Howdy, folks. How are you doing? My name is Patrick John Hadelson. I am a six-foot-two, good-looking ( and I do say so) black man in his early twenties. I'm an Aquarius, and I am also a registered democrat. Oh, and I'm bisexual. Myra, my dear lady knows about it and she's cool, as long as I'm faithful to her. Which I am. She's the love of my life. I live in the city of Brockton, Massachusetts. I'm a recent college graduate, with a degree in criminal justice from Boston College. I've got big plans, you know. I want to be a police officer someday. And today is my wedding day. Oh, and did I mention that I am a vampire? Yeah, I am. I am still getting the hang of it. And you thought your life was complicated.
At this very moment, I am standing side by side with my bride-to-be at the altar. In a brightly lit church, surrounded by my family and friends. I can see my father Joseph and mother Linda sitting on the front row, along with my brothers Jonathan, Luther, Alexander and Casey and finally my sisters Nicole, Janice and Kendra. My best man Jeffrey Byrne winked at me and nodded. I smiled nervously. That so didn't make me feel better. On the other aisle sits my lady's family. Her father, United States Senator Rufus Thorne and her mother, Lady Desiree Thorne are sitting with grim expressions on their faces, surrounded by their friends and assorted lackeys.
I can feel Mr. Thorne's gaze on the back of my neck. He's always had it in for me, for as long as I can remember. The minister is about to start the ceremony. And I find myself feeling more terrified than the day I fell asleep on the roof and was exposed to sunlight. Now, sunlight doesn't kill vampires, but it can put you in a coma and turn you into a vegetable. Basically, it drains you of your life-force, your power. That's why we avoid it. It doesn't burn us to ash. It does much worse than that.
It took me a week to heal and even then I was never the same. Yeah, I'm feeling more nervous about my wedding than about eastern exposure. But what can I do? It's too late to change anything now. This marriage is supposed to symbolize the union of the two great vampire houses of North America, House Hadelson and House Thorne. If anything goes wrong, there will be civil war without end. And it's my ass that's on the line. My father already warned me that if I screw this up, he will personally shove me inside an incinerator and watch me burn. And you people ( humans) think you've got it so bad.
The minister asked me whether I, Patrick Louis Hadelson took Myra Jane Thorne as my lawfully wedded wife. I looked at her. Truly, she was something to behold. A six-foot-tall, statuesque young woman with light bronze skin, short blonde hair and a face supermodels would envy. She was slender but curvy and athletic at the same time. With a well-rounded booty that would make a porn star or video vixen green with envy. The lady was not only good-looking she also had pedigree. She was the daughter of Rufus Thorne, a tall, green-eyed and blond-haired, muscular male vampire who appeared to be in his late forties. He was much older than that. A long time ago, Rufus Thorne was worshiped as Thor, the Germanic Thunder God, protector of Scandinavia from invaders and a friend of humanity.
A long time ago, she who calls herself Myra Thorne was once known as the Norse Goddess Thrud, daughter of the Thunder God Thor. She'd been around for thousands of years, as like most men and women from the Great Houses. The leaders of the vampire world. Many are the men, immortal and human alike, who sought her heart. And she chose me. Lucky me. I heard myself say yes to the minister's question. Yes, I do take this woman to be my lawfully wedded wife. Then I kissed the bride. The entire church began to clap. I held my wife's hand and forced a brave smile. I've just thrown away my freedom for all eternity. Vampire marriages are truly till death did you part. Lucky me!
Things weren't always so complicated, though. Once, I had it good. Many would consider me fortunate to have been born one of the Hadelsons. The Hadelson clan is the cream of the crop among African-American vampires living in North America. To the human world, we are a family of billionaires. My mother Linda Hadelson is the Founder and General Manager of Ebony Universe Television, an African-American oriented television network. My father Joseph Hadelson is the founder of Hadelson College, an all-male, black-oriented private liberal arts school located in Boston, Massachusetts. He modeled it after prestigious Morehouse College, his alma mater. He also founded two private high schools, Hadelson Military Academy for guys and Hadelson Prep for girls. Both schools are also located in Boston. Yeah, the Hadelson family name commends respect in the human and vampire worlds.
What few people know is the fact that my father, Joseph Hadelson was once known as Osiris, the Egyptian God of the Dead. My mother was once known as the Goddess Isis, his beloved wife and loyal ally against the forces of evil. Yeah, my family has been around for thousands of years. My siblings are quite ancient too. My elder brother Jonathan was once known as the God Horus in ancient Egypt. Me? I'm not that old. I've only been around since 1985. The last offspring of my immortal parents. The family has labeled me a screwup ever since my birth. All because I'm a guy who likes to have his fun once in a while. Give me a break.
I left my parents mansion in Milton as soon as I could. I saw college as my great escape. And so I went to Boston College, a private Catholic school. As a whole, vampires are an atheist bunch. They're not really into religion, not since their downfall. You see, in ancient times, vampires lived among humans not as silent predators and creatures of mythology but as their deities. Using their vast abilities and incredibly long lifespan, they became the rulers of the human world. For thousands of years they reigned. They were the Olympian Gods of ancient Greece, the Ennead Gods of ancient Egypt and the Norse Gods of Scandinavia. Vampires, especially the older and more powerful ones, truly have great egos and a grand sense of self. They've always viewed humanity as their servants.
In the twenty first century, they continue to reign. This time, they're not pretending to be gods and goddesses anymore. Rather, they have learned to blend in. Humans no longer believe we vampires exist. So, my people lead normal lives as doctors, actors, lawyers, judges, corrections officers, firefighters, artists, construction workers, writers, professional athletes, teachers and television personalities. We own businesses. We go to school. We pay taxes. We lead our lives in the light of day, thanks to a special sun blocking cream treatment. How else could I go to class, attend school functions and play football for Boston College in front of thousands of screaming fans for four years? We're masters of discretion. We own the media. We own the police. We own the health care system. There are over three million of us living on planet Earth right now. And humanity still doesn't believe we exist.
Life as a vampire could be pretty good. You just had to follow the rules. Rule number one : Never let humans obtain proof that we exist. We're very careful. We don't hunt humans anymore. We get animal blood delivered to our houses and feed that way. Any human who discovers the existence of vampires is killed. And any vampire who deliberately exposes the rest of our community is killed. And last but not least, there is something which I must clear up. No human being can become a vampire. And no vampire can become human. Forget about the whole biting and blood transfusion thing. It just doesn't work. No one can 'make' or be made into a vampire. A vampire daddy and a vampire mommy are what's needed to make a vampire. Again, we're not like you. And we're not what you think. We may look alike but we're actually two very different species. We're not even members of the Homo Sapiens family. Our origins are unknown even to us. But planet earth has always been our home.
On the subject of vampire powers, there's a lot which I must clear up. I cannot turn into a bat. I don't know anyone who can. I am stronger and faster than an average human being, but not by much. I can see even in total darkness, and I can also hear a human heartbeat from a distance of forty feet. I can smell a person's unique scent across a distance of five hundred feet and track down even in a large crowd. Although super strong, I can't lift a car, or bend steel. I have the ability to regenerate, but it doesn't quite work like the healing ability of the X-Men's Wolverine. It takes longer. Oh, and forget what you read about silver, crucifixes and holy water. They don't do jack to us. Beside, we're mostly atheists. After all, I'm pretty sure we invented most of the world's major religions, to dominate humanity and exploit them. And it has given us nearly unlimited power for thousands of years along with wealth the likes of which most can't imagine.
There, you got it at last? Cool. Anyway, back to my tale. I was about to tell you folks why my clan hates my guts. I think it's mostly my lifestyle. Most vampires only pretend to be friends with humans. Other than work with them, we don't really associate with them. Not when given a choice anyway. We like to go places where we can be ourselves. There are all-vampire night clubs, all-vampire gyms, all-vampire private schools and all-vampire sports leagues. You should see football and basketball along with wrestling when the athletes playing are endowed with super strength and super speed. You might see something unforgettable.