Foxbutt so far:
Part 1
,
Part 2
,
Part 3
,
Part 4
This is my first ever furry story, so please let me know what you think!
***
"Hey man," says Lily, leaning around Thomas' wallet, "settle an argument for us."
The pizza guy looks wary. "Okay?"
"So, man to man -" Lily holds up Thomas' razor. "Does this guy need a new razor, or what?"
The pizza guy's nose wrinkles as he grins. "Yeah, man, that's
nasty.
"
"Told ya," says Lily, elbowing Thomas gently in the side as he accepts the pizza box.
After Thomas has thanked the guy, listened to a brief and highly enthusiastic recommendation for an online-only razor brand, promised to check out the site, thanked the guy again, wished him a good night and closed the door, Thomas turns to Lily with an exasperated expression and says "What if
we,
" flipping a pointing finger between himself and Lily, "are the ones
vividly hallucinating a clean razor?
What then?"
"No," says Lily, shaking her head.
"What?"
"No, I said," says Lily, taking the pizza from Thomas and heading towards the couch. "If we start down that road, Tom, we're both gonna go nuts. Magic is real and you're a fox and I'm part of this big magic thing, that's all there is to it. If we start questioning our own eyes, then we're gonna open ourselves up to some really headfucky stuff." She sits down, and opens the box. "I mean, it's already headfucky, but it's gonna be the
sad
kind of headfucky, not the wonderful kind."
Thomas is quiet for a moment. "Yeah, I get your point. Like, what if I'm in a coma and this is all some kind of weird dream?"
"Then you'd still be hungry for pizza," says Lily. "Sit." Thomas does so.
The pizza is half ham and pineapple, and half ham and every other meat. Lily reaches for the half with fruit in it.
They take a bite, in thoughtful quiet.
After he swallows Thomas looks to his right, towards Lily. "Are you watching me chew?"
"It's the
muzzle,
" says Lily, around her bite, deciding to be frank. "It's weird and bizarre and fascinating."
"I know," says Thomas, quietly, nodding. "So can we talk about the muzzle?"
"Yes please!" says Lily, shuffling closer. "Can I start?"
"Sure," says Thomas, taking a bite.
"I thought for
sure
you'd be, like, a messy eater, with that thing."
Thomas chews, nods, swallows. "So you're pleasantly surprised that I'm not slopping pizza sauce all over myself and drooling."
"
Very
pleasantly surprised!" giggles Lily. "You're all... delicate and shit. I hate when people chew with their mouths open."
Thomas' eyes widen. "Oh my god that guy in line today, with the
gum.
I could hear him from two customers back."
"I saw!" says Lily. "Do people just not teach their kids how to chew, or what? Is this a thing that people have to learn?"
"I figured I would," said Thomas. "I kinda hid in the corner when I went for my lunch today. But as long as I wasn't thinking about it, it was alright."
"Is that a big thing?" Lily takes a bite and shamelessly talks with pizza stuffed into her cheek like a hamster, because frankly they have too much to discuss for decent manners. "Not thinking about it?"
"Yeah," says Thomas. "As long as I'm just going about my day like I'm not a fox, then it doesn't bother me at all. But when I have a minute to
notice
my body, it's like a part of my brain rebels and goes "Holy fuck, you're a fox and you've no idea how to pilot this thing." Y'know?"
"So I guess it's a
good
thing that we had the busiest day ever. Kept you from tripping over your tail."
"Exactly. Like, if you become aware of your breathing, your job becomes forgetting how to breathe so that you can get on with your day without thinking about breathing."
Lily feels exasperated. "Manual breathing enabled," she grumbles, "thanks for that. Distract me from it with more muzzle stuff, please."
"Okay, get this," says Thomas, crunching on the crust. "Cross your eyes and look at your nose, right? Now it's poking out into your field of view and you can't
not
look at it, right?" He extends a finger and holds it three or four inches in front of Lily's face. "My nose is
heeeeere.
"
Lily covers her nose. "Oh my God!"
"And it's there
all
the
time,
" says Thomas. "And these things -" he takes a whisker between thumb and forefinger - "they kinda
twitch
sometimes, y'know? So just as I'm starting to forget my muzzle, it's this sudden movement out of the corner of my eye and BAM, nosetown, population: me."
"That sounds
awful!
" says Lily, genuinely concerned.
Thomas waves a hand dismissively. "I'll probably get used to it," he says. "Probably won't drive me crazy. I mean, my dad's pretty sane. Like, he's
scarily
sane, sometimes."
"And your dad's a fox," says Lily.
"Yup."
"Did you find out that your dad's a fox this morning, too?"
"So..." Thomas swallows. "Shall I just tell you all about my morning?"
"Yes please," says Lily. "Were you a fox
straight away
when you woke up?"
"Yeah. So it went something like this." Thomas leans back on the couch and closes his eyes. "I'm in bed, obviously." He stretches his arms above his head, yawns theatrically, arches his back, reaches down with both hands to stretch his shoulders, encounters his tail between his legs. He opens his eyes, looks down at his tail and says "What the fuck?"
Lily giggles. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't laugh."
"Oh, you should." He grabs his tail. "What the fuck?!" He feels his face. "What the
fuck?!
" He pulls out his phone, opens the camera, aims it at his face - "Gee willikers, I'm some kind of fox creature! I guess I must be dreaming!"
Lily snickers. "Tom," she says quietly, "do you wear anything to bed?"
"Nope," says Thomas.
"So you got the full effect straight away," says Lily.
"Pretty much, yeah."
"Tom," says Lily, slyly, blushing, "was your tail
really
the first thing you noticed?"
"No," says Thomas, the insides of his ears pinkening, "I'm giving you the G-rated version. We'll -" he shakes his head, smiles, "we'll
get
to that. Anyway, I run into the bathroom, and I look at myself in the mirror, and nobody's hacked my phone camera and I'm a fox."
"Yikes," says Lily.
"Yeah, pretty much," says Thomas. "I was about to call you, but... I dunno why, I guess I thought "Fuck, maybe this is genetic or something," so I called my dad. Video-called him. And I couldn't talk, because I was looking at my own, y'know, the outgoing window, and my tongue kept getting all mixed up, and my dad said "hey look at me," and I did, and -" Thomas waves his arms in the air. "HE WAS A FOX TOO, and that was just a
bananas
way to start the day."
Lily giggles. "Jesus fuck."
"He gave me the Being A Fox 101, told me only him, my granddad, my mom and my old pediatrician knew about it, told me that someone else could see it too, and -" Thomas closes his eyes briefly - "
really
overemphasized that it was okay if it was a guy, as did my mom,
pretty
sure they assume I'm gay..."
"You brought girls home, when you still lived with them?" says Lily.
Thomas shrugs one shoulder, half-smiles, cocks his head to the side, talks quietly. "Well, y'know me, I'm kind of a shy guy, and distracted with school and jobs and friends, never really put myself out there, and I think it's pretty okay for them to keep open-minded like that, 'cause I'm probably bi anyway."
"Yeah, I remember," says Lily, sadly remembering a time last year, when Thomas had pined over a straight guy for a week or so. "Did you talk to your mom? What'd she say about all this?"