I'm looking at the woman who just walked into my quarters, and for a moment, I just don't know what to say. She looks familiar in a way that nobody I've ever seen before looks familiar, and I find myself wondering if I've got a long-lost sister or something. Because she looks...she's older than me, maybe five years older, but other than that, I swear I see that face every day in the mirror. Her hair is black like mine is, her eyes the same color brown. Her hair is longer, though, and she wears it differently. She dresses...I could never dress like that. Her skirt is too short, exposing too much light brown skin...if I wore that, I'd lose what little respect I have around here. I also couldn't wear that tight white T-shirt. She's not even wearing a bra.
I open my mouth to ask who she is, how she got in here, but all that comes out is air. It's the weirdest feeling in the world, looking at her. She's smiling, too, like she knows something I don't...no. Like she knows me, but I don't know her. "Hello, Rose," she says. Her voice is familiar, too. "You and I need to talk. About your future."
The way she says 'future' snaps it all into place. Or it would, if that wasn't totally impossible. But as soon as the thought pops into my mind, it's the only explanation that makes sense, and I blurt it out before I can stop myself. "You're...you're me, aren't you?"
"Right." She doesn't express surprise at my having figured it out, but I suppose she wouldn't. She's already had this conversation a few years ago. She knows what I'm going to say, because she already said it. I try not to think too hard about that, it hurts my brain.
"Doctor Richmond's machine? It really works?" I try not to notice that her...my...her nipples get harder when I say Doctor Richmond's name.
"Oh, yes. It works. It will work, five years from now. He doesn't know it, though. Not yet. He's finished the final calculations, and he'll be making his first test tomorrow. But I already know it works, because when I was you, I got a visit from me telling me so. So I snuck in tonight to use it to travel back in time to talk to you."
I stood up and looked at her. Me. Her. Me, five years from now. When do I start dressing like that? I wondered."About what?"
"Your future. You have to know what's going to happen to you--what has happened to me--over those five years. It's vitally important." She gives me a smug look. I feel myself getting irritated, and suddenly all those fights in planning sessions make a lot more sense. You'd think a psychodynamics expert would be better at not having facial expressions that make her look like a royal bitch, but I guess I must not have noticed until now.
"So what's going to happen to me in five years that's so important?"
"You're going to become Doctor Richmond's sex slave." I want to laugh, but I see the way her body language reacts to just saying the name 'Doctor Richmond', and I realize she's totally serious. It's almost worse, because she must know that I believe her. She doesn't follow the statement up with anything to try to back up her case, or persuade me. She just stands there and lets the information sink in.
"So that's why you..." I'm sticking with 'you', now. This woman is not me. "...why you're dressed like that?"
"Yes. Doctor Richmond likes it when I dress like a slut. He finds it sexually arousing, and I know what he finds arousing and pleasing, and I have to do it. I'm compelled. I'm not even wearing any panties, see?" She lifts up her skirt for a moment, and I've never felt more embarrassed to see my own pussy.
"Jesus," I say angrily. "Jesus fucking fuck, that sonovabitch. Goddamn." I see my future self just waiting patiently for my rant to end, but as far as I'm concerned, I'm just getting started. "Oh, I knew that son of a motherfucker was giving me the eye, knew he was thinking about having his own little Asian harem girl, but...fuck him! Fuck....fucky fuck fuck!"
"We do. Or I do, and you will. Every night. I know exactly what to do to get him sexually excited. He was very sexually inexperienced before I came to his quarters, you know. The first few nights, he ejaculated as soon as I touched his penis. But I didn't mind. Pleasing him pleases me. When he comes, I come."
"Stop that!" I shouted. "Stop telling me that shit!" She's still not reacting. I'm not getting anything out of her. She's just waiting. "God-fucking dammit!" I take a deep breath. I'm supposed to be an expert on psychology, I tell myself. I am not about to give in to my temper. "FUCK!"
My future self is still just standing there, still waiting. Maybe she's waiting for me to ask why she's here. "You came back in time. To warn me. You've been..." Son of a fuck, I hate this. "You've been fucking the bastard while he worked on his time machine, you have to know. Can I change the future. Prevent me from becoming you?" I'm rambling now, and intellectually I can realize that panic is starting to set in, but I feel that rat-scrabbling voice in the back of my mind and I can't help but fire off the questions. "When did it happen? How did he do it? I know that everyone is studying crazy-shit science fiction crap at the Institute, but how the fuck did he turn me into...into you?" I'm insulting my own future self, but I don't even care. She doesn't care either. She's still just waiting for me to calm down.
"You walk into his quarters tomorrow morning at 0800 hours, Rose, strip completely naked, kneel down in front of him, and offer him your total servitude for life. He doesn't do anything to you--he's totally shocked by the whole thing. It takes you an hour just to convince him you're not joking, and the better part of a day to accept your offer."
Wait a second. "No," I say. "No. That's bullshit. He's got to do something to me. I wouldn't just do that. He's probably in there right now, working on--" I brush past my future self, and as I do, I feel something hit me hard at the base of the neck. It's not quite enough to knock me out, but I feel everything go all dark and fuzzy as I hit the ground.
My future self grabs me by the ankles. I realize what she was waiting for, now, but it's too late. She knew I was going to turn my back to her. And she was ready.
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