This is the story of the first time a group of men used me against my will. I can't believe I'm sharing this but my therapist said maybe if I share more I'll stop acting out enough to deal with my PTSD. She thinks that the trauma of that days events are the reason I keep putting myself into situations where I'm likely to be taken advantage of and forced to do things by black strangers.
Ok, so this is what happened that day to a much younger, more innocent version of myself. My husband, Tom, was working and going to school. He's 5'11", 190 lbs. He has wavy dark hair and bedroom eyes that I fell in love with. I'm 5'4", brunette, with large breasts and an ass that has always garnered plenty of attention from the African-American men around here.
On Wednesdays he had a morning class at the local college, where he was working on his bachelor's degree. We had two kids and youngest had just started Pre-K. So on Wednesdays we had started this roleplay where he would tie me up somewhere, toy with my helpless body till I was hot and wet, then leave me tied up to go to class. When he got back a couple hours later he'd pretend to be a handyman or the cable guy or whatever and "rape" his helpless victim. This "rape" fantasy has been my dark secret since my early teens, probably the result of a strict Christian upbringing that left no room for a girl to openly want to be dicked down.
So we had been doing this for a couple of months. After the first few weeks Tom, my husband, had the idea that it would be fun to tie me to one of the outside lounge chairs. I'd always loved doing it outside because of the thrill of maybe getting caught. Two sides of our yard were bounded by woods and one by a neighbor who worked through the week and was never home. There was a wooden privacy fence that was about 6 or 7 feet tall. So Tom found a nice shady spot, teased me by sucking my nipples and lightly stroking my eager pussy until I was begging to cum and left me there. That morning I'm laying there spread eagled in the yard pulling at my restraints, wishing I could touch myself. In my mind I pictured to look on the faces of meter men or yard workers as they walked into our backyard to see a buxom 26 year old housewife nude, bound and helpless, and all the nasty things they'd do to me. I've always been thick, big tits and a fat ass, but back then I was young and supple and curved just right. So anyone who saw me tied down naked and helpless would have a sumptuous sight to see. I snapped out of this daydream when I heard a chainsaw starting up in the neighbor's backyard.
I look over and see one of those extension chainsaws thingies they use to cut high branches. Its slices through a limb of my neighbor's tree which crashes right in front of me, my lounger being right next to the fence. I hear somebody yell "MOTHERFUCKER!" on the other side. At this point I'm trying my best to Houdini my way out of my bonds. Tom usually tied slip knots, just in case there were an emergency or I had to use the restroom. But for some goddamn reason my husband tied me down good that day.
So I'm writhing around trying to get free as our next door neighbor James comes around the fence. I hold back a scream as his eyes graze over the limb, trying to estimate the damage. Then he spots my pale, naked body and his eyes get big. He runs straight over to me. At that point I'm desperately trying to close my legs to conceal my exposed, freshly waxed pussy, but my ankles are tied too far apart.
James really was shaken at first, seeing me naked, helpless and in obvious distress. He ran over and tried untying a knot. He was like, "Oh my god, Staci! Who did this to you? I'll call the police." Like an idiot I actually stopped him from untying me. I was afraid Tom would find out an what happened and be upset with me.
"No, no, James, its ok, I'm fine," I stammered,"Really."
I was soooo embarrassed. I'm sure my face and chest were red as a beet. My chest always gets flushed when I'm flustered. I'm sure he could see the shame and fear in my blue eyes.
"Me and Tom are j-j-just trying to spice things up," I sheepishly explained that my husband and I were playing a kinky game and that Tom would be back in about an hour and a half, and would he please please please just clean up the limb and promise to never tell Tom or any of the neighbors about this. We were the only white family in a few blocks and if word got around what kind of weird sex games we were playing we'd never be able to show our faces around the neighborhood.
I had just blurted all that out without thinking, and as soon as I said how long it would be till Tom got back James raised an eyebrow. Shit! That was a mistake I thought. I just lay there almost in tears waiting for his response. He just stood there for a moment before busting out laughing.
"Staci, Staci, Staci....." he shook his head, "What are we going to do with you?"
He eyed me up and down, his dark eyes hungrily examining my bare supple body from head to toe, shaking his head as I lay trembling. I wanted to die I was so embarrassed that this man was getting a free view of my exposed delights. Then he turned and picked up the limb and threw it over the fence. I breathed a sigh of measured relief as he walked around and picked up the loose sticks and debris. My stomach had been in a knot since I had first seen James come through the gate.
On the day we moved in, a light drizzle set in before we could unpack the moving truck. He was the only one of the neighbors who rushed over to help us. I thought he was a true gentleman for being so helpful, until I caught his eyes glued to my white cotton tank top that I hadn't realized was becoming more and more transparent as the drizzle dampened it. From then on he always that overly friendly neighbor who you know just wants to get in your panties. That was unless his wife was around. Then he was all business. And she always gave me the side-eye, like it was my fault her husband was creeping on me. He even came knocking on my door a couple of times when he knew I was alone, asking to borrow sugar or a tape measure, with the same cocksure grin as he had at this moment.
God, I'm actually shaking just writing this. As I write it out, I remember just how I felt then; naked, helpless, afraid, ashamed, embarrassed. And just like then that combination makes my pussy and nipples tingle like an electric current.
I thought I was off the hook when he was clearing the limbs and talking about how nobody had to find out. "Don't worry that pretty head of yours, Miss Staci," I remember him saying, "No one needs to know what a li'l freak you are. And Tom doesn't have to find out that I found you like this"
I think I muttered a weak thank you, thinking he was leaving. But instead he took his gloves off, knelt beside me and said, "Babygirl, this is gonna be our little secret." Next thing I knew his rough right hand was squeezing my tit while he gently slid the fingers of his left hand through the slick folds of my soaked pussy. I bit my lip to avoid screaming as my vision clouded with tears.
God I was so naΓ―ve back then. I actually thought this guy, who had been devouring me with his eyes for months, was just going to leave me there with my dignity and innocence intact. But if I'm honest with myself there's a part of me that wanted just what happened. James was in his mid 40s then, but he was handsome and worked out. He was tall and muscular, and even though I knew he was about to take advantage of me, somehow I knew he wasn't really going to really try and hurt me.
So as he molested me I told him "NO!!! Get your hands off me!! Stop it right NOW JAMES!"
He just chuckled, "Mmmm....girl you so wet. I know your freaky ass wants this. Weren't you and Tom pretending this was gonna happen. So relax girl. Your wish is about to come true."
"Don't you dare! Don't you fucking dare! I'll tell your wife!"
He just laughed,"OK, and I'll tell everyone around here what you and Tom do for fun."
He called my bluff.
"Please James. I can't. I love Tom, and it's against my religion to have sex with someone I'm not married to. "