It was just a dinky little Chrystal Heights convenience store, but I didn't care. All I wanted was a couple candy bars and something to drink.
I took a beverage from the cooler. I opened it and began drinking on the spot. It was cool and refreshing, just like the advertisements said.
"Excuse, Miss?"
I turned around. It was the little old guy who owned the store. I had suspected he was going to give me a hassle. He had been watching me the entire time when I had eaten several candy bars in the candy aisle. His pained expression when I threw the wrappers on the floor had been hysterical.
"Yeah?" I said.
"Could you please pay for that before you drink it?" he said.
Oh, great. Like I needed this aggravation. "No," I said, "I won't pay for it before I drink it. I'll drink it when I want."
The old guy held up his hands. "Please, Miss," he said, "I'm not looking for any trouble here. I just need you to pay for the drink and the candy bars."
I looked down at the guy. "Hey, I don't need your attitude, grandpa," I said, waving my hand like I was shooing a fly. "Why don't you just go back behind your counter and quit hassling me, okay?"
He looked pained. "Miss, please," he said. "All I'm asking is that you pay-"
"And all I'm asking," I said, cutting in, "is that you shut the hell up."
"Miss," he said, "Please. I'd rather you didn't make me to resort to force-"
"Resort to *force*, old man?" I said. This was actually funny. "You? I'm twenty years old. You're, what, eighty?"
"Sixty," he said. "Is it truly necessary to be so abrasive?"
"It might be," I said. "What's abrasive?"
He sighed. "I just meant is it really necessary to do this?"
"Hey," I said, "I didn't start this, old man. You did."
"Please," he said, "just pay for the stuff you took and leave. Please."
"Bite me," I said. "No one tells me what to do."
"I'm sure that's the case," he said. "However, I do have to ask that you pay and leave now."
"Make me," I said.
"Miss, please-"
I pushed his shoulder. "C'mon, old man," I said. "Make me. What are you gonna do, kick my ass?"
Yes, I was being a bitch. So, sue me.
The old man stared at me for several seconds, almost like he was concentrating. Finally, he said, "Fine, you can stay. Just make sure you keep your shoes on."
The old man had obviously not been paying attention when I told him no one tells me what to do. I kicked off my sneakers and then slipped off my socks. I tossed my socks on top of my shoes.