('window Seat')

This is a continuation of The Storm - Part 1 which also takes place in the year 2006. Jen narrates this portion of the tale. Read and heed the warnings from Part 1. Have fun.

***

I have a lot of regrets in my life. My brother and I shouldn't have put the savings and investments we I had accumulated in the hands of a son of a bitch swindler bastard- reducing the inherited wealth and what we had gained to practically zero. Luckily we still had the house and the lake cabin. Kevin and Emily were doing okay, too. They both had good careers and were doing fine.

I regret breaking up with Sean for six months back in 1984. That led to an asshole boyfriend who was supposed to be better for me, but all I got from the deal was a broken nose and a sprained wrist. I married Sean eighteen months later. And I regret not being able to tell my parents that I loved them before they died in a plane crash.

I regret lots of things but I will never regret any of the choices I've made sexually. These choices have given me untold hours of bliss and happiness. They opened a world of sensuous glory where I gave- hopefully- as much as I have received. Let the gods judge- but I will not be shamed by things I have done, because everything (well almost everything) was done out of love, affection and respect. Yes, a few choices were made out of pure lust and carnal desire. At least I never bottled them up inside me. From the time I was 19 and an orphan, I gave myself over to those choices.

And this is what I was thinking as I was driving home from work. I have a position as a teacher of ESL, or English As A Second Language. My writing career might have gone nowhere, but my love of the English language, and spreading that love has led me to many wonderful places. I teach at the local Junior College, helping new arrivals to this land how to communicate effectively in this frustrating and unpredictable tongue. I have also made a study of computers and I've made it a point to keep up, since they have become an invaluable teaching aid.

Riding beside me that September morning was my son Benjamin. He had just turned 19 and was unsure about his place in the world of continuing education. He didn't feel like going for a degree that would slot him into a future he wasn't sure he wanted, so he decided on a gap year at JC to explore possibilities. The gap year turned into two.

His problem was that he was interested in so many things. He loved computers, he loved photography, he loved sciences but he also loved goofy old movies in black and white.

It would have been one thing to be pulled in all those directions academically, as long as he might have had someone to share that with. A girlfriend might have been able to help him sort out things the way a parent never could. But despite being relatively handsome in a shy and geeky way- as well as witty and fun to be with, he was not blessed with the ability to talk to girls. And when he did, it never lasted too long.

Our daughter Sarah had hinted in confidence that his last girlfriend had dropped him for some unknown reason- but it was most certainly related to sex. The poor guy's heart was breaking. I think I was just the person to help.

***

Since it was just Benjamin and I at home that night- his Dad and sister were on their annual hike up on the State Park trails- usual dining was out the window. But he was so distracted I had to ask him twice what he wanted for supper when we got home. I could have cooked anything he wanted, but he was noncommittal until I suggested pizza. He brightened immediately and let him choose the toppings and where we'd get it. I fished a twenty and a five from my purse and told him to go wild. I said I craved a bath and hoped food would be here by the time I was done.

I decided that white wine would go best with whatever Benjamin chose so I opened a bottle to share and made sure I had one more on standby. I dressed in my robe and he was in sweatpants and a t-shirt when we retired to the sofa downstairs to dine on our feast and watch some TV.

We ate and talked with a mindless parade of sitcoms for background. After a glass or two of wine, he gradually opened up and talked more. He talked about things that didn't really matter, but he was talking nonetheless.

Talking, and watching. For every time I leaned forward to get a slice from the box, or to reach for my glass, I could see him sneak a peek at me. I had made sure that my robe covered- but not too well. I could feel warm air- and his gaze- on my breast.

Perhaps he could even see a glimpse of nipple. It was exciting to think of. I was starting to get the teensiest bit aroused- and I could tell he was, too. By the time I finished as much as I wanted to eat and leaned back into the corner of the sofa, I knew my plan had a good chance of working.

He finished the rest of the pie with my blessing, then sat back with a smile- thanking me for the lovely dinner. I reached for my wine and watched his eyes follow. I leaned back in the corner of the sofa and smiled, whispering, "Why don't you take a picture- it'll last longer." Kind of a cheesy opening, but it too went with the pizza.

He looked up with a start- he was busted- caught staring. He stammered, "I... I'm- I'm sorry, Mom." He blushed adorably. I know I'm dreadfully biased, but how could any girl not want this guy?

I played it a bit naive."Sorry? What are you sorry for, Benjamin?"

"I guess... you just look really nice."

"Why thank you! That's a lovely thing to say." I was genuinely touched. I leaned forward a bit and looked him in the eye and spoke slowly, so my meaning could not have been misunderstood. "So... why don't you take a picture... it'll last longer..." I lightly touched the lapel of my robe- and opened it just a touch. I cocked my head toward the upstairs and without hesitation, he took off to his room on the second story. He certainly didn't need a second invitation.

He remembered. I was wearing this same robe on the morning when our harmless flirting had turned a corner without stopping for the warning lights- and became something sweet and potentially taboo. But I had turned so many corners like that in my life that I hardly needed a map.

***

I hadn't even planned it to happen that spring morning. He was getting ready for one of his classes as he ate his cereal, fiddling with the digital camera he bought with money he saved from working at Circuit City in the mall. I came down in my robe after my shower, to make my coffee and toast. Sarah was still sleeping and Sean was out of town for work.

I was minding my own business when I heard a click. He was beside me, his camera raised. He snapped another picture as I turned and asked him what in the world he was doing. He didn't even use a phony excuse like he was working on a project for school- he was taking pictures of me because he wanted to. And I found myself liking the idea. It was sexy to have someone take revealing pictures of you. I let him take a couple more and I let him dictate the pose. And I have no idea why I did it- I flashed him. I showed him my breasts.

Slowly- not all at once, but before I knew it, I was standing naked in the kitchen of our home- stark naked and loving every minute of it- letting my son take pictures of me, holding my breasts, pinching my nipples and even lifting one to softly lick my hard nipple. Granted, my breasts aren't what they were at twenty. They do sag. Gravity and childbirth have done their thing, but they're still my best feature. They used to be just like Sarah's are now- full and ripe with light pink areola and nipples that get delightfully hard Thirty-six C, which on a small girl looks really nice and big. Still, now they're holding up well in my forties and attracting gazes when I wear things to show them off a bit. Which is, I admit, a lot. Sean appreciates it, too.

Benjamin was a perfect gentleman about it. He didn't make a move at me- maybe he was as shocked as I was. I decided we had gone as far as I was prepared to- and I picked my robe off the floor and covered myself. I kissed his cheek and made him promise to erase them. He agreed. I reminded him that I'd be leaving in half an hour and if he wanted a ride, he'd best be ready.

I was fine until after the second period of the day. I locked myself in the staff bathroom and fingered my slick wet cunt to at least two orgasms. I promised myself that something like that would never happen again. Unless it was completely necessary.

And now it was necessary. After what Sarah told me, I knew I had to do something.

***

I had turned the lights down low and the air was alive with lust. Benjamin got back in record time, carrying his favorite digital camera as well as the Sony VHS camcorder we got him for his 17th. I wasn't sure what he wanted that for, but I wasn't about to make fine distinctions at this point. I poured the last of the wine in my glass. He sat where he had been, the digital in his lap. I asked him what he wanted.

He didn't quite know how to reply, so I offered clarification. "Do you want me to... do things? On my own? Or do you want to... pose me?"

He drained the dregs in his glass and shrugged.

"I know enough, young man, not to make you promise to erase whatever pictures you take. We all know how that went." He hung his head. "Or at least you should promise to hide them better." I leaned back and slightly opened one side of the robe- showing off one breast- then covering up again.

He realized he missed a shot and raised the camera too late and took a shot anyway.

"Fuck," he muttered under his breath.

"Benjamin! That language!" I whispered in mock outrage. I opened the robe again and completely exposed my right side. I could tell he was sorry about swearing until I said, "You can say anything you want." I touched my breast, feeling the nipple harden at my caress. "Mmmm, fuck..."

It was so erotic. I undid my sash slowly and touched every inch of bare skin as he took image after image of his sweet mother touching herself and even masturbating before him. It was inescapable to avoid the fact that he was getting as turned on as I was. By the time had pulled the robe off and draped it over the back of the sofa, and was eagerly touching my shaven wet slit, he could not take a picture without touching his own hard cock before he took the next.

Before I could get too far into my orgasm, I asked- or ordered- depending on the viewpoint- him to show me what he had been touching. I watched him, a lovely young man- built like his dad, but more slender- undressing. I thought about grabbing his camera to record the moment, but I just motioned to him to move closer.

He did, but as soon as he got approached, almost like he was going to take the unspeakable step of mounting me, I touched his hard, uncut cock- and he exploded, coming all over my belly and cunt and the sofa between us.

A look of horror crossed his face and muttered "Not again-" He burst into undignified sobs and ran naked to the bathroom and slammed the door. I ran my fingers through his copious seed- loving the warmth. I actually rubbed as much as I could into my skin before I got up, threw my robe on and tapped on the door. "Go away, Mom..."

"Well, too bad, I'm not going anywhere, sonny. Do you want to come out or do I have to drag you out. We do have to talk about this."

"No we don't. I'd rather not."

"Fine. I'll erase all the pictures that you took of me tonight. And then I'll go upstairs and reduce your hard drive to dust. I can do it, you know. Remember, I'm the first of the computer literate parents. You don't want me snooping around in your filing system, do you?"

There was silence on the other side. "Do you? You can't stay in there all night." With my ear pressed to the door I could hear muttering and finally a faint 'Fine' before I heard the doorknob turn and he appeared, chagrined and wrapped in a towel.. I took his hand and led him to the sofa. "Sit." He sat. "Stay." And I went up to get the second bottle of wine.

I came back downstairs and poured us each another glass. I got straight to the point. "We're going to talk about this like adults, Benjamin. What did you mean, 'Not again...'? When did this happen before?"

He looked as if he'd rather talk about anything in the world other than this. I just waited. It all came out in a bit of a rush, like he wanted to tell the story, move on and forget it. "It happened with Bethany. She's a girl in my class, and we had been friendly but I had never asked her out. I figured she was out of my league. Anyway, last fall, I ran into her at the mall. She hadn't gone off to college, but all her friends had- and she was all alone. So she and I started hanging out for a bit- just like friends- not really dating- or so I thought. You did meet her once."

I did, and I wasn't that impressed. She was certainly pretty, but well too aware of the fact. I nodded and he continued. "One night after we went out for a bite to eat, we start making out and its getting really hot and heavy. I told her that I had always really liked her and always wanted her and she says that she could really use a guy like me. I... I let her know that I was, you know- it was my first time, but I was glad that it was going to be with someone as beautiful as she was.

"She seemed to like hearing that. So she takes me home- her folks were out and the place was all ours- and she leads me upstairs to her room and we're making out more and she takes off my shirt and I sort of fumble with hers. I almost tore her bra off and we're both getting excited, you know? She tells me that she really needs a good fucking and- and I get my jeans off and she's lying naked on her bed and I get on and... Fuck. I really shouldn't be saying this... I'm sorry."

"I've heard the word 'fuck' before, Benjamin. I won't be offended- or shocked. It's okay."

He sighed and continued. It came out in another rush. "I couldn't help it... she touched... me. My cock, and I couldn't help it- I came all over her. Just like... I did with you. But Bethany- she started screaming and yelling at me calling me an amateur and that I was worthless and useless and I should get the fuck out of her home and out of her life. So I leave. And then a few days later I see some of her friends at the store and one of them calls me 'Preemie' and they all laugh. I figured that it meant 'premature' and I feel like such a... a loser. I... I really don't think I want to talk about this any more."

I paused to consider. Inside I was seething, but I spoke calmly. "Do you want to know what I think, Benjamin? I don't think you're out of her league- she's out of yours. She's nothing but a little tramp and if I had her here right now I'd kick her slutty ass from here to next week. If I had a guy like you... getting so excited about the thought of being with me that he came all over my tummy... and my... cunny- just by thinking about it... and a touch- I'd be honored. And so flattered and I... well I rubbed it all over me and... well, if I was her I would have said that next time- when you do get inside me... that you'd last long enough to make me come at least three times..." I had to stop talking before I said something really stupid. I leaned forward for my glass of wine. I felt his eyes on me again and it made me smile inwardly.

"So... how many times has this happened before?"

He shook his head. "It hasn't."

"Not even with Aaron?"

He almost coughed himself into a spasm. "Mom! For fuck sake!"

"It's okay, Benjamin... we've known for ages. I heard you and him in your room a few years ago- and when Dad saw you- down here- well, we weren't shocked. It's perfectly natural." His breathing had returned to normal and his face was a shade or two less puce. "Look, Benjamin- I've had a long talk with your sister about this and its your turn now. We have secrets in this family to be blunt."

"Dad said... that he was- you know... bisexual." The last word was practically whispered.

"He was. He still is. And so am I."

"Fuck sakes..." He spoke in hushed tones of someone who's had a life-shaking epiphany. "And... Sarah, too... isn't she. She told me about her and Carla and Stacy." It wasn't a question. "So... its ok if I am?"

"Mmhmm. We know you like both. And Sarah told me," I whispered, "about you and her, too. Giving you a handjob- and the other thing. Sucking your cock. And its okay. You obviously didn't go off all over Sarah too quick, right? With Bethany it was a one time thing. With me, well, like I said I take it as a compliment. So yes, Benjamin it's okay if you want me- and if you want more with Sarah and its okay if you're bi, too. In fact we'd prefer it all things considered." I leaned forward and touched his knee. I know my robe fell almost open. "Your dad will understand that, too. I have a lot to tell you."

***

It took about an hour to tell the whole story. How my brother and I, out of sheer loneliness became sexual partners after the tragic death of our parents. And how we met Sarah and Benjamin's Dad, Sean when we had moved from out of state to go to university and get away from it all. Sean had been going with a girl named Emily and the four of us had got together and became lovers and that transformed into two new couples- Sean and I, and Kevin and Emily.

Love within our families became a recurring theme since Emily and her parents- and her sister Eden- had all become involved together, to the point of inviting us to join them in their home on several memorable occasions. On top of that, Sean and his sister Fran had had a long simmering secret desire for one another and Emily and I were able to move them both to a point where we saw that boil over into an affair- that like the others, lasts to this day. After I told him what he should know about our history, I asked if he had any questions. He was just sitting there, in total shock. He didn't speak, so I took the floor.

"You can be honest, Benjamin. How many guys have you been with?" He looked up with a start- as if I caught him daydreaming about the possibilities.

"Um, well... When I was in High School, I sort of went to a party and well, we all ended up in a... a circle jerk, I guess you'd call it." He shrugged. "It was a dare. We didn't know any girls to invite. And two springs ago, they had me and this other guy do inventory on a Sunday. We were alone in the store and we were counting things and checking things and he was right beside me and touched me- and god... we ended up... giving each other blowjobs- and then going back to work. Aaron and I have been... you know doing it for a few years. You know, looking at porn and... stroking and... sucking."

I said I knew and approved. Aaron was a lovely young man and I had a few random fantasies about him. "Has he... seen those pictures of me... on your computer?"

The look on Benjamin's face was all I needed. He stammered an apology and I waved it away. I shouldn't have been surprised- boys will be boys. "Did he... like them?"

Benjamin smiled, seeing I wasn't going to have him put to death. "Yeah. He said they were the hottest things he'd ever seen. He got... really turned on."

"Did you both... get off...? Looking at them?" He nodded, blushing. "I take that as a compliment, too." I leaned forward for my wine, feeling warm air on my breast. "Aaron's Mom is nice looking, too. It must be difficult for a single mom these days. I wonder if she's dating yet? I should talk to Amy next time I see her..." I was starting to form images of nice and naughty things when Benjamin interrupted my thoughts.

"And Marcus."

"Marcus? You and him? When?" Marcus was the son of my brother Kevin and his wife Emily, the actress. He was almost a year older than Ben, though his parents hadn't married until a few years later.

"Two summers ago at the lake. Well, your cabin- the one you all own together. You sent Sarah and I up there for two weeks. I can only imagine what you and Dad might have been going in that time... But Sarah had one guest bedroom and he and I had the other. And... well we were lying there one night and he started talking about seeing Sarah in her swimsuit- she was too shy or self-conscious to wear a bikini- and how he could see the outline of her pussy and how big her breasts were getting. I started talking about Aunt Emily and how hot she looked, too and before you know it we were both... getting off. And over that last week we talked about all kinds of things and ended up... touching... sucking. His is just like mine... uncircumcised.