Font of Fertility

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All Characters in sexual situations are 18 years or older.

This story is a continuation of the Font of Fertility series. I suggest reading Chapter 1 if you have not already. This chapter includes a quick date, referenced MFF, brief MF, and a whole lotta magic.

Jeremiah has some explaining to do, decisions to make, and moves his girls into the penthouse only to be met with a surprise.

Reminder: This story started in 2015, and is currently in 2016 in the modern world. Some pop culture references may seem wonky in this chapter without that knowledge.

Returning Dramatis Personae

- Jeremiah 'Jerry' Grant - Seat of Fertility, aka. Powerful Sex Shaman

- Lauren Baxley - Public girlfriend, Jerry's Prime in the magic world, closest friend and confidant

- Jay - Jerry's best guy friend from high school

- Benji - Jerry's guy friend from high school, the one with the attitude

- Aidra - Petite goth girl from Jerry and Lauren's school, Fuck buddy, Witch

- Lindsey Baxley - Girlfriend/Concubine, Lauren's step-sister via marriage, girl-genius

- Stacey Wilde - Girlfriend/Concubine, godchild of Jerry's parents, athletic

- Esmerelda - Seat of Death, aka. Powerful Death Wizard, second-youngest Seat, weirdo

Referenced Characters

- Jerry's Parents - 'Mom' and 'Dad,' took in their goddaughter Stacey when her parents died in an accident

- Annalise Stoker - Concubine/Girlfriend, Fire Mage

- Angela 'Angie' Dawkins - Girlfriend/Concubine, Lindsey's friend from back in high school

- Jordan - Redheaded writer friend, interested in Jerry and his Harem

- Xi Zuang - Seat of Life, aka. Powerful Experience Wizard

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I had, for the most part, been trying to keep my old life.

Sure, there had been some major changes since I got my magic and became a Seat of Fertility. Lauren, Lindsey and Stacey and my relationships with them were pretty big in that regard. But nothing had changed with my parents. Nothing had changed with school. And the thing with Benji had definitely been a big hiccup in our friend group, and I'd inadvertently empowered that with magic, but it hadn't completely torn things apart.

Even Aidra becoming my fuckbuddy didn't feel like a dramatic change. We'd already been friendly, if not

great friends

, and adding in sex felt like it was only going to be a bonus between us and wouldn't necessarily change how we were at school.

"Oh, shit," Lauren sighed from behind us as she came to the door and saw Jay and Benji standing halfway up the driveway.

"Do you want me to stay and help with... this, or go?" Aidra asked me.

"We've got this," I said with a sigh, looking down at the short goth girl. "See you Monday."

"See you," she said and started walking down the driveway. "Ah," she said, holding up a hand to the guys when she approached them and they looked like they were going to ask her something. "Talk to them."

Watching Aidra walk to her car in her kilt and fishnet stockings made me want to grab that little ass of hers again, but I knew that could happen whenever we wanted now. At the moment there was a much bigger problem.

"What the fuck was that?" Jay asked, coming up the driveway.

"Calm down, Jay," Lauren said, coming to stand next to me on the porch.

"Calm down?!" Jay said. "What the hell, guys? Lauren, do you even know what he was doing out here with Aidra?"

"Kissing her goodbye, I assume," Lauren said.

Jay sputtered a little, looking like he'd lost his sense of balance in the world.

"So she's one of the girls you're... um...?" Benji asked.

I frowned and sighed out through my nose, trying not to turn it into a groan or growl. "It's not really your business, guys."

"Yeah, maybe not, but it is now that it's happening right in front of us," Jay said. "I mean, what the fuck?"

"How about you guys come in, instead of having this conversation outside?" Lauren suggested.

We all piled inside and I called upstairs that Jay and Benji were there - the last thing this situation needed was Lindsey or Stacey coming down only partially dressed or saying something sexual without realising who could hear. I led the guys down to the basement, our usual hangout space at my house, and we all sat down.

"OK, for real," Jay said. "Are you guys swingers or something?"

"No," Lauren said. "At least, not like how you might be thinking."

"Are you... like are you guys polyamorous?" Benji asked.

"Sort of," I said.

"What the fuck?" Jay asked. "How? Why? You guys

just

started dating."

"What we do in the bedroom doesn't have anything to do with you guys," Lauren said.

"Well, it will if you're banging a bunch of people at school," Jay said. "Who else are you guys fooling around with, so I know what rumours might be true when they start up?"

"No, I think it's more important we find out why," Benji said to Jay, and turned to Lauren and I. "What the fuck is going on? How is this happening?"

"Wait, is this why I barely saw you at your own New Year's party?" Jay asked.

"Fuck," I groaned and shook my head, glancing at Lauren.

My girlfriend was frowning, her brow furrowed just a little, as our eyes met. Neither of us had an answer for this. She turned to the guys. "I'm bi, and so I opened up our relationship but just to girls. Who we fool around with is about who we're attracted to, OK?"

"You're officially bi?" Jay asked. He must have assumed, considering Lauren had already told him we'd had a threesome with another girl, but I guessed 'official' was important in his mind.

"But

how?

" Benji asked. "I mean, no offence Jerry, but you're not exactly high on the popular scale at school. How are you guys suddenly having a bunch of threesomes and shit?"

"We ask, or offer," Lauren said. "And Jerry is way more attractive than you guys give him credit for." Both of them looked at me dubiously. "Plus there was the accidental advertising of when we got caught fucking in the girls' locker room at school."

That had both of the guys shaking their heads. Maybe they'd forgotten about that little incident.

"That's still- how many?" Jay asked. "Like, how many people have you two hooked up with?"

"That's kind of rude to ask," I said.

"I don't care!" Jay burst. "Seriously. Everything is changing, and I want to know why. None of this makes sense. This whole winter break you guys have been MIA. I figured you were just spending a lot of time together, but even then I figured you weren't just having sex all the time. Now I find out you were, just with other people too, but I mean... what the fuck?"

"It's suspicious," Benji said. He clearly wanted to say more, but he was still on his back foot since his apology to us.

"Why have you been hiding shit and lying to us? Are you guys in a sex cult or something?" Jay asked.

"What?" I asked. "No. Is that a shot at Aidra?"

"It's a fair question," Jay said levelly. "No one our age hooks up like this. It's kind of ridiculous, so something is going on."

"Nothing is going on," Lauren sighed in exasperation.

"You're lying!" Jay said, throwing his hands up in the air. "I can fucking tell, Lauren. Jerry is a little harder to read, but I always know when you're lying or bluffing because you have a tell. It's why I can always catch you out during board games."

"I have a tell?" Lauren asked.

"Yes, you do," Jay said. "And I'm not telling you what it is, but I know you're lying. So if you guys don't respect us enough to tell us what's going on, I think we should go." He looked at Benji, who nodded, then back at us. "You can let me know when you decide to trust us enough to tell us what's going on."

That one hit me in the heart. It wasn't that I didn't trust them, especially Jay. I just didn't want them getting wrapped up in all of the shit that was going on. I looked at Lauren as Jay and Benji stood up. I knew she was going through almost as much turmoil as I was with this.

Options. I could make them forget what they just saw, and the whole conversation. All we had to do was get them outside again, and they could come in and hang out like they were apparently planning to anyway. That would be messing with their minds though, and even though we'd decided that messing with memories was on the table, I still wanted to limit that to an 'Emergency Only' decision. The more I thought about it, it just felt wrong to do that to anyone, especially someone I thought of as a friend or family.

I could let them go and use the time to build a better lie. Find some way to keep them in the dark. It was kind of awful, but I didn't really mind doing that to Benji at the moment. Jay, however, definitely didn't deserve that.

It was improbable, but I could get Stacey and Lindsey down into the basement to back up our current story. I wasn't sure how far that could fly, though, and it would open up questions of propriety when it came out that we were all sleeping together, whether or not we were 'actually related.' If word got out at school, it might get too big too fast for me to realistically contain.

Then there was the truth.

Looking into Lauren's eyes, I knew I didn't need to open a telepathic connection to understand what she was telling me.

"Alright," I said. "OK. We'll tell you."

"Good," Jay said. "Then let's hear it." He was already standing up, ready to walk to the stairs and leave, and Benji had joined him.

"Just follow me," I said. I glanced at Lauren and took her hand, then went to one of the storage closet doors. "Here, take my hand," I said to Jay.

"Why?" he asked, looking confused.

"Just do it, Jay," Lauren sighed.

"Benji, grab onto the back of my shirt," I said.

Jay took my hand, and Benji grabbed the back of my shirt.

"What the fuck are we doing?" Benji asked.

"Just follow me," I said, opening the door and stepping from my basement and into the Sanctum through the teleportal door.

"What the

fuck!?

" Jay burst.

"Where the hell are we?" Benji asked, looking around the cavernous main space with its empty plinths that used to hold artefacts and the arching structure of the Amplifier looming in the middle.

"So, there

is

something I've been hiding from you guys," I said. "It's still new and only really happened right before the holidays started, and I've been trying to grapple with it a bit and things have been changing rapidly. It turns out I'm kind of a wizard, and I have the ability to cast spells, and I'm part of a line of very powerful wizards. This is the sanctum that was handed down to me by the previous guy who had my position."

Benji was looking at me with big, confused eyes while Jay was giving me a deadpan look and blinked rapidly.

"Technically his title is Shaman," Lauren said.

"You're a fucking wizard," Jay said.

"You're a

fucking wizard!?

" Benji burst out a little.

Lauren snorted and then started laughing.

"What is so funny?" Jay asked.

"You guys are more right than you know," she chuckled.

I sighed. "Look, magic is complicated. I'm what's called a Seat of Fertility, and I can do basically any sort of magic that I can think up but I get my power from... having sexual relations. There are other Seats that get their power from life experiences, and from death. But most of the people in the world who can do magic are a lot more limited in

what

they can do, but can do it a lot more easily without needing to charge up their batteries."

"So all the sex you're having... is to do magic?" Jay asked incredulously.

"Well, I mean, the sex is also really good," Lauren smirked.

"Does everyone you have sex with

know?

" Benji asked.

"No, though... I mean, sort of mostly," I said.

"How many people have you told before us?" Jay asked, looking hurt.

"It's not about telling them before you, it's about trying to keep the circle as small as possible," I said. "Look, I've already been attacked once, and the other Seats are like

thousands

of years old with a shitload more power than me, and I'm still trying to figure out what this whole magical world

is

. The more people who know, the more likely they'll be targeted to try and get to me."

"That's some bullshit," Benji said. "Life isn't a comic book, if there are real people who want to hurt you through us, what's to stop them from doing that whether we know what's going on or not?"

"Nothing specifically," I sighed. "But the magic world tries not to show itself to the non-magic world. It's a whole Diagon Alley situation."

"Great," Jay said. "Just fucking great. So what now, then? Are we just going to be targets or something?"

"Jerry maybe wasn't clear enough about who he is," Lauren said. "He's one of the nine head wizards in the entire world.

Way

more powerful than anyone else, as long as he has the power built up. He's Saruman, or Superman. Anyone who goes after him in any way is asking for a nuke shoved up his ass. The one guy who already did so far was crazy and Jerry severed his ability to do magic, which is like the magic-world equivalent of cutting off the guy's balls and making him eat them."

"Well, fuck," Benji said. "Isn't that great? We only need to worry about

crazy

people with magic."

"Yeah, OK, that's fair," I said. "But still, you guys demanded to know. And I've been trying to figure out who I should and shouldn't tell, it's not like I decided

not

to tell you, I just wasn't sure whether it was the right choice or not."

"Come on," Lauren said. "Let me show you guys around the Sanctum, and you can ask me questions without Jerry listening in. OK?"

She took them over to the library first, while I sat on the edge of the Amplifier stage and tried to just breathe and not freak out. The whole situation was fucked. Lauren and the guys were in there for a while, but other than an initial

'Holy shit!'

when they first walked in and saw the view over the lake of lava, I couldn't hear them. I could have listened in, but I trusted Lauren to handle the two of them. Eventually, they came out of the library and the guys only took little glances at me before she led them into the bedroom to show off the river and the hot pool. They were in there a much shorter amount of time before they returned.

"Who knows?" Jay asked. "Lauren says you need to have a harem to properly build your magic, but also you need to fuck new people too. Because it's

totally fucking normal

in whatever this magical culture is for harems to be a thing, right? Totally normal!"

"It's not

totally normal

," I said. "But it's expected of people in my situation. The other two Seats of Fertility are like... sex addicts on steroids. I'm trying my fucking best to

not

be that. Apparently by a month in, most of the other Fertility seats had fucked their way through dozens, if not hundreds, of people and threw most of them aside. I don't

want

to be that kind of person."

"Have you fucked my Mom?" Benji asked. "Our Moms?"

"No," I said, giving him a shocked look.

"Did you have sex with Clarissa?" Jay asked. "You can affect people's minds. Did you screw her and make her forget, or not care, or just not tell me?"

"Jesus fuck, Jay," I said. "Do you think I'm a fucking rapist?"

"No," he said, his shoulders slumping. "But this is all fucked, and right now I don't know

what

I believe."

"I didn't have sex with Clarissa," I assured him.

"Then who is in your harem?" Benji asked.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. They would find out, or need to know, eventually. Better to get it out now. "Lindsey was the second person to join after Lauren."

"Jesus," Jay said, looking at Lauren.

"It was my idea," Lauren said. "We aren't blood-related, I love her to bits, and she needed Jerry. I'm not telling you any more than that, and don't ask her unless she offers. It's her story."

"Who else?" Jay asked.

"Third was Stacey," I admitted.

Both guys gave me '

what the fuck?

' looks, then made considering looks, and then Jay shrugged and shook his head. He couldn't blame me. We weren't even step-siblings. And, based on the light teasing that had happened over the years, both of them thought she was hot.

"Fourth was a woman named Annalise," I said. "She's a Fire mage who came to me needing help, and we kind of got involved."

"Another complicated story for another time," Lauren said.

"Then fifth was Angela. She was in Lindsey's year at school."

"No fucking way," Benji said. "Angela Dawkins? I still- Never mind."

I didn't want to know what Benji 'still' did to his memory of my girlfriend.

"And you guys already know I met up with Jordan a couple of times this week. Well, she sort of figured out what was going on and

asked

to join, and I really like her so I said yes," I said.

"Wait, she figured out you were all magical and shit in like

two days?

" Jay asked.

"No, she figured it out about the harem situation," I said. "Then I told her about the magic to make sure she understood what she was getting into."

"Jesus," Jay sighed. "And now Aidra? Is that all?"

"Aidra was just a hook-up," I said. "She's a friend."

"For now," Lauren said with a smirk.

"It's complicated," I clarified, as much for her as for the guys.

"Fuck me," Benji said, shaking his hand.

"No thanks," I said, trying to joke. "I'm not into dudes."

He made a face. "Not what I mean, but good to know."

"Do you guys want to see outside the Sanctum?" I offered.

We made the walk up the spiral stairs to the top in silence, I opened the main Vault door and we climbed the ladder and popped up. It was still pretty warm, but it was damp and I could tell it had rained recently. "Welcome to Hawaii," I said as I offered them hands up out of the old hidden bunker shaft.

"What the fuuuck," Jay said, looking around. It may not have been the

best

possible view, but it was still pretty great from the side of a volcano. The ocean was a deep blue-grey under the overcast sky, and the tropical foliage spreading out in all directions made it pretty evident we weren't anywhere near our suburban home. A city, way off in the distance, was like a landmark that we hadn't travelled to some other world or time altogether.

"This is insane," Benji exhaled heavily, looking around. "What's the distance, like 4,000 miles or something? You brought us here in an instant?"

"Well, with the way the spell works I need a door," I said. "Getting here the first time was a lot more of a pain."

"Jerry almost died the first time," Lauren said.

"To be fair,

that

wasn't exactly connected to getting here," I said.

"Yeah, I guess," she shrugged. "But still, just to be clear you guys - Jerry has almost died doing magic stuff. This isn't some game."

"Have you killed anyone?" Jay asked.

"No," I said. "And I'm hoping I won't have to, but... it could happen."

Jay looked troubled, and Benji had his lips pursed as he kept looking around like he was trying to do the math on something.

"Let's go back," Jay said after taking one more look up at the volcano.

We all headed back down into the Sanctum and I shut the doors behind us, then I had them hold onto me like last time and we stepped out of the Sanctum and into my basement again.

"Look," I said. "I get it, it's a lot."

"Yeah," Jay said. "It is. You're some grand wizard, you've been hiding it from us even if it might be for a good reason, and apparently, you get your powers from fucking. You realize this is fucking insane, right?"

"Everyone always thinks it's insane, or crazy," Lauren sighed as she shook her head. "No one is ever like, 'OMG Jerry, that's so cool!'"

"Actually, Jordan took it really well," I said. "She had a list of ideas of what might have been going on. Wizard was third on her list after Vampire and Incubus."