CHAPTER 1
People in wheelchairs are still people. We want the same things as everyone else, including relationships and sex. The accident which stopped me walking didn't affect my cock and balls. I was as eager as ever.
Unfortunately, the one I thought was going to be my partner for life decided not to be.
Gays are just normal people as well. Which means they can be as shallow, narrowminded, bigoted or just as stupid as other people. Some of them are lovely and kind, of course, but no more than the population at large.
Naturally, he had to come to visit me in hospital, but by the time the surgeons had finished what they could do and told me that was it, he had managed to come up with a formula as to why it was best that we parted. I knew he was fucking with someone else.
I realised that I had been a bit of a trophy. A black lover, not bad looking, if I say so myself. I was the black best friend that many people claimed in order to show they weren't prejudiced.
Of course, there are many jobs that people in wheelchairs can do, as I was repeatedly told.
Yes, but digging ditches and laying drains isn't one of them. Which is what I had been doing when I had my accident. Don't kid yourself that it's all done by machine these days. Of course, as much as possible is, but we were mostly working around gas pipes, water pipes, electric cables and God knows what under the streets these days, so there was a lot of hand digging. In decent weather, that was an excuse to get the top off and display the muscles.
It was mostly the women that looked, of course, and I didn't mind a bit. I'd even give them a wink and a bit of saucy talk like the other lads. They were amused when I did. Yes, I was a show-off. told you gays can be shallow and stupid. Which is why I didn't realise it was the show that my supposed partner was in love with. A flabby man in a chair was not the same.
The Health and Safety Executive had to investigate the accident, of course, while the company denied liability. I never knew these things take so much time. I was being taken care of by the NHS, of course, and had other things to worry about. When I eventually started thinking about the fortune in compensation I was going to get and how I would spend it, the financial crash happened and the company and its insurance ceased to exist. I was told later that the likelihood of payment to me had caused them to withdraw assets early, and big cash bonuses had been paid to the directors.
The lawyers (of course) made sure their fees were paid, so people like me got fuck-all!
Assorted people tried to help, of course, from hard-stretched council social services to charity volunteers including the obligatory ones hoping to get you into religion.
One of the things they did was to put wheelchair people together in groups to support each other.
People in wheelchairs are normal people, all sorts, but not pleased to be stuck in a wheelchair. Some were nice and some were nasty. They tended to be a bit crotchety. It was a bit of a relief for many of them not to have to play up being patient. Quite a few of them were more or less in constant pain. They'd have a good grumble and swear before smiling as their relatives collected them.
I was lucky.
Surprise, surprise! I actually got a job!
There was a company called Remploy which had factories operated by disabled people, and I passed the test for some assembly work. Not very demanding intellectually, but good to know that I was earning a living.
As for sex, I was not so lucky.
The slightly vain fit young man was now the embarrassing one in the wheelchair. I could move it around, and everyone pretended I was dancing like them, but I could tell they would prefer me not to be around.
There were some willing to let me suck cock, but not keen to do anything with mine, and I didn't want to be a convenience, I wanted a relationship, even a shallow one like the ones I had had before. And I wanted to fuck.
Eventually, I stopped going to the places where I had once been welcome.
People in wheelchairs are not supposed to have sex.
CHAPTER 2
Remploy was good, but there were no romantic opportunities over the next few years.
Socially I was mainly with other wheelchair users, and nothing happened there or seemed remotely likely to happen.
There was now free porn on the internet, so that and my hand was my sex-life.
Then Remploy closed down, and I was back to long-term unemployment.
There were not that many jobs available anyway, and I didn't really have a lot to offer. I was sent on employability courses, and had periodic assessments in case I had suddenly regained the ability to dig ditches and lay drains.
The Job Centre had to go through the motions of finding jobs for us, so there were various sessions for us losers in wheelchairs.
One day I was put next to Mr Armitage. I was gay, so I was put next to a gay man. Like I would have been put next to a black man if they'd had one. He was a lot older than me and I certainly didn't want to be his toyboy. We all had name tags, but he didn't like being addressed by his Christian name, so had taken his off
He was in his sixties, quite posh, and obviously an old queen. He had even less chance of a job than me, but we both had to attend to get the jobseekers' allowance.
I thought he was probably racist, but too polite to say it. We didn't say much to each other for a few weeks.
Then he said "I rather admire your stand-offish nature. You're not pretending to be interested just because I'm old. It's quite refreshing."
I said "Yes and you're a miserable old bugger, too!"
"Nice to meet you, Weston" he said. "Call me Monty!"
Gradually we started ignoring the others and moving off to one side. We still didn't talk a lot. He said he appreciated my silences. He said too many people seem to think you have to talk nonstop.
Things started to come out. I said how I had been dumped. He told me about his partner, a much younger man, apparently fit, who suddenly dropped dead while they were looking for a home together. Now he was alone in the world. He had no children and no relatives to speak of.
Actually, there was a lot we disagreed about, and we had some quite strong arguments. I think he was mostly right, being better educated. I was mainly asked to keep my voice down and moderate my language by good hearted people trying to help us.
When he was sixty-five, he got his pension, and no longer came along to jobseekers.
But I slightly missed the old bugger, so once a week I got a taxi to where he lived, which was now a care home.
One day I went to the care home, and was told he had been transferred to a hospice, where I went.
He had obviously declined rapidly.
"Do me a favour, lad," he whispered. "Get me some lipstick. They wouldn't let me at the care home, but I want to go out looking as good as I can."
It was something I had not been asked before.
"Like that nurse," he said. She did look nice.
Then he needed to sleep.
I spoke to the nurse, and told her what he wanted.
"Oh, I see," she said. "He should just have asked me. Actually, it's the eyes that make all the difference. A bit of mascara on the lashes, the eyebrows, and maybe eyeliner."
I went to my wallet.
"Could you get whatever you think?" I asked. "Just tell me how much and I'll give you the cash."
Next time I came he was looking much better. It was not just the lips and eyes. His face was smoother and pinker.