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"Uh, mom?" I began, as Julie and I approached our mom seated on the couch in her nightshirt. We stopped at the edge of the pit framed by the couch and two loveseats on either end.
We had sat stunned and naked on my bed for what seemed forever, then Julie left to get dressed.
I went to Julie's room after I pulled on a T-shirt and jeans and she started to apologize but I stopped her as I raised my hand. After all, it 'takes two to tango' as they say, and I told her as much.
Neither of us talked about mom's bizarre, calm demeanor after she discovered us. We sat in my sister's room and listened until the water pipes in the house went silent and we heard mom walk down the stairs. Then we started down to find out the conclusion of this Twilight Zone episode.
"Oh, hi kids. Did you order the pizza?"
"Uh....I guess I forgot..." I managed, and mom smiled, leaning her head back slightly.
"That's ok, I actually ordered it myself after I thought about it. I figured you two would be pre-occupied."
I began to really worry about mom then, thinking she really lost it after discovering us like that.
"Ok, I'll stop being coy, I know you two are wondering why I'm not angry or surprised."
Julie and I fidgeted in sort of non-committal body language, as if to say 'maybe the thought crossed our minds'.
Mom patted the empty cushions on either side of her and we dutifully took our places as she spoke.
"Actually, I was a bit surprised when I came home from shopping and found your sister kneeling between your legs."
So she had seen us there after all. I mentally rolled my eyes and wondered if this was maybe a good time to tell her that I took two dollars from her purse when I was six, but shit, maybe she knew that too. I scanned Julie's face for a reaction to mom's revelation but my sister was maintaining a poker face.
"But that's only because it was the first time I'd seen you two like that." mom continued "Your Aunt Megan dropped me off and I guess you didn't hear me come up the stairs. I went back down and was about to slam a door or something when the phone rang."
"Let me back up a bit though." she said and settled into the couch more "When I was about your age," mom said looking at Julie as she stroked her hair "My mother walked in to my room to find me, Robert and Megan naked."
"Uncle Robert?" My sister spoke my thought, then closed her mouth just as suddenly with an almost audible snap. Neither of us could picture him in that situation. Our Uncle Robert was a great guy, but pretty straight-laced. I'd always just chalked it up to his stint in the military.
Mom smiled at Julie's reaction but continued. "We had been playing 'truth or dare' and eventually we 'dared' each others clothes off, and continued the game. When my mother found us, we were on the floor in a small circle. Robert had an erection I was leaning over Megan's chest with her nipple in my mouth."
I was struggling to digest both that startling information and the mental images that my mother was giving us. It was made all the more difficult by the fact that she previously had not spoken about her teenage years. Her next words made me understand why.
"My mother screamed and began slapping us and calling us dirty and wicked children, saying 'how could we do such a thing'. When my dad got home and my mom told him what we had done, he yelled at all of us but blamed Robert, even though I told dad truthfully that it was my idea. My dad threw my brother against the wall hard. He knocked out two of his teeth and broke his arm below the elbow."
"My father didn't seem to react at all to my brother's injuries. He just threw him in the car screaming in pain and drove him to the hospital. When Robert recovered, they sent him to military school, and for several years we only saw him on holidays. Thank god Megan and I had each other to get through those times..." she trailed off.
We knew Mom and Aunt Megan had always been close and the affection was evident in her voice when she spoke her sister's name. As I thought about mom's words, I wondered if their incestuous lesbian encounter as teens had been only youthful experimentation, or something more.
"I was never close to my parents even before that, as I'm sure you've guessed." We had guessed actually. Julie and I had seen our grandparents maybe five times in our lives, always during a major event like a wedding or funeral and never for very long.
"But after that incident, things went downhill fast." mom continued, "Robert never blamed me but I blamed myself. I also hated my parents for their part. I was always sort of a 'free-spirited' teenager but I began to be rebellious then. I started to run with the 'wrong crowd' so to speak. That's how I met your father. He seemed so strong and sexual to me, just the type my parents hated." she said with a small chuckle. "He got me pregnant pretty fast. My parents were furious of course. Your father's parents were old fashioned enough to insist that he marry me and his father gave him a job at the textile factory where he was a manager. His heart was not in our marriage though and he left me after finding out I was pregnant again."
She stopped then, her words still echoed in our ears. Mom's eyes still had that half-focused look and her face was slack. Then she blinked and took a breath as she leaned back on the couch and stretched her arms around Julie and me, looking at each of us in turn with a smile and pulled us close.
"I don't want either of you to think I regret having you though. You were the only good thing to come out of that bad situation. I never talked about this before but I wanted you to understand, now that I know you ah... take after your mother a bit." She finished tactfully with a knowing smile on her lips.
We sat there with mom's arms around us. I knew she wanted a reaction from us now. Julie and I looked at each other for a several long moments, then I brought my lips up to mom's cheek and Julie followed suit.
"We love you, mom." I said for both of us.
