Heisting The Family Jewels

Raven Nightshadow stomped into the Rockport Fish Inn, pushed her way through the crowd of lowlifes, losers, hustlers, thieves, and assassins and took the last seat in a crowded booth in the back corner of the bar. She joined the three women sitting in the small booth who were finishing their notorious bowls of fish chowder and washing it down with mugs of warm, barely potable red ale.

"Well?" Lily Redleaf asked. The tall, thin, blonde elf cocked her head, her green eyes opened wide as she stared into Raven's stern face.

"See for yourself." Raven reached into the front pocket of her worn, tailored jacket, pulled out a folded sheet of paper, and threw it on the table.

Sylvia Goldsmith and Jasmine Storm moved to reach for the folded paper, but Lily was quicker. Her long, thin fingers grabbed the sheet of paper, drew it to her and unfolded it before either Sylvia or Jasmine could extend a hand.

"Denied?" she snarled, her voice registering more disgust than actual surprise.

"So that's it?" Sylvia asked. "We're never getting in?"

"That's not it," Raven replied. "I have a plan."

"Well," Jasmine said. "Let's hear it."

"Not here," Raven responded. "Too many ears."

"When?" Sylvia asked.

"Tonight. I am meeting with my contact this evening, so come up to my room around midnight. I should be back by then."

"It's a date, boss." Sylvia said. "See you tonight."

Raven downed the last of her ale, wiped the foam from her lips, and left. The other three women finished their fish chowder and then one at a time left the table and departed the inn in separate directions.

* * *

Raven surveyed her room. She had lived in the loft above the inn for nearly a year. It was small and stank of fish, but it was cheap and convenient. The inn was located between the docks and warehouse district, so whenever she needed a quick infusion of cash, she could always find a neglected cargo in transit between ship and its final destination.

The rest of the gang found the location useful, also. Jasmine was a card shark and the best pickpocket in Rock Harbor, so the constant foot traffic from the docks to the inn provided her with plenty of opportunities to ply her craft. Likewise, Sylvia was an expert document and fine art forger. Anyone seeking a new start with a new identity was advised to go to the inn and find the buxom redhaired woman with tattoos running up and down both arms.

Jasmine Storm had only arrived in town a year ago. Trained in alchemy, during the day she operated a business selling harmless potions to the lovelorn. But at night assassins, thieves, and other grifters sought her out for her more noxious potions, poisons, and other concoctions. The gang depended upon her craft to help watchmen, armed guards, and homeowners to a timely nap, nausea, or other affliction as the situation required.

Lily was the first to arrive, followed a few minutes later by Sylvia and Jasmine. Lily poured ale from two pitchers that Raven brought up from the inn, filling a mug for each of member of the team.

"Since we're all here on time for once," Raven smirked, "let's get started.

"As you all know, last week we applied for membership in the Thieves Guild. It was our third application in two years. Just like the previous two applications, we were denied without even the courtesy of an interview. Denied, despite pulling six of the top twenty-five heists in Rockport this year. Denied despite an unbroken string of forty-seven consecutive jobs successfully completed without a hitch. Denied despite maintaining a flawless record with local law enforcement comprising zero arrests, zero times named as suspects, zero times being called in for questioning, and zero times being identified by witnesses.

"The first time we applied, we were told we didn't have enough jobs under our belts. So we went to work and pulled off a heist a week for 22 weeks. The second time we were told our jobs weren't big enough, so we pulled off bigger heists with a higher value than any other crew in Rockport. Hell, we're up there with the top crews in all of Corgan's Cock. We're as good as anyone out there.

"All of which leads me to the inescapable conclusion that the only reason our application was not approved is because we're women. If we had cocks, we would be in by now."

"So, what are we going to do about it?" Lily asked. "Unless Jasmine can whip up a potion that will grow us each a cock and a pair of balls, it looks like we're screwed. Jasmine?"

"Actually, I have heard of such a thing," Jasmine answered. "But you wouldn't like the side effects. Bad odor, poor manners, incessant burping and farting and a serious loss of brain cells. But if you want to try it, I'll get to work on it."

"That won't be necessary," Raven responded.

"We could always leave," Lily said. "Go somewhere else. Somewhere that women flourish. All guilds can't be as cockcentric as it is here."

"Or just continue doing what we do now," Jasmine interjected. "We are doing just fine operating outside the Guild. Do we really need them? Fuck 'em. It's their loss."

Raven drained her mug and then slammed it on the table.

"Ladies!" she shouted. "We aren't going anywhere. Guild membership will get us access to better intel, lower fencing fees, safe houses, lower bail, a list of friendly cops, and much more. We are getting into the Guild. I have a plan."

"Of course you do," said Sylvia. "Let's hear it."

"My sources tell me that Prince Lawrence of Thrace will be visiting Rockport next month," Raven said.

"A prince?" asked Lily. "Coming here? Why?"

"He is stopping here for a night of gambling and debauchery on his way to the Seax Isles," Raven answered.

"Time to replenish his stable of concubines?" Jasmine asked. "I've heard he goes through them like a fat kid in a pastry shoppe devouring sweetcakes."

"Precisely. And fortunately for us, his second favorite vice is gambling away large sums of gold."

"So that's the plan?" asked Sylvia. "We're going to heist the casino?"

"No," Raven answered. "Not exactly."

"Then I'm confused," said Lily.

"The prince is a vain son of a bitch. He always travels with his crown jewels. While he's busy gambling, we're going to steal his treasure."

"Go on," said Jasmine.

"We get Lily into the Prince's card game. She uses her special talents to keep him at the table."

"You mean, to fleece him, right?" Lily asked.

"No," Raven answered. "Not this time. The pier guards at the VIP berth change shifts at 2 AM. The card game will start around 10 PM. We need for you to keep the Prince and his entourage busy until well past 2 AM. At least until 2:30. Maybe later."

"What about the rest of us?" Jasmine asked.

"You will be tending bar," Raven answered. "Mixing your special concoctions to keep everyone awake, interested, and feeling good--but not overly aggressive or even slightly suspicious.

"Sylvia, you will create the documents that get our Elven Princess S'Alicia of Mistveil into the game."

"S'Alicia of Mistveil?" asked Lily.

"Yes," Raven replied. "Princess S'Alicia of Mistveil, on her way to Grennskogur to participate in trade negotiations. She stops in Rockport for an evening of illicit entertainment."

"Interesting," said Lily. "And my job is not to relieve the Prince of his gold, but instead to just keep him from leaving the table."

"Right," said Raven. "Him and everyone else in the room.

"Sylvia, you will also manufacture the gold coins that our Elven Princess into the game. She cannot arrive empty-handed."

"Got it," Sylvia answered. "I know where I can score a few pieces of Mistveil currency to use for templates."

"Shortly after the changing of the guards, I will disable them, break into the Prince's ship, and substitute the fake crown jewels for the real ones."

"Fake crown jewels?" Sylvia asked.

"If the crown jewels were merely stolen, their absence would be discovered immediately. Replacing them with identical fakes will buy us time to liquidate them before their absence is even known. They will generate a much higher resale value without the added heat of an active investigation and all-out search."

"One more thing on my to-do list?" Sylvia asked.

"Precisely," Raven answered.

"Do you have models for me to work from?"

"I have schematics and insurance appraisals. The Prince has to buy a new insurance policy every time he removes the jewels from the Treasury. I have a connection in his insurance company."

"I can work with that."

"Give me a list of the materials you will need, and I'll get them for you by the end of the week."

"And what, precisely, will I be fabricating?"

"A crown, scepter, signet ring and dagger."

"Functional, or merely ceremonial ornamentation?

"Fully functional, of course."

"Of course. We couldn't make this any more difficult, could we boss?"

"Sylvia, I told you not to call me 'boss.' We're a partnership."

"Right. Of course. Please continue, bossy lady."

"I'll ignore that. Okay. Once I have swapped the fake jewels for the real ones, I will toss the goods through a window to a skiff waiting outside the Prince's cabin."

"Wait," Jasmine interrupted. "Hold on. Why are you throwing the goods out a window, and do you really expect me to pilot a skiff in the choppy waters around this peninsula? And where do you think I'm going in those waters?"

"I'll answer all your questions, Jasmine.

"First, I'm ditching the goods so I don't have to take a chance of being caught with them here in Rockport.

"Second, no I don't expect you to pilot a skiff in these waters or any other waters for that matter. You will be inside the casino serving drinks to the players in Lily's game.

"And third, the skiff is taking the goods across the bay to Slagport. That's the last place anyone will think to look in the event the jewels are discovered missing."

"Slagport? That requires rowing into the teeth of the current. None of us has that kind of strength--or endurance."

"Wait," Sylvia interrupted. "If none of us can pilot the skiff in those waters and we are all otherwise occupied anyway, then who is piloting the skiff?

"Ladies," Raven announced. "It is time to meet the newest member of our crew. Let me introduce you to Felicia Swift, thief extraordinaire. Felicia, come in here please."

A tall, short-haired Anocot wearing black trousers and a black robe climbed through the open window and entered the room.

"I thought you'd never ask," purred Felicia. "Hello, I am Felicia. I am pleased to meet all of you."

Jasmine and Sylvia gasped. Lily shot a glance at Raven.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Lily asked.

"Absolutely," Raven answered. "Felicia has the physicality to help us complete some jobs we have avoided in the past due to the nature of the challenge. She adds a dimension to our team that we previously lacked. Felicia, tell them about some of the jobs you have pulled off in the past year."

"Certainly. I stole the safe from the Rockport Fisher's Guild. I lifted a statue and some paintings from the top floor of Corgan's tower. What else? Oh yes, I ran down a coach and relieved the passengers of their winnings from a night of gambling. What else? Hold on, there's more."

"It sounds like you are doing pretty well on your own," Lily asked. "Why join us, and why now?

"Good question. Leave it to the Elf to ask the good questions. Quite simply, I am in a similar position as the four of you. The Thieves Guild will not process my application, no matter what I do. So it seems to me the best way for me to advance in my chosen profession is to align myself with similar thinking people who can help me to overcome the obstacles I am unfairly facing in this discriminatory environment."

"Have you thought of becoming a politician? Or community organizer?" Sylvia asked. "The dockworkers could certainly use someone like you representing their guild."

"Bite your tongue. I am an honorable thief. Why would I ever lower myself to operating as a base politician?"

"Well said," Jasmine chimed in. "I vote we let her join us."

"Agreed," Sylvia said.

"Ladies," Raven interrupted. "I never said it was up for a vote. But thank you for your support."

"See?" Sylvia said. "And she says she's not the boss. Who does she think she's fooling?"

* * *

It took Sylvia the better part of a week to put together a complete background with supporting documentation for Princess S'Alicia. Three days later she had secured an invitation for her to participate in a high-stakes card game at the Golden Nugget casino and lounge. Once the fanciest and most glamorous gambling house on the continent, it was a now place where merchants, stevedores, and tradesmen gambled away their rent money while the occasional high rollers attended invitation-only events behind locked doors in the upper level of the once resplendent building.

Jasmine, meanwhile, took a job as a bartender at the Golden Nugget where she learned mixology and practiced alchemy at the same time. Sylvia also took a part-time job as a server at the Golden Nugget. Two weeks before the event, Raven and Felicia rented a small boat and rowed across the bay, investigating every dock, inlet, and sand dune along the rugged coast. Lily did her part as well. She reacclimated herself with the various accents of Northern Elves, brushed up on Mistveil history and politics, and otherwise spent her time acting "princessy"--much to the irritation of the rest of the crew.

Lily checked into the Rockport Diamond Inn the afternoon prior to the card game. The Diamond Inn is located across the road from the Golden Nugget. Prior to the closing of the mines up and down the peninsula, Rockport's millionaire row was one of the richest entertainment and shopping districts on the entire continent. The Diamond Inn was the most luxurious accommodation in town. The penthouse suites were routinely occupied by royalty, wealthy landowners, and the most successful merchants in Leinyere.

But that was all before the precious metals and gems were exhausted and the mines closed. Today, hardly any legitimate persons of means visit Rockport. The few notables who do venture into Rockport usually stay on board their private vessels anchored in the Bay off the coast of Rockport. So when the Princess of Mistveil checked into the Diamond Inn, her arrival was a major event for the hotel staff.

"Princess," the hotel manager exclaimed. "We are honored to serve you."

The manager waived his arms and the lobby suddenly filled with the entire hotel staff. Three maids, a porter, the kitchen staff, the stable boy, the concierge, and the housekeeping staff lined up behind the manager and bowed. They held their positions for several seconds, until Lily finally realized they were waiting for her permission to raise their heads.

"Thank you, all of you, I'm flattered," Lily said in her best Mistveil accent. "I need one of you to take my bags up to my room."

Lily indicated the three bags that Felicia had strapped across her shoulders.

"My servant is exhausted from carrying them from the port."

Felicia shot an angry look at Lily before handing the bags to the hotel porter.

"My servant and I will be in my room."

Lily headed toward the staircase. Felicia dropped the bags and followed behind her. The two reached the top of the stairs and proceeded to the VIP suite. Lily opened the door and found the suite filled with bouquets of flowers, a tray of sweet cakes, a pot of freshly brewed tea, two pitchers of honeyed wine, and a basket of assorted fruits.

"Well, Princess, isn't this fancy?" Felicia asked. "We should do heists like this more often."

"Don't touch anything until after the bags are brought up and the hotel staff is gone. Until then, go to the bathroom and draw me a bath. After all, we've been traveling on a ship for days--at least that's what the hotel staff believes."

"Yes, Your Highness," Felicia giggled.

"Felicia, please stay focused. The hotel staff will be here any second with my bags."

"Of course, Princess," Felicia responded in a tone of mock seriousness. "Command me, your highness."

"Never mind, just stay out of sight."

Moments later there was a knock at the door. The porter entered with her bags, followed by a maid carrying a pile of fresh towels, and the hotel manager with a box of expensive candies from the boutique next door.

"Your Highness," the manager groveled. "Please let us know if there is anything we can do to make your stay more enjoyable."

"Thank you," Lily answered. "This should be all for now."

"And it will be just you and your servant staying here?" The manager asked. "I would have expected a larger retinue."

"The rest of my team is meeting me in Grennskogur. I am making a slight diversion for a weekend of adult entertainment before the trade summit. This is a brief, unofficial visit which is entirely off the books, if you know what I mean."

"I know precisely what you mean, Your Highness. We routinely host VIP guests who prefer to keep their visits a secret for a variety of reasons. You can count on my full discretion."

"Very well. You are dismissed."

The hotel manager and his staff departed. Lily locked the door behind them.

"You can come out now, Felicia. They're gone."

"Forget that. I'm enjoying a hot bath for once."

"Go ahead. I'm going to take a nap until the rest of the team arrives. Raven should be here around nightfall."

* * *

Sylvia and Jasmine arrived an hour after sundown. Raven showed up just before midnight. When she entered the room, the other women had already consumed the complimentary snacks and both bottles of wine.

"Gather round, ladies," Raven said as she removed her coat and tried to pour from an empty bottle of wine. "Been busy, I see."

"There were only two bottles of sweet wine," Lily answered, "and you're four hours late."

"We were just about to go looking for you," Jasmine added.

"That's sweet but remember the first rule: Never deviate from the plan."

"We know," said Sylvia. "So are you going to tell us where you were?"

"I was meeting with my contact," Raven answered. "I have updated information."

"Go on," Lily urged. "Don't keep us waiting."

"First, I confirmed that the card game is on. Prince Lawrence will be there. Not only that, but news that Princess S'Alicia will be attending spiked the interest of some other deep pockets players. A sixth seat was added to the table to make room for another VIP high roller. This game got very rich."

"Who's the new VIP?" Lily asked.

"My contact couldn't say. But he's big."

"Who are the other players?" Jasmine asked. "Anyone we know?"

"Jervin Waterstone is one. His father is in shipping. He's kind of a scalawag, if you know what I mean. He tends to lose more often than he wins, I hear, but he has deep pockets.

"Valentino Ironwood is number two. He used to be a big time brothel owner in the Seax Isles. Sold out most of his interests a few years back and has been living off the proceeds ever since. It's rumored that he's trying to open a place here, but he can't afford the bribes necessary to get a license.

"Who's the last player?" Lily asked. "Besides the mystery high roller."

"My contact didn't have much info on the last player. Someone who calls himself 'Saffron.' Not local. Bought into the game with gold bullion. Definitely someone to watch out for."

"Is it possible that another crew is planning a similar heist? Do we have competition?" Jasmine asked.

"It's a possibility," Raven answered. "But more likely someone else may be planning to hit the game. All those high rollers are a tempting target. Put six of them in one room, and who knows what might happen."

"Agreed," said Lily.

"Unless any of you have more questions, I'm ready to get to bed," Raven said. "We have a long night ahead of us tomorrow, so I suggest you get some sleep."