Lying in my bed at night, as I drift slowly in and out of slumber, I reflect on my day gone by... a dull lecture, getting caught in the rain, a slow afternoon at work, and that customer who just WOULDN'T leave the bookshop when we were trying to shut. I think he was the tallest man I may have ever seen in the flesh though, and when he bought a copy of 'Jack And The Beanstalk' it was really tricky not to laugh!
I spot my own copy right now across the room... I still keep all the books I owned as a child. I am in half a mind to go and pick it up actually, for old time's sake, but that must have been the moment when I eventually fell asleep...
There is an odd kind of crashing noise and the room shakes, I'm sure it does! Either way I am sitting bolt upright in bed now, my heart in my mouth.
Then there is a silence and after a few minutes of it I manage to work up the courage to get out of my bed and peep out the window into my back yard where the shaking seemed to come from.
I pull back the curtain and let out a gasp in astonishment ... in place of empty washing lines and concrete slabbing, there is some sort of voluminous foliage which shoots up into the sky, right past my second floor apartment window.
In my little white nightie I find myself running out of my flat and down the stairwell into the back garden, to see if this really is for real.
It is! A huge thick stalk like growth with large rubbery leaves is protruding from one missing concrete slab and on looking up into the sky it just grows on wards and upwards until it disappears between the clouds.
I lift up my right foot and find that it quite easily reaches the first leaf of the plant.
Before I realize what I am doing I have pushed my body up against the massive green stalk and taken several more steps onto a few more leaves. I'm not really even thinking, but I keep climbing higher and higher like some crazed mountaineer. I'm sweating and panting and giddy but I can't allow myself to stop, I want to poke my head through those clouds above and see what lies beyond them.
Once in the clouds the air becomes colder, and I can hear something coming from above me... a voice!
I keep on climbing and it grows clearer, the loud and booming voice of what sounds like a very angry man. For the first time I feel a sense of fear come over me. Whoever this man is shouting at really should be quite terrified!
'Get a move on,' he bellows, 'you are the slowest creature in the world. Pathetic! But I'll be dealing with you eventually...'
After what seems like an eternity of climbing, I finally reach the top of the beanstalk. I'm panting heavily and my nightie clings to my sweaty body as my foot steps onto a concrete floor and I pull myself up to standing position. I hear loud heavy breathing behind me, and turn round to find myself face to face with the giant who seems to be standing in a deep pit while I am high up on a ledge, and looking straight into his eyes with nowhere to run.
'You're the slowest climber of them all,' he bellows, thumping his fist down on the ledge I'm standing on, making it shake and me stumble. 'And look at the size of you ... you're the smallest one to climb up here too, what use are you to me?'
I don't know if he's talking to me or more to himself, but I find myself unable to form any words in order to reply to him.
'WHAT'S YOUR NAME? SPEAK TO ME! ...' he roars, his eyes flash at me in an intense rage.
'Lorelei' I finally manage to say, my voice sounding like the squeak of a mouse compared to his. This somehow makes him flash a cruel smile. He reaches out one large index finger towards me (which is around the same length as my own height) and his long sharp finger nail slices through my nightie making it fall to my feet and leaving me stood there naked before him.
'Lorelei, your tits are tiny,' he sneers 'so is your mouth and your cunt and your ass. What fun can you possibly give me?'
I shift from foot to foot, trying to think of a reply that might help save my skin here. But my mind just draws blanks.
'Exactly!' he scoffs 'So I might as well try my little experiment on you and see what the outcome is. I really wouldn't want you as my wife, but you're here and the medicine is ready...'
As the giant turns away to fetch my medicine, whatever it may be, my eyes finally look from side to side, searching for an escape. The platform I'm on trails off into darkness, but I'm not scared, and I decide to bolt towards it in a bid for freedom. I manage to run about 50 yards before I hear thumping and thundering sounds behind me, and then a huge gust of wind makes me lose my footing and crash to the ground landing sat on my ass.
The giant has blown me over with his own breath to stop me running away. He's now raging with anger, and doesn't even bother to speak as he pinches my neck hard between his giant thumb and index finger, forcing my mouth open, and pushes a giant silver spoon towards my lips. As the spoon approaches I notice it holds a dirty white-coloured sludge on it, I try to turn to either side to avoid the 'medicine', but it's impossible. The metal slams against my mouth and the giant tips far far too much of the gloop down my neck. I gag and gag, coughing it back up. I recognize the bitter taste and that makes me gag even more.
The giant lets go of me, laughing. 'Enjoy my seed, Lorelei. That was rather rude of you to waste so much of it there, a good girl would have drank it all up and then wanted more. Now stand up for me.'
With no choice, I rise to my feet. The medicine drips down my hair and neck.
'Nothing's happening yet' the giant muses as he examines me up and down. 'But there's still time,' he adds with a cruel smile.