Heavenly Love

Thank you for your emails and comments. I have appreciated every single one of them. I am glad that you appreciate my efforts.

I feel that the first times are the ones that are remembered most distinctly in one's life - like the first lie, first praise, first love, first breakup, first pleasure and pain, even the first orgasm. They imprint on our mind because we are young at the time of these experiences. The fact that we face it for the first time makes us vulnerable and hence makes it memorable for more than one reason because we are never the same after that. The revelations it creates in our minds help us to grow, in more than one ways.

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The 'slavery' did little to calm us down. In fact it had opened a can of things we both were too young to handle. I was very nervous behaving around her and she was anxious of making any moves. Yet the whole episode had showed us a vision of life together we had never dreamed. It was exciting and enticing just as much as it was making both of us anxious about the future that was beckoning us. Hesitation was more due to uncertainty rather than denial. Little to say, the few weeks went very awkward.

But we did manage to spend some good time together and hug for a few instances.

I came home one day with a big smile in my heart. I was apparently very poor to disguise or hide it since she asked me about it after dinner when we were trying to settle for the night sipping on our hot drinks.

"So when are you going to tell me?" she asked me with a very subtle grin in her eyes.

"About what?" I tried to pretend.

"I don't know. That's what I would like you to tell me."

It was very hard to keep the smile in my heart and I think I must have let the cat out of the bag when I smiled in my lips.

"You obviously have something you wish to say to me, but you are taking your time as usual to tease me."

I smiled again and tried to pretend very fruitlessly to deny there was anything.

"Ok. Take your time." She shrugged her shoulders and lay down sipping her drink.

I looked at her and she looked at me, straight into my eyes. Seemed like her aim to shoot me at sight was getting better each day and her shot was getting more lethal as we got closer. I looked at her and had to get up.

"Give me a minute." I said to her with an expression of a looser. She had killed me with her feminine glance.

I walked to my room and went back to the lounge with a folder in my hand. She was still calmly looking at me walk to her. I gave her the folder and sat down.

"What's this?" she seemed confused still.

"Have a look. I got an 'A' for it. It probably is due to your help."

As she glanced through she said, "Oh it's your portfolio you said you would work on."

I just smiled at her.

As she took time to go through it, I tried studying her eyes, on how they reacted to the pages as she turned them one after the other carefully.

At a page, her lips moved and she smiled. A sigh may have escaped her breath but her eyes lit like the morning sky.

"This is beautiful. Is that me?" she showed me the page and pointed at the pictures.

I just smiled and nodded.

"You are wonderful. I cannot imagine you could change them with such subtlety. You have done well." She smiled at me.

"I haven't edited them. In fact yours are the only ones I didn't edit."

She just looked at me with question marks on her face.

"What you see is what your are."

"You mean to say, 'what you see is what I see'."

"No. What you see there is what you are. I see you the way you are, for what you are."

She looked at me for moments. She gestured me to come and sit next to her.

As I sat close to her, she glanced in my eyes deeply for a moment, and she let her eyes fill with warm wetness. I couldn't bear it and I touched her hand. At that she let them flood and I could see a tear roll down her cheek.

She was the first to speak. "You are just too wonderful for me to deal with."

"You don't know how wonderful you are. I am just a mirror."

At that she slowly moved her lips closer to mine and planted a soft kiss. As she paused, she brushed her cheek with mine and hugged me close. Her arms wanted to wrap me all over her.

"Your identity remains anonymous as I had promised." I said to her after we broke our hug.

She smiled. "What did you do with the other pictures?"

"I have deleted them." I just answered with a straight face.

"All of them? Why?"

"Too risky. I couldn't take the risk. And I thought to myself, 'Why would I need the pictures, when I have you'."

"True." She smiled. "I would love to pose for you whenever you need any pictures."

That sentence seemed like hot furnace melting the iron of my heart. I felt warmth building inside me, bubbles brewed inside my stomach, and my lungs filled with air and I gasped as though I was suffocating. Her desire to please overwhelmed me.

"I click away every moment, everyday, with my eyes." I smiled with a wickedness to lighten the mood.

"I know you do. I was just referring to the times when I am not around." she smiled back.

At the beginning of Fall, the weather had turned rough. There were thunderstorms and it had poured heavily one day. I had spent time working in the garden. One morning I woke up feeling very tired. My body ached and I felt weak. The next day I had a soar throat and then it got worse by the minute. By the end of the day, my nose was running and I felt very ill. By the time mom was home, I was in my bed, and I didn't feel well. She took my temperature and she advised me to take rest. By next morning I wasn't well. In fact far from it, I was feeling worse. Now I was coughing too. I was poorly for the whole day.

Mom called me in the afternoon from the office but I could barely talk to her. In the evening she drove me to the hospital and they diagnosed it to being flu. But along with that, I seemed to have caught a virus for the throat infection too. That had topped it all. I was given some medication to put me at ease. But that didn't help much. For the next whole week I suffered quiet terribly. During the afternoon mom used to come and visit me during her lunch break but most of the day I was asleep. I didn't eat much, because I had lost my appetite. My throat hurt like hell and I couldn't drink much. My taste buds were kinda lost. Anything I tried eating tasted awful. She managed to feed me some soup in the evenings and her caresses made me think of eating a few bites. But it was a long road for recovery.

During the worst two days, I woke up in the middle of nightmares. During the whole day, as I tried to sleep, I dreamt that I was in isolated places, like a desert or at sea, alone and my mom was being taken away from me, in front of my eyes. It seemed like she was being 'escorted' away from me. Her expressions were of helplessness, as though it wasn't in her powers to stop from being taken away from me. All I could see were her tears. She wasn't pleased to be taken away from me. But her helplessness was evident in those tears. I saw myself just standing there watching it happen, without doing anything to prevent it. After she was gone, I could feel the devastation that would hit me. I would feel overwhelmed with grief of loosing her. And usually that would wake me up. I used to wake up sweating.

If I tried to sleep again, this theme repeated several times during my sleep. Some times I would see her in an accident, and then at other times I would loose her in a big crowd. For two days I could not sleep for the fear of these nightmares. One evening when she was next to me on my bed, I told her that I couldn't sleep and that she shouldn't leave me. She reckoned I was not sleeping well from my poor diet. So she made every attempt in encouraging me to eat properly that night. I barely managed some food. She also suggested that I was imagining things because of the high fever I was running from time to time. That day she sat next to me and coaxed me to eat a bowl of soup, some vegetables and some rice. Her loving concern was evident and her plea for me to eat something couldn't keep my protests for long. I gave in to her love and affection and ate from her hand.

The nightmares stopped after about a day later. Things also started changing and I started eating more. Mom was more than loving to take care of me. She used to check up on me every few times. Every time I received a kiss and a caress, her touch was tender and I could feel its love even in the ill state that I was. It made me feel so special. Especially when she caressed my face, she ran her palm over my face and my hair, it used to melt me and short of making me hard it used to give me goose bumps. The caresses were the best part of the day for me. I could have her caress me like that all day. As I recovered I asked her not to stay too close to me in fear of further infection to her. She laughed it away and said she had had a flu jab and I wasn't to worry about it.

"There are very few things that can keep me away from you." She smiled at me looking deep in my eyes.

"I cannot bear remembering those nightmares I saw when I was ill. I keep seeing your face in tears." I told her.

"It was just your imagination and the fever playing on your mind. Don't even think of it anymore." She caressed my cheek and planted a kiss on it.

After a few days more, I seemed to have come out of it in one piece. The whole ordeal was a strain on my physique. But more so, it changed the way I looked at my mom. One night when she had kissed me good night, I lay in bed recalling the nightmares I had. I quivered at the thought of them ever coming true. And then a thought occurred to me that sent shivers down my spine – what if by some freak of an incident, I lost my mom. The illness had given me a wake up call to think of what I had that I enjoyed so much. Of course it was just a flu infection but it had debilitated me enough to miss out on my mom's company. Worse things could happen. I didn't want to think of them. I had realised I didn't have time to dwindle away. If I enjoyed something very much, I ought to acknowledge it and reciprocate it while I had it. I had realised the threat of time and mishap. I didn't want to loose what I had with mom to either of them.

After I had recovered, I watched my mom with new gaze. I could see her deepest desires more apparently now. It was heart warming to see she loved me just as much as I loved her. And that is what made it worse; if I were to make a mistake in interpreting her advances, I would be jeopardising the one and only thing that I had in my life that I cared for more than my life itself. But her desires had been apparent for a long while. It was just my hesitation that held me back. The rational side of my mind was telling me to be careful as not to ruin things and the emotional side was telling me not to waste anymore more time.

One day, when I was home from college, I noticed mom had left a message that she would be late from work. She apologised and had left a kiss on the note. I smiled at that.

I decided to make an evening out of that chance. So rather than spend time cooking something in the kitchen, I drove out to the restaurant and got some fine dishes to take away. I came home, set a low table in the lounge, got the fire started and lit some candles all around the lounge. I set the table and waited for her to get home. She arrived about 20 minutes later. As she stepped into the lounge, she was surprised.

"I've got you your favourite, tonight." I smiled at her. "If you want to change, I will heat up the food, while you get changed."

She seemed to be full of bubbles. She hurried to her room and came out strapping the robe around her.

As we sat down, I turned on the radio and tuned her favourite channel. It was love songs from the 80s. She used to love that channel especially at night.

As we munched our way through the dinner, she ate from her eyes and her lips, feasting on the food in the plate and in front of her eyes. Some of her favourite songs came up on the radio during the meal. As she drank from her glass, she swayed slowly to the rhythm and sang along to some of her favourites. Her eyes poured out with thanks at such a wonderful end to a long day she had had.

"I wanted to give you a good time.Hope you enjoyed it today." I whispered into her ear as we slow danced at one of the songs on the radio.

"It was such a change. I like the idea of the take away. I would have hated to think you had to stay in the kitchen to cook all this."

"I know. And I didn't know how long you were going to be away. So I didn't take a chance to cook something myself."

"And think of all the cleaning up you saved yourself." She giggled, "I know you hate that."

"For you I would like to do anything."

"I love you." She flung her arms around me and we danced for a while. Our bodies were touching each other. As we moved, our hips bumped gently. I pulled her close to me by tugging on her hips and wrapping my arms around her. I stroked her back. She loved it. All the time she had her arms wrapped around my neck, her cheek pressed against mine, and her lips were planting kisses on my neck.

I had to carry her to her bed. She was totally drunk. May be she was drunk from the enjoyment rather than the alcohol because she didn't have that much anyway. But I think she loved the thought of pretending to be drunk just to be in my hands, at my mercy to be dealt with my hands. She didn't stop giggling. At times that is why I thought she was just pretending to be 'high' rather than actually being 'high'.

"Sleep here tonight. Please." She begged and pleaded me as i lay her in her bed.

"Ok." I agreed, "I will be back after I get things sorted in the kitchen and lounge."

"Don't stay away too long."

"I will be back as soon as possible. Sleep tight." I kissed her forehead.

"I will stay awake till you are in."

"Ok. Thank you for taking care of me when I was ill. It meant so much for me." I said to her knowing fully well she wasn't in the state of mind to think of it. I smiled and left her bedroom.

"I love you." She just looked at me and stared back at me with just as much love.

When I went back to her room, she was lying in the bed. Her hair was hiding some of her flushed cheeks, her sleeping eyes. It lay like a glacier frozen in the valley, waiting for the spring thaw. Her eyes seemed so peaceful and her shoulders lay bare from the robe parted downward. I couldn't wait another moment to get under the sheet and wrap the beauty that lay half asleep in front of me in the bed. I lay beside her, as she moved into my arms, I wrapped her in my hug and as we settled into each other's arms, I felt her sleep like a baby in my arms, her warmth and tenderness firing my raging hormones in me. I realised that night I couldn't do enough to show how thankful I was to have her. She was just too wonderful for that.

A week must have passed by. One night I couldn't sleep. At about midnight i woke up in a middle of a bad dream. I woke up in a panic. When I realised it was just a dream, I got up from my bed and walked to mom's bedroom. She appeared to be asleep. I peered across to her face and her eyes seemed to be shut. I gently raised the covers and slipped under them. I think I woke her up in that movement.

"What's the matter honey? Are you feeling ok?" she turned to look at me.

"I wanted to sleep here tonight. Can I?" I spoke softly.

"I would love that. You sure you are ok?" she looked at me, sitting up in the bed.

I was lying in the bed, under the covers and trying to hide the feelings in my heart.

"Yes. I'm ok. I just needed your company tonight. I couldn't fall asleep in my bed."

She just lay down and curled me in her arms. My face was gently pressed on her bust. I hugged her around her waist and held her gently. She ran her fingers through my hair and hugged me.

After a while of stillness, I kissed her on her chest just below the neck. I ran my hand around the waist and stroked her back. Then in a soft voice I whispered, "I love you."

At that she became motionless for a while. Then she gently lifted my face and glanced at my eyes. I looked at her with all the love I had for her. At that, she lowered her lips on mine and kissed me with a gentle long kiss.

"I hope it stays that way because I can't live without it."

She crawled into my arms and melted in my hug.

"Squeeze me," she sighed.

I hugged her firmly and wrapped my arms around her. We snaked our legs around each others' and she glued herself to me. Since her face was buried in my neck, she planted a few kisses on my neck and chest.

"Does this mean I get to sleep in your bed when I feel like it?" she asked me in a whisper.

"Any time you feel like it."

"I will keep that in mind." She giggled a bit.

After that night I started to sleep naked in my bed. I had hopes that she would slip in and I wanted to know what she would do if she found me naked under the sheet.

After about 3 days, when had I slipped inside my bed naked as usual, I must have fallen asleep after about 40 minutes. In the night, I felt a hand close to my chest. I woke up slightly to notice that mom was in my bed. I sleep like a log so I must have not noticed when she had slipped into my bed. She had spooned me and her hand was over my hips on my tummy. I could feel her whole body touching and caressing my skin. I rolled over slightly and tried to lie on my back. She stirred a bit, eased herself and her arm wrapped half way on my chest again. She was lying on my side, my arm around her waist and back. Her one leg was crossed over mine, and her thigh was very close up against my prick.

That is when I realised she was naked too. She must have slipped into the bed, realised that I was naked and so stripped herself too. I was very aroused by what she had decided to do that night. I could feel my prick now slowly standing up erect. We lay there for a while without any movements. I must have dozed off again. After a while she slowly slipped her hand down at my prick and gently curled her fingers around it. She must have 'felt' the growth on her thigh. Feeling her touch, I felt aroused, although I was half asleep. Her breath sounded deep as she realised the effect her touch had on my prick. She lay still for a while and then slowly raised the hand and lowered it again. She stroked it very gently and slowly a few times, keeping the grip very loose. Then she lowered her hand and moved it to the balls and cupped them gently. She explored them slowly and then returned to the prick. Now she gently gripped it and pulled the foreskin back all the way down. Then she circled her fingers around the crown and stroked it very gently for a few times.

She paused for a while still holding the crown in her palm. She kept moving her thumb around the tip of my prick. When she felt the pre-cum ooze out, she sighed softly, and stopped stroking it. She moved her hand back to my chest, as she snuggled closer to me, and she hugged me and sank in my arms. She kissed me a few times on my chest and neck and rubbed her thigh on mine. Then she lay still and fell asleep.

After this she didn't sleep with me for the next few days. So after about a week I decided to sleep in her bed.

It was Friday night. She had had a long day and she took a bath after the dinner and was sleepy very soon after. She kissed me good night and went to bed.

After about an hour of dwindling some time watching TV, I decided to sleep too. But tonight I wanted to sleep in with mom. So I took a quick shower, and changed into a boxer short, with no underwear underneath. The door to her bedroom was open. I walked to the bed, and noticed she was asleep. I gently lifted the sheet and climbed in the bed. As I lay down, I turned on my side to spoon her. I felt warm skin on my naked body. She wasn't wearing any nightdress. She was naked under the sheets. I was surprised at my finding, but so as not to wake her up at my astonishment, I just calmly lay still for a while.