Old Wounds

It like to give a huge thanks to rnebular for again taking the time to edit and give suggestions to my story... especially pointing my overuse of ellipses, which after reading his editing comments... I really should've known better. I also have to give him credit for the title and story description; both worked better than I originally planned. As always, I appreciate the comments -- good or bad. I hope you enjoy.

-HP

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It was shortly before ten at night, when the cab dropped Ivan back at his apartment from the bus station. It was a couple long days of travelling, but more than worth it. He was excited and anxious, and half-considered just waiting up for Christie to get home from her shift at work. His rationale was that he'd been so patient so far, he could wait another couple days just as he planned.

The twenty-year-old had been with Christie since grade ten. No one was surprised that they left town together, to attend the same college in Chicago. Even her parents were completely okay with them moving in right after high school. They were in the third year of their respective programs: his marketing communications and her business management.

Ivan couldn't help but think when he left his suitcase beside their bed that he was the luckiest man in the world. Christie was a sight to behold; tall slender blond with a year-round tanned complexion, which he didn't mind her splurging on even though money was often tight. He worked part-time for the local paper, while she was a server in a restaurant lounge.

It was so hard not giving anything away a few days before, when Ivan told her that he needed to go away for something important. It was probably the first time in their years as a couple that he kept something from her, other than anniversary or birthday plans. With those, she had an idea what was coming -- this one he really wanted her to be surprised. He did feel a little guilty when she was a little upset that he wouldn't give her any details, other than he was going back to their hometown.

Ivan told her he made it there safe, but then Christie dug for information, so he just told her that he'd see her soon. She didn't even know he came back, so it would be a bit of a surprise when she got home. And then in a few days... it would be all worth it.

Ivan woke later that night hearing voices from outside the bedroom. It was thirty minutes after Christie's shift ended, so someone must have given her a ride home.

"Come on, I told you what was going on," said a voice that Ivan recognized as Scott, a thirty-something married bartender that she worked with. He was of Mexican descent, built like a shithouse, and thought he was God's gift to women. Ivan didn't care for the guy, but he was nice enough to drive Christie home occasionally, so she didn't have to cab it home.

"Scotty..." said Christie in a funny giggle. She sounded a little drunk. She wasn't much of a drinker.

"Trust me, I'm a guy..." said Scott in a tone that didn't set well with Ivan.

He was going to wait until the older man left to let her know he was home, but something didn't seem right.

"So... that's how 'you' are with your wife?" Christie said in a really flirty voice.

"Only when I'm doing something I shouldn't..." Scott murmured, and Ivan had enough and climbed out of bed.

"Ditch the loser and we can have fun like this all the time..." groaned Scott right before Ivan opened the bedroom door and his world ended.

Scott was sitting on the couch facing the bedroom door. His pants were undone, and on her knees beside him, was the love of Ivan's life with her mouth around Scott's cock with her eyes closed.

"Shit..." said Scott, and Christie looked up and screamed.

Ivan didn't bother getting dressed; he just headed into the bedroom and grabbed his suitcase.

Christie was bawling on the couch when he headed to the door.

Scott stood with his cock pointing out and puffed his chest. "Look, don't make any fucking trouble..."

"No trouble, I'm leaving so you two can finish... forever." Ivan slammed the apartment door and didn't look back.

**

After ten years, it was difficult for Ivan to return to Chicago, but the job opportunity was too good to pass up. He was responsible for rebranding a transportation company: new logo, new website, the whole nine yards with a seven-month deadline. He hadn't set foot in that city since he walked out on Christie and took a cab to the bus station to leave town. After dropping out of college for a year, he eventually moved to Boston to finish his degree there. Actually, without the distraction of a live-in girlfriend, his academics were better than ever before. It was just another reminder of the sacrifices he'd made for Christie. He gave her everything he had; all she gave him was a broken heart and a lesson to never trust women.

Actually, it'd been probably six years since he last thought about Christie, but seeing places they used to go together brought back those painful memories. He kept an eye out constantly the first week back, but had no idea if she still even was in Chicago.

Neither his friends nor family had any contact with her since his older sister, April, collected all his things from the apartment. Apparently, it was quite a yelling match, but - as Ivan insisted -- April didn't hit her, even though she really wanted to. She didn't tell much of the details, just that Christie accused him of cheating. April called her a fucking idiot for thinking that, and she didn't deserve to know the truth of why Ivan went back home. All that seemed another life away.

Even though Ivan was breaking his mother's heart by being a bachelor for life, he'd only sworn off settling down, not casually dating. He wasn't the scrawny twenty-year-old that left town. Lots of anger and motivation at the gym had the five-foot-eleven bachelor gaining almost thirty pounds of muscle. Maybe as he approached middle age, a bit of fat stuck around his midsection, but a little flex of his biceps generally attracted attention.

Haunted a bit by his past, Ivan still had made no attempts to pursue the fairer sex since returning to town. During his coffee break, he was thinking that needed to change as he admired the woman in line in front of him. She was taller, had a short dark brown bob hairstyle, nice curvy hips unlike some super skinny girls around.

Looking appreciatively at the lower half of her body, he thought, "Holy shit, does this one have nice muscle tone.'

Under her tight-fitting skirt and dark stockings were a pair of the sexiest legs he's seen for a while. The heels probably helped, but her calves and thighs that were visible could've been sculpted, they were so perfect. And her ass through her skirt was just breathtaking. Not seeing a wedding ring, Ivan planned to introduce himself.

"Excuse me," Ivan said and planned to give a funny, but not overly flirtatious line. She probably worked in the same building, so he didn't to rush it. She turned around, and his worst fear came true.

"Ivan?" said the voice before she turned. Her face looked older, fuller, but it was definitely her.

"Christie?"

"I go by Tina now..." She said. The glasses and short brown hair suited her. She was just as beautiful as a thirty-year-old woman, as she was a fifteen-year-old girl all those years ago -- maybe even more so.

Ivan, without a word, turned and headed back to his office. He didn't go near the coffee counter for the next few days, and made a habit of coming up the back stairs to avoid the more crowded lobby and elevator. He debated telling someone, but none of his current friends had any idea of their history, and his family had harped on him to just forget and move on.

He stared at the email waiting for him Friday morning for nearly an hour. It was sent three in the morning to his work email. He read it so many times that it was still memorized in his brain years later:

Ivan. I know I don't deserve this, but can we please meet tonight for coffee or drinks. There are things I need to say I never got to. I understand if you don't want to. You don't need to stop having coffee and lunch to avoid me. I will stay out of your way if that's what you want. I'm glad you look well and are doing well -- even if you hate me.

-Tina (Christie is gone)

Ivan had a sick feeling in his stomach and was going to press delete, but instead replied with his mobile number. He called himself stupid a couple of times in the bathroom, then by afternoon break convinced himself, what harm could it do? Other than sharing a video of her fucking Scott while laughing about him (which he knew would never happen), what could she do to cause him more pain?

Ivan chose coffee over booze; last thing he wanted was to be drunk around her. He wanted her to suffer with guilt, but not to actually hurt her, as stupid as that was. To be honest, he really was curious what her life had been like the last ten years.

The place she picked, thankfully, was not one they ever went to, and was fairly empty. Ivan was sure this was done in case emotions got out of hand. One thing the gym and martial arts training had taught him was discipline. He trusted himself to not get angry -- it was the other emotions that he was worried about. He never wanted to give her the satisfaction of seeing him cry.

She was already waiting for him. Her glasses were gone, and she was dressed in jeans and a sweater. She looked dressed for groceries, not meeting an old boyfriend she hadn't seen in ten years. That suited Ivan fine, though he wore tight jeans and shirt to make sure she could notice what she lost.

"Ivan, I never expected you to come," she said softly, cradling her phone in her hand, "I'm really glad you did."

"Okay," Ivan said coldly.

"First, even though I knew we were through, I really tried to find you and tell you this. Nobody would help, you were off the grid, and I gave up after a few months." Tina looked down at her hands and took a breath. "Ivan, you were the best thing to happen to me, and I never appreciated it. I was young, stupid and selfish. I never was nearly as good to you as you were to me. Not that it matters now, but what you saw, was the only thing that ever happened between Scott and me while you and I were dating -- other than a kiss in the car before coming up to our apartment. I was never going farther than what you saw. That was a horrible, horrible mistake, and the only time I ever came close to ever cheating on you. You were completely justified to leave me, but please know how incredibly sorry I am."

Ivan just stared silently.

Tina wiped a tear from her eye. "I know how much losing you hurt for me, so I can only imagine it was ten times worse for you. It took years before I forgave myself for doing that to us. I hope it's been long enough that you can forgive me, or at least not hate me?"

Ivan exhaled and got up to buy a coffee from the counter. Tina was wiping her eyes with a napkin when he returned. He suspected she knew she'd cry and that's why no eye make-up.

"I imagine that was really hard to say," Ivan said. "Never really thought us ending would've bothered you. Okay, I hoped you'd feel guilty, but I figured that was your way of ending us without having to leave me."

"I never wanted us to end," Tina said, "It was a drunk stupid mistake. Not sure what you heard, but that asshole had me convinced you were cheating on me. I believed it. Want to know the kicker? I was planning on forgiving you and forget that it happened -- maybe it was one last fling to get out of your system. We'd only ever been with each other at that time. I got drunk, and just planned to flirt around for revenge -- that's it.

"That was Christie: young, selfish and stupid. It all was a ploy by asshole to fuck me. I knew that was his intention when he came up to the apartment. My brilliant solution, sorry, Christie's solution: I'll just suck him off and he'll be good and leave. I wasn't even going to let him touch my tits..."

"Christie's tits," Ivan corrected.

Tina looked up and almost smiled. "Yes, I guess they are a little different from mine. I forgot how witty you could be... Okay, that's absolutely everything from my side that night. Again, I don't blame you at all for leaving me, and can't apologize enough."

"Thank you, again. I'm actually glad to hear this. I'd assumed the worst."

"As did I," Tina said taking a breath. "Can you please tell me the real reason you went back home ten years ago? It was ten years to the day when I saw you in the cafeteria, but you probably know that."

Ivan knew it was around this time, but really didn't track the exact day. He expected her question about his trip and was all prepared for it. However, this didn't seem at all like the same person looking at him with tears in her eyes, that he watched sucking another man's dick.

"Actually, I really tried to not think about that night. Look, that trip doesn't matter anymore," Ivan said, "I'd rather know about Tina, and when did Christie leave?"

"Christie left forever after I gave birth to my daughter, who was conceived almost ten years ago," Tina said softy. "Pain and grief puts you through a lot of emotions. I was in the anger mode the day after you left, and Scott was right there to get what he wanted -- the only thing he wanted. See, your instinct to leave me was bang on. Not sure you knew, but he was married, and had no intention of going another round with me after our one night together. Had me fired when I accused him of being the father of my baby. For the best... I didn't want that asshole to have anything to do with my daughter."

"You're sure it's his?" Ivan said.

"Since that was my one and only time having unprotected sex, I'm fairly sure he is the sperm donor of my beautiful daughter. Unless there was a condom breaking that you never told me about?" Tina sighed. "Sorry, yes... I'm sure he is the father. Please don't call ever Ivana an 'it.' Okay?"

"You named your daughter Ivana?"

"Yes, I wanted her name and her face to forever remind me not to repeat the biggest mistake of my life. I legally changed my name from Christina to Tina and lived my life with different priorities." Tina said. "Okay, I've told you plenty. Can you please tell me why you went on that trip?"

"You don't want to know," Ivan said feeling the weight of the object in his pants pocket.

"I need to know," she almost begged.

Ivan looked down at his coffee. "I went to my Grandmother's house for a few days. I went to see her and get her engagement ring."

"You were going to propose to me on Wednesday. That was the day we first met at high school," Tina said as her eyes began to water.

Ivan sighed. "I figured it was an important day, but not one we really celebrated or ever mentioned -- so you would've been completely surprised."

"You brought it, didn't you?" Tina guessed. "Can I see it?"

Ivan took the ring out of his pocket, wrapped in a small cloth. It was an old gold band with designs on it and a modest diamond compared to most modern ones.

"It's beautiful. I'm surprised you never found someone else to give it to," Tina said.

"Since you, my longest relationship has been a month," Ivan said, "I'm happy, not lonely, but... my work can take me around."

"Single mom, workaholic," Tina said. "I can't even remember the last time I got laid."

She blushed and looked at his face. "Sorry, that really wasn't appropriate considering our past. Ivan, thank you so much for meeting me. I bet it was hard for you, and I understand you're still bitter about me." Her eyes went to the ring as he put it in his pocket. Ivan was sure that she knew he brought it to rub it in her face.

"Christie...sorry, Tina," Ivan said, "I'm really glad I came. We were both young and stupid, probably for the best. I'm not bitter and I do forgive you. After airing all this out, I'm completely fine being in the same line for coffee as you."

"I'm glad," Tina said, "it will be hard to avoid each other. I'm sure we will have meetings before too long."

"Meetings?"

"When you're ready to start present rebranding ideas. You do know I sit on the board, right? I figured you'd recognize my name when looking into our webpage." Tina stood and smiled. "I need to get back, You won't believe how much sitters are these days."

For the first time in years, Ivan had an erotic dream about Christie that night. Her body as he fucked her missionary looked just like he remembered, but then out of nowhere, her hair was shorter, and she had glasses. He was so turned on when he woke up; he was trying to picture how her bare ass and legs would look now as he jerked off. When he was done, he looked at himself in the mirror, called himself an idiot and left.

Two weeks later, the project was going well. He did have meetings with Tina, but it was her and nine other people. He tried not to look at her too much, and she never really said anything.

The CEO, Grady Conner, shook his hand after one meeting and said how happy they were with everything so far after everyone else left.

"Thank you, Mr. Conner," Ivan said shaking the older gentlemen's hand.

"Yes, Tina was right. You were well worth the price-tag and more, Ivan."

"Thanks again," Ivan said, hoping he didn't look too shocked.

"She is one of the smartest people I know, and I trust her completely. As always, she didn't let me down." Conner patted him on the back and left.

That night, Ivan stared at his phone, picking it up and putting it down. Finally, he picked it up and dialed.

"Hello?" said Tina.

"Hi, it's me."

"Ivan?" Tina said, "Sorry, doing two things at once and didn't look at the number."

"When did you find me?"

"Sorry?"

"I talked to Conner after our meeting, I know. When did you find me?"

There was silence, and he could hear a girl singing in the background.

"Christie, or Tina, whoever, please..."

"Ivan, I'd rather not do this on the phone. I'll tell you everything in person. I hope you'll understand why... Can you please join us for supper? I'll text you the address and directions."

Of course, she had to know where the company was putting him up for the next six months. How, he was shocked that it was in the same apartment that he was staying, but two floors higher. He wondered how they hadn't run into each other before that day in line for coffee, after being in the same apartment building for weeks? He debated changing into something better than his old home jeans, but decided against it. As he went up the stairs, he received another text from Tina saying, "We will talk after she goes to bed at nine. Please don't say anything till then."

Ivan was greeted by the smell of fresh pasta, and a young girl with as much spunk as her mother did when she was a teen. She also looked just like her mother at a younger age -- except her eyes were sparkling green instead of brown like her mother. He was introduced as an old friend from college and learned all about Ivana's likes and dislikes. She loved writing and wanted to be a journalist. She also wanted to save the environment. Ivana reminded him so much of how nice a person Christie always was -- he'd forgotten about that part of her and why he wanted to marry her so bad in the first place. Christie wasn't the horrible girlfriend that Tina made her out to be -- save for one huge mistake.

Tina was wearing ripped jeans and a white shirt, with her glasses. She looked like a mom who was proudly showing off her daughter. She didn't really say too much directly to Ivan -- and never mentioned his name. He caught onto that and referred himself as Mr. Whitt to Ivana.

At one point of the night, Tina left to the washroom while they were sitting in the living room, talking about novels versus the movie adaptation. As soon as she left, Ivana leaned and asked, "Are you dating my mom?"