Ryan wasn't sure how much longer he could hold out. Ever since he started testosterone, he became a sex addict obsessed with his growing cock.
His two-incher craved constant stimulation. While his doctor said that this side effect would eventually cool off, for now, he was ravenous in every way.
Now, trapped and alone -- well, perhaps not truly alone, as there were NPCs banging on the door demanding to have their way with him -- his lustful vision had become a nightmare that consumed him.
The spirit was very, very willing, but the body was getting low on stamina. He needed a drink, but there was no real sustenance in this virtual world in which he was stuck.
Regardless, his libido, propped up by a synthetic surge of male hormones, tempted him to accept round after round.
Thus, his struggle with keeping his hand off the deadlock to keep those masked strangers currently banging on the door from flooding in and taking him.
How on earth had he landed in this situation? Ryan had time to reflect while the door stood stalwart between him and the masked figures abound.
He was so happy when he first arrived. Ryan thought it was a stroke of luck, a shiny new invitation to enjoy life in the form of an amazing VR game.
After a failed suicide attempt, he was determined to turn his life around, and at 27 years old, well, he didn't enjoy life, but at least the constant dissociation from seeing a stranger in the mirror was mostly gone.
He got to see himself, after shoving the feelings down and hiding and lying for years and years and years!
Actually, sometimes that made it worse.
At least it was her suffering.
Perhaps it wasn't irony then that he was here, as the only way he could enjoy anything was by escaping reality, still, even now, after he got what he wanted.
This game he'd entered should be a cherry on top, after so much misery and suffering. However, this was a bit too sweet, at it were, a bit too real for what he'd anticipated from a prototype.
He was so horny he wanted to vomit.
That was a strange sensation.
Ryan dug his fingers through his inky hair.
"Why did I ever agree to this!?" he lamented aloud. He let out a sigh. "Suppose I've become more impulsive lately. So much for finally working my life out."
Essentially he'd been thinking with his dick when he signed up for this trial, now that he thought of it, in retrospect.
Well, that wasn't the only reason. The virtual contact was the most he'd had in years; regardless of how hard he tried to make real connections, it didn't matter.
Ryan had not had friends since childhood. He hadn't known anyone who understood his experience in the real world, not before or after transition.
He was an alien, always.
Perhaps his complete inability to integrate into society had made it so that his family ultimately didn't care when he came out. He was already a massive failure, a disappointment.
Still, even so, there was a disconnect between himself and the world that was like the final nail when he did the one thing that gave him a modicum of peace.
It was either an immediate distancing or a slow, gradual loss, but all the same, it made him wonder if perhaps it didn't matter if he lived outside the comfort of his room, or if he slipped away forever.
Ryan was grateful not to be homeless and that his mother allowed him to stay with her in America.
He burned out from the only job he'd ever had, making fries, saving every cent for the sole purpose of transition, a terrifying stagnation taking every corner of his brain and rendering him useless right after that goal was accomplished.
His brain was fried in all that oil, day after day.
So, it culminated in all of this, only for him to fall back down and wind up a degene living in his mother's basement.
Hiding.
Again, hiding.
Kind of like how he was, right now.
Ryan chuckled, forlorn.
Subsequently, the banging on the door grew louder.
He was so fucked.
Well, he was about to be, anyway.
An arm clipped through the wall to his corner right.
Ryan chewed on his lip as he fantasized about Guy's massive cock. Yes, he was thinking about that even now. In that moment, he really just wanted him.
An absolute angel, the only person who gave him pause to think that it was better to stay in his den.
He wanted to lick him up and down and wrap around him, prone bone, to feel every inch of his heat.
Ryan ran a hand up his chest and tweaked his nipple.
To smell him, his skin sweet like vanilla, warm as an oven.
He licked his lips.
Ryan yearned to take that thick girthy length into his hand, his mouth, his cunt, his ass. Rock hard just for him. It would be heaven to feel him erupt under his touch once again, and it ate him up every second he was away from him.
His toes curled in his shoes, and he found himself bouncing from excitement, even in this unfortunate situation.
During his awakening, he found that he very much loved sex rather than finding it repulsive anymore. The very acts that made him shrivel in his skin when he pictured himself as a woman made him feel whole and complete as a man.
Funny that.
Even though life was still objectively terrible, at least that miserable bitch was dead. She left him, underneath it all. With that, an opportunity to, just maybe, be happy for the first time in forever.
Guy wanted to meet. In real life. In reality. Him.
Even after finishing transition, he just thought he'd be a forever-alone hikikomori. The thought of something new was equal parts exciting and scary.
Yes, after so long as a dead-behind-the-eyes NEET, lying down flat, no social interaction beyond a screen, the prospect of meeting someone in person was like getting blasted with a firehose in the middle of a desert!
He prayed he didn't turn into a rabid dog in his presence.
Ryan frowned.
But Guy was probably not going to want to be with him if he saw him for what he was.
There was his conflict, the thing that ultimately walled him off from humanity.
What was he to do?
Adrenaline mixed with arousal until the two were inextricably linked, so strange, how closely fear sits next to pleasure. A spike of arousal, through his core, filling his ribcage and fueling his racing heart.
A masked pig head appeared on the glowing arcade screen to taunt him with a wide smile, only darkness underneath, and hollow eyes mirthfully upturned.
His eyes roamed for a place to hide, though it might not matter. It seemed their eyes were everywhere. That there was nowhere to hide where they wouldn't easily find him, anyway.
Ryan didn't look far before he found a hallway that led to a theatre room.
Oh my.
A whine caught in his throat.
It sure would be humiliating if they caught him here and stripped him onstage in front of a live audience. Seen for the disgusting basement dweller that he was, whose only existence delved down to the bottom of the barrel.
All he did all day was masturbate to several open tabs of porn. It had naturally culminated in this: a fake reality where even sex was just an extension of masturbation.
What a fucking loser he was.
The crosswiring in his brain made him boil with pleasure at the prospect of being completely exposed to be laughed at and mocked, knocked down, crushed in every way.
Yes, he wanted to be destroyed, obliterated, and the most fucked up part of it was that he was totally getting off on it. It was the most shameful part of it, so much so that he would never deign to let anyone do that to him in reality.
But he was in a place blurred just enough between fantasy and reality to make it okay. The fact that most, if not all, of these people weren't real made him feel okay enough when they finally found him.
They were a manifestation of his desires, as it were. Surely they couldn't do something that he didn't truly want them to do, if that logic follows.
At least he tried to hide, at least he came out fighting when they pulled him out by his ears from the barrel he'd been hiding in, and dragged him out from behind the curtains toward center stage.