Secret No Longer

[ Dear Readers:

If you prefer to read episodes of this series without their predecessors, that's fine and I hope you enjoy them that way. Just a heads-up, though: It's not meant to be an anthology. All the episodes (except the first) build on those before them, so you'll probably conclude some things differently from what was intended.

Some of our readers' public and private comments touch on unmentioned matters, just a few of which are safe sex, STDs and common real-world consequences of things and events in the story.

Two chief rules in theatre are, first, everything on stage must have a reason to be there, second, everything that the action requires must be present, whether explicitly or implicitly. It's not much different in written fiction. By the second rule, if a story does not get into some particular issue explicitly or implicitly (for example, indirectly through consequences) then it is irrelevant because the author deems it so and asks the reader to consider that issue adequately handled without mention. Sometimes action may be simplified a little from what is actually meant for the sake of smoothness and avoiding distracting details unnecessary for understanding the scene. A good author has respect for the reader's intelligence and imagination and does not feel compelled to paint every scene in photographic detail.

In short, if it ain't there, it don't matter. Please remember that this is a story, not a case study or the news.]

SECRET NO LONGER Chapter 06

The next day I awoke with a troubling mixture of emotions. I really needed the day's time with Jannie.

"I guess we both need a little reassurance," Jannie said, once again displaying that uncanny ability to read my mind.

"It's just that it's so...so...radical," I replied. "I mean, there I was, ringside, watching you and Jason doing the ultimate, tits as naked as the day I was born..."

"Though a tad or two bigger now... Lin, first, I really, really do apologize for what I did. It was totally out of line for me to just yank your shirt off like that, right in front of Jason."

"It was a little over the top, can't deny that," I acknowledged.

"Is that

double entendre

intentional, Lin?" asked she with a sly wink.

"I wish I could take credit for it, but, sorry, no," I replied, chuckling, then, more seriously, "But now, about that shirt: I could have put it back on any time I wanted. I was just as lost in the whole thing as you were. And look at what I did afterward, sticking 'em right into his face, asking him to play with them even more."

"Yes, I know. I just felt I should apologize anyway."

"Well, then, it's no problem. Never really was." Whatever relief my words may have given Jannie, I know they gave plenty to me. I had managed to rid myself of most of the worry that had plagued me up to that time. We relaxed and sipped coffee in silence for quite a long time.

"Now, Lin, what is it? Get it off your well-proportioned chest and maybe I can help."

"Jannie!" I gasped. "Really, do I have a ticker-tape on my forehead with all my deepest, darkest thoughts rolling across it all day?"

"Yes. It's called friendship, and the love of a friend."

"Stop it, or you'll make me cry," I said, close to fulfilling the threat. Jannie smiled again.

"It's just that this is such a touchy subject, and I don't want you to get the wrong idea," I said. "Like I'm really thinking about it or anything. I just would like to hear your take on it in your own words."

Jannie toyed with the rim of the cup again. "Incest, right?"

I couldn't help but laugh. "I should have known."

"Lin, what else could it be that would have you up in knots like this while you can't even say the word without a huge preamble?"

"OK, Sherlock wins again. But really, what do you think?"

"Well, Linda, I am actually glad you asked. Maybe I can help, with another little bit of The Saga of Sammy and Jannie. Ready?"

"Ready, but first a quick question: What ever happened with, uh, 'Ben' and 'Rosie?' Do you still see them?"

Her face darkened suddenly. I saw her eyes drop to the table top as she began drumming her fingers upon it nervously. For a long time she was lost in thought.

"No, we don't, Linda," she said in a strained tone. "Things were great, and then, one day...well, after that day we never visited them again."

"Jannie, I'm so sorry," I replied quickly. "It looks like I must have stirred up some really awful memories. It must have been something very big that would drive you apart like that."

"I was indeed, Lin, something very big," she murmured. "In fact, about as big as a Boeing 747."

"Huh...?"

"Yes, Lin. That day, that fateful day...the day they moved to Switzerland."

"

Jannie!

"

Jannie grinned her widest victory-grin.

"Really had you going there for a while, didn't I?"

"Chalk up a big one in Jannie's column, Referee!" We chuckled over that a while longer. "So, then, what's the next episode of the saga?"

"It's this: One of the couples we made friends with and had some...well...fun with, was just a little, well, unusual. Really nice, easy to be with and talk to, but unusual. Let's call them Mark and Maria for now. They seemed to be locked forever in the radical old days of the sixties, except they got rid of the drugs a long time ago.

"Their philosophies on a lot of things, including sex, were way out there, if you know what I mean. Real envelope-pushers. So it really wasn't all that shocking when they admitted that they had sex within the family once in a while. With all we had learned about ourselves Sammy and I didn't feel too judgmental, but we didn't exactly agree, either. We all thought it might be interesting to toss the idea about, just for discussion anyway, so we did. Maybe if I pass some of that on to you it will help. But first I'll tell you that I don't necessarily agree with all this—we don't, Sammy and I, but there's some food for thought in it. Provocative enough to get you thinking a bit."

"There you go again, getting my curiosity up into orbit! Don't you dare hold back now."

"Or that cold coffee threat again, eh?" she grinned. "Heaven forbid! OK, then. I'll just make it narrative. Easier that way. And I'll just kind of merge Mark and Maria's talk together. Here we go."

" 'Incest is dangerous, very dangerous,' he said to us. 'Dangerous doesn't always, automatically mean bad, though. It just means you have to know the dangers, decide if what you want is worth the risk, and if that's what you decide, avoid the pitfalls. Just a little generic common sense, there.

" 'Of course, there are plenty of very good reasons why incest has been almost universally banned all over the world, and for such a long time. Dangerous as it is, and totally unnecessary for the needs of the species, such as procreation, it's been the most sensible thing to just brand it taboo and leave it at that.

" 'But then we all know how rules can change when circumstances change. We've all seen that happen all over the place, so why not here, too? So, Maria and I got to thinking about that—you know how it is when eternal hippies like us bump into just about any kind of social rule-books—and we came down on it like this.

" 'First off, let's throw out the real obvious sickos: the molesters, parents to force their kids into incest with themselves or each other, in fact, any kind of coercion at all. Then let's make sure that no children are born out of incest, with all of those nasty little consequences. Let's leave out anyone mentally incapable of understanding what they're doing and making wise choices.

" 'And then, from here, a recommendation. When it comes to sex it's good to stretch your limits now and then, try something maybe a little outside your comfort zone and see if you like it. Incest is an exception, in my book. I don't think anyone should try it unless they're fully OK with it already, at least philosophically. Does this make any sense to you?'

" 'Yes, I suppose it does,' Sammy replied. 'You agree, Jannie?' I agreed. He went on.

" 'So, now, what's another pitfall? Sometimes sex with a family member leads to a kind of emotional involvement that gets in the way of forming relationships outside the family. That can be a problem.

" 'But now, let's suppose all of these things can be accounted for. We're talking about sex among family members who are adults, well grounded in their own sexuality apart from incest, all completely consenting, and taking precautions against undesirable consequences like pregnancy or STDs and whatnot. That covers quite a bit of it, doesn't it?'

" 'It does,' I said.

" 'So, when you've taken care of all that, do you think it's necessarily wrong? Please don't feel shy about saying yes; we won't take it personally. We have quite a few very good friends who feel that way and yet they're still friends.'

"We kind of sat there and thought for a while. Then I looked at Sammy to try to see if we were on the same page then or not. It seemed that we were.

" 'Well, you have to admit that the idea is pretty radical. When you live to our age with society having programmed us almost from day one with this unequivocal message that incest is always bad, and then, after that, you never find any real motivation to challenge it, it pretty well sticks.'

" 'Exactly, and that's a lot of the reason things stay as they are. Like I said, though, it's probably for the best, considering how easy it would be for people to get caught in those traps when they're not prepared for them. But we are all free to think, and to choose to think differently.'

"I watched Sammy as he did a whole bunch of thinking, and then he said, 'Right now, thinking hard, I'll say this much: From what you say and what you have been actually doing, I'm almost ready to say that I can honestly accept it as good and right, for you, anyway. How do you feel, Jannie?' I was kinda so-so at this point, but not to where I'd contradict what Sammy said.

" 'That's perfectly fine,' Mark said. I remember him sounding very jovial, very warm and convincing. 'In fact, I'll say that most people who have given it any thought at all outside the box start out that way, and most of them stay that way, but some don't. It's a very individual thing, and I'll say it again, if there's any doubt, just say no, by default.'

"I saw an idea occur to Maria, and saw her whisper something to Mark. He nodded yes to it and then turned back to us.

" 'Here's something you might want to consider. We're having a family gathering on Saturday. Just an ordinary day together, you know, back-yard barbecue, touch football for the guys interspersed with mindless arguments about sports, the girls doing—whatever the girls do—and that sort of thing. Every now and then, though, when we get together like that, the feeling is right and we let down our hair a little—and, before long, our pants, too! Maybe that will happen, maybe not. Anyway, either way, you two are very warmly invited, and if it does end up happening, you can see for yourself what it's like. Maybe taking it out of the abstract and seeing it live and up front will help you make up your own minds, one way or the other.'

" 'Just how up front do you mean?' I said, just joshing him around a bit.

"Well, by now Sammy and I were certainly curious and intrigued enough to enjoy the idea, so we told them we'd try to make it, and thanked them for the invitation.

"So, along came Saturday and we decided to go. Dinner time came around and they set up a couple of big folding tables on their back patio to serve us all, pot luck. When everyone was finished, Maria stood up and made a big production of tapping a glass with her spoon and calling everyone to order like it was the Supreme Court or something.

" 'Everyone, first we'd like to introduce our very good friends, Sammy and Janine. We'll all introduce ourselves in a moment, but first, let me tell you a little about our last conversation.

" 'Our family sex is no secret to ourselves, of course. The other night we were all talking about it and we invited them here tonight. We told them that, if it happened to feel right, they just might see some of our little wickedness and they wanted to they could check us out and see what it's really like. They're here, so now you know we don't have to keep it a secret from them.'

"With that everyone quietly applauded. It was nice, easy. Sammy and I just smiled, a bit shyly, I think, and Maria went on.

" 'I'll speak for Mark and myself that we happen to feel pretty frisky ourselves tonight, so maybe it will happen. For our guests, I propose we have a little fun with it, to give an idea how it feels.'

"At that, Maria very suddenly and unexpectedly lifted off her shirt, under which she wore nothing else. Right out of the blue, like that, and for a second or two I didn't believe what I was seeing. It's funny how things change in context. Think about it, all the kinds of social gatherings like this you've been to. That sort of thing simply does not happen, right? So now that it did, it was disorienting for just a moment, and then it turned exciting. The impact was amazing; it was a hell of a lot more than just a seeing a lady putting her tits on display. I was getting pretty warm down there, and I did a quick check and found that Sammy was setting up his own Big Top in his Fruit-of-the-Looms. We sat there pretending to be calm and Maria piped up again.

" 'Now, having just done that, I will introduce our first family member, my son Larry,' she said. Larry stood up and gave us a nice greeting. He was a fine-looking boy of about twenty-five, very personable too. Maria then addressed Sammy and me. 'You may have guessed that this little extemporaneous ritual is to give you the chance to see a mother breaking the rules of convention by exposing part of her body to her son, a part the rules say mothers don't show their sons—well, above the age of one or two, anyway. Now, I also want make the point right now that this isn't a nudist thing, where sex is downplayed. I am specifically, categorically, here and now exposing these breasts to my son for the purpose of giving him a sexual arousal and pleasure, and I'm getting my own share back, too. What I'm also doing is showing you now awful it ain't."

Her forthright wording, clearly meant for us, was having its effect. I was getting some very energetic butterflies inside. The thing is, I was also feeling disturbed by the fact that I was not feeling disturbed by what I was seeing. Get me?"

"Yep."

"Maria was talking again. 'Next to Larry is our daughter, Christine,' she said, indicating a strikingly beautiful young lady of about twenty-three. 'Next to her is her husband, Al. They've been married for four years now and, I hear, are expecting. Can't see anything yet; too early; but we're understandably delighted.'

"Christine and Al then rose to give us a greeting as well.

" 'So now, just to shock our guests: Al, come on up.'

"Al did and stood beside Maria on the opposite side from Larry. I saw all three look at us with a knowing smile, and maybe a quick check of our thoughts, and then Larry sat back down and Al found a chair to sit as well.

" 'All the men of the family know how well I like the feel of a man's lips on my nipples. These two fine gentlemen will demonstrate.'

"All this was said in a very pleasant kind of mock formality, which actually made it all warmer and more personal. As we watched, the men did just as she said, each touching Maria's sides and then working their way to her breasts. They began touching them and working the nipples with their lips and tongues with no shyness whatever, while all present looked on with great interest, including Sammy and me. We saw Maria responding very well, and particularly, very genuinely; even though they might have chosen to do this particular thing for our benefit, the action before us was most definitely real.

"Al and Larry continued to pleasure Maria's breasts for a couple of minutes, then quietly stopped. Al returned to his seat beside his beaming wife.

" 'I'm pretty sure this little example of pleasure did not offend you. Am I right?' The quiver in her voice was unmistakable testimony to the efficacy of the sensual attentions which had just been given to her.

"Sammy was quite impressed, not to mention hard as Gibraltar under the table. 'Not at all, Maria. Like you said, seeing it like this does seem to strip away some of the stigma,' he said cautiously

" 'Good. We hoped you'd see it that way. No promises, but you may see more as the night progresses.

" 'Next are Nathan and Rita. Nathan is my brother and Rita is his wife.'

"They then greeted us. Nathan was about forty-five, somewhat younger than Maria. Rita was somewhere between thirty-five and forty. Both were very personable and quite attractive in a couple-next-door kind of way.

"Then they served dessert and after that, everyone wandered back into the house and started into various ordinary activities.

" 'What do you think of all this, Jannie?' I heard Sammy whisper.

" 'I'm not ready to buy into their whole philosophy, but I have to admit that it's like you say to me, too. I'm amazed that I wasn't shocked or appalled the way I might have expected before.'

" 'Same here. I wonder what other surprises the night will bring.'

"Now I'll fast-forward past an hour or two of quite ordinary socializing. Sammy and I were seated on a sofa. Mark and Maria came over.

" 'Would you like to see some more of what we do?'

" 'I'll admit frankly that I'm very curious now. Not sure exactly what to think, but at least I can say that it isn't negative,' I replied.

"She patted my arm. 'Good, because Mark and I have discovered that we are, at this moment, very horny, and would like to do something about it.'

"Sammy started laughing. 'You don't mince words, do you?'

" 'Nope. Never have,' Mark said.

"Mark was sitting on an easy chair. I saw Christine, their daughter, come up and put her hands on his shoulder and give him a soft kiss on the forehead. It was easy, pleasant to see.

" 'Thank you, my dear,' he replied and kissed her back, then gave her a playful tug on the arm. She squealed gleefully like a little girl and plopped herself in her father's lap. She wrapped her arms around the back of his head and he started nuzzling her neck and tickling her with his lips. She laughed and wiggled from the tickling.

" 'Daddy, your aim is slipping. Here's where you should be doing that.'

"With that she started working on some buttons on the front of her dress. Al, her husband, who had been standing behind them enjoying the scene then quickly reached down to pull down the zipper of the dress behind her. In a moment she had loosened up the dress enough to pull it aside and reveal her breasts. Easily and sweetly, Mark moved town to her breasts and resumed the tickling on her nipples. She wriggled even more.

" 'Enough of that, Daddy! Time for the good stuff.'

" 'If you insist, my dear, if you insist,' he replied, then changed the tickling motions to tender kisses while commencing soft caresses of his daughter's breasts.

"I couldn't help finding it exciting. I felt almost guilty for feeling that, as if I was supposed to be ashamed of even tolerating it, but it just was a turn-on. I satisfied myself that it was other people doing it and that we were just tuning into it as observers. Sammy was doing his own version of something similar. We were growing more and more accepting of it.

"We knew that our presence was having some influence on the proceedings; they were choosing some of the details of their actions to demonstrate their behavior and philosophy to us. Even so, we could tell that overall it was just what they had learned to accept and practice.