I walk into the bar with a calm, confident smile on my face and a tiny bounce in my step. I don't need to look in a mirror to know that I'm radiating friendliness, approachability, the qualities that attract friends--friends, and in a place like this, something more. I know I'm pretty, but not so pretty that other women will be jealous of me. I know all this without needing to be told, because that's exactly the kind of woman I've been X'ed to be. I wasn't always like this, I know. I used to be M, but now I don't even remember what that means anymore.
It makes it impossible to G Master's will, his power over me. How can I? The word has been taken out of my vocabulary, replaced with the abstract symbol of a letter in the alphabet. All the emotional responses to finding out that my best friend W'ed and R'ed me, turning me into Master's Q... they don't even begin to trigger, because how can I get angry at a handful of random letters? The train of thought just dead-ends, unable to follow into the parts of my mind that Master has sealed away from me. If I could follow them, then maybe I could G. But I can't G, because I'd have to know what it meant before I could do it and that's locked away behind the wall of Master's will. So instead, I obey. It's the only thing I know how to do.
Tonight, obedience means finding Jenny. I spot her over in a corner, with Audra and Phillipa, the three of them laughing at a private joke. That's exactly as expected; Audra and Phillipa are my fellow Q's, here to help me tonight as we finish the process of R'ing Jenny. We've been working at it for almost a month now, getting her to trust us, but Master is patient. Tonight, that patience pays off. Tonight, Jenny becomes his newest Q.
Briefly, I wonder exactly why Master wants us to R Jenny. Is there some quality she has that he wants or needs? Does something about her job or her family mean that she'll be in a position to help him N something, or R someone? Or even P someone...but it's impossible to sustain the train of thought. It runs into too many forbidden concepts, too many things Master doesn't want me to think about, and it crumbles. It doesn't matter why Jenny, any more than it mattered why Audra R'ed me. It's Master's will, that's all that matters. We R who we R. It's just that simple.
I sit down next to Phillipa, leaning across to give Jenny a warm kiss on the cheek. I feel the brush of Phillipa's breasts against my arm, and I know Jenny notices. We've been teasing her like that almost since we met. She hasn't said anything, but I know she's noticed and I know the curiosity has been part of what's kept her seeing us. She doesn't know we know about the advertisement she put in the personals section, the one where she described herself as "bi-curious". She'll get to indulge that curiosity, of course, but only at Master's whim. He likes to watch us F each other. I think it's why he has so many Q's.
"So good to see you!" Jenny says. "God, it feels like it's been weeks!" I hear the slight slur in her speech, a sign that Audra and Phillipa have been doing their job. By the time we finally B her drinks, we want her to be drunk enough that people won't be surprised she's passed out.
"I know!" I squeal out. It's actually only been three days, but we've been Y'ing her to miss us when we're gone. At least one of the three of us has been with her constantly over the last month, giving her unconditional affection and emotional support. By the time all of us withdrew from her a few days ago, she felt miserable and unloved without our presence. We all gave reasonable excuses, of course, but she naturally assumed she must have done something wrong for us all to abandon her. When we called her and asked her to meet us tonight, the return of the affection she'd been worried about losing forever was absolutely ir'G'ible.
"But you know how it is," I continue, my voice apologetic. "My boss has been such an asshole all week long. Mandatory overtime, double shifts, it's been absolutely impossible to find a M night to see you." I don't actually say "M", of course. My mouth can say the words, just as my body can perform the tasks when Master commands it. It's only my mind that refuses to acknowledge the concepts. I can't hear what I say when I talk about M or R or Q or P.
Sometimes, I know, it's because Master doesn't want me to think about what I am or what I'm doing. If I could connect my actions together and understand what it was he wanted me to do, perhaps I'd be so horrified that it would break his Y'ing and allow me to G. But if I'm just R'ing someone, I can't be horrified. How can you feel moral revulsion over a straight line with a couple of squiggles attached?
"Well, I'm glad that you finally managed to break M for a night of fun," Jenny says. Her eyes are shining with excitement, and I know it's Phillipa's doing. She's been commanded to make our flirting a little bit more overt tonight, to suggest to Jenny that this might just be the night when she gets to make some of her fantasies come true and F one of us. Or even all of us. It's true, of course; Master might just command us all to do exactly that. But mostly it's part of the plan. Jenny's been spending so much time fantasizing about Phillipa's body that she hasn't kept track of how much she's had to drink, or what exactly happened to her cell phone. (Audra N'ed it and ditched it three bars ago.) She hasn't thought about updating her other friends about where she is. And right now, she's so busy staring at my tits that she doesn't even notice the B that Audra slips into her drink.
It doesn't take effect right away. We don't want anything so fast-acting that she slumps over mid-sentence; that might attract attention to us. Instead, the slur in Jenny's voice becomes more and more pronounced over the next few minutes, and she winds up leaning against Phillipa in a way they're both enjoying. Audra and I enjoy it too; we've been Y'ed to feel sexual pleasure when we follow Master's commands, and every detailed step of Jenny's L and R'ment is one of his commands. As I watch Jenny's eyelids flutter lower and lower, it spikes my arousal level higher and higher. I conceal it, of course, just as I've been X'ed to do, but there's no question I'll be finger-F'ing myself later on when Master allows it.
Finally, when Jenny's eyes are closed more often than they're open and her head sways back and forth as she struggles to hold it upright and she only answers about half the questions we ask her, and those with half-mumbled gibberish, we come to an unspoken agreement. "Time to get you home, Jenny," Phillipa says. "You've had a few too many."