Nothing To Live For Ch 02

Please note: I am in the process of finding an editor. I have dyslexia so that is the reason for errors so keep that in mind with giving me constructive criticism. I want constructive criticism but not on my editing skills as I am seeking help for that, but more on my plots and character building, etc.

Wlo

Chapter 2

'Acceptance'

I woke up the next morning, feeling rested and still having that feeling of ecstasy all over my body. I laid there thinking of the night I spent with Chan. I also remembered that there are many unanswered questions. I was not sure if I should be afraid of the answers or not. Chan was still fast a sleep at my side, and his arm was firmly around my waist, with a grip that said he was not going to let go. It was a comforting feeling but also one that scared me half to death. I soon found my self with the anxiety of what I really has gotten my self into.

Panic started raging through my body. I knew this feeling as I have been cursed with anxiety attacks all through my adult life. My doctor told me that I have what is called generalize anxiety disorder. Giving it a name didn't make it easier to deal with. I started panicking even more when I realized that I didn't even have my medication to take when this happened. I was sure my med's were still at the cabin. "shit" I thought to my self. Just breath Lilly just breath. I couldn't breath and it wasn't helping that Chan's arm was wrapped around my waist so tightly.

I tried to manually move Chan from my body but his strength was more then I estimated. I needed some space some room to breath, I needed to get him off before I passed out. I think Chan realized there was something wrong because he shot up in bed and was at my side in seconds. I was brought up to his lap and I was shaking, sweating, and hyperventilating all in one. I am not sure if he knew what was happening to me, but he didn't hold on tight he gave me my room but also kept me on his lap as to let me know I was safe. I closed my eyes knowing I didn't have any medication on me to bring me down from this. I started to try to will my self to take deep breaths in and out till I stopped hyperventilating. I was still shaking and sweating but at least I could finally breath normally.

Chan could feel and hear my breathing going back to normal. He started to stroke my hair and my face to calm me down. Taking the other hand and pressing me firmly but gently into his chest to sooth me. I could hear his heart beat. It was a steady beat, my anxiety didn't up set him at all, he was very calm which made me even calmer. A slight moan exited my mouth and I looked up to him not saying anything, but I can tell in his eyes that he knew I was thanking him in my mind. It actually almost felt that he was in my mind. I have never came down from an anxiety attack with out my medication. It was truly an amazing feeling.

We didn't say anything to each other he just reached down and kissed me gently yet firmly. He got up taking me with him in his arms. He was heading to the bathroom with me. Chan sat me down on the counter and as he did I looked around this marvelous bathroom. I could not believe what I seen. I swear the bathroom was as big as the bedroom. It was huge!!!!! Chan walked over to the sunk in bathtub. It was huge and beautiful. The faucet and knobs were chrome which went very elegantly with the marble sung in tub. My eyes roamed around the room. The counter I was sitting on went the length of the room it was a double sing and in the middle, that I was sitting on was a type of vanity. A place where a girl could put on her make up, do her hair. There was nothing occupying the space no chair for the vanity. Nothing on the counters. The sink fixtures matched the ones in the sunk in tub. I then glanced over to the other side of the room to see a huge I mean huge shower. This shower was amazing, I could get lost in there. First off it was made of glass all the way around. There were several shower heads on the ceiling of the shower and several jets all around to give your body a massage. I also seen some kind of panel, I believe it was to manipulate the shower heads and jet to get the desired setting you wanted. I worked my eyes over to the right and I seen a huge linen closet and a dressing area fit for a king. I could live in here. My eyes focused on the shower again in amazement. I had to try out that bad boy.

It was almost if Chan knew what I was thinking. He lifted his eyes up to mine and said to me, "Later, right now you need a relaxing bath, after we will talk." Chan finished by putting in some bath bubbles and some bath salts. He then came over to me lifted me from the vanity and placed me in the tube. This actually felt so nice, I was on cloud nine and I didn't want to come down. He started to wash my hair, he felt light as a feather in my hair never tugging one strand to cause any pain. He then rinsed my hair and took a wash cloths and started to wash my back. Firmly yet gently scrubbing my skin, massaging it as he went along working down my back. I started to moan it felt so good. I have never been treated this way before, and my husband was very good to me, just this was treatment fit for a queen.

Chan then had a grin on his face in stead of using the washcloth he used his hands to wash and bath the front of me. He started at my neck running water down the front and back taking his big hands making sure that he touched every part of my necks. He then took both hands and ran then down my shoulders making his way to my breasts, but making sure that he massaged as he went. I did feel so wonderful. He then made it to my breasts spending a little more time there. cupping and circling my breasts with his hands, trying to not arouse me more then I was. He still managed to make my nipples hard as a rock with out pinching or twisting them. My nipples puckered up and stood strait, this made him even grin even more and even groan him self. He then worked his way down my belly stopping at my belly button, circling it with his finger as to tease it, as if it were my pussy. He didn't go down to my pussy, he passed it and went down my legs to my feet massaging my feet. My pussy ached for him and he knew it, but he was going to torcher me and not touch me there, I think it was also torturing him as well. Chan then got up to the lien closet and brought out a huge soft white towel. He stood me up and wrapped me up and brought me back into the bedroom.

Chan sat me down on the bed and then took the towel off and started to dry me off. He then went over to one of the closets and brought out a beautiful spring dress. It was yellow with little white flowers all over it. The material was sheer, but not so much as you could see strait through it. He stood me up and draped it over me. While my breast where large they were still firm and did not need a bra. Something I was proud of with my beautiful breasts. All this time he didn't say a word to me. I wondered where he got the dress from. Did this dress belong to someone else? I had to break the silence this was to much. I couldn't take it any longer. While I love to be pampered I still needed some answers, and I still could not believe I was putting my whole self out there, trusting him even though I didn't even know him.

"Chan" I said to him.

He looked up at me and said "I guess its time we should talk?"

I smiled back at him "Yes, it would be nice, I have a lot of questions that need to be answered"

"Where would you like to start Lilly?"

I paused, not sure what answer I wanted first. "Well you already answered one question last night, that you were the one that saved me?"

He looked up at me with those beautiful green eyes and said "yes"

"Where you at my families funeral?"

"Yes, and Lilly you were not there?"

Tears started to gather in my eyes, part from the shame part from the pain of my loss.

"I don't know how to explain...I can't explain why I was not there"

"I understand Lilly, I don't want to bring up painful memories"

"I went to the hospital to try to find out who saved me, they didn't have any records, how did you find me?"

Chan let out a low grunt, he looked at me for a while, trying to gather his words.

"The Clerk knew....she well was protecting me. She called me to inform me you were in town and looking for me"

all I could say was "oh" what did he mean by protecting him? What was there to protect?

"The men at the restaurant, how did you know they followed me?"

He grunted again and cleared his throat. "Well, that is because I was following you as well"

"oh, how much did you see, where did you follow me"

"from the time you stepped out of the restaurant" he said to me

So that meant he seen me at the site of the accident. I started to feel my face get red, I was so embarrassed that he seen me reliving that day.

Chan looked up at me and said "don't feel embarrassed or ashamed, I understand why you were there."

My eyes shot back up at him, how the heck is he doing that, how can he be feeling or reading my mind. I started to get a little frightened.

"oh Lilly, don't be frightened I would never hurt you."

I gasped again, what the heck. "Chan, that is my next question, how the heck are you doing that, how are you reading my mind?"

Again there was a long pause from him his breathing seemed to get a little deeper. "Lilly there is a lot to tell you, but you are my mate, that is why I can feel what you feel and hear what you are thinking."

I stood strait up, this alarmed me. "MATE!" I yelled out. "What the hell is that suppose to mean?"

Chan got up and took me in his arms "Come Lilly, Lets go sit down, its time I go into some detail."

Chan brought me over to the sitting area. He began to tell his story. "Last night Lilly during our love making you may have noticed or felt some strange things." I just nodded in agreement and just let him speak. I didn't want to interrupt him during this time. I wanted to be able to take it all in. Chan went on "Lilly I don't know any other way to say it. I am a lycanthrope, a wolf, a werewolf." I sat there, still, not saying a word so he went on. "I am in a pack, I am the Alpha male in my pack. I was born a werewolf and was born into the position of Alpha male for my pack. I protect them, and are there guardians. I care for all the needs of the pack. This is my Den that we are in. We are on my estate, I own most of the town and restaurants. Even the hospital that is why they were protective of not giving any information out about me. I am not sure or if you have heard anything of werewolf's, but we are not mindless beasts controlled by rage and lust." Chan grinned up at me and said "Well maybe a little lust" he then went on explaining. "Our human traits roll over to our feral traits. We take three forms Human, the next form we can still be seen as part human part wolf and the last stage would be the feral stage. A full wolf form in every aspect, still having our human traits. The knot that you felt when we were making love is part of the wolf, it is part of the mating process, you didn't look back but right before, I well shot my seed into you I shifted into my wolf form. I am sure you felt or noticed something but didn't say. Lilly I took you as my Mate."

I am not sure how long I sat there with out saying a word. But Chan started to I can tell get irritated that I was not responding to what he just told me. What was I going to say.

I looked up at him and said "You could have asked me if I wanted to be your mate."

Chan grinned at her comment "You are more worried that I didn't ask you to be my mate, then me telling you I am an big ugly wolf?"

I took a deep breath in "Well I was wondering what the wolf was about in my dreams."

He cocked his head to one side just as he did in the restaurant. "Tell me about these dreams of yours"

I grunted as the first part of the dream was just pain. "Well I would first live out my nightmare from the accident, but at the end I would just see this big midnight black wolf in my dreams. He was huge, and his eyes were bright green, for some reason I would wake up with lust and it felt like the wolf was calling for me. I know it sounds strange."

Chan looked up at Lilly with a smile. "Not so strange"

At that moment he shifted into his feral form. There stood in front of me the wolf that was in my dreams all those months. I could not believe my eyes. He was more beautiful in person then in my dreams. Could this be true, have I been dreaming about Chan the whole time, was he truly calling out to me? His mate? Chan sat down on his back legs and cocked his head to the side like he did before in human form. I stood up and got on my knees right in front of his beautiful face. I started running my hands through his soft fur. I even scratched behind his ear which he seemed to like a lot, as I seen his cock harden. He growled in a soft way and started to lick my face. I just could not believe my eyes at the beautiful sight.

Chan shifted back into his human form. I was still at my knees and his cock was so alive and so hard. I couldn't help my self. I brought his cock into my mouth. I slowly teased his head with my tongue. Working it slowly twisting my tongue over the top of his cocks head. I slowly ran my tongue to his balls. Sucking in each one slowly as I stroked his cock from base to head. I could hear him moaning softly. I think ran my tongue back up the base to the tip of his cock. I slowly brought him into my mouth. He is so huge, but I managed to work him all the way back to my throat working against my gag reflexes. I wanted to make sure I took all 10 inches in my mouth. "oh god Lilly" he moaned. I looked up and smiled. I started sucking even faster. I wanted all his cum in my mouth and I wanted every last drop of it. I demanding he give me every last drop. I worked his cock over with my mouth and tongue, making sure every part was licked and sucked. I knew he was close to cumming, he took my head and grabbed a handful of hair and started trusting me down on his cock. I knew he was about to cum, so I started sucking harder and massaging his balls. He started spurting cum to the back of my throat, I made sure to swallow each time, making sure not to miss a drop of his cum. I stood up and he took me in his arms. We kissed passionately for the longest time, making love to each others mouth with our tongues. I let him explore every part of my mouth giving my self to him. He pulled away from me. I then asked. "When do I get to meet the pack?" He smiled at this knowing that I excepted him for who he is and most importantly excepted that he is my mate.

To be continued...