Here I am arguing with my husband once again about his lack of sex drive. I like things to be more often, and he doesn't agree. I ask him to let me find a partner so I can have it more often, and he really doesn't agree. It's not like I'm asking for the world. Once a month would be nice instead of once or twice per year. I'm in my mid forties and in my prime, but I feel like I'm missing out. I've thought about just leaving him many times. Then I think about our kids and life together, and I think about how much I do love him despite his faults. Well, his one fault. He's damn near perfect in every other way. Every girl's dream guy.
When we met I had just broken up with my ex fiancé who had cheated on me. Crazy thing is that if he would have asked or even included me I would have been fine with it. Instead he did it behind my back, tried to cover it up, and then lied to me about it. A few days later into my life walks my now husband. He was a skinny long haired handsome young man of 18. His father had just passed a month before so we just talked all night. He called me the next day at the time he said he would, and then we talked every day. The hours slipped by talking about anything and everything.
Our first date he handed me a rose as he opened the door for me. We went to my favorite restaurant, saw a movie, and then he dropped me off kissing me before I walked into my house. I felt the sparks right there, and by sparks I mean major fireworks going off inside of me. It was weeks until out second date since I was still in school (I was a senior and 18), but that one went kind of the same except the kiss was much more deep.
Four months into it I was at his house with some friends, and we slipped downstairs to his sister's room. That was when the deep kisses turned passionate. I was so nervous, but still so excited and ready. I was tired of my fingers at that point so when he slipped into me it was so nice. I had an orgasm almost right away which was good because he filled the condom in less than five minutes. Mind you our friends were upstairs calling out for us. It was so exciting.
He never pressured me for anything. He would always ask my opinion on things, and included me whenever he could so when he proposed almost a year later I of course accepted. Even that was romantic sitting by a warm fire cuddling and sipping wine. Then he refilled my glass before dropping to one knee beside me. I was blown away. He let me plan everything for the wedding which we set four years into the future so I could have the day I wanted. All he wanted was a white tux and a salmon dinner.
Fast forward a couple decades, and here we are still very much in love. We have great kids, a big house, newer vehicles, and don't want for much. I work full time, as does he. Our schedules are set for the kids and household. He works days, and I work nights. We see each other for a few minutes before bed and in the morning. Otherwise we have the weekends that we spend as a family. It works for us.
I'd like to spend more time together, but things aren't as they were years ago when we met. He's no longer the skinny long haired hunk he was, and I'm not the 97 pound gymnast I once was. His short hair is getting some grays in it, and his belly has gotten much more pronounced. His chiseled good looks have developed a few wrinkles here and there, but it adds to his handsomeness. I've gotten a bit of a stomach. Who am I kidding? My belly is huge. I went from a size 1 to a size 24. My boobs got bigger which is the only bright spot I think. At five foot one my weight is way over what it ought to be. I've tried diets and I get a lot of exercise, but it just doesn't seem to go away. I'm not the girl every guy chases after anymore. Now they curl up their noses at the thought of seeing me naked.
Today we're having the same argument we always have. I want sex, but he's not interested. I thought he was being a gentlemen since he never pressured me into sex. I missed going at it like rabbits like I did with my ex, but I knew that he's not my ex. He is shorter and less endowed, but much better in every other way. Out first time was quick, but after that a quickie would last for hours. I'm not complaining about that at all. With my ex we fucked just about every day. Often times three or more times a day. We'd fuck anywhere and everywhere, but with my husband it's not so. He used to do things like that in the beginning, but it stopped over the years.
He doesn't like doing things outside of the bedroom, and he doesn't like to do much beyond missionary sex. Once in a great while he'll do me doggy style because he knows I like it, but that's about it. No cowgirl action happening here. Ever. He doesn't even like oral sex which I love. Sexually we're total opposites. I've even told him that he can date others, but he scoffed at me asking me why he'd want to? We've had this argument many times over the years. Most couples argue about money, but we argue about sex. Or lack there of.
I have enough, and go to bed. It's late anyway, and I know nothing is happening tonight. Tomorrow is Monday so it'll be another week without. It takes me a while to fall asleep, but when I do I really don't sleep very well. In the morning I get them all off to where they need to go, and then I sit back wishing I had a toy so I could take the edge off my frustrations. I made the decision not to have any of those things because of the kids. I do often regret it until I hear the horror stories of some girl's kid walking around with her dildo at a party or something. Then I'm glad I don't have to worry about that. Instead of pleasing myself I get things done around the house before work.
When I get into work I'm introduced to the new employee Thomas. I'm told that I'll have to train him on our systems and have him ready to work alone in a week. That's a tall order since we're again switching systems, and I'm not even sure how to work the new one myself yet. But I have no choice so I introduce myself with a handshake.
"Hi. I'm Michele." I say with a smile. "Welcome to our humble cubicle city. Do you have any experience doing this kind of work?"
"I've worked in web type of support for the last ten years so I have some understanding." He says reassuring me.
His short brown hair, six foot something muscular body, and his cleanly shaven face showing off his handsome face are clearly capturing my attention. He doesn't look old enough to have worked anywhere for ten years.
"What did you do before that?" I ask.
"I work a customer service style of job before that for an insurance company. I got bored with it so I went to school for web development, and so far it's landed me at my last job which promised me over and over that I'd be put in development. That never happened so I started looking around. This job offered more money, and better benefits so here I am."
"That sounds kind of like me except I never went to school for development. I worked in customer service since I was in my early twenties."
"So for a year or two?" He jokes.
"Yeah. A year or two." I laugh.
We chat about everything through the week as I train him on the old system as well as the new one. He learns fast so it's a nice break from the usual going over everything ten or twelve times before they ask again how to do things. I find out that he's a year older than I am, and divorced with two kids. He's surprised when I tell him my age since I'm often told that I look way younger than I am. I tell him that I'm married with children, and we just seem to click.
Another coworker informs him of the Friday night ritual of stopping for drinks after work. I don't usually go so I forgot to mention it. He seems disappointed when I tell him that, and tells me to go so he has someone to talk to there. I think he should get to know the other two members of our team so I accept under the condition my husband doesn't have an issue with it.
"Hey sweetie, they want me to go out with them after work. Are you good with that?"
"What do I care? Go out, have fun, and call if you need a ride home."
"Good to go." I say to the three sets of eyes staring at me. "Thomas, this is Linda and Barb. Girls this is Thomas."
They shake hands before we make for the exit with me trailing as usual.
"Come on girl. The beer's getting warm." Linda says.
"I have short legs so it takes me a bit longer." I joke.
"Well, you have a tall one here that I wouldn't mind walking up on me." Barb whispers in my ear as I catch up.
I smile, and try to not laugh. At least I'm not the only one that thinks he's cute. We make our ways to out cars, and meet at the bar a mile up the road. It's fairly crowded, but we find a table to sit at. Thomas sits beside me which I kind of expected. What I didn't expect was the way the crowd was that he'd be sitting so close. It makes me uneasy in so many ways.
Barb returns handing me a drink, and distracts me from my uneasiness. She tells me to just drink it, and like it. I taste it, and it's actually really good. It tastes fruity with a slight alcohol aftertaste. The drink goes down fast as we chat about work, and the calls we've all had from irate people that can't figure out how to type their own names. Thomas fits right in as though he's worked with us for years. It's not much past my second drink that I'm feeling the buzz starting.
"Drink up girl. You never come out with us so you have to make up for it." Linda shouts over the music.
"I'm good. Whatever these are they're plenty strong." I answer.
"That's because they're supposed to be strong." Barb says. "We're getting you drunk tonight, and you can't say no."
"I have to drive home though."
"One of us will give you a ride, or you can just crash at my house." Linda offers. "Now let loose, and quit being so uptight."
I really don't want to get drunk, but the drinks in me already are getting me there fast. I drink the one in front of me which was almost gone just in time for Thomas to set another down for me. I sigh as I switch glasses putting the full one in front of me as he sits beside me. Close beside me. I don't know if it's the drinks, or if he's actually closer, but it feels like he's cuddling up next to me.
I can feel his body pressing against my right side. His chest pressed right tight to my arm as we talk over the noise. I feel so uneasy, but I just let it happen. The drinks are telling me to not worry while my mind is going crazy throwing red flags everywhere. Then I realize that my body is telling me that it's hoping for more as I feel my crotch flush. I excuse myself to go to the bathroom, and Barb chums along.
"He's such a hunk, and he's so nice. I wonder what he looks like naked?" She says as we walk. "He seems to have taken a liking to our little Michele though so I'll never get to know."
"He just feels comfortable with me. We've been training all week so he knows me better than he knows you two."
"I don't know. He's sitting awful close so he must feel really comfortable."
"That's just because it's loud in here."
"Call it what you want. I say he's got it for you. You're so damn lucky girl. I envy you."
