Warren the Wizard

LEARNING AND SETTLING IN

BY SW MO HERMIT

Warren wandered down the crowded street enjoying the renaissance festival's version of middle ages music and the period costumes. This was his favorite time and festival of the year, the annual renaissance festival held by his home town. He was super happy to be there this year and wondered if he would be able to attend the next one or any of the other festivals coming up in the future. He sighed and berated himself once again for being the unbendable ethical asshole he was accused of being just before his boss laid him off.

If he hadn't already paid a non refundable entrance fee for this year's festival he couldn't have afforded to attend. As it was, he had to watch his expenses and not buy as much beer or as many snacks as he normally did. Thankfully, he owned the Wizards costume that he wore year after year so the only expense he had was the gasoline he used to get to the festival and, of course, food and drink. He was good enough friends with some of the performers and concessioners he could and did sleep in their tents or caravans.

Warren was the typical computer nerd. He worked programming games during the day then talked about and played them evenings and weekends. He loved online role playing games and fairs and festivals such as this one. Every chance he got he played the part of a Wizard in the games and dressed as one for the festivals and parties he attended if it was appropriate. He had many of the "spells" memorized and carried a few "props" and harmless chemicals to either make a noise or smoke from time to time. He, like many of his friends, was on a first name basis with many of the magic shop employees in the city and a few who worked in herb shops as well.

On his way down the street he stopped from time to time for a chat with some of the many friends he made over the years as well as some people he didn't know who either had an interesting costume or stopped him to talk about his. He also read many of the notices nailed up on bulletin boards and trees. One notice that caught his eye he found very intriguing. It said, "WANTED: Wizard to join the population of a medieval town. The successful applicant Will provide magical services to the townspeople on an as needed basis. If possible the applicant should bring his own potions, reagents and tools of the trade. An appropriate familiar is a welcome plus. Come join our town for a fun and enjoyable job in a slower time."

Warren couldn't see how this could be a real paying proposition but he wrote the phone number and address down so he could call as soon as he found a quiet place to do so. Since he was unemployed he thought he'd see what the job entailed and perhaps give it a try. It would be a hoot to play a Wizard until he found another job in programming. He was pretty sure, if the ad was for a real job it was seasonal and probably part time but any job would be good while he searched for another one in his field. Depending on the salary, it would sure beat flipping burgers.

Warren had a pet iguana that he would cast as his familiar. The little bastard loved to ride around in his pocket or on his shoulder. In fact, it was with him now. He called it a dragon if asked. As soon as he found a quiet spot he made the call. When the phone was answered Warren could barely understand the man. He was carrying midevial speech to extremes, apparently to stay in character.

"Aye, Sir Wizard," the man said. "'Tis an opportune time for your call, it is. I be doing naught that cannot be put off should you be able to come to my stall for a talk."

"Oh, yeah, guess I can do that. What time?"

"Why now Sir Wizard."

Warren obtained directions to the man's stall and began walking to his interview. It was only three or four blocks from where he made the call so it didn't take long to get there. When he arrived, he was impressed. The items for sale looked almost authentic and were obviously hand made. He almost forgot why he was there when he began wandering around looking at the pots, pans, camping gear, daggers, clubs, leather goods and homespun clothes. This was really an awesome shop. It seemed to contain anything and everything the well equipped reenactor could want with the exception of weapons and armor.

Warren was dividing his time between looking at the merchandise and an extremely beautiful young woman in period costume who apparently worked in the shop. A man of indeterminate age approached and asked if he could help. Warren said, "Yes. I called about the Wizard's job?"

"Oh, aye. Please, this way. We'll sit a spell and have some ale while we talk about the work. Me missus is in the back. We'll just join her while my daughter minds the stall if you mind not."

Warren smiled and said, "That's fine. Lead on McDuff."

They walked into the back of the stall and passed through a doorway covered by a heavy curtain or light blanket. Just before they left the front of the stall the man said, "Gloria, mind the shop while we talk with this young Wizard." The small room they entered was plain and contained period appropriate furnishings for the middle ages, again seemingly hand made. An older woman sat at a table covered with all sorts of items from scrolls to small bottles of, well of who knows what.

After they were all seated they had a short get to know each other conversation. Before he realized what was happening Warren found himself being well and truly interviewed about his life, beliefs, knowledge of the middle ages and "magic". Of course, he could do well with all the questions except for a knowledge of magic. For the, he merely spouted the knowledge he had gained by programing and playing the computer games or by wandering around the fairs and festivals.

After a grueling 45 minute discussion the man looked at the woman and asked, "Well dear. What do you think?"

The shopkeeper's wife looked into a crystal ball Warren hadn't noticed before before she said, "He appears to be acceptable. He has paltry knowledge of the magic but the power is strong, very strong, in this one. He should do well if he doesn't get himself killed before he learns what's needed. He has no entanglements in this reality. Yes, he'll do fine. It's time for Gloria to take a man in any event. Though she's not a full sorceress, she can safeguard and teach him until he becomes proficient on his own and I perceive they'll do well together."

Warren looked at the two with a small amount of fear and started to ask what they were talking about when the man stood and said, "So be it." He picked up a wizards staff, spoke an incantation, and Warren found himself in a beautiful forest glade. He fell to the ground in shock when his mind registered the change.

*****

As quickly as he and Warren disappeared, the shopkeeper popped back into the stall. Most people wouldn't have even noticed he disappeared and reappeared. When he appeared, he said, "Well my dear, I suppose we'd better tell Gloria and get her to her man before he manages to get into trouble."

The old man and his wife walked into the front of the stall. The young woman was flirting with two young men dressed as well to do dandies. When they saw the man and woman walk up to them they decided they needed to move on. Gloria turned to her parents as her father began to speak, "Gloria, child, 'tis time for you to take a husband. We know you've began feeling your womanly needs and that young man needs a woman and someone to instruct him in his duties.

"Your mother tells me you two are well matched and Will do well as a mated couple. Gather your things and be quick about it. I want to take you to him before he manages to get into trouble."

"Father! Please, NO. I know him not and I'm not ready to be mated. I..."

"That's enough child. It's done. We've recorded the pairing with the Lady already and she's approved. Now, let's be off."

After a heavy sigh, she said, "Yes Father," and quickly scurried around picking up this and that before stuffing it into a pack that seemingly appeared out of thin air. Finally, the said, "I'm ready, Father."

*****

Warren's heart was racing as he looked around wondering what the heck happened. All at once, the young woman he saw in the front of the stall and the old man who interviewed him appeared in the center of the glade. He barely noticed the man before he blinked out of sight once more. The young woman looked around, saw him and scowled before beginning to walk toward him. She said, "There you are. Don't just sit there Wizard. Up with you. We must be off. 'Tis a fair walk to the safety of town and we must make it ere darkness falls."

"What? Uh, where are we and how the heck did I get here?"

"Are you daft man? We're in the woods outside town. Papa sent us this far on the way to your new job and our new home. You know, the job you applied for as resident Wizard of Tommy's Crossing? Now come on. We must be off HUSBAND."

Warren had no idea what to say. Finally, he just moved up beside the woman and began to walk with her as she headed down a faint trail leading deeper into the woods. The first thing he thought to ask was, "You called me Husband a moment ago. I thought I heard your mother say it was time for you to be taken by a man just before I appeared here. What's the story with that?"

"What do you think HUSBAND? Didst thou not hear my family give me to you, not caring about my wants and desires? 'Tis always the way with us. When it's time the father gives the daughter to her man though most do ask her thoughts on the subject unlike MY father did."

"Okaaaay. And about this job. I never said I would take it. We never discussed location or hours or pay or anything else about it. Maybe you can fill me in on that as well?"

"Why it pays whatever you care to charge if its agreeable to your customer. The hours are as you choose. We must find a place to live when we get to Tommy's Crossing but that shouldn't be difficult. There was once a wizard in residence but he just disappeared. Perhaps we can just take over his abode, perhaps some other. We shall see."

As they walked on, Warren began peppering her with other questions. None of the answers made a lot of sense to him but she did grudgingly, it seemed, answer his questions.

Warren discovered, if she was to be believed, that magic DID work here, the woods were dangerous, filled with brigands, bands of elves, most of whom disliked humans, and vicious Wild animals. As they walked, she began trying to teach him simple magic incantations that supposedly worked. Well, heck, he knew some of them worked because he saw them.

He paid minimal attention to much of what she told him, still in shock over his seeming marriage to this young woman. He was unsure what to make of the fact and how to act although she was a very pretty young woman and his body knew how IT wanted him to act. In fact, considering his past record with girlfriends he was pretty sure he DIDN'T want to be married.

Warren wasn't your typical nerd. He liked, some would say, he loved women; maybe too much. He was shy but after a woman and he broke the ice, he could talk to them with the best and he bedded more than his share. Therein lay the problem. He wasn't a womanizer or predator, per se but if the feeling and opportunity struck, he WOULD bed any woman he desired. This, of course, tended to make his girlfriends angry and they broke up with him. After thinking of this and knowing he would do the same here, he said, "I don't know about this marriage thing. Maybe we should just split up and go our own way, tell your father it just didn't work out. I'm not the monogamous type. I tend to, uh, spread myself around as it were if I get the chance."

Gloria stopped and stared at him in shock before she shouted, "NO. WE CANNOT!"

"What? Why?"

"Why? Why? You ignorant...". Gloria sighed and started over in a quieter voice, saying, "Because, Husband, it is done. Father gave me to you and the Lady approved. Mother, the seer, saw we would do well together. I'm sure we'll learn to get along and we might even find some feelings for each other in due time. Now, please, let us move onward. We can continue learning of each other while you learn that which I can teach you about your new position. As for your spreading yourself around as you say, 'twas always thus, more so with wizards than some others but men in particular do tend to do such. Women just have to accept it should their men doing so bother them."

Gloria grinned and looked at Warren before continuing, "Some of us though it bothers not. Mayhap we could share?"

Warren sputtered a moment and said, "You mean, uh."

"Yes Husband. I have never been with a man, not that I'm against it but I have pleasured and been pleasured by many of my lady friends."

"Wow." They walked onward in silence for several moments before their conversation picked up once again as Gloria kept giving information to Warren. She told him what to expect and how to act in his new world, hoping he would learn and survive.

Truthfully, what Gloria told him didn't really surprise him because it followed along with what he knew from the games he played and dovetailed with his knowledge, however wrong it might be, of the middle ages. He was hesitant to use violence for real but thought, hoped, he could do so if it was called for. He was sure he could summon a spell (assuming they REALLY did work). When he was younger he did fight a time or two to protect himself and he got the rudiments of unarmed combat and knife fighting while in the army.

It was almost full dark when they finally arrived at a (to Warren) small and dirty town. Gloria said, "Finally. We have arrived Husband. This is Tommy's Crossing, our new home."

They walked down the dusty street heading toward an Inn Gloria said would be their temporary home until they could find permanent quarters. As they walked Warren noticed many different expressions on the faces of those they passed. Some looked at them speculatively, others had a more predatory look and some seemed to fear them. He commented on the looks and Gloria said, "Aye. Many fear a Wizard. Others hope to either steal from you or use you for their own purposes. Of course some want to hire you to enchant or provide magical items. Some hope to harm you and take your possessions. We must be very careful, always, to protect ourselves. Occasionally, other wizards will attempt to kill you and take your magic for themselves"

Warren became even more worried and upset about the situation he found himself in when Gloria told him about the dangers they faced. Until then he thought he'd embarked an a fun adventure much like the games he programmed and played. He laughed to himself at that thought and thought, "Well the walking wasn't a fun adventure either." He was dreaming about fucking the ass off Gloria, however. He figured since she claimed they were married he ought to be able to tap that fine ass any time he could get her pussy bare.

When they entered the Inn the Innkeeper's eyes opened widely and he almost bowed before he said, "Welcome, Lord Wizard. Welcome. How may I help you?"

Before Warren could answer, Gloria stepped forward and said, "My Master requires lodging. We also desire a meal and some of your best ale Innkeeper."

"At once, My Lady." He turned and bellowed toward what was obviously the kitchen while he scurried behind the bar to pull the ale. "Girl, quickly, two meals for the Wizard and his Lady."

The two tired travelers made their way to a table in a corner near the fireplace. After they sat down, Warren's iguana, Toby, climbed out of his robes and curled up on the table. There was an uproar when he was first seen. The first man to see him let out an oath and jumped from his chair, headed for the door. He yelled, "Run, the Wizard has a pet dragon."

Warren rubbed Toby and said loudly, "Calm down. Toby won't hurt anyone if you don't threaten him or me." He just hoped no one figured out Toby wasn't a real dragon and was normally very leery, almost scared, of people...

After they completed their meal the Innkeeper showed them to their room. It could have been better but, for the times, Gloria assured Warren it was as clean and comfortable as they were likely to find.

As soon as the for to the room was closed, Warren undressed and lay on the bed. Gloria looked at him strangely and dithered with her clothes. He said, "Don't worry about it. Come on, get comfortable and climb into bed wife. I spend much of my time at home like this. You'll have to get used to it."

"Yes, Husband," she said as she disrobed. Warren felt his cock spring to hardness as her delectable body was revealed. As soon as she got into bed with him, he reached for her and began kissing her while he touched her breasts, enjoying the soft fullness.

Soon he moved his mouth to a, by now, hard nipple. He spent several minutes playing with her nipples and giving her an occasional kiss while he rubbed and played with her slick pussy. Finally, he couldn't take any more. She was writing on the bed and moaning by the time he moved over her and slipped his slightly above average cock into her pretty little pussy.

They were both so worked up their coupling was fast, hard and VERY satisfying. He collapsed onto her then rolled to the side quickly so he didn't smash her. Warren drifted off to sleep almost immediately. The unaccustomed exercise of the walk to town coupled with the two large flagons of ale had him exhausted. The energetic fuck after they got into the room put the cap on his day and drew the last of his strength from his exhausted body.

The first morning in town Warren and Gloria rose at a, to him, early hour. Gloria was horrified at how late he slept, however. She said, "Finally you awaken Husband. How can you sleep so long? The sun is almost fully risen and yet you lay abed! Come, we must break our fast and begin our search for permanent accommodation. Maybe we can even pick up some coin."

By the time they arrived in the Inn's common room they were no longer serving breakfast. From the smell and looks of the empty bowls still on the table Warren was just as happy to have missed the meal. It smelled and looked unpalatable. Gloria led him out the door and turned back the way they had entered the town. She walked to the market area where stalls were being opened. She purchased some fresh bread, cheese and sausages at three different stalls. They walked down the street to the river and found a comfortable rock to sit on and have their meal.

While they were sitting watching the fog lift from the valley Warren saw a small island in the center of the river. There were tall limestone cliffs that appeared impassable rising from the river. The top of the island was covered with a profusion of bushes and tall trees. He was intrigued by the look and said, "That's a pretty island. I could live somewhere like that."

Gloria looked out at it and said, "How would we get to and from town Husband? Our business and all the shops would be difficult to get to, especially in bad weather."

"I don't know. Let's see if we can find a boat and go look the place over. We can see how hard it is to get to and see if we can find a way to the top. Maybe someone at the ferry can tell us where we can find a boat to rent and give us more information about the island."

They wandered over to the ferry crossing that was about 100 feet above the upstream tip of the island. The Ferry Master said, "Ah, the island. 'Tis truly difficult to get to the top. There are ways but each has its own danger. As ye can see, the bank is no more than six or eight feet on the downstream side and the waters run deep all around it. It is said one of the old Wizards used the island for his home and left many traps. Many have tried to go there. Some have never returned, dead I suppose. Others tried and failed, returning without ever attaining the top. Some made it to the top of the island and found spells that warded them off. Ye, being a Wizard yourself might succeed and safely attain the top but you would know more about that than would I."