Kyle got up from the dinner table first. "Hey, chill out, I got the dishes tonight."
He knew it'd be good to keep his hands busy, and give himself something to focus on other than his sister sitting naked across the table from him. They were still in "detox mode" after going a little too far together, and Kyle's balls objected, despite how often he emptied them into the bathroom sink. What he'd felt with Claire was more intense than anything he'd ever experienced before, and it was hard to suddenly put all that aside.
"You washed the dishes every night for the past week," Claire said, and he was surprised to hear a note of complaint in her voice. "Sit down for a sec. I want to talk."
He joined her at the table again, putting his hand out towards the middle between them, where she could take it if she wanted to.
"I know what all this is about, Kyle," she said.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, ever since we...you know...stopped. You've been extra nice to me."
"Why shouldn't I be nice--?" he started to ask.
"Let me guess. Being nice to girls has been a somewhat successful strategy for showing girls that you're attracted to them and convincing them to sleep with you."
"Claire. It's not. It's not that," he stammered, his face growing hot. "I wouldn't. I just. I wanted to."
"I get it," she said, ignoring his protests. "But...it can't work that way with us. You know it can't, right?"
"But...it's been what, thirty-five days since that last time, and we've done it. We've detoxed, right? We've proven that, even if we went down that path a little, we can still come back from it," he said. This wasn't how he wanted to end up making this case to her, but she had backed him into a corner.
"Kyle, you're making it really clear to me just how not over it you still are." She rubbed a hand over her face. "It's not easy for me either. And you're not making it any easier. But I need you to just assume that nothing like that is ever going to happen again. I need you to be the sane one when I'm the one faltering, because...otherwise we're not going to make it a year here. And worse than that, it's going to hang over us for the rest of our lives."
Kyle slumped in his chair. "I get that. I know we have to be careful. I just don't see why 'careful' has to mean nothing at all."
"You're saying a blowjob would do it for you?" Claire asked with a smirk.
Kyle spared a glance at her naked body. All the places he longed to touch. Imagined them conjoined, writhing together. He was firming up under the table, not at all subtle, since it was a glass table.
"Yeah. Absolutely," he said.
There was a long pause; she seemed to be seriously considering it. "No. I can't. We can't," she said. "I shouldn't have mentioned that. Besides, this isn't a negotiation. I need you on my side."
"I'm always on your side," he said, and he meant it.
Maybe it hadn't always been true, but it was how he felt now. Even if she didn't want to do anything physical--sexual--with him, he still wanted to be there for her. This wasn't some no-strings-attached hookup for him.
***
It was a couple weeks after that. When the sun was at its burning height, and the sand was hot, they took a siesta in the cottage. Today they were playing cards at the table. The cottage was air-conditioned, but it was struggling to keep up today. They would have been miserable if they weren't already nude.
Claire had her legs crossed, bouncing one heel, keeping her arousal on edge. It didn't help that Kyle was erect, as he so often was, his shaft clearly visible under the clear glass table, pretty much pointed at her, leaking precum. She had her desires largely quashed, but she still had challenging moments like this. Realizing she was getting herself worked up, she uncrossed her legs, and tried to sit still.
Kyle was looking at the fan of cards in his hand, or that's what it looked like he was doing.
"You're...uh...bleeding a little," he said.
She looked down and saw what he was referring to, a thin line of red between her lips.
"You never encountered this with any of your girlfriends?" she asked.
His eyes shifted to the side. "I've never really had...that kind of thing with anyone."
"What do you mean?"
"There was Sandra first. We were dating, kinda, but for most of the time we were together, it was completely chaste. And then eventually, once we were both eighteen, we had sex, and it was a whole production, with her mom making sure she was prepared and okay and everything. We tried it a few times, but she just wasn't that into it. Which is fine. And I get that it's not about me..."
Claire was quietly impressed that her little brother had the emotional depth to accept that. But the way he had acted with her had mostly been like that too.
"...and since then, I've only had a couple one-time things. There was Mary, one of my best friends throughout high school. And then we graduate and we're about to go off to different colleges, and she confesses she's had a crush on me since freshman year. So we ended up having sex once, but that was it. It was so hard to hook up at all, living at Uncle Toby's. The only other time was with someone named Emily, at a friend's party."
"Huh," Claire said. It seemed like Kyle had only ever just fooled around with whoever was willing. She wondered if he had ever been in love. But she didn't ask, worrying what his answer might be.
"Well, as long as you don't faint at the sight of blood, you should be okay," she said. "It's just a thing that happens, on a monthly basis."
"Does it hurt?" he asked.
"No, not really. It used to hurt worse, and then I went on the pill. And then since I've been off the pill again, it's come back just a little." She took some private amusement at seeing his cock throb as she talked about going on and off the pill.
"What about you?" he asked. "What have your relationships been like?"
She couldn't tell if he was trying to be a good friend, or looking for more wank material. And the question brought back memories of Greg, which she really didn't want to get into.
"I've been with five men before. Well, six. But outside these walls, it's still five," she gave him a wink. "There were a couple brief flings. One older guy who really shouldn't have been messing around with a high school senior. One guy it took me several tries to quit. And one guy where I thought we had it locked in, and he was still shopping around."
"What an idiot," Kyle said.
"That's a bit harsh," Claire said, thinking he was judging her dodgy dating history.
"He should have realized what he had," Kyle said, not meeting her eye.
"Anyway, it's your turn," she reminded him. "Whenever you're ready to finish losing this game."
She got up to wipe away the blood, but there really wasn't a lot. More of a thin red streak mixed into the evidence of her near-constant state of arousal. Kyle must have really been looking close to notice; it couldn't have escaped him how turned on she was around him. It was a little embarrassing for her; she was glad he wasn't pressing that point.
That night, Claire lay her head on the pillow, her eyes open to the dim wash of moonlight that filtered into the cottage. In the couple weeks since she'd given Kyle a stern talk, he hadn't pushed her. He hadn't propositioned her, or anything remotely leading in that direction, though it was obvious how much of the time they both spent aroused out of their minds. Maybe they were "detoxed". Maybe crossing the line once didn't mean they were messed up for life. The thought felt dangerous; it made her heart beat faster.
She felt his back against hers. They were being more careful now. No more spooning. No more kisses on the back of her neck. No more slipping into her in the early morning. She missed his embrace though. Maybe that contact had been tiding her over, in a way nothing else was.