Eep This Secret

It's an old conflict. What do you do when you love someone who is better off without you? Here in Chapter 19, David finds himself in that position. He also finds a unique way to cure a nasty woman of very bad manners.

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Esta called one afternoon to say she was excited. She'd purchased her very first car. Nothing fancy. Nothing new. It was a late model Toyota that was a bit cramped for me, but fit her little frame perfectly. It put a smile on that face that usually looked so serious. It was a small one, but definitely a smile.

She gave me a ride, then took me to her condo unit so we could make love for the first time in weeks. I was in relationships with a lot of women back then, and I knew there was a danger I wouldn't be able to give them all the attention they deserved. I'm embarrassed to say that was happening with Esta. She'd grown to love me deeply, and she deserved better than what I gave her.

Otherwise, Esta was thriving. She'd attended our workshops on many topics, and the sessions on budgeting seemed to have helped her most. She had savings, and a retirement account, and money left over for things like a nice car. She was saving receipts and keeping track of Uber bills to use as tax deductions. She no longer wasted money on things like beer, cigarettes, and lottery tickets. Lifting her emotional burden had improved her life in many ways. She had a lot of friends, from dancers at the club to other clients of the foundation. The foundation clients spontaneously came together into a kind of sisterhood where they helped each other. Esta volunteered to babysit for single moms, which was a blessing for the mothers and a pleasure for Esta.

She had so much fun taking care of other people's children that I began to see I'd used the sonic stimulator to undermine one of her core values. I'd made her think she could be satisfied being in a childless open relationship, but that just wasn't the kind of woman Esta needed to be. She wanted a husband. A real home. Babies. She wanted all the normal things, and she wasn't going to get them unless I let it happen.

That's what I was thinking one night when I went to see Esta and Mary dance. The frequent sex I was having did nothing to diminish my enthusiasm for having cocktails while watching naked women dance. It was especially fun on nights that new dancers made their debuts.

On this particular night, I saw a new dancer who called herself Diamond; I later learned her real name is Margo. She was very cute, but that's no surprise because this was a high-class club that paid dancers well and only hired the best. She had long brown hair that was nicely styled. Her implants weren't as good as Mary's, but they looked good. Tall, with a trim physique. A few tattoos.

Mary was taking her break and sitting at my table when Margo came on stage. "She looks nice," I said.

Mary rolled her eyes. "That girl is a pure bitch. Everything that comes out of her mouth is nasty. She's only been here a few nights, and already everybody hates her."

"Really? What does she do?"

"David, she finds so many ways to be rude that it's just weird. She's stuck up, insensitive, insulting - it's kind of hard to describe, but impossible not to see. It's only a matter of time until one of the girls gets into a bitch fight with her."

"Wow. That sounds unpleasant," I said.

"Somebody needs to teach her some manners," Mary said.

That got me thinking. The sonic stimulator was capable of changing behavior in profoundly powerful ways. Could it teach a person to be more humane? I wanted to know. Also, I'd been thinking of something else I wanted to try. Maybe Margo could be my guinea pig.

"Does she have a husband, or boyfriend?" I asked.

Mary looked at me and smiled. "No, David. I get the feeling that she can't keep a boyfriend because she is such a turbocharged bitch. She's pretty enough to attract a man, but she's such an awful person, she can't keep one. Are you thinking of having sex with her? I don't think that will be much fun."

"I think I might be able to teach her some manners," I said.

Mary paused for a second, then laughed out loud. "Are you planning to give her a spanking? I don't think that will work, David."

"No, that's not what I had in mind," I said.

"You are certainly welcome to try. If you don't come home tonight, I'll just figure you're giving Margo etiquette lessons. With your cock. Good luck with that. It would be nice if it works, but I don't see a cure for what's wrong with that little cunt."

"We'll see," I said.

I arranged to get a lapdance with Margo, and I turned on the sonic stimulator before she even closed the door to the booth. "One of the other girls told you a secret about me," I said.

"I know your secret," Margo said.

"They told you I have a great big cock. It's huge. Much bigger than anything you've seen before," I said.

"Huge," Margo said.

"You want to see my cock. You want to touch it. You want to feel it stretch out your pussy."

"I want it."

Margo reached down and ran her hand across the front of my pants. I'd been getting a boner - having a naked woman rub against me tends to have that effect - but I quickly became hard as stone.

"Ohhhhhhh. You're so big," she said.

This seemed to answer my main question. I wanted to know if I could make Margo believe my cock was enormous, even after she felt it. So far, the illusion seemed to be something she believed, although the reality was that my cock is just a bit bigger than average.

I'll make this quick. Margo invited me to her apartment, and she pressed up against me as soon as she closed the door behind us. She immediately reached for my cock. "You're so big," she said. "I don't know if I can take all that."

"You'll be fine," I said. "We just have to take it slow."

We removed each other's clothes, and when Margo finally saw my cock, she had a look of wonder on her face. "That's bigger than I've ever seen," she said. "That's bigger than anything I've seen on a sex video, and the guys in those are huge."

I turned on the sonic stimulator. "You're going to like it," I said. "But I need you to do something first, Margo."

"What, David? I'll do anything for you."

"Margo, I'm sure you know that the people think you're rude. That's not true. You are a nice person, and you like to treat people politely. From now on, I want you to be careful to treat everyone with kindness. You'll promise, won't you?"

"I promise," Margo said. All the while, she ran her hand up and down my cock. She kept looking at it. I kept talking about her manners, finding several different ways to say the same thing. My ultimate goal was to give Margo a more charitable view of other people, and to act accordingly.

It finally seemed I'd done everything I could think of. It was time for my reward - and hers.

"Why don't you go down on me?" I asked.

"David, I'm sure that thing won't fit in my mouth. But I know something that should be almost as good." With that, Margo began licking my cock like a lollipop. The expression on her face was like something approaching worship. It didn't seem to matter that she was seeing and touching my cock. In her eyes, it was much larger than it was in reality. Neat, eh? The sonic stimulator could make people deny the evidence of their senses.

"I want this thing inside me," Margo said.

She straddled my body and lowered her pussy onto my cock. She hadn't received a bit of foreplay, but she was soaking wet anyway. "David, this is so tight," she said when she pushed the head of my cock inside her. In reality, things were pleasantly snug, but Margo was gritting her teeth and squeezing her eyes closed, acting as though my cock was splitting her in half.

She kept pushing down, working my cock inside her one tiny bit at a time. Margo acted as though it was hard work. "This is the wildest thing I've ever felt," she said. "I don't know how much more I can take."

"You can take it all," I said. "Just keep at it."

And that's what she did. Margo acted as though it took a tremendous effort to go up and down on my cock. She gradually got me deeper and deeper, panting as though it was the hardest thing she'd ever done. When she finally got my cock all the way inside her pussy, she started to cum. And it wasn't a little, gentle climax. It was a big, strong one that made her shake all over, and ended with her collapsing on the bed beside me.

I climbed on top of her and shoved my cock all the way inside in one smooth thrust. "David!" she said, her eyes wide. "Be careful!"

I slowed down, but continued sliding all the way inside her. She let out little gasping noises, as though it hurt a little to feel so much of me inside her. I'd always wondered what it would be like to have a cock big enough for a porn actor. My cock was big enough to get the job done, and I'd never gotten any complaints, but I'm smart enough to know that some women enjoy a bigger piece of meat once in a while. It was exciting to see how Margo reacted. It made me feel like a real stud.

She came again. This was another strong orgasm, and she went limp afterward. I stopped trying to delay my own orgasm, and I came very soon afterward.

"Oh God, David. That was incredible," Margo said. "They were right about you. Your cock is gigantic. I'm all stretched out now."

She rolled over on one side and reached down. Margo wrapped her hand around my cock. "God, it's huge even when you're soft," she said.

"If you keep that up, I won't be soft for long," I said.

"Really? Can you do that again?" she said.

"Not right this second, but I'm sure I can be ready in a few minutes. If that's what you want," I said.

"Oh, I definitely want that," she said.

Margo and I actually had sex two more times that night. She was limping when she walked me to the door. "It's going to take me a while to recover from tonight," she said.

"I'm sure you'll be back to normal by morning," I said.

I didn't think much more about Margo until a few weeks later, when I went back to the club to watch Mary dance. When it was time for Margo's set, Mary said it seemed like she was a changed woman.

"Somehow, Margo is nice now," Mary said. "She's polite. Considerate. Did you do that?"

"Maybe," I said.

"How? What did you do to her?"

"We just had a heart-to-heart conversation," I said.

"But she didn't have a heart! And I have no idea how she suddenly grew one," Mary said.

"I think Margo was ready for a change. All it took was for someone to give her a little push," I said.

Mary gave me one of those looks I see when she seems to be thinking there's something weird about my powers of persuasion. It may become necessary for me to use the sonic stimulator to remind her that there's nothing unusual happening.

At about that time the DJ introduced Esta, A.K.A. Esmerelda. She had a happy look on her face, but it just reminded me of the fact that she wasn't living the life she wanted. Yes, it was nice that she was making a lot of money. She was having a very nice time making love with me. But she didn't want a part-time boyfriend. She needed more.

It would have been easy to use the sonic stimulator to encourage Esta to begin seeing other guys, but I had a feeling that she wasn't very good at judging men. Her previous boyfriend had been a disastrous mess, and I was afraid she'd end up with the same kind of guy. I eventually came up with an idea that scared me a little. I felt there was a danger that I'd put Esta in a situation that might break her heart. I only did it because I had to do something, and I had no other ideas.

Allow me to introduce you to Fred, my auto mechanic. I was driving a pretty lousy car when I moved to California. All those years as an impoverished grad student had ensured that my car was a pile of crap. I gravitated to a repair shop near my apartment, and I was there so often it didn't take long for me and Fred to be on a first name basis.

We had some interesting conversations. He'd learned a lot about vehicle repairs in the Army. When he got out of the service he used the GI Bill to buy a nice big house. The idea was that he'd find a wife and they would get right to work filling that big house with little babies. That was the plan.

It didn't work for a lot of reasons. Fred wasn't particularly handsome. He had a good job and he worked hard, but he was conspicuously blue collar. He was shy. He had no game at all. He'd tried dating apps with no success. It left him feeling discouraged and lonely. Fred was a nice guy who deserved better.

I'm sure you see where this is going.

"Fred, I'd like to introduce you to a woman I know," I said. "You two have a lot in common. You might like each other."

"Yeah?" Fred said, looking and sounding skeptical. He'd probably had people try to fix him up in the past, and it hadn't helped.

"Yeah. She's a very nice woman. She's honest, like you. She works hard, like you. She's currently dating a nice guy, but she wants more than a casual relationship. She's not a girly girl, but she's a real woman who wants to be with a real man. A man like you."

Fred smiled. "You're about to tell me she has a nice personality, right?"

"Fred, she's absolutely beautiful. Here, I'll show you a picture," I said, using my cell phone to display one of my photos of Esta. I picked one where she was fully clothed.

Fred's eyes got big and wide. "This is her?! My God, she's a knockout!"

"That's an accurate description," I said.

Fred was quiet for a moment. "That woman is out of my league. It would never work. Thanks anyway, David."

Wow. Years of rejection and loneliness had left a big bruise on Fred's ego. This was a job for the sonic stimulator. I took back my phone, began playing the sound file, and started making the pitch I'd rehearsed before getting there.

I told him Esta was an exotic dancer, but that he respected those women as hard workers who provided wholesome, sex-positive entertainment for men who needed it. I told him he would be overwhelmed by her beauty when he actually saw her in person. I told him she would welcome his attention. I told him a few other things, and I ended by arranging a time to take him to the club so he could meet Esta.

Before that happened, I had a similar session with Esta, convincing her that it was alright for her to date men other than me because we had an open relationship. I praised Fred and told her she'd like and respect him from the moment they met. I told her I showed Fred her picture and he thought she was so beautiful he was afraid she would never want to be with an ordinary man like him. That made her smile. It was a small one, but definitely a smile.

It had taken a lot of preparation, but the rest of my plan unfolded perfectly. I made arrangements to take Fred to the club on a night Esta was dancing. He'd never gone to a strip club before; I thought that was a bit odd for a veteran, but it fit with everything else I knew about Fred. He looked pretty nervous, so I encouraged him to have a couple of beers.

Mary danced before it was time for Esta's set. "That is a very beautiful woman," Fred said.

"I agree," I said. "Fred, you need to know something. That woman is not named Red. Her name is actually Mary, and she's my girlfriend."

Fred's eyes got wide again. "How did you manage that?"

I smiled. "Mary claims I have a magic cock."

Fred laughed. "Yeah. Right. Me too."

"I'm telling you this because Mary and I love each other, but we have an open relationship. We sometimes have intimate relationships with other people, but we are committed to each other. I go to bed next to Mary every night, and I wake up next to her every morning."

"So far, this sounds like something you'd read in a men's magazine. Or a website devoted to amateur erotica."

"My life is not that interesting," I lied. "I'm telling you this because I've been in a relationship with Esta for a while. I care about her, and she cares about me. She's been wonderful to me, but the fact is that she's not really comfortable being involved with a man in an open relationship. She and Mary are friends, for God's sake. Everyone gets along fine, but I'm smart enough to recognize that Esta has needs I can never meet. At some point, I have to let her go."

"And you think she's at that point?" Fred asked.

"I do," I said. "Just know that if you two hit it off, I will not stand in your way. Esta deserves to be happy. That's another thing you two have in common."

In one of those happy coincidences, the DJ chose that exact time to introduce Esta. "Back by popular demand, I present the unofficial Queen of Moldova. Give some applause to the magnificent Esmerelda!"

I'd used the sonic stimulator to prepare Fred to view Esta as very beautiful when he finally saw her. Naturally, that's exactly what happened.

"She's the most magnificent woman here!" Fred said. "She's perfect! Absolutely perfect! I've never seen a woman as stunning as that!"

Am I good, or what?

You can imagine what happened next. I introduced them, and there were so many sparks, it's a miracle they didn't burn the club down. Every time I looked their way, they seemed to be having a staring contest. They left together. I don't know if they spent that first night together, but they probably did.

Esta and I had one more romantic afternoon together. She confessed that she loved Fred, and she thought it was strange being in love with two men at the same time.

"Esta, that's a perfectly normal thing. You know how much I love you and Mary. Love isn't something that's limited. It doesn't need to be rationed. The more love you make, the more you have."

At some point I lost track of Esta. She vacated her condo so she could move into Fred's place. They got married in Las Vegas. Esta arranged to meet me and break the news that we couldn't see each other anymore because she wanted to be Fred's woman exclusively.

"Esta, I am so happy for you," I said. "I'm sad for me, because I'll miss you, but you deserve more than I give you. You deserve to be with Fred."

I didn't notice immediately when Esta stopped dancing at the club. When I finally asked Mary, she said it had been several weeks. Apparently Esta decided she'd rather focus on being a wife than earn the salary that came with being a dancer.

Months went by. I was shopping for light bulbs one afternoon when I spotted Fred and Esta shopping for a baby bed. Esta looked so pregnant I wondered if she'd gone into labor and decided to do a little shopping on her way to the maternity ward. I stood back from them for a long time, just watching. It made me feel indescribably happy. Fred had his arm around Esta's shoulders, and she was smiling. It was a big smile. Unlike anything I'd seen on her face before. I felt very proud. I'd done a good thing, two people were very happy, and a third was on the way.

"Well, hello there!" I said. "It's two of my favorite people! I'd ask what's new, but I think I already know the answer. When are you due?"

"Next month," Fred said. He had a big smile too, but that wasn't terribly surprising because Fred smiled a lot. What was surprising was the width of Esta's smile. I hadn't thought the muscles of her face stretched that far.

We had a nice little conversation, then I left them to do their work comparison shopping for baby furniture. I bought my replacement light bulbs and went home. I remember thinking something new when I drove into the parking garage. Something significant.

I had become a different person.

It had happened so slowly that I hadn't even noticed, but so many things about me had changed it was impossible to ignore. My way of looking at the world had changed. My way of looking at other people had changed. My image of myself had changed. Almost everything had changed.