A merry Christmas to you all...
Things have been going at light-speed at our home since September. Things have been out in the open and everyone has never been happier. Though Sarah is out on the road a lot with work, Sean is finding reasons to stay closer to home now, after a trip to Fran's to explain things. Telecommuting is a wonderful thing.
Fran was very understanding and wanted to know all the details about how we revealed the family secrets to Benjamin and Sarah. She has the same delightful task to perform in a few weeks when Stephan turns 18 in the middle of December. She won't have any of the problems we had with the shyness of our kids- Stephan had been with plenty of girls from the early years of high school. Being mature beyond his years and quite handsome made him a target for all the girls in his class.
According to Fran, he could pick and choose, and was beating the girls off with a stick. One thing she wasn't sure about was how he'd react to the fact that his uncles and cousins were all bi. She had no idea whether he had any inclination in that direction, but she'd deal with that when the time came.
As a side note, the fact that all us girls (Fran and Emily and I) got pregnant roughly around the same time and delivered sons roughly around the same time meant that there was always a support system there and someone to talk to- but there was hardly anything in the way of hand-me-downs of clothing or furniture to pass along. We were extremely fortunate that in those days, money wasn't much of an issue. Plus, the closeness in age between the guys, and even Sarah, meant that there was always someone to hang out with at family gatherings.
Anyway, now with Sean at home more, we've spent many happy hours as a family. Our love for each other has only deepened. Sarah and I have spent nights together in her room when the guys had needed time to recover. We didn't mind an audience either. Aside from incidental contact when we might all be in bed together, the guys have yet to take the step of exploring together. Perhaps they never will- but its totally up to them if it happens or not.
Sarah spent an awful lot of time on the road in the Tri-State area working for her Aunt Fran. Since Sean was doing most of his time at home, telecommuting, he had reluctantly sold his beloved but ratty pickup truck to buy Sarah a safe and pedestrian SUV for work. She traveled lots but was home at least two nights in a week. It was fun catching up when she got home. For the first while, we insisted on total secrecy when it came to our new arrangement. Under no circumstances were they to talk about it with Aaron, or Stacy or Carla or any of the girls that still appeared the odd weekend or holiday to hang out in the basement.
At Thanksgiving, her girlfriends home from university shared lurid tales of things that went on- dorm room parties and borderline orgies and gang-fucking. They were all under the assumption that sweet and shy Sarah was still as inexperienced as she had always been. Sarah just smiled and nodded. The confidence she's gained in the last while has actually led to her talking to guys and going out on a few dates. She seems to be more liberated sexually. We have actually been introduced to the guys she goes out with, but we refuse to pry into what she might do with them. However, if she wants to tell, we'd listen eagerly.
Benjamin has seen the same growth as far as dating goes. He's been out a few times, but nothing serious has evolved yet. The thing I've stressed was a lesson from what I learned from my experiences with Kevin. It's nice to be able to go out into the world and be free to explore, but there would always be a warm welcome and kisses all over when they got home.
Schedules and conflicts have prevented my brother Kevin and his wife Emily (my first girl experience in my college days) from getting together with us. But we have talked on the phone lots and they have told Marcus about us all. They've taken the route of Em's parents- lots of flirting, open doors and partial nudity at home to break the ice.
Em confessed to me that she could barely keep her hands off Marcus once he turned 18 and informed about all their experiences- and options available to him. Emily wasn't Marcus' first fuck, but it was one of his most memorable. And there has been exploration on all fronts when they were in bed together. Emily wished that they'd all be able to get together at Thanksgiving, but she was working on a play until early December. She loved the idea of a holiday at the cabin, and came up with an idea I'll talk about later.
***
I must admit, the whole secrecy thing took a bit of a hit around the middle of October when I ran into Amy Clark at the grocery store. I had known her for ages since Aaron and Benjamin had become best friends in Grade 3. We had served together on church and PTA committees and the like for all those years until they graduated together. Any and her husband had taken Benjamin on many trips and they became great friends to our family. All our friends had been shocked and saddened when she was made a widow quite suddenly a few years ago.
That Friday afternoon I greeted her warmly and we exchanged hugs. We each headed home to put our perishables away and made plans to meet at a neighborhood coffee shop to catch up.
Maybe it was just me, but as we sat there I thought she was having misgivings about meeting with me. We kept dancing around the issues, with empty conversation about jobs and church and the weather. Finally I asked her how she was adjusting to single life. She said that she missed her husband in some ways and... no so much in others. I reached over and touched her hand.
"Amy... are you seeing anyone? Are you dating? It's been a while." She shook her head and looked down at her coffee cup.
"Oh, I just... I haven't got back into it."
"Do you... miss it? Or...?"
She looked up, her dark brown eyes misting over. "Miss what?"
"You know... sex."
"That's what I thought you meant." She was silent for a long time. She looked around,
as if she was petrified someone might hear something. "It's a sad state of affairs when your son is getting more sex than you do." A tear rolled down her cheek and she wiped it away absently.
"You can say it, Amy."
"Say what?"
"That you resent that your son... and my son-"
"Are having more sex than I am?" Her eyes flashed bitterly and she hissed quietly."I hate it. But I can't do anything about it. They're happy. But god, I hope it's just a phase. I wouldn't mind grandchildren someday."
"But what about you?"
"Me? I get by..." Something in her tone suggested otherwise.
"I could suggest something. I could suggest a few things, but..."
"Like what..?"
"I'm not usually in the habit of... Look, why don't you come for supper some night. Sean would be happy to see you and you could... spend some time... with us."
"That's a lovely offer, Jen, but... I should really be going." She hurriedly gathered her things, stood up and put her coat on. I followed her to the parking lot and when she pressed the fob to open her car doors I got in the passenger seat. "Jen... we can't talk about this-"
"Amy. we're in private here. I want to ask you something."
She gripped the steering wheel, the keys still in her hand. "Is it... about sex?"
"Yes, it's about sex. Would you rather have romance, or a good hard fuck?" She recoiled at the word. "I'm not leaving until I get an answer."
She still couldn't look at me. "Things weren't good with Phil for a while even before he got sick. And then it was non-existent. I thought about going elsewhere, but I didn't. I couldn't and now, I don't know how to. So yes, at this point I can live without romance but I would really love a good, hard fuck. But I keep feeling that ship has sailed."
"So come over to our place. Tonight if you want. We'll pick up some Chinese and make a night of it.
"You're suggesting I come over to your place- for Chinese food and... sex?"
"Yes."
"With Sean?"
"Yes..." I placed my hand on her thigh and rubbed upward gently. "Or..."
"Or..? Or you?" Her voice was hushed.
I nodded and whispered. "If you want. I'd love that. You're very attractive." She blushed beautifully. "Benjamin thinks so too." When I said this her thighs clamped together, almost trapping my hand in there.
"Oh god... how do you know?"
"Because I think the same things about Aaron. I'd love to have him in bed, Amy He's a lovely, healthy young man but I bet he's lonely like you. I bet he'd love a hot, hard fuck like his mom."
"Oh god I have heard them- and I've heard things... I listen..."
Her thighs were working together. It felt like being clamped in a warm vice. I moved my hand as close as I could to the zipper of her slacks and took a big chance. "I bet Aaron would love a hot, hard fuck... from... his mom."
She convulsed and hissed. "Fuck. I've seen him... hard- lying, sleeping on his bed with the covers kicked off- sleeping nude- God I'm a horrible mom.. so tempted. So very tempted..."
"He knows... about the toys... I'm sure he'd rather you use him."
She turned to face me- eyes wide like an owl. "How do you know?"
"I've given in to the temptation. We all have. We all do- and we love it. Sean. Sarah. Benjamin. And I. Between you and me I think we're better for it, Amy. There's no tension, no arguing- except over who gets the last piece of pizza."
"You all... all of you... have sex?"
"I've given up feeling any guilt about it. We all have."
"My god..."
"So. Dinner tonight? Call Aaron. I'll pick up some food and we'll meet you there." I
wiggled my fingers- still trapped- and leaned over and kissed her cheek.
"We can do anything you want. Or we don't have to do anything. Okay?" She nodded, eyes misted over. I have no idea if it was because of fear, relief or gratitude and I didn't care. I just hated to see someone as sweet and lovely as she in such a state of turmoil.
***
By Saturday morning she was fully aware of the potential. It was tentative and awkward at best in the beginning.
We hadn't expected Sarah home for another day or so but after we ate, Benjamin, Sean and I were cleaning up in the kitchen. Aaron and Amy were still in the dining room.
Sarah came bounding in through the kitchen-to-garage door with her standard enthusiasm shouting out, "Hey guys, I'm home! Wanna fuck, Dad?" By the time we had stifled her a bit, shushing her ineffectively- she saw with dawning horror Amy peering around the corner at the three of us.
She hadn't recognized the strange car parked on the street. "Oh, shit..." was all she could say. The awkwardness had just reached the upper limits.
She dropped her suitcase and crossed the kitchen and faced both Amy and Aaron with a stricken look. "I'm so sorry... I... its not what you think."
"It's okay. I've... I've heard."
