A Legal Romance

"I tell you Angie, it was the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me," Christine said excitedly between mouthfuls of Caesar Salad and sips of Chardonnay.

"Well, tell me all about it girl," Angie replied.

The two women were sharing lunch on the one hundred and fifty second floor of the Liberty/Porterfield Building, in the most expensive restaurant in town. Though not always this extravagant, they did visit this restaurant a lot simply out of convenience. Located in the same building as the law office where they worked, it was just so much easier to ride the elevator up to the rooftop. As two of the leading associates at the firm, both women never had to worry about the price of a meal at any cost.

"I found it on my desk, neatly tucked beneath a bouquet of yellow roses."

"How many roses?"

Christine held up three fingers while suppressing an embarrassed smile.

"Three? Three roses? He gives you three roses and calls it romantic? I just plain call it cheap."

"Now come on Angie, he works at the prosecutor's office, he can't afford that much. Besides, anything more would have simply been too much, I mean the purpose of it all was the petition."

"So he's formalizing it?"

"That's right, here it is, an official Petition for Exchange of Sexual Congress."

"Well damn, hey wait. is there any fine print. I tell you now, last one of these I got slipped in a non-cum clause. The bastard left me hanging on the edge, when he came, he just pulled it out and started getting dressed. When I filed for compensation, he slapped me with a Declaratory informing me of the fine print."

"That prick."

"So you better check the fine print."

"Look and see, front and back no fine print."

"Okay, okay, but what's he say," Angie replied, taking a quick sip of her wine.

"Here it is, paragraph 2:

'

Proposed Sexual Congress:

Petitioner proposes a complete and mutually satisfying congress from initial sweet-talk and light petting through orgasm for both petitioner and petitioned in a variety of negotiated activities.'

"

"Light petting through orgasm! Damn girl, he's guaranteeing you'll cum."

"Oh it gets better Angie, look here:

' Then, based upon final negotiations, petitioner's erect member (throbbing cock) will be available for oral stimulation by petitioned until the moment petitioner plunges said erect member into petitioned's moistened opeing. Initial plunging penetration will be followed by continued and escalating pelvic thrusting driving petitioner's erect member into petitioned's moistened opening until both have achieved orgasm, if not simultaneously then separately.'

"

"Fuck girl. oh, excuse me, but..." she continued in a whisper, "fuck, you're gonna have a good time. Did you accept?"

"I filed the Acceptance of Petition along with an affidavit of health and cleanliness yesterday. You know what was sweet?"

"Tell me Christine," Angie replied, sliding to the front of her chair.

"He included a physician's confirmation."

"Exchange of high risk fluids? Damn Christine, he wants to come inside you."

"Yeah, all I had to do was file my Affidavit of Birth Control. He did include one assertion."

"Uh oh, what as that?"

Smiling, Christine leaned forward whispering, "Come here, I'll read it to you:

' The petitioner asserts that while his flaccid member size is of underwhelming size: one and one-half inches, the fully erect length of member does extend slightly beyond the average male member size for petitioner's race, health and general economic status.'

"

"Romantic and honest too. To tell the truth girl, I've had both big and small and I tell you, small is better, especially if they know it's small."

"Really?"

"Oh for sure, those big cocked guys, they act like they're doing you a favor shoving that chunk of flesh into you. Well the little guys, they're a bit embarrassed about it, so they work just that much harder to please you. Yeah, I'll take a guy working to please me any day," Angie said with a fake moan and big smile.

"You know the best of all?"

"It even gets better?"

"There's an Addit..."

"An Additional Declaration? What's it say. what's it say."

"Now calm down Angie, let me read it to you:

'

Additional Declarations:

In addition to the foregoing statements, the Petitioner further declares: Petitioner is not married, but is interested in pursuing a long term relationship with petitioned,'

" she read with a sigh.

"Damn, now there's a real romantic. I tell you Christine, if he is as good in bed as he petitions you better grab him and keep him. How was he proposing to get you both to 'Mutual Satisfaction'?"

"It's all right here in the

Proposed Sexual Congress

section:

' Petitioners initial plan of progress would begin with light kissing, leading to open-mouthed exchange of low risk fluids (saliva), followed by manual fondling of clothed and unclothed breasts, with some oral stimulation of said breasts. Congress would continue with invitation for petitioned to mutually reciprocate general fondling of petitioner's chest, and nipples, with either accidental or faux accidental contact with any erect members of petitioner's body. Petitioner then proposes manual contact and stimulation of petitioned's moistened opening (wet pussy) and sensitive nub (clit), hopefully, if agreed to oral contact with lips and tongue of aforementioned opening and nub. Then, based upon final negotiations, petitioner's erect member (throbbing cock) will be available for oral stimulation by petitioned until the moment petitioner plunges said erect member into petitioned's moistened opeing. Initial plunging penetration will be followed by continued and escalating pelvic thrusting driving petitioner's erect member into petitioned's moistened opening until both have achieved orgasm, if not simultaneously then separately.'

"

"Now you've done it, you've gotten me all wet."

"Well, he's addressed even that:

' Contact is assumed between only petitioned and petitioner as of the date of this petition unless the petitioner would like to offer the following exceptions, if any: If petitioner would like to bring along a female friend or two, petitioner would be agreeable.'

".

"Well, I guess even the best guys have a little perv in them. Should I be drafting up my own Acceptance document?"

"Let me have him to myself for a bit. If he proves good enough to share, we can work on a Petition of our own," Christine said, running her fingertips over the palm of Angie's left hand.

"Damn Christine, now you've really got me worked up," Angie moaned, grabbing for her purse. "Now where is that. ah yes, there it is," she finished giving Christine a quick look at her mini-vibe.

"Come to think of it, all this talk has me pretty worked up too," she replied, showing Angie her pocket-rocket.

The two women walked to the restroom together. At an adjacent table two other lawyers in the firm watched them. "They always go in pairs; sometimes I have to wonder if perhaps there's more going on than we think," one man said to his friend.

After a moment staring at each other they both spoke in unison, "Nah."