more aroused she became and when she tilted her head to look up at Raj, their eyes met; followed by their lips. As soon as their lips met, it was like initiating the launch sequence... Penny was horny beyond belief; and Raj was making out with the girl of his wet-dreams. Penny was more than familiar with the path to Leonard's room as she grabbed Raj's hand and led the way.

Hardly a word was spoken as Penny swiftly shed her clothes, and when she was naked, Raj just stood there staring at the most perfect body he would ever see. Her breasts were a full 36 C and hung ever so slightly on her chest, while being totally firm. Her pink elliptical areola surrounded large, darker pink nipples the size of gumdrops. Slender, shapely legs that seemed to be six-feet long ended at a perfect camel-toe mound. The light shining through her prominent thigh-gap revealed that she was completely shaved, with puffy labia surrounding a slit that resembled a coin slot. "Oh...my...God," Raj exclaimed in a whisper, "now I am the luckiest man on earth."

Seeing that Raj was still dressed, Penny asked him: "are we going to do this or what...let's go...lose the clothes." She jumped onto the familiar bed, nearly falling due to her inebriation, and lay back against the pillows, looking like a blond Cleopatra as she watched Raj throw his clothes in every direction. When he threw off his boxers, she sat up straight and yelled: "holy crap on a cracker...your cock is huge." Raj's erect prick waved in front of his body like a caramel covered kielbasa. She estimated that it was eleven or twelve inches in length and as fat as her wrist, with a flared purple crown. "With that crowd pleaser, why can't you keep a girlfriend," she inquired.

"Sadly, I never get this far with a girl," he admitted as he crawled onto the bed beside her.

Finding that she couldn't take her eyes off his prodigious pole, Penny grasped it with both hands and pulled him towards her. "Well, I can't wait to feel this monster inside me," she confessed as she stroked it eagerly. She knew she felt virtually no compassion for Raj, but was so horny that she needed relief. Her arousal was causing the blood to rush so fast through her body that it was actually working against her, as the wine was now completely absorbed into her bloodstream and actually making her dizzy. Spreading her legs wide as Raj sat between them, she suddenly remembered: "umm...do you have protection...there might be some in Leonard's nightstand if you don't."

"Of course I do," he replied, jumping off the bed and grabbing his trousers, "I'm always packing." Although he too was drunk, he paused while crawling back up the bed with the condom package in his hand to stare at Penny's incredible naked body...specifically the glistening mound between her long legs. In a matter of minutes he was going to be fucking the girl he had dreamed about since the day she had moved into 4B...the most perfect body he had ever imagined. Penny was more beautiful nude than he had dared to dream.

He was so nervous that he just fumbled with the seemingly impenetrable condom wrapper; even trying to tear it with his mouth. Eager to quench her sexual thirst, Penny snatched it from him, saying: "here give it to me...I can do this blindfolded." As if by magic she suddenly had the condom in her hand and was reaching for his gigantic pole. Staring at her perfect body and feeling her warm hands

fondling his prick was too much for Raj. Just as she finished unrolling the thin latex, Raj's body jerked and he ejaculated into the tight receptacle. "Are you kidding me," she exclaimed with an angry look on her face as she watched his body twitch. Penny was more than familiar with the scenario; her beauty had been too much for many men over the years and she just lay back against the pillows and closed her eyes. "In twenty minutes we'll try this again," she mumbled as she already was drifting off to sleep.

"I don't think it will take that long," Raj sighed as he lay back beside her and snapped the condom off his shrinking pole and pulled the covers up over them. He set it on the nightstand and then without thinking, closed his eyes too.

Glancing at Leonard's bedside clock, Penny saw that it was 3:46 AM and felt very disoriented. Her head spinning, she thought: "I know this is Leonard's room...did I get back together with him. Finally something is going right in my life!" There was an arm laying over her on top of the covers and when her eyes finally focused, she knew immediately that it was not Leonard's. The skin was too dark and it was not his watch. Slowly and carefully, she turned her head and saw Raj's head laying on the pillow next to hers. Raising the covers, she confirmed they were both naked and had to stifle a scream as she whispered, "oh my God...no."

The last thing she remembered was when they were in the living room drinking wine, but circumstances seemed to speak for themselves. She slowly rolled out of bed, trying not to wake him, but the effort was futile. He sat up and grinned at her naked body as she attempted to get dressed. "I know this is a stupid question," she whispered, "but did we...you know." Raj just smiled and nodded in the affirmative. "I was afraid of that...wait...did you have protection." Again Raj just grinned and held up the used condom, obviously full of his sperm. "Raj, this never happened...you hear me," she pleaded, "Leonard can never find out."

Knowing that he was lying, Raj answered, "oh it happened alright...and it was wonderful. I should have told you last night, but Priya planned on sleeping with Leonard last night and then breaking up with him this morning...she's moving back to India."

Her still fuzzy brain processing this information, Penny realized that she now had the opportunity to get back with Leonard; and she wanted nothing more. "I have to go now," she told him, knowing she had to leave before Leonard came back, and before Sheldon got up. "Remember...mums the word."

As she rushed out the door and across the hall, unnoticed; Raj smiled widely and whispered out loud: "oh we'll be seeing each other again...you can count on that."

Over the next couple of weeks while Leonard was attempting to deal with the painful break-up, Penny made a point of being there any time he wanted to vent his feelings. At every opportunity she subtlety dropped hints at her availability, and once came right out and told him how much she missed him when he was involved with Priya. Finally coming out of his funk, he asked her: " I know you said you thought it would be a good idea if we stayed just friends...but would you maybe like to go out again sometime?"

"There is nothing I would like more," she jumped at the chance. The grin on his face would forever be imprinted on her brain, as she touched his arm and leaned in to give him a peck on the cheek. They soon began dating on a regular basis and it was like they had never split up. Penny had never been more contented in her life and actually gave thoughts to spending her life with the lovable nerd. He was kind and thoughtful and supported her in any endeavor she chose. And the sex was incredible. She had always felt that Leonard's extremely fat, nine inch penis was the perfect size for her and he had become even more accomplished in making love to her. Penny assumed she actually had Priya to thank for that...maybe it was that Kama Sutra thing the guys were always teasing Raj about.

Raj may not have been confident with women, but he was of superior intelligence, and he had been biding his time with Penny. He had been watching her relationship with Leonard grow until he was sure Penny had formed a deep affection for his friend. Now was the time to strike...like a coiled cobra. She was in her apartment, slowly getting dressed for her shift at the Cheesecake Factory when the phone rang. She answered with a cheery "hello," but her mood changed immediately when she heard Raj's voice. Raj never called her directly, and just the sound of his voice sent a chill down her spine. Penny had tried to put the whole "Raj affair" behind her, especially since it had been so long ago; but knew this was a call to be dreaded.

"Hello Penny," he began, "you're probably wondering why I'm calling; well I'll get right to the point. I'm sure you remember that night we shared a bed and had wonderful, passionate sex...or maybe you don't remember the sex part. Well, I've been thinking that it would be a shame if Leonard were to find out about it; especially since you two are getting along so well."

Nearly in a panic, Penny blurted out, "what do you want Raj...why are you doing this now."

"Well, I've been in a bit of a dry spell lately and I knew you would want to help me out...you know...so our secret didn't leak out," he smugly informed her.

"You're actually going to blackmail me," she shouted.

"I prefer to think of it as extortion," he corrected her, "it sounds so much more sophisticated and mysterious."

Feeling on the verge of tears, she answered, "I thought you were my friend. What makes you think Leonard will even believe you?"

"Well I may, or may not, have some pictures on my phone. Quite clear ones, I may add," Raj told her. The truth was he had taken a couple pictures with his phone of her incredible nude body as she lay in Leonard's bed. In one, he had been licking her wonderful breast. He wished he had taken some pictures of her legs spread, but he himself had been on the verge of passing out. He had used the photos many times in his fantasies and now desired the real thing.

Penny knew she was at Raj's mercy. She would do virtually anything not to ruin her relationship with Leonard. "What do you want," she asked.

"I know Leonard will be flying to New Jersey for his mother's birthday this weekend and I was thinking that you could come over here and spend the night...if you know what I mean...and I'm sure you do. Wear something sexy...something you can dance in," Raj instructed her. "I'll take your silence as a Yes," he added, when she didn't answer. Penny ended the call and just stood motionless in her apartment. She was torn between two emotions: she wanted to cry, and yet she was so angry at Raj that she wanted to punch something...hard and repeatedly. As tears began to stream down her face, she sunk down onto the sofa and began to punch the throw pillow with all her might.

For the rest of the week, she avoided Leonard's apartment when she knew Raj was there; instead asking Leonard to join her in her apartment (for which he was more than eager). After kissing Leonard good-bye as he entered his Uber to the airport on Friday night, she retreated to her apartment and began consuming a good base of vodka. Not scheduled for a shift on Saturday, Penny wanted to make sure she would "feel no pain" all day. If she was going to do this, she wanted to be certain it would just be a fuzzy memory on Sunday. Before going to bed on Friday, she laid out the clothes she had selected for her encounter with Raj. The very short little black sleeveless dress that had gotten her out of two speeding tickets should do nicely. There were no shoulder straps, which should function perfectly when she did the strip-tease that she knew was expected of her. No shoulder straps meant no bra, which should please Raj. For panties, she chose her skimpiest black lace thong...Leonard's favorite style.

When they asked, she always told her bar customers at the Cheesecake Factory, that the best way to avoid a hangover was to never sober up; so she took her own advice and kept mixing vodka with orange juice all day Saturday. When her Uber driver saw her waiting at the curb Saturday night, her outfit completed by five inch black stilettos, he assumed he was transporting a hooker to her next job. She confirmed the destination that she had given on the phone and in a short few minutes, they had arrived at Raj's building. The driver even refused a tip, telling Penny that the view of her legs in the rear-view mirror was gratuity enough. That little bit of frivolity seemed to calm her as she knocked lightly on Raj's door. When the door opened, Raj's eyes widened as he looked up and down her body; a look she was well acquainted with. He whistled softly and stepped aside so she could enter. The first thing she noticed was that they were not alone: sitting on Raj's sofa was Howard and Stuart...both smiling.

"Hey," she exclaimed angrily, "this was supposed to be just you and me...no one else was supposed to know."

"It is a well known fact that I can't keep a secret," Raj answered, "I'm nearly as bad at it as you. They're my friends and I always share with my friends."

"Oh it's true," Howard added, "he showed us the pictures weeks ago, and we've been waiting anxiously ever since to see your body in the flesh...so to speak." Stuart flashed his creepy grin and nodded, before complimenting her on her dress.

Penny's face flushed with anger, but her inebriation trumped it and she quickly resigned herself to her fate. "Maybe I can get out of here with just a dance," she thought as she could almost feel their eyes ogling her shapely form. Looking around the living room, she was astonished to see an actual stripper-pole installed in front of the couch. "In your living room," she gestured while addressing Raj.

"Do you like it," he responded. "Remember Howard is an engineer and he's been busy. We've been anticipating this visit for quite some time. It isn't every day a blond goddess graces us with her presence."

Her head already spinning from the vodka and the unforeseen turn of events, Penny shrugged her shoulders and merely asked, "yeah, yeah, yeah...do you have anything to drink?"

"We were expecting you," Howard chuckled, "of course we have alcohol...what is your pleasure...besides me, of course."

Rolling her eyes, Penny ignored his insinuation and answered, "vodka or tequila, please...and lots of it." Howard dashed to Raj's fridge, poured a small amount of orange juice in a travel-tumbler and filled it with Ketel One. While Penny was gulping down the mixture, Raj scrolled through his phone and fed some bass-thumping dance music through his Amazon Alexa speakers. Completely under the influence now, Penny's incredible body began to naturally sway to the beat as she felt the music course through her. With the three men seated on the couch in front of her, she grabbed the stripper-pole and twirled around as if on a carnival ride. Throwing her wide hips from side to side, she began a series of dips where she bent her knees and dropped all the way to the floor before bouncing back up. Her black dress only extended a couple inches below her ass when standing still, so when she dipped, it rose all the way up to cup the bottoms of her cheeks and they had a clear view of her lacy thong.

Her gyrations were becoming more and more violent, and her ample breasts threatened to bounce right up and out of her bodice as she danced. The truth was, Penny reveled in the reactions her marvelous body invoked in men; the power she felt over them. Something of an exhibitionist, she paused in front of them, reached behind her and slowly lowered the zipper that was keeping the dress in place. Resuming her sensuous dance, she shimmied and swayed until the tight sheath began to slide down her shapely body. As the dress sunk lower, her incredible breasts popped out and she reached up to cup them in her hands. Raj, Stuart and Howard yelled in delight at the sight of her marvelous tits, which were even better than in pictures. They were as firm as Jello molds, standing straight out from her chest, and jiggled as she danced.

Rosy, elliptical areola surrounded gumdrop nipples which were firmly erect as she ran her hands over them. As her hips swayed to the music, her dress slipped lower and lower until it cleared her hips and drifted to the floor where she hooked it with her foot and kicked it aside. The men threw themselves against the back of the couch as they actually drooled over her magnificent body. Now clad only in her tiniest thong; which was more like a string of yarn between her legs; and her "fuck me" heels, she was truly a dream come true. With the shoes, her unbelievable legs seemed to be six feet long as she danced in their faces. Wasting no time, she turned away from them, bent completely over until her hair was sweeping the floor, reached behind her, and slowly lowered her thong down her endlessly long legs. Kicking it to the side she slapped her own firm, perfectly round ass, and then stood up. Turning around to face them, she spread her arms wide so they could see the whole package, and then resumed her dance.