This Was Only the First Time

She couldn't believe that they fired him, he was the manager, he had always been here. For the last 7 months he had been her rock, after a couple years of absolute hell, other than her friend Mary, he was the only person who made a point of asking how she was and genuinely helping her.

How could they fire him?

She knew most of the staff respected him and was loyal to him and not necessarily to the new owners. She had heard some staff grumbling that he was too tough, and that his expectations were too high; but no one she had ever met worked harder than him. She also knew he had only ever been helpful and sincere to her anytime that she had ever spoken to him and that had been a lot.

A few weeks ago, in the lunchroom she had overheard one of the owners actually talking to some of the other associates trying to take things out of context and make it appear that he had done something wrong when he hadn't. Why did she not say something, why did she not defend him; she knew why, she needed the job, this job was a big chance for her.

When she spoke to her friend, Mary, about this, she asked, "What should I do, they are trying to frame him and are making up stories."

Mary said, "He knows, it isn't the first time, they have been gunning for him for more than a year."

"Why does he stay?" She asked.

"He thinks he can win, despite all of the obstacles they have put in his place, he manages to find ways to keep us successful, but there isn't anything you can do," she said sadly. "One of these days, when they think they can unload him, they will."

Less than two weeks later, they did pull the trigger. And just like that he was gone.

She never realized just how many questions or problems he helped her solve each day until she found herself starting to go to his now empty office with a problem. She missed his friendly smile and "good mornings." She missed knowing that he always had time for her, and she had noticed he always made time for any one else that came to his office with a problem.

It was funny, while he was there, she almost took his presence for granted, he was like her own personal "google."

There were small things too she had only started to notice about him: his calmness that he seemed to radiate no matter what chaos was happening; the quietness and strength of his voice; the way he carried himself, he was a powerful man, but he didn't flaunt it like some of the twenty-something salesmen did; he had a nice smile, which she didn't see often enough; she loved his scent, it was a mix of how he made her feel that she couldn't quite describe in words and old spice, a scent that made her feel secure and confident. And one day she had noticed he had stopped wearing his wedding ring, but did not really think about that until he was gone.

There had been gossip about that too, Mary had said "it happens, people change, his wife is very nice, but wants different things than him, I know he was seeing a counsellor, but that's all." Later she found out they had separated.

He had never made any suggestions that he was interested in her, although several times she had noticed him discretely looking at her and smiling. During her training, several times she had been very close to him and she had felt a certain amount of connection to him, but he didn't act on them. The logical side of her brain said, "It was nothing, he was just a good trainer, he helped you through some rough times, getting involved with an older man, especially someone who was married, was just a bad idea in a string of her bad ideas. But now that he was gone, she began to realize that his feelings may have gone beyond him just being helpful.

He hadn't done anything except treat her well, he had listened, he had asked if she wanted advice, he waited until she answered and when the answer was yes, and his advice was really good. He also had a way, she now realized, of making her feel stronger and more confident without asking anything in return.

The day after he was gone, she found out how old he was. She couldn't believe that he was 54, he was 4 years older than her father. Sure, he had some grey hair and was balding, but she knew he was in better shape than guys half his age, she had thought he was maybe 40 or even 45. One day he had come into the store wearing shorts, a t-shirt, and a ball cap and she didn't even recognize him. He had broad shoulders, a small waist, and he moved with a certain confidence that was hard to describe; reflecting on that, why didn't she realize what an attractive man he was?

Maybe that's what made him so attractive, he didn't try to impress anyone, he just was himself.

Mary said that he worked out and ran, she thought to herself, "That would explain his nice ass," she didn't say that out loud though. She noticed Mary kind of smiling when she described him. So maybe she had noticed it too.

Her thoughts of him lingered and she couldn't help wondering perhaps if she had let an opportunity slip away.

Since her divorce she hadn't even noticed very many men. She had gotten married to her high school sweet heart, he was going to be a lawyer. In school he had been the "star" and she had been the "quiet" pretty girl next door and they had dated since they were in middle school.

After graduation they had moved to the city against the wishes of her parents; she worked two jobs so Rob could go to school; which was really against the wishes of her parents, and she was in love. Once Rob graduated, she would go to college. That was the plan and it had been tough, but they managed and she was committed to Rob.

One year became two, two became four and graduation was approaching, and Rob was excelling at school. He said that he had a chance to be the valedictorian and as a result more of his time was being spent on projects and working in groups late after class.

She hadn't suspected a thing, the late-night study sessions, excuses about the booze on his breath. One night she swore she could smell perfume on his clothes. Their sex-life which had been incredible at the start, slowly declined to eventually become non-existent. She had thought something was wrong with her.

One night she came home from a double shift and found the note, he was gone. Most of the furniture was gone, all of the money was gone, he was sorry but he had met someone, another soon to be lawyer.

The next several months were a blur. She kept working both jobs for a while, but her heart wasn't in it. She let her appearance suffer, she got fired and just didn't care. A few guys dated her, but they really only wanted sex and after letting herself go, even they stopped asking. She existed, but not like before, her life was shattered, and she allowed the downward spiral to continue.

Their apartment was too much and she was evicted, she found a smaller place that was really horrible and existed there, bouncing from one crappy job to the next. Her family with their strict religious views hadn't wanted her to live with her boyfriend, now saw this as her punishment and essentially said, "You made your bed now lie in it." They called it tough love, but she didn't see it that way.

Almost a year had passed and it wasn't until an old high school friend, Mary, had noticed how far she had fallen that she got some help. Slowly with Mary's help, she had realized that life hadn't ended when Rob left, she was still only 25, what had seemed like the end of her world, really wasn't.

Mary had helped get her this job and she was doing well enough but her confidence was still shattered and she was broken in a lot of places. Mary had tried to get the family to help, but they had been using her as an example to her siblings, who were all "good" kids and none of them were interested in helping her or getting compared to her.

Michelle hadn't told anyone about the first time he had stopped and talked to him, except Mary.

One nigh, right after she had first started, she had thought she was alone and had been crying in the lunchroom because she didn't think she could handle the new job. He had invited her into his office, they had talked, he had given her some tissue, and he listened. At the time, Mary said to be careful because he was older than her father although she really didn't know how old, and he was married, albeit unhappily.

She had told Mary not to worry at the time, that she was totally right about him, she told herself there was no connection, but looking back she should have been able to see the signs.

She liked that he didn't judge her, he just listened, like most of his actions, it wasn't until later that she really appreciated his concern for her. That night the store had been closed and they stayed and talked for almost two hours. For the first time she let all of the emotion out, to a total stranger.

He had offered to help, if she wanted, and from the night onward, whenever she was stuck, she came and talked to him, he would encourage her, question her about what she thought she should do, he would empower her to make decisions, and he said that he had faith in her. Most importantly, he told her that she deserved to be happy.

Over the weeks and months, she began to get better and better. Mary helped as much as she could, but looking back now, she realized it was his support that really helped make her better. As more time past, there didn't seem to be any detail too small for him to help her. A month after that conversation, she decided she wanted to get back into shape and taking better care of herself.

She quit smoking, which she had started when Rob left. At first the yoga and exercise didn't seem to be helping, but he was there when she wanted to quit and talked her into staying with it. He had suggested that she go running with him.

She was kind of nervous the first time and worried about the gossip if someone saw them running together. He was never concerned, he didn't care about gossip, he said that they were just exercising and talking, it was therapy.

He always ran a step or two behind her, he said that he liked watching her pony tail bounce from the running. She found herself smiling more often and feeling so much better about herself. They would run about 4-5 miles at least twice a week.

Sometimes she couldn't help but notice the bulge in his shorts, the tanned muscular legs and his very tight ass.

After a few months of working out and running, she looked better than her old self, but there was something missing.

Just about a week or so ago, Mary asked about dating again, and asked her if there was anyone, she was interested in. At the time, maybe because she couldn't see what was right in front of her, she never considered him nor really anyone else, but Mary suggested a guy one of her other friends had recommended, Mike.

Mike was handsome, very nice, and Mary set them up. They would go to dinner and a movie. She was excited, she loved movies and at the time the thought of someone being interested in her as a woman was a major step for her.

She remembered telling him about her upcoming date with Mike, she didn't recognize the look of disappointment that flickered in his eyes. He seemed happy for her, but now that she thought about it, she should have recognized it for what is was.

Mary helped her get ready and suggested she wear a very sexy torn set of faded blue jeans, that hugged her newly restored ass like a second skin. Mary could see her pantie lines and insisted that she go commando and after some convincing she agreed. She couldn't help but feel sexy as the crotch of the jeans pulled tightly against her pussy. She wore a black tank top without a bra; again because of Mary, leaving her perky 34b's feeling very sexy rubbing against the sheer material. Mary did her makeup and gave her a necklace to wear. She wasn't sure about the outfit, but she had to agree with Mary that she looked nice.

Mike was 15 minutes late picking her up and it went downhill from there. The meal was fine, but all Mike talked about was himself, not a single question about her, she wondered then if that was when she started making comparisons of Mike to him. Every conversation with him, began with questions about how she was, about how nice she looked, about the clothes that she wore, about the special necklaces that she liked. Mike did not do any of that.

During the movie, it was like Mike had a dozen hands. She used to like getting physical and she had been looking forward to some physical contact with a man, maybe even sex with Mike, but she had hoped they would build towards it, that's not what happened. As soon as the lights went down, Mike's hands went to work.

He roughly cupped her breasts several times; and without warning felt her up, with his fingers between her legs, she felt violated not turned on, and each time she made him stop, he tried to tell her that he was sorry and for her just to give him another chance, and then 5 minutes later he would be doing it again.

Finally, she got up and left, Mike swore at her as she left saying that "you are such a tease, dressing like that, like some kind of a slut, what did you expect," she managed not to cry as she left the movie theatre.

She needed a ride, Mary did not answer when she called and had to leave a message, she was miles from home and there were no buses. Now she did start to cry, she was finally starting to feel good about herself and then the first guy she tries to date thinks she is a tease and some kind of slut.

She couldn't think of anyone to call and then she remembered him. He had texted her once or twice and she was sure she had his phone number.

She took a chance and called him.

"Hi, it's Michelle, I need a huge favour, can you help," she asked in a voice that sounded smaller than what she wanted to project.

"Are you okay? Where are you?" she could hear the concern in his voice.

"Outside the movies, can you come and give me a ride?" she started to cry again.

"I'm on my way," came the response in that quiet, calm voice.

About 10 incredibly long minutes later, he arrived to pick her up, he had a ball cap on, an old t-shirt, black shorts, and running shoes. He almost looked unrecognizable and easily 10-15 years younger than he normally did.

When she saw him, she ran to him and without thinking about it, she hugged him. For the first time she had those strong arms around her, she buried her head in his chest, feeling that attraction again and almost being intoxicated by his scent. He stroked her hair and told her that she is okay now. She could have stayed there in his arms forever.

She held his hand as he took her to his car and he held the door for her. They sat in the dark, parked as she told him everything that had happened. He listened and listened until she stopped crying, only then did he start the car up to take her home.

As they drove, he told her that she looked beautiful and she wasn't a tease, he told her that Mike was an asshole and that she deserved someone who loved and respected her, someone who would take her breath away and make her feel safe at the same time. He said that there were many good men out there and that she would find the right one for her.

As he talked, she began to realize how right he was and just how close she actually was to a person that fit all of those requirements ... and he was less than two feet away from her.

He told her when he dropped her off that if she needed anything, just to call anytime. He walked her to the door and hugged her again. She held onto him perhaps a little longer than what might have seemed appropriate, given that he was her boss. Taking a chance just before letting go, she leaned towards him and kissed him on the lips.

For such a short kiss, their connection made her see stars. His lips were warm and gentle, they touched hers with almost a visible spark as he kissed her back. Another person approached the building she broke the kiss, he smiled and squeezed her again and then turned to go. She watched him walk back to his car and leave; really noticing what a real man that he was.

Back in her apartment, she realized with a shock how wet her pussy was, a darkened moist spot about 2 to 3 inches circled her crotch and her nipples were painfully erect. The realization and the kiss made her sit down on her bed, she had not been looking for this.

Almost like she was watching some else lying on her bed, she felt her fingers rubbing her breasts through the silky fabric of her tank top, the already hard nipples responding to her touch with incredible sensitivity, he breath already ragged. Pausing for a second, she unbuttoned her jeans and slid them down her thighs, wearing only the tank top, one hand worked her pussy and the other focused on her breasts. Re-imagining the kiss, it only took her seconds to come, and really experience her first orgasm in longer than she could remember.

"Wow," she smiled, she couldn't wait to see him tomorrow.

Then the next day he was fired.

When she read the company email that was coldly sent out saying that he was gone she had almost cried and wanted to go home sick.

She told herself that she was being silly, she knew he was more than twice her age, and he was older than his father, what would her friends and co-workers think, was he only wanting to be a friend and support, did her think of her as a child or as a woman. Then she thought about the kiss, in all the time she had been with Rob, he had never kissed her like that, the strength and tenderness at the same time made her feel lightheaded and very desirable.

That first morning, one of the small things she immediately missed were the small daily quotes that he sent out each morning. He had said that each one was different and they were always for one person in particular, but he would never say who. She had laughed because it wasn't uncommon for several people to tell her that they thought today's quote was about them on the same day.

She had a feeling though, many of them were for her. Or at least she hoped they were, because many of them touched her heart.

Taking a chance that first night, she typed in a message and immediately deleted it; and did the same thing five times before finally taking the plunge with, "I really miss you and the way you made me feel strong."

She waited, 5 minutes, 30 minutes, an hour and then discouraged she went to sleep doubting herself and despite herself feeling abandoned again. The despair that had haunted her before, now came back with a vengeance. She cried quietly and felt completely alone, she knew it was silly, but that's how she felt. She was stronger now, but still vulnerable, and she wanted that feeling of connection more than anything she had ever wanted in her life.

In the middle of the night, she had gotten up to go to the washroom and happened to look at her phone.

"You are never alone."

She had to read it twice, her despair which had been so deep and all encompassing lifted from her chest.

The message meant more to her at that moment than any other message that she had ever received. She smiled when her head it the pillow and she slept soundly until the alarm woke her up.

Afraid it was a dream when she awoke, she grabbed her phone, a new message was there telling her how strong he thought she was and that any time she needed to talk, he would be there for her.

It was funny she thought, it had started with him just being a person that she talked to each day, she had never thought of him at the beginning. He wasn't the first person you noticed when you walked into a room, yes, he was attractive, but it was a quiet attractiveness. He was solid, you could count on him, he wasn't flashy, she thought a couple of years ago, she wouldn't have even likely noticed him. Not now, when she closed her eyes, he was what she saw, and she felt his scent as she thought about his embrace.