I'm Bill. My wife is Karen. We live in an apartment in western Pennsylvania. We recently were visited by our old friends Janice and Earl. We were very close to them years ago, but we both moved away from each other and hadn't seen each other for years. Weve exchanged Christmas and birthday cards, of course, and occasional phone calls and emails.
I'm seventy years old. My wife is sixty-eight. We've been married for 47 years. She has had two knee replacements, has had a hysterectomy, her gall bladder has been removed and her hearing is not as good as it once was. She often uses a walker when she is a little unsteady on her feet. I've had three heart attacks, but no surgery yet. I'm bothered by colitis and arthritis. I wrecked my rotator cuff a few years ago. I still play golf, but play from the senior tees and still have trouble reaching the greens. Karen is active with a number of local charities and our church. Our children live miles away; our grandchildren are teenagers and don't think Grandma and Grandpa are so important anymore. But we have been blessed.
Having Janice and Earl come for a visit was a real treat. Seeing old friends is a rare but distinct pleasure. They arrived on a Thursday for an overnight visit. They were on the way to their granddaughter's wedding in Michigan or someplace. I remember our friendship and the good times we had distinctly, but have trouble with near-term memory and kept forgetting when they were going to arrive. I ask some questions twice, even three times. Karen is still pretty sharp, although she can't hear very well. She has a hearing aide that she is constantly adjusting.
The interesting thing is that Karen and I used to be swingers and had swapped spouses regularly with Earl and Janice when we were in our thirties. After we moved apart, Karen and I never found another couple we were comfortable with so we never swapped again. We came close, but it never happened. We had a few threesomes, but most of them were one-time flings.
Earl and Janice were the same as us in many ways, personality and health-wise. Janice was having trouble with osteoporosis. Earl had open-heart surgery twice and his hip had been replaced. Janice had a replacement hip too. She has restless-leg syndrome and chronic dry-eye. Earl says she imagines her problems; he says they're not real or she exaggerates to get sympathy. Like us, they take more than a dozen pills every day. Earl and Janice are a few years older than me and Karen.
We spent the afternoon catching up with them and then had a nice dinner of half a pork-chop each and a small salad. The conversation was often amusing with our memory and hearing problems. We normally don't drink wine, it's not good for my digestion and it reacts to Karen's blood-pressure medicine, but we shared a bottle with our old friends.
After dinner, we adjourned to our living room. Earl and my wife Karen were on opposite ends of the couch while Janice and I were in easy chairs. We were watching Fox News and commenting on how the country has gone to hell. Earl really didn't like Joe Biden and wasn't enthusiastic about Donald Trump either. Janice just complained about why people couldn't get along. My wife griped about Congress being dysfunctional. I was just upset about the Steelers and their lousy offensive coordinator.
We reminisced about the old days. Janice asked if we had continued to swap with other couples after we had moved away. We told them we hadn't because we never found anyone like them. They had a similar experience. With Earl's job and with Janice being a school-teacher, they couldn't take a chance of a scandal ruining their careers. They also had children to raise and had to be discrete.
Janice admitted to one affair that had caused them some rocky times, but they had worked it out. While they didn't swap with others, they continued to fantasize about such things.
Janice said to me, "You know, Bill. You spoiled me. Other than Earl, you were the best lover I ever had."
I said, "Boy we had some good times."
She remembered, "I remember the time we screwed on the golf course at the country-club."
I added, "You lost your panties. I always wondered what the golfers thought the next day when they found your panties on the green."
Then Earl said to my wife, "I used to love to eat your pussy. I've eaten a number of women, but none of them reacted like you did. You would soak my face and squeeze my head between your legs. I was afraid that you'd pop my head open like a zit."
Janice said to her husband, "With your memory, I'm surprised you even know what to do with a pussy anymore."
Earl said, "Some things you never forget."
Janice said, "Those were the days. We still think about things, but that's all we can do."
My wife said, "I can't do cowgirl or doggie anymore with my replacement knees. If I get in a difficult position, I may dislocate something.
Janice laughed and said, "Earl has to be careful about what he does with my legs so my hip doesn't pop out of place."
We laughed.
I said, "Viagra doesn't work most of the time. I take two and get a floppy, but I have to use my hand to help put it inside her. It doesn't get hard enough to go in by itself."
Earl said, "Tell me about it. My dick feels hard, but when I try to slide it in, it just goes soft and bends like a noodle."
Karen said, "If he (meaning me) has a heart attack after taking Viagra, he can't take Nitroglycerin. They say it'll kill him."
I said, "I don't take Viagra, I take a generic substitute that supposedly is just as good."
We talked about the difficulty of getting a doctor to prescribe a 'pecker-pill' when we have heart problems.
Earl said, "The bark is still there, but my bite is pretty weak."
Janice said to her husband, "Honey, you still satisfy me. Even if you don't get hard anymore, I love the way you eat me."
My wife asked her, "Do you still get wet enough or do you use lubricants?"
Janice said, "We use a couple of different products to help, but my juices still flow when Earl gets me hot."
They shared experiences with the different products.
