Vanessa The Undresser Ch 04

Welcome to the fourth chapter in the saga of Vanessa aka Libby. With Vanessa in her past, can Libby reinvent herself? Various analytical assassins have looked over this and offered advice and suggestions and I am grateful for their assistance. They know who they are :)

~*~*~*~*~

After graduation, I scored a position as a first-grade teacher between the city and the town where the McDonalds lived. I argued to myself that Garry and Cindy were half an hour down the road and unlikely to bump into me. Cindy had never returned to college after her mother's death, dropping out of her degree.

As a result of that disastrous buck's night , I sought out a counsellor who I unloaded on about Cindy and Garry and my life as Vanessa the Undresser. It was cathartic and it made me realise that I was worthy of being cherished and loved, even if I did not overly love and cherish myself. For a few months, I saw Darryl, a guy I studied with.

Darryl had a great cock, but things were just nice. I never told him about Vanessa. He'd had a couple of girlfriends, but was not that adventurous in bed. We'd talk about our studies and help each other with assignments, but the whole relationship lacked something. Yes, I felt cherished and wanted, but there was little passion evident in our relationship.

I don't think Darryl knew any better. I never met his parents and he described them as honest, hardworking folk who lived a comfortable life. He didn't like the same music as I did and, although he tried to get into some heavy metal, it really wasn't him.

Darryl ended up getting a job on the other side of the state and, although he pleaded with me to move with him, I was not overly sad to see him go.

The school community embraced me as Miss Cartwright. One of the reasons I had wanted to head away from the city was I was concerned I might bump into some former clients. When I stopped being Vanessa, I also changed my appearance, cutting my hair into a pixie cut and bleaching it.

I felt totally justified in wanting to pursue teaching and loved the work. It was hard, but I had a lovely class and friendly and helpful colleagues. It was a rural area and there was an amazing spirit at the school which was a focal point in the town. I knew if I was going to succeed I would need to get involved in town activities so I joined a local book club. Although some of the locals reminded me of Aunt Catherine and my parents, there were many who never sought to get into the business of others.

If people asked how I supported myself through uni, I told them I danced or that I worked in a hotel. Both were sort of true. I was always concerned that my past might catch up with me, and, although I sensed a past as a stripper would not be as heinous as a past as a prostitute, I was keen to ensure my past in no way met my present.

At the end of the first term, we had parent-teacher interviews. Most of the children in my class were amazing, but little Connor was a handful. Connor's parents were the last on my list to see for the evening and, although I had been apprehensive before the interviews, they had gone so well, with the parents gushing over how much their children loved me.

One or two of the mothers were in my book club, and one of the single fathers and I laughed when he told me that his daughter kept telling him that I didn't have a boyfriend, not knowing that her father was indeed seeing someone. I knew I would never hook up with a parent of one of my students, and had heard horror stories of colleagues forming relationships that soured and influenced the atmosphere of the entire school community.

"Mr and Mrs Bagshaw? Hi, I'm Libby Cartwright, Connor's teacher, please come in." Mr Bagshaw turned around and I tried to stifle a gasp. It was Phil from the buck's night.

"Libby, I'm Marci, and this is Paul."

"Phil, was it?" I asked, shocked.

"No, Paul," He replied as he stuck out his hand, "Hey, don't I know you from somewhere?"

"I'm not sure. I only moved here at the start of the year."

"No, I know I've met you and I never forget a pretty face!"

"Did you work when you were at uni?" Marci was now becoming inquisitive.

"Yes, I worked at a hotel in the city," I said with a straight face, hoping Phil or Paul or whatever he was calling himself might remember. "The Four Seasons."

"That was where you went for that disastrous buck's night for Brad, wasn't it, honey?" Phil looked at his wife then at me and realised where he knew me from, "Libby, Poor Paul was a groomsman for his best mate, Brad. Now Brad was going to marry Trina who I work with, but one of the other groomsmen organised a prostitute! I mean, I know he was single, but Paul and Jake weren't."

I was intrigued to hear Marci's side of the story.

"Well, fortunately, Paul refused to have anything to do with it and fell asleep on the couch, but apparently Jake had his way with this hooker all night and she then seduced Brad who confessed to Trina who called off the wedding. Poor Trina's still a mess and Paul hasn't talked with the other guys since soon after that. I'm surprised Jake's wife forgave him, she's the type who I thought would have cut his balls off!"

"Well, we're here for Connor tonight," I offered, "He seems to be having a few issues settling in class at times. Are things ok at home?"

"Of course they are!" Paul shouted looking at me as if I had accused him of cheating. "My family is everything to me."

"It's ok, love, we know how much you adore us. Connor's an only child. I can't have any more children, and Paul is up in town a lot for work. He's away from home a few nights per week. Connor doesn't like his dad being away, but Paul needs to go where the work is and I like being down here closer to my family."

I wanted to shout at Marci and tell her to open her eyes, but I also recognised this was not my place. After they left, I noticed Paul had left his phone behind. He came to collect it and thanked me for not outing him. Reminding him that Connor was the one being hurt the most in all of this as he obviously sensed something was not right, I hoped he might reflect on his cheating behaviour.

It reminded me of Garry. I had not thought about him for a while and wondered how he and Cindy were doing. I had several new acquaintances at school, but I did not believe I had any firm friends, not friends in the way Cindy and I were. I missed this but also feared opening myself up to friendship, despite the counselling I had received. I thought about how different Garry and Paul were. Garry was willing to live in a loveless and unsatisfying marriage whereas Paul tried to have the best of both worlds having a family he cheated on throughout the week.

~*~*~*~*~

"Libby, there's a local metal band playing at the Crown Hotel tonight, want to go?" Julie, a colleague who had bonded over our joint appreciation of the finer art of heavy metal, asked me as we walked to our cars after work one Friday.

"That sounds like lots of fun! It's been ages since I've been out."

We agreed that Julie and her partner, would pick me up on the way. I took a shower, threw on some jeans and a t-shirt, messed up my hair and put on much more makeup than I would usually wear at work.

It was a fun night and the three of us danced through the first set. It was the first time I missed not having long hair I could bang about to the beat. During the break, I headed to the bathroom and was shocked as I exited my cubicle to see Cindy touching up her lipstick.

"Fuck! I'd recognise those tits anywhere!" Cindy cried.

"Hi. Um, sorry, I didn't know you'd be here. I'll go," I offered.

"Wait, Libby." Cindy had caught up with me in the hallway, "Please, um, I'm so sorry. I treated you like absolute shit, and I've been too scared to contact you to apologise. Can we grab a drink or something?"

We made our way to the beer garden and although I could hear the band from inside, I was more excited to be catching up with my long-lost friend.

"So, I dropped out of uni, but you knew that I suppose. I got a job back home in a pub and lived in a room above the bar. I was close enough to Dad to make sure he was doing ok, but things were still tense for a year or so."

"I'm so sorry about it all. I honestly didn't know he was your Dad until after we had had sex. It just happened so fast."

"Yeah. I get that now. Uncle Malcolm's wife, Robyn, convinced me to see someone to work through my anger."

"Did it help?"

"Yeah. The shrink, well, they're just a psychologist or something, but I call her my shrink, she keeps telling me to apologise to you, but I didn't know how. I acted like such a fucking cow. I recognise now I was projecting onto you."

"Shit, you've become all enlightened, haven't you!"

"Yeah. At the time I thought you were turning into my mother, getting knocked up at uni and living a miserable life in the country. I know I was wrong. What about you?" Cindy laughed.

"I did my education degree and got a job here. I didn't want to work in the city in case I came across a former client, and then, last week, at my first parent-teacher interviews, I met a dad who cheated on his wife with me. It was fucked up. I was fucked up. I mean, your dad didn't help things sometimes— he was rather direct at times with what he wanted, like a baby and everything. I was never going to go through with a pregnancy at uni -- I would have had a termination if I needed to you know. Has he met someone, your dad? Did you get your wicked stepmother?"

"No!" Libby laughed again, "He's also been in therapy. It's his story to tell, but I'm sure he'd like to share it with you."

"And you'd be ok with us catching up, not like hooking up or anything?"

"Yes, I'd even be ok with you hooking up, I mean, I get what a major catch he is and perhaps, some cis women might find him attractive."

"I'm not sure..."

"That shy, defensive Libby is still there, I see!"

"I think I've changed. You two aren't the only ones to have seen someone. Apparently, I'm deserving of being loved and cherished, even by myself, who would have thunk it!"

"We have lunch with Dad on Sundays at the farm. Want to join us this weekend?"

"Um, perhaps not this weekend, it's all happening so fast. We?"

"My girlfriend, Caz, is playing bass in the band so I took a night off to come and support her and now I'm out here with you. Lucky she's not the jealous type!"

"Are you happy?"

"Yeah, I am. I didn't make mum kill herself. I never knew Dad suggested at the time she terminate the pregnancy; we've worked through that though. Are you free tomorrow? How about you, me and Caz go for a bushwalk? You still like hiking I assume?"

"Yeah, I do, but I never knew you did!"

"You need to meet Caz, she's pretty amazing. She's introduced me to lots of things. Have you done McDonald's Falls walk?"

"Is it named after you?"

"Nah, after my great-great-someone or other. Dad's petitioning to have it renamed Wulla Wulla Falls after the traditional owners of the land."

"Yeah, I'd like that a lot really."

"Who's this stealing my girlfriend from me?" A woman with spiked black hair and piercings all around her face came up and kissed Cindy.

"Caz, you'll never guess, but this is Libby! She's been living down here for a few months."

"Not

the

Libby? Libby, Libby? Vanessa the Undresser, Libby?"

"Yeah, that's me, although Vanessa has not been out to play for well over a year. I think that's behind me now."

"Garry'll be devo!" Caz laughed, her arms around Cindy's shoulders

"So, Cind has talked about me then?"

"Shit yeah!"

"Dollar, Caz!"

"Yeah, we have a swear jar now. Saving to head north. Cindy's going to study marine biology."

"What happened to environmental science?"

"You know I hated that. I need a purpose and Caz's bandmates are heading north so I figured why not!"

"What does your dad think?

I saw Caz and Cindy look at each other.

"He doesn't know."

~*~*~*~*~

I had an amazing day hiking with Cindy and Caz. Apart from the amazing scenery, we spotted several koalas, an echidna and two wombats. I had been concerned I might be a third wheel for the couple, but they were eager to hear all about my past few years and Cindy told me plenty about what had happened with her.

Cindy and Caz were deeply in love. They often finished each other's sentences and often stole touches, glances and kisses throughout the hike. I witnessed a form of intimacy I had never known. My parents had never been intimate in front of me or in public, apart from my father kissing my mother on the cheek when he left the house in the morning.

"You're still welcome to join us tomorrow for a meal with Dad," Cindy offered as we arrived back at our cars.

"Thanks, but..."

"Honestly, he'd love to see you, Libbs."

"Perhaps next weekend, I've really got a lot of work to do for school this week," I lied.

"It's the last week before the holidays, isn't it? Won't you just be watching movies and shit?"

"Swear jar!" Caz interjected, "Hey, if Libby isn't ready, then leave her. Garry can wait!"

This was the second time Caz had hinted at Garry wanting to see me. I felt torn, knowing I had enjoyed an amazing night with him, but also wondering if we were still at different places in our lives.

"How about next weekend? I've got no plans for Easter and it's the holidays and all." I suggested.

"Yes! Come on Sunday. We're having a huge lunch with Uncle Malcolm and Auntie Robyn and their sons— Dad even said he'd arrange an Easter Egg hunt!"

"I'll bring dessert then— perhaps a pavlova?"

The final week of the school term went smoothly. It was a short week, and the children were still excited about Easter and the possibility of lots of chocolate. I was relieved that they would have two weeks to get over their sugar highs from all the eggs, but I also recognised I'd miss them.

Some colleagues had suggested I head farther down the coast with them as they camped for a few days, but I had declined their offer. I knew people were trying to get to know me, but it still felt hard opening up to others.

My once-weekly phone calls with my parents now stretched to monthly calls and I had all but lost touch with my brothers. I recognised I was alone, but I did not feel lonely despite wishing I had a friend. I was glad I'd made contact with Cindy again, but it was still early days and she had Caz now and perhaps wouldn't need or want me around as much.

Cindy had messaged me daily since we reconnected and was often sending me silly memes and was happy I was sending her examples of the latest music I was listening to. I suspected Caz had introduced her to a much wider repertoire of metal, but Cindy never complained and would listen to the track or album I sent through and comment, often with another meme.

She never mentioned her father, but I knew with Cindy back in my life, and living so close to him, I would need to see Garry. I hoped that he would recognise me as Libby and not Vanessa, and that I could perhaps get to know him a little. CIndy had always raved about his quick wit and his outgoing personality that saw him liked by almost everyone he met. Charming was the word she most often used, and often referred to him as a dirty-old-man as he was open about his fascination with women's bodies.

Although I did not want Garry to see me as Vanessa, at the same time I was intrigued to see if there was more to him than the creepy guy I had spent a night with. Although my first impression had been promising, seeing him as this sexy older guy, his conversations during sex ended up souring the experience. Even though Cindy had changed, I recognised I was not prepared to simply run and jump into Garry's arms.

I had spent a long time putting Vanessa behind me. I had discovered through therapy that she had some of the traits that I did as Libby in that we were both searching for love and acceptance after I never felt I received this from my parents.

Slicing the fruit for the pavlova I had promised to bring, I convinced myself that lunch was going to be pleasant, but I would be on the lookout for the first sign of creepiness and be prepared to remain friends with Cindy, even if it meant very rare contact with her father.

~*~*~*~*~

As I drove towards the McDonald's property I felt my hands gripping the steering wheel much more firmly than usual. I tried some of the breathing exercises I had practised with my therapist and recognised I was simply meeting with friends for lunch. I hardly knew Malcolm and Robyn, apart from the few minutes I had spent with them the night Babs had died, but Malcolm had reminded me of a giant teddy bear and, although he knew about Garry and Vanessa, I also recognised I was no longer Vanessa.

It was different arriving at the McDonald's homestead in daylight. The leaves on the trees that lined the drives had all turned a beautiful patchwork of rusts, yellows and oranges and often some floated from the canopies towards the ground. The garden surrounding the house looked a little overgrown, but it still contained pops of colour, and some bees were hovering around the lavender and rosemary bushes.

"She's here!" I heard Cindy scream as I closed my car door and stopped to smell an almost wilted rose.

"You found us ok then? Here, Caz, take the pav and chuck it in the fridge would you?"

"Perhaps don't chuck it, Caz, it looks amazing!" Garry had appeared through the squeaky flywire door. "Hey Libby, it's lovely to see you again— your hair looks incredible!"

"Um, hi," I leant in for a very platonic hug and a kiss on the cheek, "Thanks for having me. I, um, also brought a bottle of wine and some soft drink for the kids."

Cindy linked her arm in mine as we walked inside again telling me how wonderful it was that I was there. It reminded me of the first year at college when we were in lockdown and Cindy and I would walk arm in arm around the quadrangle laughing and just talking about nothing in particular.

The lounge room had been repainted. Gone were the pastel hues that had once adorned the walls, now replaced with a pale cream that made the room appear larger.

"Libby, you remember Malcolm and Robyn? And these are their sons Batman and Superman."

"No, I'm Spiderman!" the younger of the two screamed as he ran from the room and out the door with an ageing Sid, throwing the ball for the dog which was obediently fetched.

"Sorry, Libby, that's Angus and he's a bit of a handful at times. He loves coming out here and running around though and this is Will. Will, can you put your book down for a few minutes?"

"Hi Will, I'm Libby. Is that Captain Underpants? I love those books!"

Will appeared extremely sweet, slightly older than the children I taught, with new teeth that were almost too big for his mouth.

Amazing smells were coming from the kitchen and Garry appeared to be in total control of the food. We sat at the long dining table with Angus insisting he sit next to me. He refused to let his parents help with his food, so I cut some of the roast lamb into smaller pieces for him.

"So, where's your girlfriend?" Angus asked as he scooped more potatoes into his mouth.

"I don't have a girlfriend or a boyfriend," I answered in my most matter-of-fact tone.

"You can be Uncle Garry's girlfriend because he doesn't have a boyfriend or a girlfriend either."

Robyn tried to hush her son and apologised for his behaviour, but I assured them it was fine, and I was used to answering questions from six-year-olds daily.

Angus proudly told me he was five and continued to make conversation with me. It was a nice distraction from Garry and made Cindy and Caz both laugh.

After lunch, Cindy, Caz and I offered to do the dishes as the other adults kept Angus entertained. Garry had promised to saddle up one of the horses for him to ride.