Lately when it comes to this whole Internet dating thing, and camming and chatting on Yahoo, I find myself having a very difficult time trying to be my usual, easy-going, happy-go-lucky, cheerful, old self. These days, it seems to me that no matter how hard I try not to expect things of people anymore -- particularly when it comes to my guys -- I still wind up somehow always feeling disappointed and let down. I guess one reason for that is because, try as I might, I still DO expect certain things from certain people -- especially when it comes to the things that seem to me, should be such simple things to expect of just about anybody -- anybody who professes to care about me, that is.
For example, when someone makes a date with me, I expect him to keep it. That is largely because when I make a date to do something with someone -- come hell or high water, I keep it! Doing otherwise only shows that you lack respect for other people's time, and hence their feelings. Not to mention that habitually breaking dates just makes you look like a liar! And too look like a liar is never a good thing, no matter which way you are looking at it! lol
Why is it then that no matter how many dates I make with my guys -- and as a matter of fact, no matter how few -- not one single guy -- I repeat -- not a one -- ever does follow through and keep the date that he has taken my time to make with me?! And why is it that -- after three years of this Internet dating that I have supposedly been having such a rip-roaring, grand old time doing -- here I still sit in front of my lonely computer keyboard and screen complaining about the same old goddam fucking thing I was complaining about three years ago when I first started this stuff?! Why is it that after making no less than -- oh-let's-pick-a-nice-round-number-like-say 200 dates with the many men I have met here online over the past three years -- why is it that 99.9% of the guys who made all those dates with me are now the same exact guys who are 100%, completely and totally responsible for leaving me feeling as low as I am right now, in this one, big, fat, ugly, sad, disgusted, disappointed lump?! lol Do I have the right to expect even that little of any supposedly MATURE YOUNGER MAN, and still wind up not getting dick from any body? And you can take that literally if you want to, too! Because when I say I am not getting DICK from any body, I mean I am not getting any cock at all -- as in NO SEX! Because guys are still standing me up or canceling out on and breaking every single goddam fucking date they ever make with me!
So... Am I disappointed in all of my guys out there? Those who profess to be so highly interested in getting to know me, so they can meet me in person, because supposedly I am so sexy and I seem to have a great knack for being able to turn guys on so much and make my guys all feel so highly sexually aroused by me, that they cannot wait to meet me and ultimately, hopefully, wind up having some wonderfully erotic and fantastically fabulous sex with me? Am I fed up with every last one, and totally disgusted with all of them, so much so, that I have now reached the point where I could care less if any one ever messages me anymore, to chat sexy chat with me, under the guise and outright LIE of wanting to make a real-time date with me, to come here to my apartment and meet me and have me, in the Biblical sense, that is -- IN THE FLESH? You bet I am!
And not only have my guys got me totally disgusted and disappointed in all of them, but they have also pissed me off to my limit of being pissed off, and they have done it so much, so that I no longer give a flying fuck about any of them. I really mean that, because they have all let me down so goddam badly that I have actually gone and lost my faith in the human race as a whole and in its entirety! lol hehehe
Yes, I am feeling that down and that rotten and that angry and that disappointed in all of them... All and each and every one... That is, EXCEPT for ONE and ONLY ONE! And that one and only guy who has not now and never has disappointed me -- not ever and not in any way -- is none other than, of course, who else could it be, but my handsome, sexy, affectionate, sexy, funny, sexy, intelligent (oh, and did I mention SEXY? hehehe) YOUNG RON!
Since the day I met him online here, now more than two whole years ago, Ron has never ever once come close to standing me up for a date that he made with me. And as far as canceling out on or breaking any, I can just barely now remember once a long time ago, when he felt guilty and sorry and horrible for having to tell me that he could not make it down here one weekend, because he was flat on his back, burning up in his bed with 102 fever from a case of pneumonia! He even felt so badly about breaking that date with me, that he made it up to me, by calling in sick to his work two days in a row the following week, just so he could come here and spend the whole morning, afternoon and evening with me, making mad, passionate love to me just about the entire time he was here -- except for the few minutes that we stopped to eat dinner, and then again for a few minutes more, when it was I who fell asleep in a nap on my sofa, because I was so totally exhausted from his sweet and perfect pounding of my pussy so wonderfully and lovingly the whole day long! lol hehehe
