"It's beginning to look a lot like--ahhhh!"
The snow whirled around the setting sun in the city. On the snowy steps, a woman sang her heart out for her friend, who recorded it for social media. However, a man brustling past her without a care and a scowl on his face knocked her down to the ground.
The woman barely had time to turn and scream at the man before he disappeared into a waiting limousine. The man, with his chiseled chin and fresh-cut face did not notice. The man, with a suit costing more than the woman's rent, did not care. The limousine sped off as if no one else existed.
"Motherfucker!" Screamed the woman. "Merry fucking Christmas!"
The man inside the limo looked out the window, bored.
"I hate this season," he said.
"I'm sorry, sir?" The driver said.
The man responded by closing the separation window between them. He idled with his phone for a moment before calling someone.
"Steven, it's Jay," the man said, adjusting his tie. "You got the number?"
"Jesus, Jay, it's Christmas eve."
"Great. No one is doing important work, then. Getting that number should be easy."
"No, Jay, it means half the staff are off and the other half are leaving early."
"Stev--"
"Because it's Christmas Eve, and I'm sorry if the mighty Jay Roberts can't find enough emotion in his hollowed-out heart to enjoy the festivities, but others can and do. So, your precious numbers will have to wait until after the holiday."
Jay scowled. "Are we talking day after Christmas or--"
"After New Year, Jay."
"There are plenty of days in between!"
"And there is no one that is going to work hard enough in those days. And, even then, the other offices are closed the entire week. So, if you want to pay the employees to come in and do no work--"
"No, no. Fine. Fine!" Jay said, throwing his hands in the air. "I guess we don't need to run a business!"
"We will, Jay. Our infinite growth can wait until the new year. I promise it will still be there."
"You are lucky you are my right-hand man, Steven, or I would have you fired for talking to me like this," Jay said with a sigh. He rubbed his forehead and reached for the small bar fridge. Using his fingers, he cracked open a small bottle of some sort of alcohol.
"Jay, are you drinking already?"
"No, Steven, I'm celebrating. Celebrating the fact I now have a week of no business, no numbers, no nothing."
"If only you had friends and family."
"I'm starting to think I can live without a right hand."
"I get away with talking to you like this because you need it. And you know it. You replace me with one of those young yes-men and they'll be so far up your ass you'll either start to like it and get yourself a p-spot vibrator or miss the days when I would chew you out for failing at being a human being."
Jay gulped the bottle. He gagged. "P-spot?"
"Nevermind," Steven said with a sigh. "Are you going to be okay?"
"What do you mean? We beat last quarter's earnings by--"
"No, I mean you."
"Besides suddenly having a vacation I didn't ask for, yes Steven."
"It's the holidays, man. What are you going to do for the holidays?"
Jay shrugged and emptied the bottle. He let loose a loud burp. "I don't know. Maybe I will go to Vegas. Or, have a few women come up to my place."
"Even some escorts take the holidays off, Jay."
"Not the ones I pay for, Steven. They'll do as I say."
The limo pulled up to a large, sleek, glass building.
"I'm home, Steven. Make sure the crew is back working double-time when all this nonsense is done. I want those numbers at ten o'clock in the morning on January 2nd."
Jay heard a loud sigh. "Yes, my friend. Try to have some fun and joy this holiday season?"
Steven received no response.
"Merry Christmas, Steven."
The doorman opened the door with a smile and a nod.
"What am I supposed to say to that? Bah humbug?"
"Love ya too, pal."
Jay smiled and disconnected the call.
"Hello, Mr. Roberts!" Bellowed the cherry man. "And how are you on this fine Christmas Eve?"
"I just heard it was that today," Jay said, stepping out of the vehicle and buttoning up his jacket. "Miserable time of the year."
"Oh, I think it's full of magic and wonder myself, sir."
"And that's why I have the penthouse suite, and you are working this holiday," Jay said with a shake of his head. "I like you Derek--"
"Danny."
"Danny, sure. Take my advice. Magic? Wonder? You can't exchange that for cash. You can't use that to leverage yourself into a better position. If you stop looking around for all this joy and happiness and see that you can have it for yourself if you work long and hard enough, you'll get there. You have it inside of you," Jay said, pointing at Danny's chest as they walked to the front door. "Stop with all this holiday nonsense. Work hard. Kiss up a little. Get ahead. And then one day you'll have a doorman as you go to your penthouse."
"I'll try to remember that, sir," Danny said in a professional but exasperated tone.
Near the door, a woman walked by. A plain-looking woman with curly brown hair, rosy cheeks, and brilliant green eyes. She carried a large stack of parcels and bags, trying to walk in the snowy winter while unable to see ahead of her. She took her time crossing the door.
"Ma'am, do you need help?" Danny asked, tipping his hat.
The woman stopped to smile.
Jay did not stop.
He plowed through the woman, the stack of parcels and bags tipping over and falling. She, too, fell on her butt with a squeal.
"See? That's the problem, Derek, you have to keep your eyes on what you are doing, not get distracted by...this," Jay said, stopping at the door.
Danny, now openly glaring at Jay, knelt down to help the woman. "Terribly sorry, Ma'am--"
"You have nothing to be sorry for, Derek. I did it. And I'm not sorry," Jay said, looking at the woman. "You need to watch where you are going."
The woman sputtered in anger.
"Hey, don't get mad at me. You stopped in front of a door. On private property. You should be banned from the premises."
Jay snapped his fingers at Danny. "Derek, are you forgetting something? The door, man! The door! That's what you're paid for."
Danny looked at the woman and sighed. She nodded, understanding the man and the situation clearly. Danny got to his feet, dusted his shirt, and opened the door with such force it created a small burst of wind.
"You sir, are uncouth and unpleasant!" The woman yelled as Jay walked inside. Jay paused and turned, bemused. "You need to remember the reason for the season!"
"The reason for the season is for poor people to try and have hope one day they'll live like me," Jay said with a smile.
The woman clenched her fists and bounced on her butt, steaming mad. "You are something else, sir. Something else. I will tell you what. You will be visited by three--"
Jay waved her off, rolling his eyes. "I hate that story."
"You'll hate yourself if you don't see the error of your ways! Just you watch, sir! Just you watch!" The woman screamed as the door closed behind Jay.
Jay shook his head, chuckling to himself as he walked to his elevator.
"Women."
***
A few glasses of champagne later, and a full meal, and Jay collapsed onto his silk sheet bed, clad only in his underwear. His head spinning, he managed to slip under the covers before sleep came for him.
Sometime in the still of the night, he felt something. Something against his leg. He stirred but did not wake up immediately. Then, the feeling grew. Something brushed up against his leg. Something wonderful. It rubbed against his crotch until even Jay could not deny the pleasurable feelings. He opened his eyes.
And saw something underneath his sheets.
