Please do not read if under 18 years of age or offended by sexually explicit stories and situations.
(c) 2002 Couture
***********
Mark was very happy driving along in his blue 99' Buick Regal. He was so happy that he was attempting to sing along with Eminem, and not just the chorus either. He was doing a wonderful job of butchering the song, but he didn't care. It was a few days until his one-year anniversary as a Kirby salesman and he only needed one more sale to make a hundred and the large bonus it entailed. One more sale - he could do that in his sleep.
"I know that you got a job Ms. Shady, but your husblah- blah-bla-blah-bla-blah," Mark sang, finally giving up on the verse and resorted to making up his own song.
"I'm gonna sell you a vacuum Ms. Shady. Cuz I na-na-na- need the money. So let me see one hundred vacuums equals a bonus. And I really really needz a bonus." Mark laughed, but then something caught his eye. He stopped the car, looked back in the rear view mirror to make sure no cars were coming, then backed up to the intersection.
"Desmonda drive." He looked on the map and noticed there wasn't a Desmonda drive listed. Jackpot. This was Mark's style. As a traveling salesman, he learned early on, it paid to take the less traveled path. Let the other salesmen compete with one another on Main Street, while he went to homes that had never seen a traveling salesman, much less learned how to slam the door in one's face.
The only thing was Desmonda drive looked like a miss, instead of a hit. There didn't appear to be any houses on this lone street. He drove to the end of the street to turn around, and spotted a small white house to the right of the cul de sac. It was a well kept house with burgundy shutters; the yard could have used a good mowing.
"La la la la. La la la la. La la la la la la la la lah." Mark sang the only part of the song he could do a decent job on, while he pulled the Kirby model 9000 out of the trunk along with the trunk of accessories for the vacuum. The trunk also contained dirt, marbles, and even a bowling ball used to demonstrate the machine.
This was one of the reasons most of the Kirby salesmen were men, and young men at that. The vacuum weighed about forty pounds and the assorted odds and ends added up to another thirty pounds or so. Luckily the trunk and case had handles and wheels.
Mark wheeled the two cases to the front door. He knocked. There was no answer, but the door opened a few inches. Mark opened it a little more, knocked again, and said, "Hello? Hello, is anybody home?"
There wasn't an answer, but what Mark saw there in the living room and dining room, made his jaw drop. They had a full set of Encyclopedia Britannica and a deluxe Singer sewing machine. As long as they didn't already have a Kirby, Mark figured he was only a few minutes away from his bonus.
It made him a little less cautious. He took a step in and knocked on the inside of the door. "Is anybody home? Boy, have I got something to show you."