First time writing this type of subject matter, don't see myself continuing it unless I get a really good idea (this took months on and off in between work). Hope it's good.
With a few more algorithms programmed and a final workaround, I was putting the final touches on an app's alpha I had been developing. A cure, a slimmer of hope for people who have been through the struggle I have been through.
A few years ago, I sank myself into a deep depression, which nearly tanked my budding college career as I worked to bring myself out of it. And with the work of therapy, medication and various other factors getting better for me in life, I am in a better place than I was before. Still, I felt like there had to be a better way towards recovery, and I finally figured out what to do.
My mom, Nicki, had just come back from the gym. Well, stepmom. At this point she might as well be, with my bio mom having just left soon after I came to be. Got "too real" or something. It's been two decades since my dad remarried to this then-recent South Korean immigrant, and I would say I was blessed growing up.
Nicki is 47 years old, and keeps herself in better shape than most women her age or even my age. Not quite a six pack... maybe a four-pack? I made sure to never stare too long at her body from the front, especially in her workout clothes. Her bosom was moderately sized, but her fitness kick in the past two years or so has given her whole torso a slim, muscular form that helped compliment her various sports bras. She especially made sure to tone her legs and glutei, giving her an incredible ass. And even after a sweaty workout, she still managed to maintain a good looking face.
With her jet-black hair in a ponytail, she double-stepped up the stairs to say hi to me, slightly out of breath. She was glistening with sweat through her dark-gray yoga pants and blue Under Armor sports bra.
"Hey Owen, you planning on going to the gym today?" Nicki asked.
"Maybe later, right now I'm finally finishing my app today after months of work and planning," Owen said.
"Gotcha, maybe I can check it out after a shower!" Nicki said with a smile. "It's great you can finally take a break from your work."
"Thank you!" I said. "And that sounds good, let me know when you get out."
I turned my attention back to the app, in astonishment I finally completed what I considered to be a huge breakthrough in science and personal development.
Once she finished showering, Nicki came into my room and changed into something for a night in: slim-straight jeans, violet shirt with a white cardigan and a lighter amount of makeup. Her hair was also let down to her left shoulder.
She took a seat on my bed as I took a sigh of relief, knowing my work can finally be tested.
"I'm really proud of all the work you've done in the past year since graduating," Nicki said with a smile. "You've had a lot of setbacks but I can see you're in a good place now."
Coyly, I blushed and sputtered out "Thank you, uh, Nicki." I had a huge grin on my face and gave her a hug.
That was another great thing about Nicki, she always knew how to be a supportive figure and informal at the same time. As she's a professor of journalism at Hannett University, she was very charming and is the teacher you'd invite for coffee after graduating. Both men and women have invited her for "friendly chats," and I figure at least half of them are using their catchups as a quasi-date.
"But today I've finally finished the app," I say, pulling away from the hug. "It's a way to relax your brain after feeling tired. Like how there's a lot of white noise or meditation videos on Youtube, this is a version that'll make you feel rejuvenated in a couple of minutes."
"Oh damn," Nicki said, "that's a pretty bold claim."
"I essentially wanted to make it an antidepressant for people who aren't in a good enough place to get them... like I was before."
Nicki took a pause and said "That's such a great idea for a project, and I know it's going to work." She took a deep breath and said, "You're very smart, Owen, even brighter than your father. And... I've had my own struggles with depression at times."
This was news to me. She hasn't opened up about this type of problem.
"Some days I just wanted the days to be over as soon as I woke up. And while I don't have it as bad now, I think it could help someone like me who hasn't been to a therapist in at least five years-"
"Five years?" I asked, flabbergasted.
"Where I'm from, we don't make it a priority to carry our feelings on our sleeves like everyone else. I always am going to be happy and content with you and my family, but some days I need to hide how happy I am with myself that day."
There was a long pause. I didn't quite know what to say. Nicki played with her hair as some sort of way to distract herself from what she just said. I thought of reaching my hand out to her, but held back. Not my place.
"So... would you want to be the first person to give this app a go?" I asked.
"Yeah!... Yeah, sounds great." Nicki said, composing herself.
"Great! I developed it on my iPad and it should be fully charged. Click the app called 'I'm Okay,' it should have a happy emoji as the logo."
Nicki went through and pulled up the homepage I made. It was great to see someone using my software for the first time. It's brand-new to them, an odd feeling after months of coding before even having an alpha ready.
"Also put these headphones on, it'll make the experience better if I did everything correctly."
Nicki put on the wraparound headphones and made a few gestures acting like she was a DJ. I got a laugh out of that.
Nicki clicked "BEGIN" and started watching the pattern on the screen. With this fast-paced electronic technique, I believed it could help people feel better mentally to take the day ahead of them.
Nicki stared into the spiral with a curious look in her eye. That spiral became a series of hexagons, changing colors, abstract shapes... many types of things over the course of two minutes. Unusually, she started to drool in her lap.
"Oh shit," I said, worried about its effectiveness on my stepmom.
Her eyes would drift from opening wide to being close to asleep. They occasionally rolled up to her forehead. The sounds that stayed locked in her headphones were a series of tones conditioned to rewire your brain's production of serotonin and dopamine. Were there side effects to this? I heard a dull purr come out of her body. This was making me nervous. She reminded me a bit of a zombie. I found myself picking at my thumb's hangnail.
