Constance Sutton is a near neighbour of mine, living a just few doors away and around a corner, but up until my wife left me, running off with great originality with a pizza delivery guy, I'd hardly been aware of her existence and I don't think I'd ever spoken to her once. But then as she was a widow who was knocking on a bit and I was a married man in his twenties that's not really surprising, because we certainly didn't move in the same circles. Not only that, but she was wealthy and I was broke, very broke. I'd taken so much time off work since my wife had gone that my employer had decided to make my absence official and permanent.
But then one afternoon when I was mooching around, wandering past her house with nothing to do except feel sorry for myself, she called me over and asked if I would give her a hand put some boxes into the loft. For a moment I hesitated, wondering if I could actually be bothered to do anything at all, let alone help some old dear tidy her house up.
'I've got some beer if you'd like one afterwards.' She tempted. 'You see, I'm not quite as nimble as I used to be.'
I could well believe she wasn't, looking at her, but it was the prospect of a free cold drink in the heat of summer swung it for me and I did a smart right wheel and set about my good deed of that day, that week even. It wasn't a big job, just half a dozen grocery boxes full of assorted junk that needed stacking in the loft, but the temperature in the roof space was close to cooking and I came down with a hefty shine of sweat on my skin, and that didn't happen very often.
'Good gracious me.' She said, looking astonished at my red face. 'You've really earned that beer, haven't you?'
I smiled to myself at her turn of phrase and followed her into the kitchen, sitting at the big old pine kitchen table and waiting respectfully for my reward. She passed me a towel to wipe the sweat off of my face and disappeared through another door to return a moment or two later with a bottle of beer and a glass.
'I won't join you, if you don't mind. I'm afraid I'm not much of a beer drinker, I only keep it for guests, and in any case I had tea a short while ago.'
I didn't mind, in fact the thought of her drinking beer seemed quietly absurd anyway. I levered the cap from the bottle with my teeth and poured the lovely amber liquid into the glass.
'Oh, I'm so sorry.' Her hand flew to her mouth. 'I completely forgot to bring the bottle opener.'
'It's no problem.' I assured her, taking a long swallow of beer. 'I'm used to doing it like that.'
'Oh, you young people.' She waved a dismissive hand in my direction and then, perhaps realising just how clichΓ©d that must have sounded, she burst out laughing at herself, a full blooded, unrestrained laugh that soon had me joining in. When the laughter died away we sat at opposite sides of the kitchen table, she watching me closely as I drank her beer and me studying her in return. It was the first time I'd really taken a look at her as a person, rather than as the elderly lady who lived in the big house around the corner.
The first thing I realised was that she wasn't quite as old as I'd first thought. Because of the old-fashioned and very conservative way she dressed and acted I'd mentally tagged her as somewhere in her seventies or even older, but now I was seeing her close up I could see that she was only mid, maybe late, sixties. She was around five six or so tall, but quite skinny with it, with a shrunken bust and the beginnings of a pot belly, both of which added to the impression of age, although for all that her face carried the remnants of great beauty. She must have been quite a looker in her day, but her day was well in the past now and drooping eyelids and deep lines around her mouth had wiped most of her good looks away. I suddenly realised that she'd had her heyday long before I was even born and before my folks had done more than begin to explore the possibilities. It seemed a shame really, but I suppose it comes to us all. She'd had her hair died blonde and permed within an inch of its life, or otherwise I guess it would have been grey. Slightly darker eyebrows over her clear hazel eyes suggested that it would once have been a kind of mid brown.
'Do you know?' She said suddenly. 'Talking with you makes a very pleasant change from always talking to other old women. This is the first time I've been alone in the company of a man since my husband died, and that's eleven years ago'
'Really?' I said, unsure how to reply to that and wondering if the fact that she obviously felt safe in my company was a compliment or an insult. 'I'm glad.'
I suddenly realised that my reply could have been interpreted as being glad her husband was dead. 'I mean I'm glad you like me being here.'
She laughed again, amused by my embarrassment. 'No need to explain, and I do like you being here.'
That seemed to open the flood gates and all of a sudden she was telling me about her life. At one point she stopped to fetch me another beer, but I think that was only to make sure I didn't run off before she'd finished, otherwise she just carried on, never really giving me the chance to even comment.
It seemed that she had been married to a wealthy and much older businessman who had been the head of his own company. That had meant that, although her life was materially very comfortable, his circle of friends had tended to be of his social standing rather than hers and mainly of his age group too, and so she had lost touch with her childhood friends. It also probably accounted for her very old-fashioned outlook. Now, because he was dead and most of her acquaintances had also either followed suit or become so aged as to be gaga, she had found herself very much on her own. There were maybe half a dozen people that she could count as friends, and they were all around her own age, give or take half a dozen years, and they tended to talk only about who'd died this week and who was likely to go next. She admitted that she had reached the point when the time for starting again and developing a new social circle was passed, but she felt that she was too young yet to just - in her words - curl up and wait for the reaper. She didn't say it, but she was clearly desperately lonely.
I felt sorry for her, but more than that I found myself actually liking the old bat, especially as she displayed a wry sense of humour. I found myself looking on her as a person and not just as a member of the alien species that anyone that much older than me had always seemed to be before. To my own surprise I found myself asking if she would mind if I called again another day for a chat.
'Of course not, I've already said I enjoy your company. But don't expect a beer every time.'
After that admonishment I hardly dare not call again, and so I found myself ringing her bell two or three times as week. And don't get me wrong, I did it willingly because I found I enjoyed her company too. She might have dressed and spoken as if she'd just escaped from the nineteen fifties, but she was actually quite modern in her outlook. To my surprise I found that she was more than comfortable with her computer and she knew her way around her smartphone better than I did mine. I had to do a rapid reappraisal of my assumptions about the older generation. Even so, I still wasn't ready for what she asked me one day about a month after I had first heaved her boxes into the loft. We were in her lounge drinking coffee when she shook off the preoccupied look she had been wearing and looked across as if having made a sudden decision.
'Scott.' She began. 'What do you know about Craigslist personals?'
The genuine answer was not a lot. I'd looked at them a couple of times out of curiosity, but I'd never used them and I hadn't had very good reports from the couple of people I knew who had. They seemed to be a kind of sexual shopping mall for the desperate.
'Why do you ask?' I countered, not quite sure if she knew just what it was.
'If I tell you, can you promise me that this conversation will stay between the two of us?' She asked.
'Of course.' I promised her, puzzled.
'It must, because I'd be so embarrassed if anybody ever knew.' She looked at me hard, and then continued. 'You know that I don't get out much, and so I don't have very many friends?'
It was mainly a rhetorical question, and so I just nodded.
She paused for what seemed like ages. 'The point is that I don't get the chance to meet many men who are... how can I put it... still in working order.'