Dani listened to the sound of running water in her bathroom as Jesse turned on the shower, and she wished she had the right to shower with him. He began to whistle softly, and she swallowed the thickness in her throat and retreated to the kitchen. Right! He'd said he wanted water, but she figured he wouldn't mind a cold beer and some pretzels. She waited until she heard him shut off the water before setting two longnecks and some pretzels in a bowl on a tray. She took them out to the living room, and sat down to wait, taking a sip of her beer while she did. She was staring at her toes when he walked back in, his hair damp from his shower, his clothes in his hands.
"I need a bag for these," he said, and paused where he stood.
"Leave them," she said. "I'll take care of them for you."
"You don't have to," he protested.
"I want to," she insisted, rising and going to take them from him. He let the bundle go and watched her walk back to the bathroom, where she disappeared for a few seconds. He waited for her to come back to him, and then reached for her, pulling her close.
"What are we doing?" he asked, watching her face go red.
"I don't know what you mean," she lied.
"Don't you?" he retorted.
"No," she said, and slipped away from him to sit down again. "Here, come drink your beer before it gets warm."
She offered him the other bottle of beer, and he came and took it from her, sitting next to her on the long sofa. Three gulps later, he put down the bottle and, picking up a handful of pretzels, asked casually,
"So, whose clothes am I wearing?"
He threw a few of the snack pieces into his mouth, and examined his fingertips carefully. Dani realized that he was probably feeling jealous. Her heart fluttered, but she only smiled and said,
"Don't worry, they're new."
She waited to hear what he would say, and watched him slowly raise his eyes to her face again.
"Yes, but whose are they?" His voice was carefully neutral.
"Jealous?" she asked, needing to hear him say it.
He stilled. "Just curious," he said, holding her gaze.
"Jealous," she concluded, then gasped when he pulled her hard against him.
"Dani," he said, the whisper of a warning in his voice. "I have ways of making you tell me what I want to know."
He bent his head, but instead of kissing her mouth, he planted his lips on the pulsing vein in her neck and sucked gently.
"Jesse," she moaned, and tried to move her mouth to his, but he resisted.
"Tell me," he coaxed her, nipping her earlobe, and blowing in her ear. When she resisted, he trailed his tongue behind her ear, along the column of her throat, down to the V of her neck.
"Tell... me," he demanded, between teasing her lips with his tongue.
"Okay, okay. They're mine," she said, surrendering. "I buy men's sweats because they fit me better." She sighed into his mouth just before he kissed her hungrily.
"You little tease!" He smiled against her temple.
"Jesse, what are we doing?" she asked, echoing his earlier question.
"Necking," he moaned, kissing her again, exploring her mouth with his eager tongue. "You turn me on, Dani. I'm burning up!"
His words came out in a hoarse groan, and Dani felt herself melting beneath the fire of his desire. She needed to say the words she had kept locked away in her heart for all these years.
"Jesse, I..." she stopped, hiding her face in his chest.
"You what?" he asked, suddenly still. When she hesitated, he urged her, "Tell me!"
"I love you!" she said shyly. "I've tried not to, and to ignore it for all these years. I even went away because of it, but I can't fight it anymore." She kissed his throat and felt him swallow convulsively. "It hurts so much to love you," she confessed. "I know you don't feel the same way..."
"How do you know what I feel?" he demanded roughly.
"I know you want me, Jesse, but we both know that's not the same thing. So we're giving in to our desires now, but that's not love."
She sighed and pulled away from him. Jesse let her go and watched her for a moment through hooded eyes. Dani gripped her fingers together and bit her lip, avoiding his eyes.
"You don't know anything about me if you don't know how I feel about you!" he exclaimed roughly. He stood up suddenly, flinging himself away from her and moving to stand by the kitchen door, his hands in the pockets of the sweat pants.
"The day I discovered I loved you more than my life, years ago, the final paper was due, and students, you included, were submitting them to me in my office. You knocked and walked in, smiling at me. I looked at you and felt like you'd socked me in the gut. Suddenly everything made sense to me. The way I couldn't wait to get to class, the way my heart clenched every time I spent more than a second next to you, inhaling your perfume, listening to your voice. The way my hands trembled from the need to touch you and to hold you so close to me that you couldn't help but know how much I wanted you. The way my mouth watered to kiss your face, to get mouth-to-mouth close to you."
Dani sat transfixed, feeling the love and longing she had for him drowning her senses. She watched him come back to stand in front of her, and let him pull her out of her seat. She folded herself against him, and he hugged her hard.
"I love you, Dani, more than my life. I'll do anything you want me to do, as long as we can be together." He kissed the top of her head, and pressed himself against her, moaning softly.
"Kiss me, Jesse," she begged, and he obliged, sitting on the sofa and pulling her onto his lap. Dani could feel the hard, pulsing length of him under her, and her need swamped her.
"It was pure torture being your teacher, your thesis director, your friend, for all those years," he said, nipping her earlobes. "I wanted so much to tell you how I felt, but I knew it was inappropriate, and I was a junior professor anyway, who could be fired if I made a wrong move, even though I was on the tenure track."
He caressed her shoulders with trembling hands. "When you went away, I missed you so badly I thought I'd die, but I knew it was for the best."
He kissed her eyes closed, and touched his mouth to the tip of her nose. "I knew where you were, because I had a friend find you for me," he admitted, "but then I didn't know whether you'd want to see me, so I left you alone."
He laughed, a short, rough sound. "I thought, just before you left, that maybe you were feeling what I felt, too, but when you went away, I figured I'd got it all wrong." He sighed, brushing his mouth over hers, touching her lips with his tongue as he went. He looked into her eyes, and smiled. "I'm so glad I was right after all," he said, and plundered her mouth.
Dani felt the fire rising in her belly, and pressed herself against him.
"Love me, Jesse," she said, her moans muffled against his mouth.
He turned her on his lap, so that she was straddling him, and then he groaned and pushed his hips up against her warm, moist center. She trembled violently when he slid a hand to her waist, easing open the button on her jeans and pulling the zipper down. He slid a finger inside the stiff material and teased her. His hands shook, and Dani kissed him wildly. They rocked against each other until Dani felt herself on the edge of a climax.
"Too many clothes!" she panted, and stood up so she could remove her jeans. Jesse stopped her, standing over her with fire in his eyes.