Everyone having sex is at least 18. This story is a work of fiction. I made it all up. Special thanks to goducks1 for his help making this better. This is an entry for the National Nude Day contest.
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Chapter 1 -- Not Again
Dee calls out to me, screaming, "DAD! I need to go shopping! DAD! Where are you? DAD! NOW! I have nothing to wear!"
She finds me in the living room, trying to watch my small market baseball team lose again. We spend on a whole team what the big market teams spend on a single player. Because it is so uneven, we suck and have no chance. This makes me mad that baseball is so unfair. If only it were like football and everyone had a chance.
For the second time just this month, my daughter needs to go shopping because she needs more clothes. This makes me furious. I average shopping once a month for each of my two daughters. I have had enough.
When she finds me, she stops between me and the TV. She sucks as a window. A guy can only take so much. I love my daughter, but something must be wrong. I take her by the hand into the nearby laundry room. I don't see clothes in the stack of garbage, on the floor, or on the walls. I see nothing left in the washer or dryer. I take her hand, and we go to her room. Clothes don't walk off on their own, where else can they be?
Deidra, my other daughter, comes out of her room, "Can I come with, I need another blouse and three panties?" I imagine myself slobbering, smoke coming from my bull horns, and my eyes are red. There is a fire on top of my head. I am a demon in my mind. I punch the door, and it flies open.
She has on her bed all her clothes. I am an ass hole, I force them to do this, so I can see what they have. She has three single, non-matching socks and only five panties. A blouse has a big tear in front. I know better than to ask about that, her answer will only make things worse.
I grunt and walk out. Dee's door is already open, and her clothes are carefully and neatly laid out. She has less than Deidra. I look at her with disdain. How do you lose clothes so quickly? You put clothes on, you wear them, and then at night, you take them off. This family is very careless. What can I do? I scream, and both girls cower before me. I don't feel any better.
I holler, "Get dressed, we are going ... shopping." The last word is shallow in defeat.
My wife comes out, "Oh, can I come with too? I need some ..."
The anger is back, and she knows to stop. She is so cute when she is in fear of me, it stops me every time. She knows just the look to use, it works every time and then she smiles at me. She knows, and she knows I know, she won.
I mumble, "Go get your shoes on."
She rushes off to get her shoes. I don't understand how I lose every time. I had anger, I was on a roll, they are wrong, I am right, and now I am taking three women shopping. They could at least let me think I win occasionally.
We go out shopping, and it's every bit as horrible as you would expect. We spend way too much time trying on things they have no intention of buying. They spend way too much time examining panties and bras. I spend half of our time standing away from them and blushing. They tease me to no end, embarrassing me in front of an entire store. They hold up tiny outfits and yell, "Hey daddy, would I look good in this?"
My wife is the worst, which is surprising. She is cute, sexy, has an almost perfect body. Her personality is outgoing, volunteers a lot, and she loves me unconditionally. Practically, the ideal wife. I love her with all my heart, there is no other woman for me.
Her one weakness is in bed. She has a low sex drive and is very conventional. She enjoys me giving, but she doesn't return the favor very well. I love her tremendously. Me getting her off is usually enough for me. Sadly, it's a good thing it is because often we end there, leaving me hanging. I don't understand it. How can a woman that loves me, not give me any satisfaction? No ending, no cum, no happiness, and most importantly, no relief.
As the salesgirl rings us up, she lightly laughs at the sunscreen.
I am amused, so I ask, "What is so funny about sunscreen?"
She looks at me and is shy, "I just imagined you and your family Saturday."
She is on a different planet right now, I give her a blank look, and my jaw is open.
She turns bright red, "Oh, I am sorry. Oh crap. Stuck my foot in my mouth good that time. I am so sorry. We have been selling a ton for sunscreen for Saturday, it's National Nude Day. The forecast is lots of sun, and people don't want their ... their junk getting sunburn."
With just a touch of sarcasm, I ask, "What's next, National breathing day? How about National Walking Day? People aren't going to walk around all day naked, no way."
She tells me, "$374.85, credit?"
I was far louder and animated than I should have been, "What? How much? Son of a ..."
I get the death stare by my wife. I have gone too far. I slap down my credit card.
The ride home is silent. As I am walking in the house my phone rings, it's my son Dan. He is twenty-six but still living at home while his personal handy-man business grows.
Dan is always in a rush, "Hi dad, I am out with friends. I will be staying over and then we are going down to the beaches tomorrow to see the women. Should be great viewing tomorrow."
I grunt.
Dan laughs, "What, another shopping trip? Most of my jeans and shirts have been repaired from wearing out. That sucks dad. I don't think they appreciate their clothes, you need to take their clothes away from them for a day. Then they will appreciate them more and take care of their stuff. Anyways, I need to run, I will be back Sunday morning. See ya."
My son is a genius, he mentioned that my daughters don't appreciate their clothes. I see this with kids and cars. You give a kid a car, and it's no big deal. Within two years it's trashed, and they want another one. You help a kid buy a vehicle, and they put their own money into it. That car stays in pristine condition, and it is serviced regularly. It's like everything in life, they don't treat my stuff like they do things they purchase with their own money.
Both my daughters are 19 (twins) and going to a local community college. No reason they can't start buying their own clothes. I sigh. No way their mother forces them to buy their own clothes while in college. It was a good thought. I think some more. How do I teach them a lesson?
It hits me, "National Nude Day. I take away their clothes, they can see what it's like if I don't buy more. I will embarrass the hell out of them. My wife might join them, let's see how I feel. That will be fun to see. Time to make a list of chores for tomorrow. I don't want them hiding in their rooms.
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It's 10:00 PM on Friday night. I am still mad from a few hours ago when we went shopping. My wife and I are in bed reading. I get out of bed and ask my daughters to join us for a minute in our bedroom. They are both shocked and scared, I never do this. My wife is mad at me for not discussing this with her first. She doesn't realize that is exactly why I didn't. She would talk me out of this.