New to this so please be gentle with me (not the first time I've said that) All constructive criticism will be taken on board. Thanks in advance
Part.1
Growing up and learning about love.
At school I was never one of the popular girls. I had friends and I wasn't a geek, but I wasn't one of the in crowd either. I was small and slim and I didn't have the boobs which seemed to have appeared on a lot of girls during the last year. At 15 I met my first boyfriend, Craig. He was a little bit taller than me, had long wavy hair, dark brown eyes and such a cute cheeky smile. He was similar to me really, not one of the tough lads at school but no pushover either. I thought he was lovely. He was well mannered and didn't seem to think with his dick like most lads that age..
He would walk me home from school, we would hold hands and he would give me a little peck on the lips, all very innocent. My mam seemed to like him too which was obviously a good thing.
We continued this ritual for a few months but I could sense that he was he was getting frustrated and wanted to take things further, but he didn't say anything. I don't know if it was because he just didn't want to pressure me or if he had given up on me. It was irrelevant though because I was a good girl, at that age...
Then at 16 things changed so quickly and my world was turned upside down. He dumped me, I never got a reason. I discovered soon after he dumped me that he was seeing another girl already. She was one of the popular girls and I knew that she was a bit wilder than me, fair enough I thought, I am a good girl remember.
I left school soon after and moved on to the local college, training to be a nurse. I made new friends and I loved the course, nursing really interested me. It was one of these friends who introduced me to Gary. Gary was actually very similar in appearance to Craig, dark hair and eyes and a great smile. I was instantly attracted to him, and it was obvious to everyone else who was out that evening. We sat together all night and chatted as if we had known each other for years. By the end of the evening my cheeks were hurting from smiling so much. I spent the next couple of weeks constantly thinking about Gary and just trying to catch a glimpse of him around the college. I even woke up sweating one night and realised that it was Gary that I had been dreaming about. Was I really such a good girl after all.
It had been two weeks since the night out, I had given up hope that he was interested in me, and then I saw him. He was walking through the student common room at the college and he was heading in my direction. Oh my god, was he going to talk to me? He gave me a lovely smile, which was always a something I found attractive in a boy.
"Where have you been hiding stranger?" He said.
I just took a large intake of breath and stuttered a bit. Wow, I thought to myself, he must think I'm a proper loser. Gary just laughed and said that he had been hoping to bump into me. The tension had been broken and we chatted away about how his Mechanics course was going and about how I was going to be the next Florence Nightingale.
"What are you doing lunch time?" He asked, "Fancy meeting me and walking into town for some chips?"
Not the most romantic but it sounded great to me.
"Love to." I said.
"Good, it's a date." He smiled and added "Our first date."
We met for lunch that day and every day for the next week. Then he asked me if I wanted to go out with him.
"I mean proper go out." He said, "Like boyfriend and girlfriend."
I was over the moon and said yes immediately. Over the next couple of months I really fell hard for him and felt that he was the one.
Soon after my 18th birthday we had sex for the first time. It wasn't great and I wondered what all the fuss was about. Being just a naive young girl, I left the contraception to him and predictably found myself pregnant just a few months later. My parents were great about it and when the baby was born, although we were already overcrowded, they allowed Gary to move in with us and did everything they could to help us get our own council house. My Mam even came with me to the doctors to get me on the contraceptive pill to make sure that the next baby would be planned. We finally got our own house and by 19 I was a stay at home married mum. That was the end of my dream of becoming a nurse. Things quickly deteriorated and a year later, after taking one slap too many, I told Gary it was over and he needed to move out. He was dead set against it but when I told my 3 older brothers what had been going on, they persuaded him it would be in his best interests if he moved back home to his Mam's.
So that was it, 20 years old with a baby and no way of supporting us. I managed to get a part time job working in a coffee shop. My Mam had the baby for a few hours each day for me to work and Gary took him to his Mam's every other weekend. I soon settled into my new life and I enjoyed working in the cafe and meeting people. After a few weeks of working there, a middle aged man started coming in regularly, he was pleasant and chatty and always left a little tip. He started coming in when I was due to have my break, he would sit with me and make me laugh. He told me that his name was Ray. He was quite tall and stocky and it was obvious that he looked after himself. Then, about a month later, out of the blue, one day, he asked me if I would like to go for a proper drink one night. At 40, he was twice my age but I thought what harm could it be, I deserved a night out so I accepted.
We arranged to meet the following weekend when Shane, my son, would be stopping with his Dad. When the time came, I couldn't believe how nervous and excited I was. What should I wear? It wasn't a proper date after all, was it? As it was summer, I chose a casual summer dress, checking with my sister first of all to make sure that it was neither too short nor too frumpy. We met in town and he suggested going out for a ride to a nice pub by a river just on the outskirts of the next town. We had a light meal and a couple of drinks and my nervousness soon disappeared as he complimented me on how nice I looked and had me laughing at his corny jokes. At the end of the night, he drove me home and my worries about whether or not I should ask him in became nonexistent as he kissed me on the cheek, thanked me for a lovely evening and said he hoped we could do it again soon. I felt as if I floated into the house and couldn't wait to see him again. We met a couple more times then he took me out for the day. We held hands as we walked alongside the river, again had a lovely evening meal and he took me home. This time his goodnight kiss was on the lips, really tender and loving. I really wanted to invite him in this time but I knew my Mam was there looking after Shane. I explained and apologised, he said not to worry, the time would come when it was right. What a lovely man.