I was awoken by the bedclothes being pulled back, my legs being spread and the weight of the man straddling me, trying to push his tiny penis in. I could only turn and twist my head enough to look behind him at the next man in the doorway removing his trousers, by the look of him it was probably his Son. 'Family Outing', I thought, 'They all stick together'.
The big man grunted, gave one last puny thrust into me and climbed off, to be replaced almost immediately by his Son.
I turned my head to see how my Husband was faring in the adjoining bed. At least his day had started well, the girl straddling him was quite young, about twenty, the previous two Girl's were probably related too, I thought. His day had started earlier than mine had, as the rays of the rising sun through the window had struck his bed before mine. It looked like their Mother was next, as she was standing to one side of the doorway removing her Knickers. He turned his head to look at me, which was all he could mange too. I managed a quick look at his penis before it was engulfed by the Mother, Wow! even on one of our past good shags I had never seen it that big and swollen!
Our eyes met.
You're probably wondering how we got into this predicament, and how long the queue was, Male and Female of all types, creed and age, lining up patiently to shag either my Husband or me. I have all day, until the sunsets, to tell you our story . . . . . . .
It all started on a Spring Saturday afternoon doing what I love, Gardening. Digging out old plants, planting new seedlings, raking up the rotting leafs from the trees, potting and generally getting things tidied up. I was digging a small hole amongst the tree roots when my spade struck something with a metallic 'Clang'! 'Uh, Oh', I thought, 'Another discarded Baked Bean Can'.
Our home was built on Land Fill, though according to the Surveyors and Council was very, very old Land Fill dating back centuries, and was quite safe for habitation.
It was only when I dug up the object that this fact occurred to me as it appeared to be the sort of thing that Sinbad would have, a lamp, no less, just like the one from which a Genie would emerge!
Upon close inspection it appeared to be in a very good condition, no rust, just a coating of dried dirt, which was easy to shake off. Although dull in appearance the engraved symbols were easy to read,
" No Wealth - Only Health and Happiness".
'Odd meaning', I thought, and took it indoors to show Hubby.
He inspected it, agreeing that it indeed was akin to a Genie Lamp and had a very old look about it. "Give it a rub and wish for something", he said, grinning.
I felt a bit silly, but rubbed the lamp with my Gardening Glove and wished that my neck would be healed. (I have had problems for years with that due to a work accident that left me partially paralysed).
In total amazement I dropped the Lamp and reached for my throat, strange sensations were occurring to my neck and arms, tingling feelings running though them, and then a flash of light before my eyes. In disbelief I sat down, the constant agony and pains had completely disappeared from my neck and arms! I actually felt young again!
Hubby looked at me with surprise on his face, noticing the change in my eyes.
"You OhKay, Hon", he said. Huh! more than that!, I got up and threw my arms around his neck and gave him a lingering kiss, feeling as though I had a new lease on life, young, vibrant, and above all, no pain!.
I gingerly retrieved the Lamp from the floor and studied it carefully, lest it bite. It still looked the same as when I first found it, but what did I expect, a Magic Lamp? A Genie?, HaHaHa!, 'But then maybe', the thought sending slight shivers through me, 'Supposing it is', for there was no denying that I had never felt so better for years.
"Here, you try it", I said to Hubby, "Ask it for your problem back to be fixed"
Hubby was, as expected of all men, sceptical, and we did as any other ordinary people do, that is, say 'Silly you' and so on and 'this is the Modern Age of Space Travel and Reality Medicine but in the end gave it a rub and wished for a cure for his back.
He dropped the Lamp and looked as if struck by lightning, his whole body went into spasms and he fell to the floor. In horror I rushed to him and lifted him onto a chair. He shook his head and stood up, his face appearing drained of the lines of pain, which the years had etched into it. He held me tightly and said wonderingly,
"It's gone, the entire ache and pain has gone, and not only that, you lifted me up, which you couldn't do five minutes ago with your arms and neck being what they are".
I forgot about gardening, wondering what the Lamp was capable of, and studied the Inscription again, 'Hmmm, No Wealth, only Health and Happiness, well, that's about right so far, the Health bit', I thought, 'So, where is the Happiness, is that in conjunction with Health, why separate words'?