Snow.
Blanketing snow, rushing snow, the carpeting kind of snow that lays deep and wet across the midwest. At first, a lovely tableau, a snowglobe brought to life as it created a winter wonderland out of northern Wisconsin.
Every day after, a frank discomfort, piled in parking lots and scraped from windshields. A dangerous and intolerable menace to all those who would hope to leave their homes.
Given my plans for the Christmas holiday, the storm served my purposes rather well.
I completed my obligations with rigor, shoveling, salting, saying things like:
"It's not the cold that gets ya, it's the wind!"
To my neighbors as they did the same.
When I wasn't completing house maintenance, and of course when I wasn't engaging in my masturbatory activities, I spent my time exercising, toning my body to the kind of yoga mom that young men crave. Certainly, a few weeks of calisthenics weren't going to make my 'mom bod' as tight as April's, but it made me feel sexy, powerful, and certainly attractive.
Much to my appreciation, the kids' return from Madison was staggered by a day. April had a late final, while Lee needed to bring his car back for some work at our local mechanic, so the lovebirds separated for the return journey.
They intended to stay for a full ten days, from the twenty-third of December to the second of January.
The night before Lee's arrival, I stood in my bathroom, observing my body in the full-length mirror, totally nude before my shower. I pinched at my muffin top, grimacing as I tried to maintain the image of youth and vitality I had been cultivating.
It wasn't enough. I could still see the stretch marks my kids had left upon my belly, the loose skin on my arm, the tiny purple veins which wended their way across the undersides of my breasts. I would never be a college coed again, able to crumble boys with a single glance.
Yet even as I doubted myself, preening and leaning this way and that, I knew my ass and thighs were gorgeous. I knew my boobs were larger than my daughter's. I knew my pussy was still tight and inviting, not to mention experienced with a lifetime of sucking the cum from men.
I slapped my own ass, hard.
Then again.
Hard enough to leave a handprint. My skin was still elastic enough to reform
'to take a licking and keep on ticking'
as my mother might say. I knew Lee would be powerless to resist me-
I stopped myself, suddenly overcome by a wave of nausea, by a torrential flood of conscience.
I sat on the edge of the master bathroom tub, staring at the light gray tiling of the floor, wracked with guilt, wracked with
doubt
.
For the first time in a long time, I really questioned my purpose.
It wasn't too late to go back, to return to my life as a normal, meek, vanilla housewife. I could pretend that I hadn't done anything, treat whatever lie April and Lee came up with as gospel, ignore my traitorous thoughts and the lust that came with them. I could become the woman that they saw twice a year and forgot about the rest of it, sinking back into the mire of my empty nest. Maybe I would forget too, a young grandmother to an incest baby I didn't acknowledge as such, letting my womb dry up and my desires wither in the chill of a Wisconsin winter.
I looked back up at the mirror, and I saw myself, hunched and tired, with dark circles under my eyes and a haggard look draped across my face.
Is this really what I want? Is this who I am?
I sat for a moment more, staring into my reflection. Then, with a sigh, I pulled myself out of the mire which had momentarily consumed me. I rolled my head on my shoulders, straightened my back, pulled myself up like a marionette hoisted upon its strings before returning to a seated position, but this time certain, powerful.
Shoulders back, tits out.
I was doing what I wanted to do, whatever I wanted to do. There was no possibility of me returning to a life of banal ex-motherhood, to disinterested masturbation to lesser kinks. I spread my legs, staring at myself in the mirror as excitement climbed through my body, the chill of the bathtub ceramic biting my voluptuous ass as my fingers combed the neatly-tamed bush on my pubic mound.
The old version of myself, the version with doubt and uncertainty, was dead. I began to pleasure myself, using the slickness of my vaginal slit to lubricate my clitoris. A sexual being of unlimited strength, a creature of seduction who claims the objects of her desire. I rocked backwards, one hand stabilizing me from falling into the tub, my legs spread into the air, my mouth open as I watched my fingers disappear in and out, in and out, then toying with my clit.
Lee was toast.
Lee was putty in my hands.
Lee was destined to take me, and I him.
I moaned aloud as my orgasm crashed into me, my legs locking forward, as though I were clenching around an invisible lover who had thrust deep inside me. I bit my lip as I rocked back and forth, an electric feeling, a feeling I craved with a more tactile version of my phantasmal lover.
A feeling of certainty spread through me, and I giggled, high and girlish to myself as I rose from the edge of the tub. A tingle was spreading through my legs, a testament to my cravings, my indulgences. I stepped into the shower, turning the water on full and warm.
I slapped my own ass again. No more thoughts, no more doubts.
Action.
Lee got home around eleven in the morning. I was at the door to greet him, to welcome him home to me, to the mother he loved.
"Hey there stranger!" I rushed to hug my baby boy, eliciting a grin and a peck on my cheek. I wrapped my arms around him, holding him close, tight against me. I held it for perhaps thirty seconds longer than would've a mere six months before, banishing the chill of the outdoors which clung to him, always astounded by his height and musculature, which I caressed as I allowed him to pull away.
I was wearing a light tan cami top and mom jeans, the kind that drew the eyes to my calisthenic work. I frowned as I looked him up and down. "First off, boots off, young man!" He was dripping snow onto the hardwood of my entryway, despite the mat, the hem of his more relaxed jeans also damp from the fresh snowfall which covered the front walkway despite my best efforts to clear it.
He smiled down at me, his strong jaw reminding me of Flynn, his shock of black hair revealed as he removed his beanie.
"I think I deserve a bit of a respite from the boot nagging." He shrugged his coat off, trying to remain on the doormat despite his protestations, seeking to appease me. I felt a thrill at his subservience as I watched him struggle to undo his left boot and not tip his stacked suitcase and backpack at the same time. "I could've just stayed in Madison..." He grumbled, almost tipping over as he dragged the second off.
I rolled my eyes, it was an empty threat and he knew it, Christmas was a time for family. "You also could've done your laundry before coming home, but I'm guessing that wasn't in the cards either." Lee looked guilty, and I knew his case was full to the brim.
He straightened up, free of both jacket and boots, clad in a classic tee shirt and denim combo. I loved the way the fabric clung to his shoulders, his biceps visible through the thin covering. I licked my lips, excited, remembering the last scene I'd seen of him and his sister, how his muscles flexed as he held her and how forcefully he rammed into her newly pregnant pussy.
"Mom?" I'd let my mind wander, completely missing his question.
"Hmm? What's up?" I felt a flush work its way up my neck, and I fought to keep it down. After weeks of fantasy, I found his very presence to be exciting, erotic even.
He gave me an odd look. "I said, what's for lunch?" He began to gather his discarded jacket, and took a step off the doormat, halted only by my exclamation.
"Hold it mister!" I pointed downward, to the soaked hem of his jeans. "You're not going to walk into my house dripping like that!" I made a stripping gesture, and it was his turn to roll his eyes.
"Come on Mom, seriously?" He fixed me with an incredulous look. "These are the last clean pants I have!" He protested.
I crossed my arms, even tapping my foot to look unconvinced, the spitting image of a mother who actually cared about her home getting a little water on it. "It's not like you're hitting the club tonight, just hang out in your boxers for a few minutes while we get things dry."
He grumbled something under his breath as he unclasped his belt, unzipped his jeans, and dropped them to the floor. I had to contain a gasp as I was treated to a view of his cock outlined in his boxer briefs. It was thick, and as lovely as his father's if the outline was anything to go off.
I bit my lower lip as he stepped out of his pants, I wanted to jump him right then and there.
"Okay,
now
what's for lunch?" Lee chuckled as he brushed past me, heading towards the kitchen to find out for himself.
I could feel wetness in the lacy panties I wore beneath my mom jeans. I needed to step back, to stop objectifying him and treat him at least semi-normally if I was going to do this with any sort of finesse.
But.
I.
Just.