Playing

Over the Christmas period I had about eight weeks of vacation from University and hadn't managed to secure myself a seasonal job. With my university being 800 miles from home it wasn't like I could get a job that I would be able to continue when I returned to school, and no one was looking for a temporary worker in the small town I call home.

So, with no cash to play with and no job to keep myself entertained I fell back on the internet, and began looking through various chat sites, online games and such like. But where ever I went I seemed to come across the same problem; people looking for a quick cyber fuck with no regards for anything else.

Yes, I may have been in my fair share of adult chat sites over that holiday period, but did manners and talking die with the birth of cyber-sex? It certainly seemed so.

I could sign into a chat room as 'CornishBabe' or any such name, I'm not all that inventive when it comes to screen names, and within a minute I would have received several unsolicited private messages asking whether I wanted to have sex with them, or perhaps the worst of all, the messages that go something like "I want to bend you over the kitchen counter and fuck you till you pee."

Excuse me?

Where did common decency disappear to?

So, in order to pass some time in this empty evening at University I have decided to write my own guide on how to perhaps attract my attention in a chat room. I can't guarantee that it will work for everyone, but it might make you the only decent person in the room, in my eyes.

The most basic thing anyone in a chat room who wants to talk to me can do is to fill in their profile. I like to know who I am talking to, especially when you are using a potentially unisex screen name. If you are in an adult chat room looking for fun then say so, and be sure to express your preferences. I hate going into situations blind.

And yes, I have taken the time to fill in my profile, I expect you to take the time to read it.

I also like it when people express whether they are willing to read unrequested private messages. Some people like messages from strangers, it means they don't have to go out and do the leg work but others don't appreciate this. So, if you put in your profile where you stand it might avoid some friction, and similarly before you message someone check to see whether it is even worth it.

If a name catches your eye and you've read their profile, seen that they seem like someone you want to talk to and that they are welcoming messages then send them a private message. Or even just leave them a message in the main chat. But, remember that you are a decent human being, not a sex starved succubus.

Say hello, ask how they are doing and take an interest in them. Get to know them explore fantasies, limits, willingness and general compatibility. This doesn't have to be a long and laborious process, just don't attack someone with a severely over the top "Oh my god I want to fuck you so bad!"

If the chat room is proving inadequate, maybe it is lagging chronically then why not propose a move to somewhere else? Most people use one form of instant messaging or another and many of them are compatible. Just because I use MSN and you use Yahoo doesn't mean we can't talk.

Oh, and if you suddenly have to leave do take just two seconds to say goodbye. A quick apology and a "hope to see you again" goes a long way in preventing a reputation as a complete loser, again, this is my opinion.

What else is there to say? Yes, I often came across something I always saw as a respect issue. Respect for my privacy and my right to say no. Just because I am in chat room it doesn't mean I want you to phone me, it doesn't mean I want to send you pictures and it doesn't mean I want cyber. Why is that so hard for people to understand?

So, if I say no I wont give you my phone number stop hassling me for it! If I say I wont put my camera on then stop pressing the button to request it.

What are my top tips?

Fill in your profile and read others'.

Say hello and engage in some polite small talk.

Be respectful.

Simple, eh?