For two years, I have been wishing, dreaming and asking him to go with me. You would think that he would appreciate a few days in nature. Shit-as much as he smokes trees, being amongst them and smoking some has got to be an even higher experience. But I aināt begging no man to be with me. Like I said, Iāve wanted this time away from the kids, work, bills and even him.
I got angry this last time I mentioned the getaway and he started to give me his excuse. I didnāt even hear it! Before he could get the words out of his mouth, I was quoting a āCedricā line, āIām a grown ass woman, Iāll go by myself.ā I was mostly just talking trash until he questioned that very womanhood with āYea right, your punk ass aināt going nowhere by yourself!ā That was Monday. Today is Friday and Iām in my Volvo, listening to Will Downing, driving to Upstate NY. It was a pay week and Presidentās Day weekend. Money and an extra day off! I had to do it!
He watched me pack, snickering, as if I wouldnāt really go by myself. My kids kept asking if I would be scared and if they could come along. The more I thought about it though, the more I realized that it might really be good for me to get away.
I mentioned my trip to my boss, Mr. Stein, as I was searching online trying to find a cabin. It was February and cold and I didnāt know anything about any cabins. Sure enough, he had a few buddies that he golfed with that had āwinter havensā, as he called them. He gave me their numbers, I contacted them and Mr. Matthewās was available this weekend. He called it Mocha Point and I could go and stay for free. It canāt get much better than that. This trip was meant to be; it was too easy to come together.
So here I am. I have just pulled off the interstate and I feel like I just opened an imaginary closet door and been exposed to a new world. The sky is magnificent. It has opened up even wider and the color of it is so serene. I even turned off the CD player. The trees are tremendous in size and their branches, although covered in snow, seem to extend and welcome me.
I glance at the directions and notice again that the road I am looking for is called Velvet Way. āLet me find out that Mr. Matthews likes dark thingsā I say and chuckle. Up until this point, I guess I had just assumed that Mr. Matthews was white, but maybe I was wrong.
My directions tell me that this is my final road and my destination is 7 miles up. I feel so light and free. The road is full of curves and is covered on both sides by trees. There is no snow on it, as the trees provided a shelter. I see a family of deer ahead on my left in the open space past the trees. They are not even frightened by the sound of my car. It is as if they know that anyone in this area doesnāt need to be feared and that alone gives me peace.
I am amazed that I am not scared at all. It is true that I donāt like being by myself. I donāt like the dark, but this feels different. This place feels safe and I feel secure.
I am so busy admiring the deer family that I donāt even notice the cabin at first.
It is the most amazing place I have ever seen. To call it a cabin is clearly not enough. It is massive and is constructed from huge bleached logs. There are windows that go from the floor to the roof on the front and rear of the cabin. Once parked, I just stand there, admiring the beauty.
Mr. Matthews has told me that his nephew lived on the land and that although he had told him that I wanted some āmeā time, that I shouldnāt be surprised if the nephew made sure I had everything that I needed. The family used a mailbox out back for guests. I was told to make a note of anything I needed and place it in the box. Mr. Matthews assured me that I would probably never see him-that his name was Dale and he usually kept to himself, that he didnāt care for city life. Dale built the cabin and because he wasnāt married or attached he, cared for the family land. He was a ranger and lived on the property in another home.
Inside, I notice the bookshelves are as tall as the windows and full of all different types of literature. The interior of the home is not as rustic as I would have thought. Someone younger or more eclectic had remodeled this space. The furniture, while still wood, is much more contemporary and the place feels more like a home than just a vacation cabin.
There is stunning African art and sculptures placed all through the space.
I walk around and admire the family pictures. Amongst all of the women in the pictures, I only notice three men. I smile to myself at the thought of any of them being the man beautiful enough to construct this home. I wonder which one of these fine ass men were considerate enough to have a fire already lit for my arrival. I will leave a thank you in the box Mr. Matthews told me about.
I walked around for a few more minutes before I reminded myself that I had the next three days to see everything in here.
As I carried the bags up to the bedroom, I cursed myself for bringing so much stuff. Iām in the woods, alone-there will be no going out, probably no need to put on anything other than my jeans and a t-shirt for outside and that same t-shirt and some panties for inside, if that!
The upstairs is completely open space. There is a king sized poster bed in the middle of the floor. There is a skylight directly over the bed and I canāt wait for nightfall to look at the stars. How can anyone design something so amazing and not live in it.
I place my bags in the closet, take off my shoes and go stand at the window. I can see another cabin from up here. There is someone standing in that window, looking over here. I assume that it must be Dale. I fold my hands and bow to say thank you to him, and he responds by spreading his arms as if to welcome me to all that I can see. I am kind of disappointed that I may not get to meet him.
I thought for sure that no woman would actually come here alone. Most women wouldnāt. Sheās different though and this stranger piques my curiosity. I saw how she stopped the car and watched the deer family; the look of astonishment on her face when she turned and faced the cabin. It made me smile with pride. She admired my work and I can tell she appreciates things small and large. Thatās a good thing. I canāt deny how beautiful she is. She was natural-no make-up, no designer clothes, nice and thick! I felt my body warm staring at her and I realized that it had been quite some time since I had actually cuddled with a woman. It has been over two years since a woman caressed me. I had just wanted to start a fire for the guest, but for sure she had started one in me-and it felt so right.